How Can I Help My Depressed Husband Struggling with Alcoholism?

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Discussion Overview

This thread discusses the challenges faced by a participant, Trish, whose husband is struggling with depression and alcoholism. Participants share their thoughts, experiences, and emotional support regarding the situation.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based
  • Supportive

Main Points Raised

  • One participant expresses concern for Trish's husband and suggests that he should not be left alone during this difficult time.
  • Another participant mentions the possibility of contacting a local chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous for support.
  • Several users offer prayers and emotional support for both Trish and her husband.
  • One participant emphasizes the importance of Trish taking action to help her husband, despite potential anger from him.
  • Trish shares an update indicating her husband is feeling better after starting anti-depressants but still struggles with alcohol, noting her personal affirmations regarding his recovery.
  • Another participant suggests involving church members who can provide support without judgment.
  • One participant recounts a personal experience with an intervention that led to a family member agreeing to go to rehab.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ on the best approach to support Trish's husband, with some participants advocating for immediate action and others focusing on emotional support and prayer. No clear consensus emerges on a single solution.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects personal experiences and emotional responses to the challenges of dealing with a loved one's addiction and mental health issues.

Who May Find This Useful

Participants in similar situations, particularly those dealing with a loved one's struggles with alcoholism and mental health, may find the shared experiences and support helpful.

T
Trish in Texas
Gold Member
Messages
227
My husband is feeling very depressed, almost suicidal today (due to his drinking problem). I'm at work all day at a part-time job so I can't be with him. Please pray for him. Thanks.

Trish
 
BIG (((hugs))) sweetie! Is there anyone you can send to go talk to him right now? Don't let him be alone right now if at all possible!
 
You could call a local chapter of AA & someone would go over....
 
Both of you are in my prayers.
 
Hi sugar! You can NOT ignore this! It's your responsibility to get him some help because in his current state, he can't help himself. Yes, I'm sure he's going to be angry, argumentative, etc, etc, to infinity.....but wouldn't you rather he was alive to BE mad at you? Call someone NOW. Don't wait, do it NOW! Hugs:)
 
Just wondering how he's doing?
 
Trish, I just saw this, but I'm praying. Please give us an update.
 
I am so sorry you are going through this! {Hugs} And, I agree getting help is a big step!
 
  • Thread starter
  • #9
He's doing better...got back on some anti-depressants the doctor prescribed. As to the drinking, we will see. I've turned him over to God on that issue because I know I can't do anything about it. I'm just making positive affirmations..."I have a nice, clean, sober husband who is happy and successful and loves me very much and is truthful and straightforward." He's been sneaking out in the middle of the night to get beer but, at least he's stoppsd taking the car to do it. He has no license and I don't carry insurance on him for that reason. With beer in the car, he'd really get wapped if he got stopped.

Trish
 
Glad to know he is feeling a little better. That must have been very scary for you both. Praying now for a complete healing of his spirit.
 
Are you active in a church? Is there some men who can "come alongside him" that have been where he is? I know in my church, we have deacons who will do just that...in a loving spirit with no "condemnation! Praying for you and him!
 
Oh, you can definitely do an intervention. My BIL, his 3 siblings and his mother did it to his father. The father wasn't too happy about it, but agreed to go to rehab. They already had his suitcase packed, they loaded him into the vehicle & drove him to a facility that they had already spoken to prior to the intervention. There are definitely ways to make your demands known. BIG (((hugs))) at no point is it fair for you to have to go through this. I hope that he can decide that you and your life together is more important than the alcohol and that he is able to make a decision to find the help that he needs.
 

Frequently Asked Questions

What are some signs that my husband is struggling with alcoholism?

Common signs of alcoholism include increased tolerance to alcohol, withdrawal symptoms when not drinking, neglecting responsibilities, and continued use despite negative consequences. You may also notice changes in mood, behavior, or social circles. It's important to approach these signs with compassion and understanding.

How can I support my husband in seeking help for his alcoholism?

Encourage open and honest communication about his struggles. Offer to help him find professional support, such as therapy or support groups like Alcoholics Anonymous. Be patient and let him know that you are there for him, but also set boundaries to protect your own well-being.

What role does my husband's depression play in his alcoholism?

Depression and alcoholism often coexist, as individuals may use alcohol to cope with feelings of sadness or hopelessness. It's essential to address both issues simultaneously, as treating one can positively impact the other. Encourage him to seek help for his depression as well.

How can I take care of myself while supporting my husband?

Supporting a loved one with alcoholism can be emotionally draining. Make sure to prioritize your own mental and physical health by engaging in self-care activities, seeking support from friends or family, and possibly attending support groups for yourself, such as Al-Anon.

What should I avoid saying or doing when discussing his alcoholism?

Avoid blaming, shaming, or criticizing your husband, as this can lead to defensiveness and further withdrawal. Instead, focus on expressing your concern and love. Avoid ultimatums or threats, as they can create resentment. Approach the conversation with empathy and understanding.

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