Well- One Door Was Closed... (Update)

[Kitchen Diva]

Hi guys!

I got word back from Cal Farley Organization in Texas and they won't allow house parents to have more than 2 small dogs. We have two large dogs and a kitten. I'd be willing to find a loving home for the kitten (even though she'd be so sad without her puppies) but Spirit and Delaney have been instrumental in playing a part of my niece's healing process since she's come to live here.

She tells them they are her best friends and she loves them. She lays on their belly's to watch TV- plays doctor, dress-up and beauty salon with them. Anyway, so that door for at least that facility has been closed.

Not sure if it is just a temporary close or a for sure close, but it isn't the right one.

I wanted to share that news with you, and ask so kindly if you would please still keep DH (John) and I in your prayers. We believe this is the direction that we are supposed to go in- but obviously the timing and open doors must come from God.

Thanks for the prayers everyone! I'm very thankful for them!

 

[chefmeg]

Are you still looking into the one in North Carolina?

 

[BethCooks4U]

There'll be another! There's a reason this wasn't right. Keeping you in my prayers.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Are you still looking into the one in North Carolina?

No- but the lady from Cal Farley gave me a website to look into other places in the US that need houseparents and that allow more pets. There are several others in NC- after I'm finished doing my laundry, I'll look through the website and write down the ones that look like a match.

 

[BethCooks4U]

No- but the lady from Cal Farley gave me a website to look into other places in the US that need houseparents and that allow more pets. There are several others in NC- after I'm finished doing my laundry, I'll look through the website and write down the ones that look like a match.

See... that's why! You are meant to be in NC closer to me!

 

[chefmeg]

and me!!! I am only a road-trip away!!

Really, kasey...this plan will work when and where God plans for it to!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

and me!!! I am only a road-trip away!!

Really, kasey...this plan will work when and where God plans for it to!

Oh, I know. I'm happy for the closed door, but it's a bittersweet thing, because that means I'm no closer to a job and a solution than I was before. At least before the door was closed, I at least felt like I was a step closer, ya know?

There are several places that need houseparents- so I'll keep looking...

 

[chefmeg]

did I tell you about the profound words my DH came out with a few weeks back???....I told him about the saying "God never closes a door without opening a window" and then I had heard "it is the wait in the hall that is difficult"....well, he says "the wait in the hall is FAITH....why would you make it difficult when you know God is going to take you where He wants?"

JAW DROPPING MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!! Keep the faith, girl, and it will all work out!

 

[chefann]

Kacey, don't think of it as a door being closed - it's one less wrong door that's available. You're one step closer to finding the right door for you and DH.

 

[merego]

Everything happens for a reason, I truly beleive that and that right door will happen for you, maybe in cincy so you can be closer to your long lost sister

 

[ChefBeckyD]

Kacey, don't think of it as a door being closed - it's one less wrong door that's available. You're one step closer to finding the right door for you and DH.

It's like the 100 No's theory - every NO gets you closer to a YES!

There are just too many things pointing you in the direction of this career - I think God is just narrowing the field for you! You, John, and the 4 legged kids are a complete package for helping to heal the wounds of a house full of kids somewhere!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

It's like the 100 No's theory - every NO gets you closer to a YES!

There are just too many things pointing you in the direction of this career - I think God is just narrowing the field for you! You, John, and the 4 legged kids are a complete package for helping to heal the wounds of a house full of kids somewhere!

Thanks Becky!

I agree also with you Chefann- I know that it isn't so much a door closed as it is a no to that particular place- and it is still a step in the right direction, but for some reason I was just hoping that it would be like "Oh my gosh, we've been waiting for awesome people like you with 2 dogs and a drama cat to come and rescue hurting children" Either I need to grow up or come back down to earth a little.

I'm so used to having favor with people, and for little miracles happening in my life that this long stream of trials and no's is sort of morale breaking stuff.

The hallway of faith is so true! And, our minds and thoughts do make things harder than they need to be.

