Upset about a Friend's Success with Another Consultant

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Discussion Overview

This thread explores the feelings of one participant regarding a friend's success with another consultant, highlighting emotions of frustration and hurt over perceived unfairness in sales performance between catalog and cooking shows.

Discussion Character

  • Opinion-based
  • Anecdotal
  • Debate/contested

Main Points Raised

  • One participant expresses anger and hurt over a friend's success with another consultant, feeling that it undermines their own efforts.
  • Another participant acknowledges the logic behind choosing a local consultant for cooking shows, noting that it makes sense for the friend.
  • One participant shares their experience of moving away and being unable to maintain regular cooking shows with past hosts, suggesting distance impacts show success.
  • Several users mention the significant difference in sales potential between cooking shows and catalog shows, with one stating that the consultant does the work for the higher sales.
  • Another participant reflects on their own feelings of disappointment when a close friend booked a show with another consultant, noting the effectiveness of that consultant.
  • One participant suggests that the friend’s success could be attributed to the scarcity of consultants in Alaska, leading to higher sales when shows are held.
  • Another participant highlights the importance of being realistic about the distance and the nature of the shows, encouraging a positive outlook on the friend's success.
  • One participant shares that the friend might consider becoming a consultant herself, indicating a potential opportunity for growth.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ among participants regarding feelings of hurt and fairness, with some understanding the rationale behind the friend's choices while others empathize with the original poster's frustration. No clear consensus emerges on the emotional response to the situation.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects personal experiences and emotions related to the dynamics of consultant relationships and the impact of geographical distance on business opportunities.

Who May Find This Useful

Consultants navigating similar feelings of competition and friendship dynamics within their business relationships may find this discussion relevant.

abrahamlaur
abrahamlaur
Messages
511
I dont know if this is where i should post this ... but i am sooo mad!

i have a friend that lives in alaska and shes been doing catalog shows for me since i started the business a year ago. well i just found out that she had a cooking show in feb with a consultant up there and got a 900 dollar show!!!!!!

i understand you get more sales from cooking shows, but COME ON!!! shes been with me for a year and now shes doing shows for another consultant, booking off of her, having people book of her ... it just doesnt seem fair at all!!! i'm SOOOO hurt! :confused:

and now that shes doing a catalog show for me now ... shes struggling to get 150 in sales! why is it that i have the hardest time getting sales and then she goes and does 900 dollars with another consultant!
 
Aww, Laurie, I'm sorry. <<<Big hug!>>>She shouldn't be struggling to reach $150 for you. However, I can't say I blame her for choosing a local consultant for a live show and her friends' bookings. I have family that lives out of state. They have local consultants. It just makes sense.
 
Laurie,

I understand your frustration. I moved from KY to GA 3 yrs ago. I'm too far away to pop back up and do cooking shows with my past hosts. I've done a few but can't do it on a regular basis. Alaska is even farther!! I'd be more upset if she did a CATALOG show with another consultant. :eek:
 
  • Thread starter
  • #4
i know that it makes sence for her to have a cooking show with another consultant, and she originally booked off of a friends show so she could get the next months host special. i understand that .. but for her to do $900 dollars in sales??!! all of the cooking shows i've done with her have been like 150 ... its like she doesnt try with me, but with this other lady she just went all out ya know? it just really hurts
 
Cooking shows vs Catalog shows are VERY VERY different.

Your friend didn't do the work, the consultant did.
 
I do understand your hurt feelings, though. It seems like your friend let you down a bit.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #7
yeah ... i dont know, maybe i would feel so hurt if my sales were up that high .. she just never told me, i had to find out from looking up her host discount number
 
Again, I'd be hurt by that. Do you feel comfortable talking with her about it?
 
It wasn't me, LMAO!!!
 
