I May Have to Shoot My Husband...

[AJPratt]

I may have to smack my husband...When I learned what Wave I was in, I asked DH to put in for vacation time at work, since this was so important. Well, I guess you can figure out where this story is going. He never put it in until this past Tuesday. Turns out, that his "Backup" will be away at the same time and they are giving him a hard time. There is a very good chance that they will deny him. Every time he takes off they give him a hard time. He never calls out, never gets sick.
I have paid for airfare, hotel and conf reg for him. I am so mad I could just spit. I am sooo mad at him, too. He has just been doing stupid stuff like this lately and I can't take it anymore. http://www.clicksmilies.com/s1106/aktion/action-smiley-060.gif

OH, and to add to the stress: We are also in the process of starting a Coffee House and will know Monday or Tuesday if we got the loan. The idea was for me to run the coffee biz and him to keep his job with the benefits. He is just not happy with his job and this is the icing on the cake. I told him, that either way, he is going to conference. Even if he has to put in his notice.

I guess I'm looking for some suggestions or maybe just some shoulders to vent on.

(Edited to change title... didn't seem appropriate)

 

[MomToEli]

I'll lend you a shoulder, Anne.

My dh didn't put in for vacation either. I was only depending on him for childcare, though. I can still hire a babysitter.

Hey - maybe you can hire a "husband" for NC? Who would know??

 

[chefann]

Awwww... big BIG hugs to you Annie!Men! Sheesh!

 

[genburk]

Hey - maybe you can hire a "husband" for NC? Who would know??

Anne,

you could hire a model to be a stand in husband....

I bet your husband will BE SURE to put in for vacation NEXT year...

if you don't keep the model husband instead

 

[AJPratt]

Thanks. I'm just so mad. We lost out on one location because he didn't call the seller and let him know we were putting in an offer and then Sunday he mailed out a check for our mortgage for $20,090.00, instead of $2090 due. Did I mention that we don't have $20K+ in our checking account? Do I have to do everything? I mean, really, do I?!

 

[genburk]

Did they really try to cash the $20,090. or did they call you and say

HEY !!! Are you paying off your house this week? How many people do they think would really send a regular check for that amount and not mention it beforehand...?

 

[Jules711]

Just breathe. After all, it all happens at one time so that if it doesn't kill us it makes us homicidal (or stronger)... I can't remember. Good luck with everything. May God's plans for you happen with ease.

 

[raebates]

Oooohhhh, <<<<<HUGS>>>>> I'm so sorry, Anne. Testosterone poisoning strikes again. Just remember; you can shoot him, but a lifetime in prison is a high price for a few moments of pleasure.

 

[rennea]

Oh Anne sorry to hear of your troubles, thats men for you. Sorry to all those guys out their

I hope it works out and he gets the time off and you get your loan.

 

[katie0128]

Thanks. I'm just so mad. We lost out on one location because he didn't call the seller and let him know we were putting in an offer and then Sunday he mailed out a check for our mortgage for $20,090.00, instead of $2090 due. Did I mention that we don't have $20K+ in our checking account? Do I have to do everything? I mean, really, do I?!

Rhetorical question??? If you have to ask, then YES, you do.

Oh, and if you continue with your plan to shoot him, can I bring my DH, too and we can make it a "girls night out" event? I'm on the verge as well.

 

[pckrissy]

I'm sorry to hear about your stresses....I love my husband but boy would I love him more if he lived next door!! I don't know whose idea it was to choose a man to live with the rest of your life and NOT be able to strangle him!! They all get a case of the stupids sometimes it is just very stressfull when the get them for a long period of time! Take a deep breath (and perhaps a ****tail) and everything will work out...everything happens for a reason..that is how I have to look at life..
Congrats and good luck with the coffee house. Let me know where it is because I don't live that far from you I'd love to come visit...I love coffee and so do my friends! Lot of luck and (((hugs)))

 

[pcchris]

I'm sorry to hear about your stresses....I love my husband but boy would I love him more if he lived next door!!

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks for the laugh...I really needed that after the week I've had! (Of course, thanks to my DH!)