DH and I are going to get out on the bike either tomorrow or Friday- maybe some fresh, pollenated air will do my mind good. There is nothing worse than a family having to sit at home and look for work while another family is living with you. I know the dogs love the company- but there isn't enough room for all of us to be unemployed! LOL

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Feel free to send your thoughts to Cal Farley's organization in Texas- I understand why they have rules about pets, but they'd be living in our apartment, and in my opinion, large dogs are no more trouble than little dogs, and for the most part are a little calmer and not as barky- but that's just me. I'm just sad that they wouldn't make an exception for little ol' me! Maybe if I sent them a picture, showing them how cute we all are?!?!?!

 

[janetupnorth]

Just got online - busy day! I too agree that God has something planned, you are just in the PROCESS of figuring it out. It may be houseparents, but it may be somewhere else or it may be something else that this is the step to. Keep trusting praying and looking.Read the bold part in my signature - it is bolded always for a reason. You will find the answer, in God's timing...

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Thanks, Miss Janet!

 

[vwpamperedchef]

I will continue to pray for God to provide guidance to you and DH!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Thanks Miss Vanessa! How is your DH doing?

 

[vwpamperedchef]

Thanks Miss Vanessa! How is your DH doing?

Working hard, as usual. He'll be home again this weekend, but then traveling on business June 2-16. Looking forward to our vacation to who knows where in July after his cousin's Baltimore wedding...Thanks for asking.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Working hard, as usual. He'll be home again this weekend, but then traveling on business June 2-16. Looking forward to our vacation to who knows where in July after his cousin's Baltimore wedding...Thanks for asking.

I'm glad he is doing well. I've been keeping you two in my prayers. You will like Baltimore! It's muggy there in July, but the city is quite pretty!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

I just sent off some emails to other "camps" around the USA for more info. I'll keep you updated.

 

[quiverfull7]

I'm sorry about Texas but I just KNOW that GOD has something better planned! Not just different, MUCH GREATER! And when HE reveals it, it's
going to bless the socks right off your cute little ole feet!!!!!!

 

[raebates]

Disappointments are always, well, disappointing, even when we know what we were hoping for wasn't the best choice. I'll keep praying.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Thanks Rae and Diane. You said it very eloquently. Disappointments are always disappointing- even when we are praying for the right doors to swing wide open and the wrong ones to slam shut.

I guess it's because I've wanted to be a foster mom since I can remember, and DH really never wanted anything to do with kids. Well DH has been learning a lot about himself, and has realized that he went through his abuisive childhood for a reason.

I believe that having my niece here has helped him realize that he has a heart for kids that have gone through abuse and neglect...so now that God has helped DH realize that, and I've already known this is something I want to do, it's nice to be on the same page as my DH!

I asked DH to consider becoming a foster parent. It would be good experience to start our ministry.

 

[raebates]

Just remember, Kacey, that God is never late. He's also never early. His timing will be perfect. I'll be praying.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Thanks Miss Rae- you are like a virtual HUG to me!

 

[raebates]

I'm so glad. I look forward to one day giving you a real <<<hug.>>>

 

[janetupnorth]

Who knows? Maybe this realization will help open the doors to have some of your own? You never know?!?!?!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

I'm so glad. I look forward to one day giving you a real <<<hug.>>>

I look forward to that day, too! (PS- check you PM box)

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Who knows? Maybe this realization will help open the doors to have some of your own? You never know?!?!?!

That would be cool- It would be a medical miracle! DH doesn't have little soliders (well any that make it down the canal anyway) and supposedly my ovaries shut down years ago, hence the hormone treatment I'm on....

 

[janetupnorth]

That would be cool- It would be a medical miracle! DH doesn't have little soliders (well any that make it down the canal anyway) and supposedly my ovaries shut down years ago, hence the hormone treatment I'm on....

Well, ya never know...miracles are known to happen.

