Oddest Experience at a Demo Show: Submission and Permission Needed

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Discussion Overview

This thread explores participants' experiences and perspectives regarding a recent demo show where discussions about submission and permission in relationships arose. Participants share their reactions to the dynamics observed during the show and reflect on their own views about decision-making in their households.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based
  • Debate/contested

Main Points Raised

  • One participant describes a demo show where the hostess and guests discussed submission to husbands, which they found surprising and odd.
  • Another participant shares their experience of feeling protective over catalogs due to low inventory and the request for permission from husbands to order.
  • Several participants express disbelief at the notion of needing permission for purchases, with some stating they do not subscribe to the idea of submission in their relationships.
  • One participant mentions that while they do not consider themselves submissive, they discuss larger purchases with their spouse out of respect.
  • Another participant reflects on the religious context of submission, noting that their relationship involves mutual respect and discussion rather than strict control.
  • Some participants share that they find it challenging to understand the dynamics of relationships where permission is required for spending, suggesting it may stem from financial constraints.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ significantly among participants regarding the concept of submission and the need for permission in financial decisions. Some participants reject the idea entirely, while others express a more nuanced understanding based on their personal experiences.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects a range of personal experiences and cultural backgrounds, highlighting how individual beliefs about relationships and financial decision-making can vary widely within the community.

Who May Find This Useful

Participants in the consultant community who are interested in understanding diverse perspectives on relationship dynamics and decision-making processes may find this discussion relevant.

WOW After reading this post my jaw drops! Especially when the Bible is brought into it. I believe in God,Jesus & his teachings BUT I do not agree that the man is the head of the household! What about if the man isn't working & woman is! Reguardless I believe God made Woman to be FREEthinking individuals not to bow down or OBEY their husband thats CRAZY! So why doesn;t the Man OBEY his wife or BOW down when we are the source of life! We bring life into this world-Man cannot!!! I dont want to get in a religious battle here I'm just saying this is crazy! I believe in RESPECT & 50/50! I know those who quoted the bible will say my husband respects me & i respect God. Well I think it should be 50/50 in the household. I believe in discussing TOGETHER big purchase decisions but not deciding on the husbands choice cause he is man! That makes me laugh & be glad I am a strong woman who will not feel stupid or infererior just cause he is the mane of the househould.. And I believe when you stand before God when you die YOU, YOURSELF are responsible for YOUR OWN actions not that of your family.. thats crazy.Anyone agree?!!
 
I am in total agreement with Debbie and Janetupnorth!
I love being submissive to my husband! It's not always easy, but I know I am fulfilling my role before God, that I am a submissive, respectful, loving wife, just as he is fulfilling his role in leading our family and house with Godliness and love.
Everyone is diffrent and everyone has diffrent ideas of submission. I belive in the biblical one, cause that is what I live my life by.
My husband is loving and caring and a very Godly man and even though we don't always agree, I know he has mine and our families best interst at heart always.
I know my husband feels loved and respected by me because of my submission (like I said, its not always easy though!)

On another note, I remember being 20 years old and not having 2 dimes to rub together and having to make sure I had $5 to spend! Thank God, thats not the case anymore!

I say lets respect each other's beliefs!
 
maryhenderlite said:
OH my, what a thread. Where is Kitchen Guy, we need his comment to lighten this up!!

I will just say that when me and my hubby made our vowels, we did not include the "obey" part. That being said, we have a 50-50 relationship (give or take at times). If there is a major purchase we discuss it, he is a truck driver, and only home every other weekend (lucky if that often) and makes most of our money. I do ask about things he buys, not to be nosey, but to make sure that he was in that town, truck stop, or restaurtant recently. He has no clue normally what I buy. He never asks but I do not take advantage. As long as I have paid all the bills, fed the family, taken care of all the little things, he doesn't ask any questions.

I do not feel that either one of us is in submission to the other one, I feel we are teaching our children how to be respectful and value each other equally. If that is wrong in God's eyes, well then my husband and I will be answering to him when the time comes, as will everyone else.

I do believe to each his own, and try to respect that.

Ok I am getting down from my soapbox.



THANK YOU SOOO MUCH FOR POSTING THIS!! I JUST CANNOT BELIEVE SOME OF THE POSTS ON HERE SAYING HE IS HEAD OF HOUSE & I SHOULD OBEY & WE GO WITH HIS DECISION BLABLABLABLABLA! CRAZY!!! BE STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN HERE LADIES EVEN IF YOU ARE MARRIED! WE ARE FREE WILLING & GOD WILL JUST US FOR OUR OWN CHOICES NOT OUR HUSBANDS FOR THE FAMILY!!!!
 
