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Calling Local Couples: Etiquette for Weddings You're Not Invited To

In summary, if you find an engagement announcement in a local newspaper and you have no connection to the couple, you should send them a congratulatory note and offer to help them with their wedding planning.
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I have found a website that lists some local couples that are getting married in the near future as well as their info. Would it be ethical to call them even though I have no connection with them? If so, what would I say?
 
Does it list their phone numbers? If you have to look them up, I would be hesitant to call them.

I found some engagement annoucements and it lists their employers. I figured I'd send some wedding registry info to their work address and then leave it in their hands. I don't need to be "stalking" them.
 
Where did you find the website? Does it just list the local engagements for your area, or will it list them for all areas?
 
  • Thread starter
  • #4
It is just for my area. Is it kind of like a planning place.
 
I found some local ones in my newspaper.
They gave the names and I did an email search.
So I emailed two ladies about the wedding registry.
Nothing back yet, but I put it out atleast
 
I am not sure where I would stand on this one. On one hand I know that if I go to a bridal faire and give the info to the consultant, it would be expected for them to call me. But to just have my name in the paper and get a call from someone, might weird me out a little. Especially if it was to my work?!

Maybe make a connection with someone at the newspaper and maybe they can pass along the info instead?
 
I'd try to look up addresses and mail them something... but there's no way I'd feel comfortable calling...
 
I have to agree-that would weird me out a bit, especially if I didn't give out my info. Mailings would be ok though. That isn't so weird.
 
On the flip side of this, when my engagement was in the newspaper (featuring both last names) I was looked up (my address) and someone was soliciting me to purchase china. Personally, I felt turned off, and annoyed that someone would do such a thing. I realize PC is different as it has a registry, but this woman was soliciting me to purchase her china. It was weird.

Anyway just thought Id share. I just try to get to bridal shows, and leave a registry brochure out when I take orders at a show. You never k now who knows someone getting married. =)
 
  • #10
I don't think I would like someone to contact me like that either. It's bad enough that alot of places "sell" your information when you do business with them. Maybe you could see about advertising on that site?
 
  • Thread starter
  • #11
All of you have had great advice. I kind of felt like I shouldn't do this, but didn't want to miss an opportunity if it was okay. I'm going to leave them alone but contact the website to see if maybe I can get my info (brochure, recipe card, catalog) in an info packet - if they send one out. Thanks for all the replies!
 
  • #12
I have sent information to local brides to be in the past, but I never got any response.

If you've been here long, you won't be surprised that I feel a need to explain. ;) We have, maybe, 2 or 3 engagments listed in our paper in any given week. Of those, 65% are to be held within the following 2 weeks (not enough time to register or hold a shower), and 25% are for brides and grooms that live far away. That leaves only a couple of announcements a month (if I'm lucky) to contact. What I did was send a congratulatory note. I explained that I saw their announcement in the such-and-such paper. I told them that TPC offers bridal showers and a wedding registery. I told them how to contact me if they wanted more information. I ended with my best wishes, whether they contacted me or not.

I never felt it was pushy, and I never had any complaints. Of course, I never had any responses, either. :rolleyes:
 

Related to Calling Local Couples: Etiquette for Weddings You're Not Invited To

1. What is the proper etiquette for attending a wedding you were not invited to?

The proper etiquette for attending a wedding you were not invited to is to respect the couple's decision and not attend the wedding. It can be hurtful and disrespectful to the couple to show up uninvited. It is important to remember that the couple has chosen who they want to share their special day with and it is their right to do so.

2. Can I still send a gift if I am not invited to the wedding?

Yes, it is appropriate to send a gift even if you are not invited to the wedding. This is a kind gesture to show your support and love for the couple. Choose a gift from their registry or something thoughtful and personal that you know they would appreciate.

3. Is it okay to ask the couple if I can attend the wedding even though I wasn't invited?

No, it is not okay to ask the couple if you can attend the wedding if you were not invited. This puts the couple in an uncomfortable position and may make them feel obligated to invite you. It is best to respect their decision and not put them in this situation.

4. Should I reach out to the couple after the wedding if I was not invited?

It is not necessary to reach out to the couple after the wedding if you were not invited. If you have a close relationship with the couple, you may send a congratulatory message or card, but it is not required. The couple may be busy with post-wedding tasks and it is important to respect their time and space.

5. What if I am invited to a pre-wedding event but not the actual wedding?

If you are invited to a pre-wedding event, such as a bridal shower or engagement party, but not the actual wedding, it is best to attend the event and show your support for the couple. However, do not assume that you are also invited to the wedding. It is important to wait for a formal invitation to the wedding before making any assumptions or plans to attend.

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