 

[dannyzmom]

ok...breathe, breathe, breathe...
given the way you feel about him right now maybe it's best (for his safety) that you go to NC without him And you'll then be able to rook with 3 other gals and save $ on teh hotel [since he just spent $20k you don't have ]

 

[reba515]

oh my you are all so funny !

can I come to the girls night out too? (with DH of course!)

well Anne on a positive note: at least he remembered to actually pay the mortgage!
we finally set up a direct/automatic payment so mine doesn't need to remember anymore. Now the phone/internet is a whole other story.

 

[lacychef]

Yes, of course we as women have to do everything! (sorry if you're reading KG!) Sorry to hear about your worries Anne! I'm sure it will all work out okay. Be sure to give us updates on the coffee shop! And I hope you got the check stopped

 

[ChefBeckyD]

Yes, of course we as women have to do everything! (sorry if you're reading KG!) Sorry to hear about your worries Anne! I'm sure it will all work out okay. Be sure to give us updates on the coffee shop! And I hope you got the check stopped

That's what I was hoping too! We have overdraft protection on our account - but not sure what the bank would do with that one!

I have to say though - that in our family, I'm the one who does the stupid stuff like this....my DH is pretty solid and steady. He's my rock!

 

[etteluap70PC]

I love and value my hubby and all he does for us but man..... some days!!! I would love to take him out back and slap him upside of his head!!!! ARGGGGG..
Some people say having pets helps you learn more patience for when you have children... I put husbands in that same category!

Anne.. I hope all goes smoothly with the coffee shop!

 

[AJPratt]

I started to respond individually, but it would have been a long post. As far as the check goes: He realized it a couple of days after he sent. He called our bank and did the stop payment and called the mort coand they said it would be ok. Well, they put it thru electronically. CRAP!! And, of course, it hit our account, but all was well after a couple of calls.

Krissy: Very cool you're not far at all!

Yes, my life hangs in the balance with this coffee thing. Its exciting and terrifying at the same time.

My husband BETTER go with me to NC. The ONLY reason my director's husband is going is because Dave is "going". Worst comes to worst, I will be posting an availability to share my room. I just hope he gets the time off. The VP is coming down and they'll talk about it on Tuesday... I just hope he wasn't already in trouble for something else.

On the way to meeting our roaster, we had a very calm conversation about why he should have put in vacation a while ago. But, what stinks is even if he put it in a while ago and this other guy requested time off, the other guy would get it because he's been there longer. So, we'll see...

Keep your fingers crossed and say your prayers that we get this funding because bot do we need it!

 

[Paige Dixon]

Anne,

you could hire a model to be a stand in husband....

I bet your husband will BE SURE to put in for vacation NEXT year...

if you don't keep the model husband instead

Probably cheaper in the long run...

 

[lizcooks4u]

Anne:

I started to respond individually, but it would have been a long post. As far as the check goes: He realized it a couple of days after he sent. He called our bank and did the stop payment and called the mort coand they said it would be ok. Well, they put it thru electronically. CRAP!! And, of course, it hit our account, but all was well after a couple of calls.

Krissy: Very cool you're not far at all!

Yes, my life hangs in the balance with this coffee thing. Its exciting and terrifying at the same time.

My husband BETTER go with me to NC. The ONLY reason my director's husband is going is because Dave is "going". Worst comes to worst, I will be posting an availability to share my room. I just hope he gets the time off. The VP is coming down and they'll talk about it on Tuesday... I just hope he wasn't already in trouble for something else.

On the way to meeting our roaster, we had a very calm conversation about why he should have put in vacation a while ago. But, what stinks is even if he put it in a while ago and this other guy requested time off, the other guy would get it because he's been there longer. So, we'll see...

Keep your fingers crossed and say your prayers that we get this funding because bot do we need it!

I sure do know how your husband feels. I've been at my same job (love my work but can't stand the mgt) anyhoo, I never get days off when requesting them, only if I make up my time.

I'm scheduled to have a surgery (tubal) in order to have off legally, but starting to think that's not the best way to get off for vacation either. I know you've been really trying to have a baby; I wanted my tubal at 18 and couldn't get it, I"m now 43 and starting to have 2nd thoughts. (I don't have kids either).

I"ve been job searching as well, and my current place of employement is desperate but I know once we go all electronic (Hospital Med recs) that I will be eliminated anyways. So I may as well go and enjoy myself

I really hate to cancel my surg as my OB/GYN made special arrangements for me to have it done on the Fri 6-29. I just don't know what to do.