I think it's time we drop this whole thread. I was always taught there are two things yuo just DON'T discuss casually - politics and religion.
I may or may not agree with any and all sides in this discussion and I think it is a beautiful thing that there are SO many sides to it and so many differing views - that's what makes us a wonderful community here on CS...we are different - but we are all the same. So, how about those who submit, be happy with submitting to your DH's and not feel the need to defend your stance...and those who choose not to be submissive, enjoy being independent...but not judge those who prefer to live their lives differently. We all love ourselves, our families, our businesses and each other...so let's drop the religion talk and JUST GET ALONG!!!


GROUP HUG!
 
I have no desire to be independent of my husband. Thats my choice. I am happy with it. I am a strong, free willed woman and I CHOOSE to be submissive to my husband.

I think we need to respect what other people believe and not say its weird or crazy.
 
Here's a suggestion for stopping the "I've got to go home and ask" in the future. . .close the show that night. Some of you have had the opportunity to hear Julie Weitz speak (she really got me feeling motivated again). She feels that closing that night is very important. This is not a step them I ready to to take but it is something for all of us to consider.

She feels it honors those people who took the time and made the effort to attend the show (they'll get their products faster). This approach is done with much host coaching (including the host having his/her shopping/wish list completed so s/he is ready that night to place an order). Also, the information is relayed to everyone who is invited.

Okay, let's get off the politics and religion conversation. I'm with you Carolyn, I don't think these are things that that should be disussed here! (Because I'm a bleeding heart liberal :))
 
For those taking offense, none of us intended that, just pointing out how we definie "submission" vs. the harsh negativity of the term in today's society. If you ask anyone who knows me you'd understand me. I am VERY strong-willed, independent...finished 2 college degrees before I got married, finished a Master's Degree this past August after 2 kids...background in engineering so I bring in the income while my husband works for practically nothing as a missionary...he just finally finished an Associate's Degree in December. He has no qualms about me making the money, being strong-willed, etc., because of how we are. I do not "bow down" to my husband, do any housework because he makes me, etc. He'd laugh at that concept and say "yeah right", but I do respect him and his spiritual role and try to support him to fulfill that in our household.

Until the last few comments, I didn't think there was any fight or disagreement going - just people saying what their situations are and how they view the party this consultant had and how we view submission vs. how it came across to her from her guests.
 
...just had to add one more time...we (some of us here) view submission as the selflessness in our marriage relationship. God asks us to do that, but also not to a husband who is not serving God. He commands the husbands to love us knowing that if that wasn't given in return it would be a power/control thing which is not how the marriage relationship was intended. For those who get "scared" off by the word submission or worked up, I would challenge them to study the Bible and see how it is intended. As Rebecca said, it is a choice to be "submissive" and for others, it is separate from any political views. It is a spiritual submission... OK, thoughts done for now...

...back to my laundry. ;) (That is because I don't want pink underwear and shrunken clothes!)
 
dannyzmom said:
I think it's time we drop this whole thread. I was always taught there are two things yuo just DON'T discuss casually - politics and religion.
I may or may not agree with any and all sides in this discussion and I think it is a beautiful thing that there are SO many sides to it and so many differing views - that's what makes us a wonderful community here on CS...we are different - but we are all the same. So, how about those who submit, be happy with submitting to your DH's and not feel the need to defend your stance...and those who choose not to be submissive, enjoy being independent...but not judge those who prefer to live their lives differently. We all love ourselves, our families, our businesses and each other...so let's drop the religion talk and JUST GET ALONG!!!


GROUP HUG!

Here! Here!! Yeah for Carolyn!!! I'm with you!
 
Had this occurred to anyone...

Perhaps those who checked-in with their hubbys before purchasing would rather host a show for the benefits. So, they wanted to go home and sell the idea to their hubbys before committing to a purchase or a show with the consultant.

I mean how many times have we done something only to realize later that if it was done differently we would have save hundreds of dollars?

In my case, I was looking to do a major purchase. Did not have the $ that night. Looked over the host benefits. Then started reading about the business. Talked it over with my other half. Decided in 3 days that I would host a show and use it to become a consultant, with the full support of may spouse.

My family wins, my upline wins and so does TPC. It has nothing to so with submission.

<Angel's Advocate :-) >
 
Its soo funny that you mention pink underwear and shrunken clothes, cause my husband does the laundry cause I am terrible at it. I stick to washing sheets and towels. Even then I have been known to screw those up to.
 