I wish I could share my fertility with you...had to get DH fixed, I could look at him and get pregnant! Yup...protection couldn't even stop that! If he wasn't fixed I'd have more kids than Diane!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Well, ya never know...miracles are known to happen.

I wish I could share my fertility with you...had to get DH fixed, I could look at him and get pregnant! Yup...protection couldn't even stop that! If he wasn't fixed I'd have more kids than Diane!

I haven't told many people this, but before my stepson (Josh) went over to Iraq, God told me He was going to give me a son. Then back in December of last year I thought I was pregnant. I had every symptom but a positive pregnancy test. I worked with people that were pregnant and couldn't get a positive test until they were 3 or 4 months along, so I just figured because of my hormonal imbalance- I wasn't testing positive.

I was having morning sickness- I was exhausted, I'd come home from work, make supper and go to bed by 6:00 and wake up at 6:00 the next morning even more exhausted. I had cravings, and quite a bit made me queasy- especially smells. I even had physical changes as well.

During this time I had a dream where God told me I was going to have a son and his name was to be Matthew, which meant gift from God- and I had a couple other dreams a couple nights in a row- all pertaining to little Matthew.

Imagine my surprise when someone who had never been more than 3 days off on her cycle went almost 90 days with no period and then got it one day out of the blue.

I was sad- but had my niece and sister to worry about, so I didn't focus on it. Since then my cycles come when they want, and my hormone doctor said that the progesterone therapy is working and I will eventually only have 3-4 periods a year. That narrows down my chances for miracle conception- so when I want a cycle, I just stop taking my progesterone for a few days (dr said that was fine) but then that increases my estrogen, which I already have too much of, and I get cranky and pyscho, and blah and gloomy....

I'm pretty sure pregnancy hormones would be easier to deal with!

Anyway, so I'm waiting for my Matthew- but in the meantime I want to be there for kids waiting for parents!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Are any of you foster parents?Are any of you fellow cheffers Foster Parents? If so- how do you like that?

I might go on a fact finding mission about that to see what all of that would entail... but it's nice to have people I can talk to about it as well.

 

[janetupnorth]

I have a friend who only has periods 3-4 times per year - MAXIMUM! She ended up with 3 kids!They stopped after that because of many other pregnancy-related issues. Basically, 2 of her 3 kids were life-flighted out and if she has any more pregnancies she is now at risk of dying due to blood-related issues.But, she has 3 wonderful kids (the ones I had over for a day about a week ago).I hope little Matthew comes someday and we can celebrate with you!Or if it is a girl you can name her after me...it means God is Gracious......of course I wouldn't torture a child and name them Janet...it's kind of a dead name nowadays...

 

[Kitchen Diva]

I have a friend who only has periods 3-4 times per year - MAXIMUM! She ended up with 3 kids!

They stopped after that because of many other pregnancy-related issues. Basically, 2 of her 3 kids were life-flighted out and if she has any more pregnancies she is now at risk of dying due to blood-related issues.

But, she has 3 wonderful kids (the ones I had over for a day about a week ago).

I hope little Matthew comes someday and we can celebrate with you!


Or if it is a girl you can name her after me...it means God is Gracious...

...of course I wouldn't torture a child and name them Janet...it's kind of a dead name nowadays...

My mother's name is Janet. And for reasons I'd rather not get into on here I won't be naming her after my Mom. If it is a girl her name would be Leah Corrine (pronounced Cah + rin) Or Emily Kristine

 

[janetupnorth]

My mother's name is Janet. And for reasons I'd rather not get into on here I won't be naming her after my Mom. If it is a girl her name would be Leah Corrine (pronounced Cah + rin) Or Emily Kristine

Oh my...too funny...don't hold it against me please!

I like Emily Kristine...

I have a Samantha Ruth and Kyle would have been Alyssa Sue...then we realized that with a last name beginning with "S" we'd better change that and the option was Alyssa Marie.

But he was a boy anyway so that made it easy!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Oh my...too funny...don't hold it against me please!

I like Emily Kristine...