Gotta admit, the question did cross my mind. (Though I'm sure you would never intentionally poach a fellow consultant's host.)
 
gilliandanielle said:
It wasn't me, LMAO!!!
Click to expand...

uhh huuh, Sure Gillian....and you probably recruited her too, didn't ya? 'Fess up, girl!
 
I had a whopping $284 in sales in Feb and 0 recruits- I would have killed for double points on a $900 show!!
 
It could be that her sales were better here in Alaska because we are so deprived of good shopping, at least I know in my small town we are!!

Sheryl
 
It has to hurt that she didn't tell you. I just had a very close friend in my neighborhood, that went to a Power Cooking show she was invited to by some other neighbor.

She booked a show off her and bought $100 in products. She was just going to go just to check out the power cooking, but the consultant was VERY effective. Her shows average $1000. I was very hurt that she booked a show through her. But she really wanted for me to go and get some tips for my own shows.

Some consultants just have a special knack with people. This one I think, used to be in high power sales before becoming a consultant. I decided that instead of feeling bad about it, I would work on finding my own knack.

The fact that she was able to have a cooking show and invite people was effective in the high sales. I have people in other states trying to do catalog shows, but it's hard sometimes when you can't be there to direct them.
 
I know she is your friend and has been doing some great favors for you by having catalog shows for you. That she did a cooking show AND is doing another catalog show for you SHOWS that she is your friend.But you need to be realistic, she lives almost 2,000 miles from you. Hosts generally get tons more free stuff when they had a cooking show than doing catalog shows. Be happy for her that she got all that free stuff!! If she had signed under that other consultant, then I would be hurt, but she lives really far away from you.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #16
Actually I found out last night that the consultant she did it under moved from the area. There arent alot of consultants there so when they do have parties, everyone wants to buy stuff. When I found out the consultant moved I told her she should sign up to be a consultant so she can get all of those shows. She said if i sent her some information on it, she would consider it.
 
abrahamlaur said:
Actually I found out last night that the consultant she did it under moved from the area. There arent alot of consultants there so when they do have parties, everyone wants to buy stuff. When I found out the consultant moved I told her she should sign up to be a consultant so she can get all of those shows. She said if i sent her some information on it, she would consider it.
Click to expand...

Now that's taking lemons and making lemonade! Good luck on your recruiting effort with her!

Lisa
 
There's that silver lining!
 
Good luck on a possible new recruit. At that size show she could simply do one show every other month, stay more than active, and on months where we have incentives hold a couple catalog shows or do a few shows instead of 1 every 2 months, and bring in an income.
 
I understand your frustration but I'm glad something positive came out of this. Good luck on the lead!
 
Hey - depending on where she lives, maybe Gillian could be her hospitality director! just a thought.
 

Frequently Asked Questions

Why do I feel upset about my friend's success with another consultant?

It's natural to feel a mix of emotions when someone close to you achieves success, especially if you are in the same industry. You might feel jealousy, insecurity, or even fear of competition. Acknowledge these feelings but try to focus on your own goals and achievements instead.

How can I support my friend despite my feelings?

Supporting your friend can help you process your feelings and strengthen your relationship. Congratulate them on their success, ask about their journey, and express genuine interest in their achievements. This can help shift your focus from competition to collaboration.

What if I feel like I'm not doing well in my own business?

It's important to remember that everyone has their own path and timeline for success. Reflect on your own goals and progress, and consider setting new targets for yourself. Seek mentorship or training to improve your skills and boost your confidence in your business.

Should I confront my friend about their success?

Confrontation may not be the best approach, as it could lead to misunderstandings or hurt feelings. Instead, try to have an open and honest conversation where you can express your feelings without placing blame. Focus on building a supportive dialogue rather than creating conflict.

How can I turn my feelings of upset into motivation?

Use your feelings as a catalyst for growth. Analyze what specifically bothers you about your friend's success and identify areas where you can improve. Set new goals, learn from their strategies, and channel your emotions into productive actions that will help you advance in your own business.

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