How Can I Ease My Daughter's Heartbreak Over My Upcoming Trip?

[pcchris]

So, tonight, coming home from my show, my DD starts to cry. (She was out on the trampoline at the host's house while I was doing my show). So, of course, I think she got hurt on the trampoline...so then she sobs to me, and I'm quoting "mom, I'm really going to miss you when you go to Chicago". Now I'm feeling guilty about going. She's 13, and a real Momma's girl. What should I tell her? I told her "I'm only gone for a few days
and I'll call her when I'm down there before she goes to bed". I'm feeling pretty bad about leaving her home with my DS. (he's 19). Argh!! Any words of advice?

So typical....high one minute, low another.

 

[KellyTheChef]

Chris~

Aren't the teen years the "best"? LOL Not that it's going to help you, but it sounds like you have a good relationship going with her- keep that up!

Make sure she knows she can talk to you about what's she's feeling, but that this is something you need to do for your business and for you as a person.

Perhaps you could leave her a note for each day that you will be gone. Reminding her of the traits she has that you love and are proud of. Something to take the focus off the fact that you aren't there.

She will be fine! And she will be stronger for knowing that she can do something that she fears. (Being home without you...)

 

[raebates]

I know it's hard. You know she'll be fine. You know that having a mom who is modeling successful behavior (continuing to learn and grow through new experiences) is a very good thing. Go ahead and cry with her. Let her know you'll miss her, too. Then, leave the guilt behind when you leave for Chicago.

 

[pcchris]

Good advice....thanks Kelly and Rae! I knew I could count on you ladies for great advice!! Very much appreciated!

 

[shano]

my 10 year is also doing this. I keep telling her how exciting her days away from are going to be. Because my husband works nighta a family friend is moving to my house for the few days I am away and they have tons of things planned to do. Swimming at the lake, mini golfing, coking and making a mess w/ all my PC items!! But I told her, and this is what really helped, no matter where I am , she is w/ me. I love her too much not to think about her. Ok cry now.

 

[chefmeg]

OK-maybe I am doing something wrong, but my kids don't even blink an eye about me going to Conference! I would say though, that it is important to share your feelings with your daughter and then buck up and GO TO CHICAGO! She has to see how important this is to your job and what this job does for us & our families versus any other job!
Maybe my kids miss me when I'm gone, but they don't voice it-they know I am going no matter what and they enjoy hearing about it all when I get back!

 

[dannyzmom]

Ugh. My 8yo this afternoon, after being bratty and fighting with his brother all week long, grabbed me as we were leaving Target and clutched onto me. I said "Are you ok?"
"No, I am sad."
"I am really going to miss you while we're gone" (he's going to be travellnig with is father & little brother while I am away...they'll be gone 8 days)
These poor kids

 

[missydivine]

My girls miss me when I'm gone. They love it when Grandma comes to stay. Tea parties everyday!

Chris, I would definitely leave her notes for each day you are gone. Maybe you could hide them where she would find them and it would bring a smile to her face. I do that when DH goes out of town and hide them in his suitcase. My DD's are little, but I would leave them little gifts, a movie, something special for when I'm gone.

 

[aried]

My 16 year old is chanting "Mom is leaving tomorrow!' LOL. I think my 13 year old is too, they are both girls. They are also picking up our new dog while I'm away.


Ann R.

 

[pcchris]

Again, thanks everyone for your wise advice! I'm happy to her others are going through this too. BTW - tonight she was okay, but still gave me an extra long hug before she went to bed. Poor kid. She'll get over it. And I'm going to have FUN! Hope she doesn't read this when I'm gone...little stinker knows my password to get in here. She doesn't miss a trick.

 

[MissChef]

I'm sure that I will be going through this in a couple of days, I've got a Mama's girl that I don't think is going to handle me being gone very well! My son will miss me but she'll be the one that will tear out my heart! I already can tell, cause when I talk about conference she gets sad!

 

[shano]

it's nice to know they will miss us though.

 

[kisrae]

I'm I the only one wanting to get away from the kids. Don't get me wrong I LOVE my kids. But I'm looking forward to have just me time.
I'll be staying with family but it's still going to be nice to just have time to visit and not do all the mom stuff.
The kids will be with my DH and they have some great stuff planned. I'm sure on Wedsnday I'll be ready to come home.
I hope DH can handle everything okay. I hope he remembers that they need to eat and take showers.

 

[pcchris]

I'm I the only one wanting to get away from the kids. Don't get me wrong I LOVE my kids. But I'm looking forward to have just me time.
I'll be staying with family but it's still going to be nice to just have time to visit and not do all the mom stuff.
The kids will be with my DH and they have some great stuff planned. I'm sure on Wedsnday I'll be ready to come home.
I hope DH can handle everything okay. I hope he remembers that they need to eat and take showers.

I'm looking forward to "me time" too, but my DD is the one with the problem. She'll be fine...and I'm not going to worry about it anymore. She's a big girl and she's just going to have to pull up her big girl panties and deal with it! (thanks, rae, for that saying here).

I'm ROFLMAO with the comment about showers and eating...WAY too funny!!

 

[chefjeanine]

I'm looking forward to "me time" too, but my DD is the one with the problem. She'll be fine...and I'm not going to worry about it anymore. She's a big girl and she's just going to have to pull up her big girl panties and deal with it! (thanks, rae, for that saying here).

I'm ROFLMAO with the comment about showers and eating...WAY too funny!!

As a mamma's girl from WAY back, I'm glad to hear this response. The best thing you can do for her is go away so she can see she'll survive.

Going away to camp (as a camper and later as a staff person) and going off to college were very tough times for me but I was fine (and better for the experience) and your daughter will be too.

Enjoy your FREEDOM!

 

[pcchris]

Oh, I will enjoy my freedom! Also going to tell her and my DS that if there is a problem, they need to call Dad, as there is nothing I can do from Chicago. Dad can deal with them. (Unless it's a MAJOR emergency or something) I have also told DH that he is not to bother me unless it's urgent. Is that fair? He (DH) goes ATV-ing, snowmobiling, all that stuff, and I don't call him, so I feel that they should let me be...see, now I'm being selfish. Oh well!

 

[shano]

As much as I love my family, I know how much they will miss me too. But I cant wait to get away from them!! LOL!!Just think no nagging, cooking, cleaning the house, just my shared room.

 

[chefjeanine]

I have also told DH that he is not to bother me unless it's urgent. Is that fair? He (DH) goes ATV-ing, snowmobiling, all that stuff, and I don't call him, so I feel that they should let me be...see, now I'm being selfish. Oh well!

Absolutely fair and not the least bit selfish. . .we all need time away.