Where I work my normal job we're never allowed any time off, sometimes we get Christmas but that's it!!

You do have your PC to fall back on and hopefully your coffee shop too. MY PC doesn't go anywhere and it's been my fun job; If I could get some recruits then maybe I could get somewhere; but just not having much luck in anything. I've also put PC on hold not knowing where I"ll be coding as I may be traveling nation wide or staying home????

Take CAre and please keep us posted!

liz

 

[AJPratt]

Thanks, Liz... I have a very similar job where I am the only person who does what I do. It doesnt make good business sense to do that, either. We'll just see what happens with the bank and his meeting.

 

[AJPratt]

UpdateI don't think my husband is going. They officially denied his vacation. I am just so mad at him! I hold out in the hopes that he may wind up going and I don't know why. This just kills me. I know its not the worst thing in the world, but c'mon...

 

[Teresa Lynn]

Anne,
I'm sorry!!
Please keep us updated on the coffee shop
Teresa

 

[sfdavis918]

I'm so sorry that this has happened Anne! Hugs to you!

I am just wondering though, do you think he "forgets" because he is not really into these things? Maybe he didn't want to go to NC and maybe he has some hang ups about the coffee thing? He may not be mentioning them because he knows they are so important to you?

As far as the mortgage check though, that was just a total dunderhead move!

Sarah

 

[AJPratt]

I'm so sorry that this has happened Anne! Hugs to you!

I am just wondering though, do you think he "forgets" because he is not really into these things? Maybe he didn't want to go to NC and maybe he has some hang ups about the coffee thing? He may not be mentioning them because he knows they are so important to you?

As far as the mortgage check though, that was just a total dunderhead move!

Sarah

Thanks... He thinks that I panic when I don't need to, and that I over react. Which, sure I can do that. This time he learned that sometimes I'm right. He REALLY wanted to go to NC because my director's husband is going and he wanted to see things in action. He feels TERRIBLE. And, while I am still POed, I also have a feeling that he is meant to stay here. Maybe the coffee thing will be underway, and he'll need to be here. As far as the coffee thing goes, after we met with a roaster last Sunday, I think he's mre excited about the coffee thing than I am. LOL

 

[lacychef]

THat's true, all things happen for a reason. Maybe while you're gone to NC, something big is gonna be happening with the coffee shop!
Will you be able to room with someone else?

 

[pamperedlinda]

Anne,

I had a dream about your coffee shop last night! (I have no idea why) But, for some odd reason I stopped in for coffee and you showed me how to roast coffee beans and then made me the best cup of coffee I ever had! A good premonition.....maybe!?

 

[ShanaSmith]

Hey Ann, we have one opening in our room at the Hilton if you need it!

 

[AJPratt]

Thanks for all of your support. Here's an interesting twist: There may be a friend of his purchasing the station that fired him (where I work now). Anyway, the guy is trying to get this done by July 1st. If he does, he wants to hire Dave back. Soooo... he'll be leaving where he is now and I'm sure will be able to take the time off. Keep your fingers crossed!

 

[chefann]

oooh! Fingers and toes are crossed! I hope it works out for you.

 

[raebates]

Fingers, toes, eyes, etc.hrd 2 typ tho

 

[mommyhugz1978]

HUGS Annie!!!! that is the pits!!! I will keep my fingers and toes and etc crossed for you!!!! ROFL

 

[chef131doreen]

I don't know if you have ever been to Conf before but there is not alot of time to be withyour DH , Classes all day the nights are the only time toghter , So before you kill him think about how much time you will have together

 

[AJPratt]

I've been to conf before, I wanted him to experience it. I signed him up for the general sessions and spouse outing. We also added some time to the trip to make it a bit of a vacation. The thing is that I've already paid for everything (which he knew), which is why I'm upset that he didn't put in for his time sooner.

 

[chefjwr]

Wow Anne, I am simply amazed your husband will go to National Conference. Way to take interest in what you are doing!! This is my positive thought. Does it help? I am in wave1. Still don't know who I am rooming with.