I have a Samantha Ruth and Kyle would have been Alyssa Sue...then we realized that with a last name beginning with "S" we'd better change that and the option was Alyssa Marie.

But he was a boy anyway so that made it easy!

I don't hold it against you at all! It is a nice name, just not the right one for my little girl.

we have such a long last name, that short simple names work best so that we don't stress out our potential children while learning to spell.

It wasn't until recently that I started to like the name Leah. I like strong, yet feminine names for girls. Emily isn't a strong name, but the name fits exactly what my little girl might look like- which is too cute for words! L O N G eyelashes, her daddy's olive toned skin, and her mommy's dark curly hair and the prettiest bluegreen eyes...

But that's in the future, so I digress....

I need a snack- all this typing makes me hungry!

 

[janetupnorth]

Well, I need sleep - full day tomorrow - tomorrow night I need to prep for a craft fair Saturday (set-up Friday night). DD finishes 1st grade Friday - lots of exciting stuff!Good night!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Well, I need sleep - full day tomorrow - tomorrow night I need to prep for a craft fair Saturday (set-up Friday night). DD finishes 1st grade Friday - lots of exciting stuff!

Good night!

Congrats to Sammie- get some rest, talk to you tomorrow!

 

[Intrepid_Chef]

Kacey, hugs to you! I'll pray that God opens the door for a great opportunity for you.

And your post about the hormone levels made me think ... have you ever been tested for PCOS? The reason I'm asking is that I have it, and my prime symptom was skipping periods. It is a nasty little disorder that can throw your whole system out of wack, and is the leading cause of female infertility. I take meds that diabetics take and it has curbed this symptom. I was so thrilled when my doc told me I could stop taking hormone pills for this problem!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

I wish it was only PCOS!

Kacey, hugs to you! I'll pray that God opens the door for a great opportunity for you.

And your post about the hormone levels made me think ... have you ever been tested for PCOS? The reason I'm asking is that I have it, and my prime symptom was skipping periods. It is a nasty little disorder that can throw your whole system out of wack, and is the leading cause of female infertility. I take meds that diabetics take and it has curbed this symptom. I was so thrilled when my doc told me I could stop taking hormone pills for this problem!

Yes, I have been tested, and the skipped periods just recently started. My hormone doctor said that was the result he was going for, as it is the only thing to keep my unhealthy excess of estrogen from taking over my body. I just forgot that he had told me that- after all it took almost 18 months of taking progesterone topically and orally AND taking topical testosterone for it to happen (the skipped periods)


Here is the SHORT version of what happened. I had a right out of medical school doctor when DH was in the Air Force. This Ob/GYN thought it would be wise to induce menopause in me (I was only 26 at the time) for 6 months. The FDA only allows medically induced menopause therapy for 6 months because of the negative side effects. My doctor failed to tell me that one of the side effects was that with shutting my ovaries down- they may NEVER start back up again. They were also supposed to run extensive hormone tests on me first, to ensure I was the correct candidate for that drastic of a treatment to help with my severe endoemtriosis.

Well, they didn't do that, nor did they tell me of the side effects, which also included hormonal imbalances, sleep issues, headaches, weight gain, memory issues, and skeletal problems brought on by my young body thinking it was going through menopause for 6 months when I was only 26.

Fast forward to about 7 years ago- I wasn't sleeping, my hair was falling out, I was bruising, my body hurt to touch it ANY where, I was an emotional mess and I knew I was off balance but could not get a doctor to listen to me- they just said that I was depressed and gave me pills. Then I injured my back about 3-4 years ago (sadly I am not so good with some memories because between what the fake menopause did to me and the side effects from 2 years of narcotics I just don't remember some things) I started to take prescribed narcotics.

