Please Send Prayers My Way- I Lost My Dad Last Night

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Discussion Overview

The thread centers around a participant, Heather, who is seeking support after the sudden loss of her father. Many participants express their condolences, share personal experiences of loss, and offer emotional support during this difficult time.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based

Main Points Raised

  • One participant, identifying as a consultant, shares their experience of losing their father in a similar manner and expresses understanding of Heather's feelings.
  • Several participants express their condolences and offer prayers for Heather and her family.
  • Another participant mentions the importance of allowing oneself to grieve and shares their personal approach to handling loss.
  • One participant discusses the impact of loss on children and shares their experience of including their kids in funeral services.
  • Another participant suggests that decisions regarding children's involvement in the services should be based on what feels right for Heather and her family.
  • Several users mention their own experiences with loss and how it has affected them over time.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

While many participants agree on the importance of emotional support and prayers, views differ regarding the involvement of children in funeral services, with no clear consensus emerging on the best approach.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects a shared understanding of grief and personal experiences related to losing a parent, highlighting the emotional challenges faced by those in similar situations.

Who May Find This Useful

This thread may be useful for members of the consultant community who are navigating their own experiences of loss or seeking support for others in similar situations.

Hang in there, sweetie! I am so very sorry! {{{{HUGS}}}}
 
On the kids, only YOU know your kids best. Mine were 4 1/2 and 2 at the time. Both were allowed at the viewing/visitation and wanted to be there. It was my time to explain things to them. They didn't spend all the time with us, they had their time then were watched. At the funeral my DD sat with me for half, my son was in the nursery. The other half she was in the nursery. We had a recording of DD saying goodbye to grandpa and saying how she'd miss him and see him in heaven someday.We made sure they were by our side at the burial and wanted them to see that and see the flag folding and presentation to my mom.Make your decision based on your kids and what they will do best with...and whatever YOU decide, don't let anyone else critique.
 
I'll pray for you and your family.
 
Heather, I'm so sorry. You and your family wlil be in my prayers.
 
I'm so sorry for your loss Heather - praying for strength and comfort for you and your family.
 
Heather I am so sorry for your loss.

I would include your son in as much of the services as possible - as long as he can sit still for long periods of time. I say this because my children at that age would be fine; however, my sister's kids would not be good. they usually have a room where family members can go for breaks. Make sure you take a long something for him to maybe play with, read, etc. in the break room.

I think it's a learning experience even though he is young. This is just my opinion.

May the memories of your Dad help you during this most difficult time.

God Bless you and your family.
 
Oh Heather, I am so sorry to hear about losing your Dad. I will certainly pray for you and your family.
 
Heather - I am soo sorry for your loss! I, too, lost my dad 2 1/2 years ago very suddenly and unexpected. If you need to talk - just pm and I will give you my number - again - big hugs and I am so sorry!
 
I am so sorry to hear about losing your Dad.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #40
Thank you all! It means so much to me.
 
heather223 said:
Hi, I am asking for everyone's thoughts and prayers right now. I lost my dad last night to a massive heart attack. It was very unexpected and I am just so sad and numb right now. It hasn't really hit me yet and I am sure the worse is to come. :cry:

I am so deeply sorry, Heather.
 
Heather, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry to hear this news. Sending you many hugs! :angel:
 
Prayers for you and you family during this time.
 
Heather...heartfelt prayers for you and your family. The Lord will give you the strength to make it through one day at a time...sometimes one minute at a time. The grieving process is different for each person, so let yourself feel whatever it is that you feel. I know, personally, that I got through the funeral and stuff for my mom...then at about 4 months it hit me all over again. I wish there was something to say to help, but know that there are many of us on here praying for you and holding you up!
 
Heather,
You are in my prayers. My mom passed away suddenly after surgery last August so I can relate to what you're going through. It has been six months and there are still times that I will remember something and start to cry, but it does get easier with time. Hang in there!
 
Heather, so sorry for your loss, your family is in my prayers.
 
My thoughts & prayers are with you. I still have both my parents, but lost a sister in a roll-over and a brother in a house fire. The pain never goes away, but time heals. God Bless.
 
I'm so sorry for your loss. I will pray for your family to find peace and comfort.

As for your son, my brother was eight when our grandmother passed suddenly. He had been very, very close to her - much closer than the rest of us grandkids. He was there for everything. The family night and the funeral and graveside service. I think it helped him process everything. I hope you find a solution that works for your family and Josh's best interests.
 
Heather,
You are in my thoughts and prayers. I lost my mother 5 years ago. It is heartbreaking, but as they say- time does make it better.
 
If you feel Josh is mature enough to handle it, let him go. If he seems to be overly upset, then don't let him attend the funeral itself. That is pretty young to deal with the death of a close grandparent. My Dad died after 3-1/2 years as an invalid with Alzheimer's 26-1/2 years ago in August. I still miss him. My Mom will be gone from cancer 12 years in April. Your memories will keep him alive to your children! Keep pictures of him with them where they can see them. The most cherished pictures for my daughter are those with her Maw in the 14 years she had her with us. I was pregnant with her when my Dad died. I still cry when the grandkids do something that I wish I could tell Maw and Poppie about!
 
I am so sorry for your loss, my deepest sympathies for you and your family.
Prayers coming your way for peace.
 
I just read this, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss, you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.
 
Heather I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers.

As someone else posted earlier, only YOU know your children and what they can and can not handle. Whatever your decision is, it will be the right one.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #54
Thank you all. I can feel your prayers working- today I am a little better, but it still hurts. I still know the worst is yet to come. I will keep you all updated.

We decided to let my son make his own choice and he wants to come say goodbye to his papa. We are letting him attend everything.
 
Heather if you need to talk with someone pm me and I will give you my phone number. I am only 4 1'2 years out from loosing my father.
 
You and your family will be in my prayers. My dad has heart problems, so, this is always a thought in the back of my mind.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #57
jrstephens said:
You and your family will be in my prayers. My dad has heart problems, so, this is always a thought in the back of my mind.

That is what is making me so angry about this- we knew he had heart problems. He had a heart attack 5 years ago and has been going to the doctor and on medicine ever since. I know it isn't just the doctors fault, it is also his because he didn't make the lifestyle changes he needed to, but I am still very angry.
 
heather223 said:
That is what is making me so angry about this- we knew he had heart problems. He had a heart attack 5 years ago and has been going to the doctor and on medicine ever since. I know it isn't just the doctors fault, it is also his because he didn't make the lifestyle changes he needed to, but I am still very angry.

Heather, understand that anger is part of the grief - My dad was at the doctor on August 9th - clean bill of health - died suddenly on the 12th - you will experience more emotions in the next few weeks then you have in years - I was angry, sad, happy, scared, worried - just to name a few - embrace the emotions as they come and let them work their way... Try to remember all the wonderful memories, and allow yourself to cry as much as you need - It really took me a full year to not cry everyday over losing my dad. Time does heal the hurt but it never fully goes away.

Prayers and hugs!!!!
 
Heather ~ may all your happy memories help you through this very difficult and sad time. Regarding the kids...when my FIL died, my nephew and niece (same ages as your at the time) ~ nephew was allowed to do and the niece was not. The nephew seem to be be at peace and seemed to grieve well (this was 6 years ago). My niece was angry she wasn't allowed. When she and her parents have a scuffle about something else...she always brings out how they didn't allow her to say good-bye to Grandpa. With saying this, YOU know you kids better than anyone here on this board. Go with your gut feeling. You are the best judge for them. You will be in my thoughts/prayers for the days to come.
 
I am very sorry to hear of your loss Heather.
 

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