Julie

 

[smspamperedchef]

My husband is going with me AGAIN! The first year he said he had fun but said he wouldn't go back again as "it's just Pampered Chef stuff". Well, I think that was 3 years ago and he keeps going with me! Maybe he likes a change of scenery? Who Knows! However, this year I TOLD HIM he was going and I was going to "WALK" and I AM!!!
He's really not into the whole PC thing, but lately I guess since I've been busting my butt more towards my goals and reaching them. He seems a bit more interested when I tell him how a show went or whatever. I think he wants to go on the Cruise with me which I HAVE to earn! Just to show him I am doing something worthwhile and that I EARNED THE TRIP FOR US!!!

 

[mommyhugz1978]

I don't know if you have ever been to Conf before but there is not alot of time to be withyour DH , Classes all day the nights are the only time toghter , So before you kill him think about how much time you will have together

Spouses can take workshops too, and they have a special tour of HO and quite a few things for them to do!! So it's not like they sit in a hotel all day long waiting for you to get back!

 

[chef131doreen]

In that case I would shot him too ...
just to have you feel better I think MEN are all the same you say things and they forget a min later I had a Sat night crossed off on the Calender my DH boss called to work ot , he was ready to work on our Aniversary we planned to go for Dinner and a movie . he would have said yes if I had't been in the kitchen ......

 

[AJPratt]

My husband has a hard time saying "no", too. I think things might work out. FIngers crossed.

 

[MomToEli]

My husband has a hard time saying "no", too. I think things might work out. FIngers crossed.

I hope so, Anne. My dh has always attended conventions and galas with me for the other company I am affiliated with. We were actually going to take our 8 yo with us this year, but decided to go to Texas for Christmas instead of going to Atlanta (Hotlanta!) in August. I was really bummed to find out my ds can't go to NC with us. Not a big deal this year, but next, when I walk, it will be.

 

[janezapchef]

Anne,
I just started to read this thread today, and I have to say, it made me feel so much better about my husband's stupid moves lately (and my own, quite frankly)! Thanks!

On another note, I'm pretty sure you can still get your money refunded for his place if it doesn't work out. I had to back out of Leadership two years ago about a week before (I think it was that close) because I was having early complications with my pregnancy. I got a full refund from PC. Now, I did end up having to eat my airfare, and the people I was staying with had to scramble to find someone else to fill my hotel room slot. I'm sure you'd be able to find someone to stay with still at this point. People back out at the last minute every year. Hopefully, it all works out though.

 

[lacychef]

My husband has a hard time saying "no", too. I think things might work out. FIngers crossed.

I hope it works out! If so, will he be coming to the cheffer meeting?

 

[JackieBozeman]

I sure do know how your husband feels. I've been at my same job (love my work but can't stand the mgt) anyhoo, I never get days off when requesting them, only if I make up my time.

I'm scheduled to have a surgery (tubal) in order to have off legally, but starting to think that's not the best way to get off for vacation either. I know you've been really trying to have a baby; I wanted my tubal at 18 and couldn't get it, I"m now 43 and starting to have 2nd thoughts. (I don't have kids either).

I"ve been job searching as well, and my current place of employement is desperate but I know once we go all electronic (Hospital Med recs) that I will be eliminated anyways. So I may as well go and enjoy myself

I really hate to cancel my surg as my OB/GYN made special arrangements for me to have it done on the Fri 6-29. I just don't know what to do.

Where I work my normal job we're never allowed any time off, sometimes we get Christmas but that's it!!

You do have your PC to fall back on and hopefully your coffee shop too. MY PC doesn't go anywhere and it's been my fun job; If I could get some recruits then maybe I could get somewhere; but just not having much luck in anything. I've also put PC on hold not knowing where I"ll be coding as I may be traveling nation wide or staying home????

Take CAre and please keep us posted!

liz

Liz,

I had my tubes tied at 29. I knew then that I never wanted children and I have never regreted that decision. Only once did I feel that I'd made a mistake, but it was when my first husband and I were going through hard times and I thought a baby would resolve the issues. Of course, it wouldn't have. I have a good friend whose daughter asked her how I was able to afford my Harley and the trips I took. She said it was because I didn't have kids. At 43, I understand why you are having second thoughts, but just think of what your 20 year old kid would be doing for you when you are 63. They might be still at home, not getting a job, and you are still working to support him or her. Not my idea of fun. I'm 55 now, taking early retirement at 60, and looking forward to having a fantastic PC business to make up the 15% difference in pay for retiring early. Won't be a problem!!!