I had a total of 7 doctors in three years, all prescribing several narcotics, muscle relaxants and PREDNISONE- had they bothered to listen to me and test my hormones, and NOT my thyroid and had they bothered to accept that maybe, just maybe even though I fell in the "normal" range in some of the tests that normal for others wasn't normal for me? I mean I went from about 150 pounds to 190 pounds in less than 8 weeks, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't speak in coherant sentences, I was having trouble hearing and writing- I coudln't think straight, my vision was getting blurry, I was suffering from horrid headaches, my periods were so long and heavy I thought I was bleeding to death (and they were always on time) add to all that my extreme back pain and for a short time I was unable to walk without any assistance at all....


Finally about 2 years ago I read a book by Doctor Schwarzbein. I believe her name is Diana. After reading that book I was CONVINCED that I had burnt out adreanals, and that I had Addisons disease and that I also was insulin resistant and also had a severe hormonal imbalance.

Through what I can only describe as a miracle- I found someone who had TRAINED with this doctor and she referred me to my now hormone doctor. He said that he was amazed that I had held up as long as I had, and was also amazed that I hadn't let the doctors convince me to take sleeping pills, cholesterol med's and anti-depressants.

Blood tests showed that my body had completely stopped producing Testosterone on it's own. In fact they had to run a $1500.00 blood test just to find traces of it. A normal human being has traces of it in their system in the 60's to 80's range...mine was at a FOUR! you read right a 4!

My progesterone levels were almost non-extinct- they found that my system had stopped producing cortisol, my insulin was so out of control that my cholesterol was off the charts, and my blood vessels showed they were very damaged. I was boarderline with Addisons and had I not found Dr. Lyle when I did, he very well believes I would have had a major heart attack within one year. My system was shutting down piece by piece, and 7 flipping specialists in 3 years could only muster enough empathy for me to prescibe me PROZAC and send me to weight watchers- Funnily enough it was WW that almost killed me! That's when I found Deb, who sent me to Dr. Lyle.

So I can happily say I now have growing finger nails, I only lose about 50 hairs per day, that I can see, versus clumps, I sleep better, thanks to the progesterone- I'm down to about 175 pounds, and could be less, but the stress keeps it on- I can think clearly, I still have memory issues from all the narcotics and from the lack of needed hormones- but Dr. Lyle thinks that will improve with time. He said it was nothing short of a miracle that I was able to function for as long as I did having gone through what my body was going through... in short my ovaries never kicked back on, so although I'm fertile, I'm sterile.

There are certain other things that stopped functioning that he mentioned, that I forgot about- but the good news is that my insulin is under control with a high protein diet- and my hormones levels are improving SLOWLY with the daily doses of a hormone therapy made especially for me through a compound pharmacy-

I have since had to go to regular doctors for other things in the past 2 years and I have gotten scolded and belittled by doctors who keep referring to past tests and tell me nothing is wrong and I should not be on these hormones. And I smile and tell them, we aren't here to talk about my hormones, and because of small minded doctors like you- I can't have children, AND I'd be dead had I decided to keep listening to your kind and believe that nothing was wrong with me.


So- I don't have PCOS- I've been tested. I had blood vessel disease, SEVERE Androgen Deficiency, severe hormonal deficiency, I was one symptom away from Addison's disease, I have insulin resistance, I'm sterile, I don't have working ovaries, my body doesn't make hormones on it's own any more- I need to take them to live a normal life, my ovaries shut down, and I had severe burnt out adreanals.


Some days I wish it was as simple as PCOS- but it isn't- The cool thing is that My God is bigger than all that crap I just wrote about, and in the bible IT IS WRITTEN- that by HIS stripes we WERE healed- so I believe I am healed from all those issues... my body just needs to catch up to my faith!

Sorry this was so long- but it really is the shortest version I could come up with!

 

[smspamperedchef]

All, I can say is WOW! Kacey! I'm so glad though that you have found someone to help you and you're on your way to a decent recovery.

 

[janetupnorth]

Kacey -

Funny thing this a.m. Sammie was talking to me on the way to school about the fact that her devotion was going to be about Job this morning. I immediately thought, great story, reminds me of Kacey's struggles. Not at all having read about what you just typed about all your medical problems. Now that I read it, it fits even more!