Same here
JerrySue said:
Had this occurred to anyone...

Perhaps those who checked-in with their hubbys before purchasing would rather host a show for the benefits. So, they wanted to go home and sell the idea to their hubbys before committing to a purchase or a show with the consultant.

I mean how many times have we done something only to realize later that if it was done differently we would have save hundreds of dollars?

In my case, I was looking to do a major purchase. Did not have the $ that night. Looked over the host benefits. Then started reading about the business. Talked it over with my other half. Decided in 3 days that I would host a show and use it to become a consultant, with the full support of may spouse.

My family wins, my upline wins and so does TPC. It has nothing to so with submission.

<Angel's Advocate :-) >

I did the same thing. I went home and discussed it with my husband and he noticed how I went on and on about the products and how it was easy to get up there and demo the stuff to earn money and free products.
He told me "Why don't you sell it too?" My $90 invenstment would have been smaller than what I planned to spend on products that night.
I am glad I talked it over with him. Because of his support and encouragement I am into my second year and three months of selling PC and I love it.
I don't take offense to the suggestions that I am not an independent woman because I choose to submit to my husband. I hear that alot. Just because I submit to his leadership role in the home doesn't mean I never make decisions and have to ask him what I should wear, if I can go out in public or if I can spend a dime on anything...LOL
My husband knows I make decions based on discernment and prayer. He trusts that.
And yes we will be accountable for our own actions and decisions to God but also my husband will be accountable for the role he was given in our household. Plus we will be responsible in how we handled HIS (God's) money, how we handled the upbringing of our children (discipline, love, guidance, etc) and of course we will be accountable for our own lives personally and seperately.
This is what I read in the bible and I choose to follow in my life. That is not crazy, just different from how you choose to live your life. I think we are all mature, grown women who can give our opinions and have discussions without having to stop threads and get upset with one anohter. We must accept and tolerate ALL types of families, even if we don't agree. But I should be able to disagree.

Debbie :D
 
Rebeccascabinet said:
Its soo funny that you mention pink underwear and shrunken clothes, cause my husband does the laundry cause I am terrible at it. I stick to washing sheets and towels. Even then I have been known to screw those up to.

My husband has so many bad laundry stories...one time while living with a bunch of guys, he lost the box of dryer sheets so decided to dry his clothes without them...turns out the whole box was in the dryer and no one could go by him for a month with all that fabric softener.

Second one is after we got engaged, I found an apartment up north where we were going to live and left my apt. in Racine and moved in with my parents for the last 4 months to save $. Anyway, I went to go up north and visit and asked if he needed anything...he said no...I said how about some more laundry detergent...he said "which bottle is that" I said, "the light blue bottle next to the dark blue bottle on the floor in the pantry". He said, "dark blue bottle, where? I've been using the light blue bottle to wash clothes." He was washing his clothes in Snuggle fabric softener for 3 months straight! Needless to say, that's how laundry became mine...

If I go out of town for work or something though, he will step in and do laundry...VERY CAREFULLY!
 
  • Thread starter
  • #44
Ladies! I didn't mean to get into a religious discussion! :o

It was just something that was odd to me. I'm not a go to church kinda girl. It was just quite different than the way I was brought up and in my current beliefs. My hubby and I are 50/50 with things and I don't ask permission to spend money. We have an agreement that if it is going to me more than 100 bucks we'll discuss it first (well usually). That kinda came into being when I bought a car (total misunderstanding...he thought I said one thing when I really said the other) without him. We have separate bank accounts that are linked b/c he is self employed and it's just easier that way.

:o Anyway....hope i didnt' ruffle toooo many feathers with this thread!:o
 
Not at all
Tara1021 said:
Ladies! I didn't mean to get into a religious discussion! :o

It was just something that was odd to me. I'm not a go to church kinda girl. It was just quite different than the way I was brought up and in my current beliefs. My hubby and I are 50/50 with things and I don't ask permission to spend money. We have an agreement that if it is going to me more than 100 bucks we'll discuss it first (well usually). That kinda came into being when I bought a car (total misunderstanding...he thought I said one thing when I really said the other) without him. We have separate bank accounts that are linked b/c he is self employed and it's just easier that way.

