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Pampered Chef: Host Coaching Will my saga w/ my nightmare host ever end?

  1. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    I've posted about this particular host a couple times. I guess I should've found the thread and connected it, but oh well. :rolleyes:

    It went from being a Feb. show, to being a March show, to turning into a March catalog show. Then she needed an extra week from when she wanted to close the show. Then we finally got everything entered in and I gave her all the totals. She said she had all the checks from her friends and would mail them the next day. That was last Monday. I e-mailed her on Thursday, this is part of what I wrote her:

    I was wondering if you had a chance to put those checks in the mail?
    As of today they haven't arrived, so I can't submit your show yet.
    Just let me know if there was a problem with anything or if you have
    any questions about anyone's total amounts.


    This what she wrote back:

    No problem! I just threw them in 2 days ago. I was still waiting on two and I didn't want to send them separately.


    It only takes 2 days for me to get mail from her area. So if that was the case, I should've had them that day. So they still haven't arrived. Now I'm worried that they got lost or she lied to me.

    So I just e-mailed her this:

    I just thought I'd let you know that the checks haven't arrived yet. I'm hoping they arrive in time so I can submit your show by Tuesday. Should we have your friends just pay with debit/credit cards? I can call them and get the info. Or we could put it on your credit card and have them reimburse you? What do you think we should do? If they want to just do credit cards/debit then if the checks arrive, I can just shred them or something. I just hope they didn't get lost in the mail. I'm wondering if you had my address right? xxx,xxxxxx, PA xxxxx?

    Just let me know what you think we should do.



    Hopefully, that covers all the bases and yet it doesn't accuse her of lying. So I wonder if she's going to write me back. This host also just had a purse party on Friday night. She had a very small catty show with me because she thinks her friends are all tapped out or were holding out because they planned to buy at her purse show. I'm also wondering if she just started planning and stressing over that party, that she didn't follow through with mine.
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #1
  2. I too have a nightmare host...she has been a great host in the past..so this situation is SOOO frustrating! She hosted a November show - that she finally closed on December 15th - I had to drop by her house on Dec 19th to pick up a cheque to cover her balance + another couple of guests. $170 in total. Her items shipped, her cheque bounced :mad: and she promised me that she'd get me the money. Here it is 3 months later and she now won't answer my emails, voice mails - or the notes I've left stuck to her door. I spoke to her sister in law on Saturday and asked her to have her call me. I understand that this happens to everyone at some point in their life but please have the decency to call me back and make a plan to return what is rightfully mine. I called HO and they told me that they can't do anything - had not suggestions and told me it was between her and I. I specifically told her that this comes out of my grocery money and that it has nothing to do with PC...no response. AAAGHH! Anyone have any suggestions?
     
  3. Go to your city's City Attorney's office. Writing a check knowing it will not clear (and it is your account, so you should know) is a criminal offense. I would nicely tell her via voicemail, then send her a certified letter of what you will be forced to do if she doesn't return your call, then do it! If she doesn't respect you enough to communicate with you, I wouldn't worry about turning her in!

    lk in MO
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #3
  4. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    Yeah, see I refuse to submit unless I have the checks in hand. I've heard too many horror stories about people not getting paid. It's too bad people have to be so dishonest.
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #4
  5. Nanisu

    Nanisu Veteran Member Gold Member

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    Here it is 3 months later and she now won't answer my emails, voice mails - or the notes I've left stuck to her door. I spoke to her sister in law on Saturday and asked her to have her call me. I understand that this happens to everyone at some point in their life but please have the decency to call me back and make a plan to return what is rightfully mine.

    I would tell her VIA HER SISTER that you are hoping to work this out before you have to turn her name in to the correct authorities for check fraud....I know this sounds harsh but she is obviously ducking you and at this point you can't worry about offending her--geez, she stole from you.
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #5
  6. Well something finally worked since my last post I have received 2 emails from her! She apparently has had alot going on in her life and didn't have time in 3 months to call me. :eek: Finally - now my husband won't have to pay a visit to her house - which he was threatening to do!
     
  7. Gina M

    Gina M Veteran Member Gold Member

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    Isn't it amazing when people can't pick up the phone and take 2 minutes out of their day in a whole three months and resolve an issue?:) Hopefully you will get your money!
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #7
  8. chefann

    chefann Legend Member Gold Member

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    Michele, this is off topic, but you can't link your PWS in your signature here. HO monitors these boards and will contact you if they see it. If you want to include the info so that other consultants can use your PWS for ideas, just put ../PWSsuffix. And don't make it an active link.
     