Here is what came to mind about the story BEFORE reading all your trials:

1. God doesn't cause the harsh circumstances, He just allows Satan to tempt and try us. He is still there, still sovereign and still uses those circumstances for a greater good in our lives.

2. We are not on earth to "have a good time". God blesses us and gives us things, but we already threw away his gifts when we first sinned and don't deserve anything. So each and every thing we are given is truly a blessing. Our time on earth is really an earthly battle - when we get to heaven we get to celebrate!

3. Satan's whole premise in job was that man only serves God because God protects him. God let that protection be let loose to prove that man can CHOOSE to serve God among a sea of trials. By having strong faith through our adversity, by allowing ourselves to be broken and release our comforts and realize we don't deserve anything, we have put ourselves in a position to allow God to use us in ways he couldn't before our trials happened.

4. Justice in life doesn't always occur in our timeline...it occurs in the timeline of eternity. We may see people "getting away with bad things" when we think it should already be corrected. But rest assured, the time will come. ...and we need to remember...God is patient and forgiving and sin is sin. Someone else's stealing is as bad as my jealousy or not serving my spouse. If God can forgive me, why not them? God is working all things together for good for those who love Him and we have to trust in His infinite wisdom and justice versus our finite view.

I know you know that and not all specifically relates to you personally, they were things that came to MY mind as reminders and lessons. But read Job again when you can and be encouraged that obviously Satan sees something good worth attacking and stay strong and wait for God's wonderful blessings!

 

[Intrepid_Chef]

Oh my, you have really been through the mill! I am so glad you have qualified doctors helping you now!

I call PCOS "the syndrome with 6 names" because there are other names for various parts of it that I use interchangably ... Insulin Resistance, Syndrome X, Syndrome W, Metabolic Syndrome and Pre-Diabetes.

My endo asked me if I had a regular doctor and I said NO! I would get one if I had bronchitis or something .. but meanwhile, I don't want some other doctor giving me a hard time over taking Metformin.

Sorry to hijack your thread ... I was just saying all that to say that many endocrine issues are not well understood by anybody who is not a specialist.

To get back on track ... I am not a foster parent. But there are foster parents in my church, including two that have gone foster-to-adopt. One is a single woman who has adopted 2 children and plans to eventually adopt all 4. She is like the woman who had no children who is now mother to many.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Oh my, you have really been through the mill! I am so glad you have qualified doctors helping you now!

I call PCOS "the syndrome with 6 names" because there are other names for various parts of it that I use interchangably ... Insulin Resistance, Syndrome X, Syndrome W, Metabolic Syndrome and Pre-Diabetes.

My endo asked me if I had a regular doctor and I said NO! I would get one if I had bronchitis or something .. but meanwhile, I don't want some other doctor giving me a hard time over taking Metformin.

Sorry to hijack your thread ... I was just saying all that to say that many endocrine issues are not well understood by anybody who is not a specialist.

To get back on track ... I am not a foster parent. But there are foster parents in my church, including two that have gone foster-to-adopt. One is a single woman who has adopted 2 children and plans to eventually adopt all 4. She is like the woman who had no children who is now mother to many.

Hi Di, I don't mind that you hijacked my thread- I'm sure I've hijacked my own threads and I know I hijack other's and even hijack the hijacks!

I will talk to Dr. Lyle about PCOS- but I'm fairly certain he ruled that out right away. The doctor I see now is a born again christian- and he knows better than to give me a hard time for my hormone therapy- He has seen my weight improve, and other physicaly things change, so he knows it is working even if it isn't what he would have chosen for me.

I will ask him about it again, it can't hurt!

Thanks for the info on the foster moms- I should see if I can find any in my area- oh wait- I have just the perfect person to speak to. She attends the church we go to on occassion, and she is the mother of one of my sister's good friends from youth group from the church we grew up in...she still does foster care with her hubby- I'm going to have to call her and pay her a visit!