:o Anyway....hope i didnt' ruffle toooo many feathers with this thread!:o

You didn't ruffle any feathers. We are all big girls and can handle a serious discussion from time to time. LOL

Debbie :D
 
Here's a suggestion. If you find yourself in a circle of customers who do end up saying, let me take the catalog home...check ahead.
When Host coaching, tell your host to ask guests if they might need or want to see the catalog before the show. Most guests who would normally want to take the catalog home to discuss with husband may be able to look at the catalog and then discuss then come to the party and actually order.

my only other comment is that when I have had people tell me they were taking the catty home to check with their hubby, I just assumed it was an excuse to leave without placing an order.
 
This is like that game when you whisper something to someone and by the time it comes back around, it's totally different....

Next!
 
ChefBurke said:
why doesn;t the Man OBEY his wife or BOW down when we are the source of life! We bring life into this world-Man cannot!!! QUOTE]

We may bring life into this world but not without our man.
 
janetupnorth said:
...just had to add one more time...we (some of us here) view submission as the selflessness in our marriage relationship. God asks us to do that, but also not to a husband who is not serving God. He commands the husbands to love us knowing that if that wasn't given in return it would be a power/control thing which is not how the marriage relationship was intended. For those who get "scared" off by the word submission or worked up, I would challenge them to study the Bible and see how it is intended. As Rebecca said, it is a choice to be "submissive" and for others, it is separate from any political views. It is a spiritual submission... OK, thoughts done for now...

...back to my laundry. ;) (That is because I don't want pink underwear and shrunken clothes!)

Well put! I think we all need to go study our Bibles tonight on what submission to our husbands is!
 
Oh, where oh where is KG????
 
jwpamp said:
Oh, where oh where is KG????

Probably finding the story of Ehud in the Bible (where the left-handed man stabbed the fat guy.)
 
Well, aside from the religous part... Come on ladies, sometimes it can be fun to be submissive:D If you catch my drift. But then again, that may be why my two children are close together in age...;) hehe
Just trying to lighten things up
 
"My husband has so many bad laundry stories...one time while living with a bunch of guys, he lost the box of dryer sheets so decided to dry his clothes without them...turns out the whole box was in the dryer and no one could go by him for a month with all that fabric softener.

Second one is after we got engaged, I found an apartment up north where we were going to live and left my apt. in Racine and moved in with my parents for the last 4 months to save $. Anyway, I went to go up north and visit and asked if he needed anything...he said no...I said how about some more laundry detergent...he said "which bottle is that" I said, "the light blue bottle next to the dark blue bottle on the floor in the pantry". He said, "dark blue bottle, where? I've been using the light blue bottle to wash clothes." He was washing his clothes in Snuggle fabric softener for 3 months straight! Needless to say, that's how laundry became mine...

If I go out of town for work or something though, he will step in and do laundry...VERY CAREFULLY!"

Mine aren't that bad, but I have had the red sock in white laundry, too little or too much laundry soap, wrong temp water, shrunken clothing, you get the picture.
 
Is it bad that I turned all my son's white socks, wash clothes, & burp clothes green yesterday?? No, not pink- green, which is good b/c DH wouldn't appreciate DS wearing pink socks
 
  • Thread starter
  • #55
mbh06 said:
Is it bad that I turned all my son's white socks, wash clothes, & burp clothes green yesterday?? No, not pink- green, which is good b/c DH wouldn't appreciate DS wearing pink socks

GREEN! Now that's a new one. I've only ever turned things pink!!! :D
 
Well, I have a ring sling carrier for DS and It is new, didn't realize that it would do that either!!
 
Wash your items with some vinegar in the load the first time around and the colors will set in and not bleed the next time. It also is good to put some in to take out odors...such as urine smell when the kids are potty training....oh wait, that's the other thread! :)
 
Hey, this is fun! Let's see where we go from here! LOL!!
 
mbh06 said:
Well, aside from the religous part... Come on ladies, sometimes it can be fun to be submissive:D If you catch my drift. But then again, that may be why my two children are close together in age...;) hehe
Just trying to lighten things up

Bahahahahaa!!
 
Well said Janet and Debbie. I loved the definition that you two gave of submission. I don't believe that there is anything wrong with discussing religious beliefs on this website. I think that we can all put on our big girl panties and take it. I believe that you either believe what the Bible teaches or you don't. Ephesians 5:22-32 discuss the relationship that a husband and wife are to have. I quote, "Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church,his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." I don't believe that I am weird or strange because I submit to my husband. I definitely love to submit to him in many things. You see, I married a man that I know will take care of me and will always look for my best interest. I think people see the word submissive and they immediately think weak. I see the word submissive and I think of our Lord and Savior Jesus. Weak is definitely NOT a word I would use to describe Jesus. He submitted to his Father our LORD. Jesus did the dirty work, and he is not any less of a man for it.
 

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