    Mar 30, 2009
    #8
  9. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    I didn't hear back from her after I sent that e-mail. On Tuesday I called her on my cell phone while I was on my way to meeting with another host to close a show. She answered right away. (Probably answered because she saw it was a wireless caller--I bet if I had called from home and she saw it was me she wouldn't have answered. :rolleyes:)

    I told her that I wasn't sure if she got my e-mail the other day or not, but that the checks still hadn't arrived and was wondering what our next step should be. She then told me that she felt so bad... apparently, she had put the envelope in a stack of outgoing mail with her business stuff (she works at home) and her husband was supposed to mail them off. He heard my voicemail the other day and realized that he never got them mailed off. They had run out of stamps or something. She felt bad because her other DS party over the weekend went so well and was so easy and closed without any problems, etc. So now they got mailed and I should have them. She told me to call her Thursday if they don't arrive.

    So...they didn't arrive. Shocker. :rolleyes:

    I called her, just like she told me to and just told her they hadn't arrived. She started to sound bothered by it all. She said she's been really busy and her life is so crazy right now. She was like, "Well, all I know is they've been mailed and you should have them. I don't know what else to tell you." I told her that I guess we'll have to wait a day and hope they come, but that I was just calling her as she had requested me to. She said she's very busy and I should e-mail her on Monday (today) with news.

    So, no checks still, I don't know what to do. The host she booked from placed an order with a CC and one other guest is a CC. All the others are checks.

    She said that her friends are anxious to get their items. UGG!!!!!!!

    Do I tell her: at this point, I cannot submit her show. We need to have them pay by CC or put it on hers and have them pay her back. If checks arrive, I will shred them, or they can cancel them.

    Honestly, what on earth do I say now? She is either completely lying to me or the checks got lost in the mail, or stolen. I do not want to be bad-mouthed by her to all her guests. Plus I even got a possible booking from one of her friends. I have really been trying to be friendly and accommodating all through this saga with her. The previous host was nothing but kind and fun and easy. This is a nightmare for me.
     
    Apr 6, 2009
    #9
  10. cmdtrgd

    cmdtrgd Legacy Member Gold Member

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    Call the guests and apologize for the delay and inconvienence but it seems that their checks have been lost in the mail. Ask if they would like to pay by debit or credit and offer an apology gift (Season's Best or something - just say "a free product") to add to their order.
     
    Apr 6, 2009
    #10
  11. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    Unfortunately, it's a catalog show and she didn't give me anyone's phone numbers or e-mail address.
     
    Apr 6, 2009
    #11
  12. pckellyd

    pckellyd Member Gold Member

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    I think at this point what I would do is send her an e-mail stating something along the lines of

    Host,
    I am so sorry to bother you about this again, but the checks have still not arrived. at this point I'm afraid we have to assume that the checks are lost in the mail. I truly want this to be as easy as possible for you and understand that you're very busy, if you can give me the phone numbers or e-mail addresses for your friends that ordered I can make a few quick calls and let them know their payments have been lost in the mail, and I can obtain alternate payment arrangements. That way you don't have to worry about it anymore. Hope to hear from you soon!

    and then... if she gives you the information I'd find a way to let them know she is just now sending the payment so they know you're not at fault. Something like Host mailed me the payment on X day, and since I've still not received it we're assuming that they've gotten lost in the mail, and then let them know if you recieve the original checks you'll either pop them back in the mail to them or shred them per their instructions.

    That way the host doesn't feel you're blaming her in the e-mail to her, and her friends KNOW who was at fault by you saying they were just now mailed. It's one way of showing the truth w/o you making her look bad to her friends.
     
    Apr 6, 2009
    #12
  13. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    That sounds great. Thanks for the help! :)
     
    Apr 6, 2009
    #13
  14. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    Well that went badly. She is mad at me. She wrote me a really long and nasty e-mail about how overbearing I've been. She did happen to find the envelope with the checks in her business cabinet. Apparently her husband still hadn't mailed it. She's had a lot going on. I know she has been stressed out, I should have just ended things with her sooner. I tried going by what she wanted to do. I need to bless and release this one. But I still feel horrible and am very upset right now. Maybe I'm too high-strung for this business. Maybe I'm too eager for a show, that I was insensitive to her circumstances. I'm very frustrated with myself.
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #14
  15. babyicebean

    babyicebean Member

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    I can't see where you have been overbearing.You did as she requested and while she may have a lot going on in her life that surely isn't your problem.
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #15
  16. pampchefsarah

    pampchefsarah Senior Member Gold Member

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    I'm sorry, but you notified her several times the checks had not yet been received, and she still failed to make sure they were mailed, her guests now have to wait an additional week (at least, since you still don't have the checks) to receive their orders, you offered her alternative solutions to close the show as quickly as possible - and she's mad at you?!

    You're neither high-strung nor insensitive. I'm really bad at mailing things (REALLY BAD), but I know it's my own fault for not wanting to take 10 minutes to write out an envelope, add a stamp, then spend a few more minutes driving to the post office. I would never blame someone else who found the need to constantly remind me to do what I'm responsible to do. You're running a business, and she has no respect for that (surprising, since she runs her own business out of her home - would she accept the same tired excuses from her clients?).

    I would call her and say I'm sorry she's upset, but it's not just you who is being affected, it is her guests who placed and paid for orders they expected to receive within two weeks of the show. If the checks have not yet been placed in the mail, she'll need to give you her credit card number to cover the orders, so you can close the show right now. If she insists the checks have been mailed, tell her you'll need the phone numbers of each paying guest, so if the packet is not received by Thursday you can contact them to get their credit card numbers, and also let them know the delivery has been delayed due to the checks being 'lost in the mail.' Don't hang up until you have either the phone numbers or her credit card information.
     
  17. legacypc46

    legacypc46 Senior Member Gold Member

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    First off: {{{hugs}}}. You don't deserve the treatment you have received from this host. She has been manipulating you. Even if her life has been as crazy as she says, her lack of respect for your business and her sense of personal responsibility in this are overwhelmingly lame. Honestly, who would think it is okay to receive something that hasn't been paid for? At this point, I think you are right to want to bless and release.

    Pleae don't feel so distressed or think you are too high-strung for this business. The way it sounds to me, you both care and value others. Nothing wrong there! Seems like you simply stumbled upon a person who is irresponsible and kinda mean. That is HER problem, not yours. I know it stinks to loose the sales, but smile and let it go.

    leggy
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #17
  18. kam

    kam Legacy Member Staff Member

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    Seriously?? Did she say she expected you to put in the order before receiving payment?? If not, then she must know that he longer it takes her to get you the payments...the longer it will take the show to arrive. How was she going to explain to here guests that the products didn't arrive?

    Wow...yes, these are the people that really drag us down. You are not at fault. Something sounds not right here.

    Think back to all your other hosts...have they expected orders to be submitted without payment? Common sense says that you need payment first. It was wrong of her to be nasty to you.

    I notice many times people can't take responsibility for their own actions and they need to blame SOMEONE ELSE. Well, since she admitted that she found the checks STILL not mailed...well, it can't be HER fault...so it must be YOURS! :)
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #18
  19. cookn' katie

    cookn' katie Member

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    Do you have enough payments to even submit $150. At this point, if so I would tell her that you are going to submit it on this date and or the orders that you have payment for will go to another show. Explain to the customers that she wasn't closing and that you wanted to get them their products in a timely fashion. I have had a few hosts who have done the same thing. I just threated to give away their orders and they closed a little quicker. I am sorry! This sucks!
     
  20. cookingwith_tara

    cookingwith_tara Advanced Member

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    I would not think anymore about it. You have to remember, this is YOUR business. This is your JOB. When people don't pay for their order, you can't submit the show therefore YOU DON"T GET PAID! With any other business, if you don't send in the payment they will call you and do whatever needs to be done until they get it. They even take notes and follow up just like we do. I think she's done a real good job in getting you to believe that she's just forgot or misplaced that envelope. And now, you feel as if YOU"VE done something wrong. YOU HAVEN"T! You've done an excellent job following up and following directions. You've done everything she asked you to do. I hate to say it, but, if it was me, I probably wouldn't have been so nice. I would've told her about this being your job and the whole getting paid thing and that you're trying to practice good business skills to her and her guests. And you can't have this lingering on. She should have the payments to you by a certain date or you will assume the guests changed their mind, since you don't have any contact info for them, and the show has been canceled. You'll submit the orders for the ones who paid w/ cc and send her (the host) a T.Y. gift for collecting them but other than that there's nothing more you can do. If you have to, tell her you are your own boss and you choose not to do business this way. You also have a lot going on in your life and it's frustrating for you as well. You don't mean to sound harsh but she should take a step back and think about how long this has been going on. I'm sure this will make her even more upset - but - when it comes down to it - it's her fault. This is one that I would definitely not do another show with. And if for some weird reason she asked in the future - I would refer her to someone else. My business is too important to me to allow ONE host to get me discouraged. I choose NOT to get stressed out in this business. Remember, this business is what you make it. Don't let these circumstances cause you to throw it all in. From your posts, it seems as if you've tried and followed everything. THIS, TOO, SHALL PASS! :rolleyes:
     
  21. chefann

    chefann Legend Member Gold Member

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    It's not you - it's the host. She's still refusing to take responsibility for her own actions, as indicated by the part I bolded. SHE can't go to the post office, or (heaven forbid!) put the envelope in her own mailbox to be picked up? She sounds like the type of person who has an excuse for everything, and is never at fault, even when she clearly is.

    When you get the checks, if there are phone numbers on any of them, use those to call the people who placed orders and give them an update on the status. Unfortunately, some may take the opportunity to cancel their order. But you never know - maybe someone else will add to theirs, or book their own show.
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #21
  22. gingertannery

    gingertannery Advanced Member Gold Member

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    What a nightmare!!! She is a blamer.. don't EVEN play into that thought process. It is everyone elses fault to her.. and that will not change. So.. just understand we deal with the public.. and some are not mature..just count your blessings that you are not that way!! Hold your chin up and this will be over soon!! The worst thing you could do is feel you are responsible.. Your job is to submit in a timely fashion to assure the "Guests" are taken care of. Her friends probably know excatly how she is..so relax and it will be over soon. I agree that you should let them know -you just received their check in the mail xxx date and you are letting them know that you are depositing the check and sending off the order..just for their info... (that is... when you get the checks) Then move on to more respectful hosts.....you are so patient!! Don't give up!!
     
  23. BlessedWifeMommy

    BlessedWifeMommy Veteran Member

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    (((hugs))) Sorry she has been so hard to deal with. Is she close enough to go get the checks from her (sorry I can't remember)? I would be over sweet and nice. Once you do get the checks you will have more info about the customers that are ordering. I would write a sweet note to go with their receipts and give a gift to smooth things over with them. If they are close enough, have the order shipped to you so you can take the orders all put together, so this host won't have anything else to do but hand them out.
     
  24. pcchefjane

    pcchefjane Senior Member Gold Member

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    I would definitely have the Show orders shipped to yourself! No telling how long after she receives them will she "remember" to sort and give them out! I'd be afraid that they would lay around until she is "not too busy" to get them sent out. That is why we all need to get name/address/phone on each and every order. Use the "guarantee is not valid without the name and address and phone of the guest" line. I also had my Recruit tell a couple of hosts that knew that Shanda and her family were having a hard time financially that after the last day of the month, her commission is delayed two weeks and she really needs the money!

    Maybe in the future, you can give your Hosts that you can't go by after the Show to get their checks from the Show a self-addressed stamped envelope from you to mail the checks in. That would eliminate excuses of "lost the address", "didn't have a stamp", etc.! Sorry you have had to go through such a lousy Host!
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #24
  25. etteluap70PC

    etteluap70PC Legacy Member Gold Member

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    Hosts like this are the reason I have put on my OOF's that orders cannot be processed without first and last name as well as a phone # or email. I MUST have a way to contact these people directly. I also STRONGLY encourage debit or Credit cards. I go over this in coaching especially with catalog hosts.

    Hugs to you... not every host is like this!
     
  26. Lorna May

    Lorna May Member Gold Member

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    I know I shouldn't think bad of people but on occasion it seems obvious to me, perhaps I can be a cynic at times. You have encountered a scammer and the only reason you have experienced her wrath is you did not fall for it.
    You have been fantastic throughout all this and I appreciate the learning you have shared with me. The only lesson I believe worth taking from this is make sure you have customers full name and phone number on all future orders, (for your customer care calls)
    Bless and Release
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #26
  27. BlessedWifeMommy

    BlessedWifeMommy Veteran Member

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    I really like this idea! Do you have a OOF that you can post?
     
  28. raebates

    raebates Legend Member Staff Member

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    I would guess that her nasty response came from embarrassment. I've noticed that many people respond with anger when they're embarrassed. We're a society that is incredibly uncomfortable saying sincerely, "I'm so sorry. It was my fault." Saying, "You idiot, it was your fault," is much easier for most of us.

    Is is possible that, in your zeal, you were a bit insensitive? Possibly. Is any of this your fault? Absolutely not.
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #28
  29. etteluap70PC

    etteluap70PC Legacy Member Gold Member

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    here it is.. I adapted it from one Carolyn (I think) posted about a year ago.
     

    Attached Files:

  30. Flamingo

    Flamingo Advanced Member Gold Member

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    Oh my gosh this is great...... THANKS!!!!
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #30
  31. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    Thanks everyone for the support today. I really needed the hugs. ;)

    In her e-mail to me, she closed by saying that she was going to put it in her mailbox right after writing her e-mail. So hopefully, she did. If I don't get them, I'm going to contact the two orders that were paid by credit card that totaled $160 and see if they still would like to have the orders placed (one of those was the previous booking host--a relative to this host.) So I'm hoping it doesn't come to that.

    As far as shipping it to me, I'm afraid I can't do it. She lives far away from me and I have no idea where the people live that placed orders.

    This really has convinced me that I need to insist on getting names, phone numbers, and/or e-mail addresses from people. In the future, I will go over that in my host coaching--and that those numbers are strictly for guarantee purposes and that I won't add them to my contact list unless they request it when I make the customer care calls.

    I think I have been too eager to please hosts and keep things easy for them by not asking for that info. In the past I would just accept a name because they didn't have other info handy or didn't want to give it to me. I also didn't worry about outside order forms, because I thought it was inconvenient...they have to run off more copies if they run out, then I have to get them back somehow. I always provided them, but didn't make a fuss about them filling them out. I told hosts they could fill them out or just have them as a guide to when they had to calculate orders. What I find is that people still don't calculate orders correctly on them. So I like these OOF that you guys have shared here and in the past. I'm going to switch to using them. Now, how do you handle getting them back when the host lives far away and you can't/don't want to have to drive and pick them up?
     
    Apr 7, 2009
    #31
  32. cathyskitchen

    cathyskitchen Senior Member Gold Member

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    Enclose a self-addressed, stamped envelope in the Catalog Host packet next time - no excuses for not getting order forms/checks!
     
  33. chefann

    chefann Legend Member Gold Member

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    That's what I do, too. I put it in the host pack with a sticky note that says "Use this envelope to collect orders and payment." Then, at the show, I take off the sticky and tell the host to use it to mail me any after-show orders and checks, including hers.
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #33
  34. legacypc46

    legacypc46 Senior Member Gold Member

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    I love the SASE idea. Thanks for sharing! (Ah, another reason I love this site!)
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #34
  35. etteluap70PC

    etteluap70PC Legacy Member Gold Member

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    Ok so my form does not always help... I had 8 outside orders ($300!!!) for my show last night NO PH#'s!!!! HELLO!!!!!!! GRRRRRRRRR
     
  36. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    I just edited one that Becky D. shared (in the files it's called OOF-MINE, I think). I am also including this little blurb printed on bright paper and paper clipped to the OOF's with a SASE.

    Here are some Outside Order Forms. Please make more copies as needed. I will e-mail you the file as well, if it’s easier to just print more off.
    • Full name and phone number are required for guarantee purposes
    • If the information section is filled out completely, they will get a free Season’s Best cookbook with their order.
    • Any after-show orders and checks can then be mailed to me in the enclosed envelope.

    I copied and pasted this blurb several times on one page and have just cut off one slip for each host packet.
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #36
  37. ChefBeckyD

    ChefBeckyD Legend Member Gold Member

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    I have found that since adding onto the OOF the blurb about getting a free SB if their info is complete that I am getting alot more filled out forms! Amazing what a $1 cookbook can do! (and I just add them on to the hosts order and let him/her know who gets one.)
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #37
  38. babywings76

    babywings76 Legend Member Gold Member

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    I'm really getting excited about this. Thanks Becky, for sharing it. Now, to just get some new hosts and look ahead to better experiences! :)
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #38
  39. etteluap70PC

    etteluap70PC Legacy Member Gold Member

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    oooohhhhhh I like this! And sending them an emailed copy so they can print more! AWESOME!
     
  40. chefsteph07

    chefsteph07 Legacy Member

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    I am just now reading this..how unbelievable...

    I cannot believe that she found them in a cabinet and then blamed you for being overbearing!

    I love blaming things on my dh, then I can just say "oh, dh didn't do this, isn't that typical?" and laugh it off, which is what she should have done!
    I don't know if I'd have the orders sent to me anyway, I"d definitely take the numbers though and watch the shipping status so you know when they were delivered and then make a "courtesy call" when you know they arrived to let them know. It's not YOUR responsibility to make sure the guests get what they ordered, it's the hosts. But, you can at least inform them of when she has her products since it's been so long since the show date to when they are actually going to get them.
    What a pain!
     
    Apr 8, 2009
    #40
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