Finding Friends in a New Town: My Story

[jenniferknapp]

I know that a lot of you have families, but maybe were in my situation prior to all of that...and maybe have some suggestions! Here is a little background on me:I graduated from a state college here in NY, about an hour from my hometown... in May of 2005. I had a great internship, and was offered a job here at the College. Since then, I was promoted once, and I have a GREAT job here...and I am renting an awesome 2 bedroom house... so everything is falling in to place so well with me, especially since I am only 23...except for friends! All of my college friends moved home or away for jobs, and I am having a hard time meeting anyone! I work with older adults, and do some family activities or dinner with them some of them...but they all have young kids. I meet a lot of people with Pampered Chef, but that is still mostly older ladies. (A few people that are my age that I do know aren't willing to pay the money for PChef items, they just don't get it yet...)I recently just broke up with my boyfriend (from home) of almost 2 years as well, just because he was immature in a lot of ways, and he was holding me back...I feel like I am at an "in between" hard place right now, because once you have small kids, you meet other young mom's through the kids...but not me. Most of my friends are in my hometown, but don't come to visit me here. I would love to spend more time in this area, instead of going back to my hometown every weekend...Does anyone have any ways that they met people their age in a town they are "new" to? I know that the college scene should give me so many contacts right there, but I feel very mature for my age, and a lot of college kids will either move away or be immature... ahh, please help if you have any advice. And sorry this is so long!

 

[rennea]

Your not aloneThis is something that happens to most people after school. I live in the same town I went to school but it still happened to me. All my school friends moved away or like you said have children and are busey raising them. Try to find new activities that intrest you. Keep checking local events in your area. It will take time but you'll meet people. Keep you head up, this is all apart of growning up I have always said.

 

[Chefgirl2]

If you are religious join a church. A lot offer adult activities and committies. If they offer sports then volunteer to help in the concession stand. We always need help.

See if your community has a Womens club.

Join up for a coed volleyball league. Even if you don't play there are different levels. There will be adults of all ages and if they won't have shows their parents might.

I have a younger sister that works so much. She needed to get out and meet others...that is some of what she did.

 

[janetupnorth]

I can relate and can't - I met most of my "single" friends at church.

I was single until age 26...graduated with 2 bachelor's degrees and didn't get married until 3 years later. Already had met my husband but after dating him for awhile in college swore he was an immature jerk and would NEVER date him again (NEVER say never...he grew up, got focused, and is an awesome spouse, father, guy, etc.)

You are in a good-sized city...

...what are your interests? If you don't go to church or have a home church, you could meet people at a gym, at a sporting event, something...

...just some thoughts...

 

[Miss Cori]

OMG we are the same person! Good Luck and hope you(and me) get more friends!!!

 

[Grandmarita]

Is it possible the college where you work has night programs that you could take just because you have an interest in that area? You might meet some
adult students that live in the area, and expand your circle of contacts that way. Is there a Young Adults group at a nearby Church you might join, or a Church you would feel comfortable attending where you might be able to Volunteer and get to meet some new folks. So many agencies advertise in the Weeklies for Volunteers. I know that when I had time on my hands, and nobody I was dating, I volunteered time on Sundays which was one of the most difficult to be alone, for me. I met my husband in a Prayer Group. My daughter is currently single and has subscribed to E-Harmony. We will be
having lunch to talk about how it is progressing. I'm not suggesting that for you, at your age, but I've known several folks who met in a Church setting, and have been blessed by the common foundation they have for their relationship. I will be praying for you to find a wholesome, safe place to increase your circle of social contacts.

 

[AJPratt]

We have the same problem, my husband and I. Most of our friends have kids, so its tough to make plans. And, its tough to make friends, too.

I would suggest joining a local civic organization like: Kiwanis, Zonta, Lions (Lioness), Rotary or some other group. Maybe you could volunteer at a local hospital.

 

[rebeccastt]

I second that...Jennifer (and Cori),
I would say go to a church. I was single until 31 so I know exactly what you are going through. I moved away from all of my college friends and had to start over. I started going to a big church up here to meet people my age and joined a really neat Bible study group.

This is a huge transition time for you both, but don't get down on yourselves. I tried to keep positive and try new things. Check out local softball leagues, bowling, volleyball, etc.

Be open to the people who are around you, even though you think they don't fit the "type" of person you would enjoy being friends with. Sometimes people surprise you!

 

[jenniferknapp]

Already had met my husband but after dating him for awhile in college swore he was an immature jerk and would NEVER date him again (NEVER say never...he grew up, got focused, and is an awesome spouse, father, guy, etc.)

Haha, I was hoping that my ex would turn in to that guy....and we are still friends, and he is now hoping to get a better job and get focused on his life for him, instead of me pushing him every step of the way... so I just said you never know what may happen in the future, if it is meant to be it will be! So time will only tell with that. I just couldn't waste more of my time waiting to see if he ever does change... (since he didn't do much in the 2 years we were together)


As for everything else, I was a huge volleyball player for years, I will have to see if there is anything around here! I am part of the Young Alumni Council, which should have opened some leads to residence hall directors that serve as well, and are in the same situation...but they were all friends and kind never followed through with getting in touch with me when they were going to do something the following weekend....

As for the church stuff, I am Catholic, and grew up going to church every weekend, and church school through confirmation in 10th grade...and then sort of died down to the holidays and once in awhile with my mom. I know that someday I will go back again, and will raise my kids the way that I was raised..but I just have a hard time completely understanding why I would go....when I do, I find myself just thinking about daily life, and not really paying attention. Sort of like a college student that doesn't try, I would rather go back when I am an adult and concentrate 100% on getting a 4.0...so I just feel like I am not at that point yet...

Thanks everyone for your ideas already, and I look forward to hearing more... I just want my life to fall in to place now, and settle down with someone that can offer me what I can give to them!

 

[tashayoung]

I'm feeling your pain! I'm a single mom and although friends aren't the problem, mine is men. I don't know ANY single men and so dating isn't even a possibilty right now. Kinda sucks! Especially since my ex-husband is dating my ex-neighbor friend who he cheated on me with. All my friends are either dating someone or married...sucks being the only single one when they all have plans with their families or boyfriends. OK, pity party is over now!

 

[Trish1953]

If you can't find a group that fits your needs (Book Club, Volleyball Team, Women's Professiional Group etc.), make up your own group. I didn't get married until I was 40, so I can relate to that awkward sense of loneliness. I worked a lot of nights at the library in a new town I'd moved to, so I didn't have time to make a lot of friends. Found some at a church. But, what finally worked for me was to create my own singles group (was known as Tarrant Area Singles Network). It was not church-affiliated, we met at a local restaurant. We planned outings and field trips and went to movies, etc., as a group. There were some very cool people in it. I put a press release in the local paper and we had lots of people show up at meetings. Now, they have all sorts of groups out there (Singles Over 6 Ft. Tall, Dining Out Singles, Adventure Sports Singles, etc). Some of those you can find online or listed in your newspaper. About a church-group thing...you don't have to belong to a church to go to their socal activities. Several churches around here offer Singles or Family Nights, where folks congregate to socialize and play games or cards. You don't have to belong to join in the fun. One other thing, everybody is a stranger until you get to know them. When you're out and about, doing daily errands, etc., don't be shy about talking to people. You might just run into your next BEST FRIEND.

Trish in Texas
Future Director & Recruiter

 

[speedychef]

I know how it is. Anne, I hear ya there, too! I started making friends when I got Holly the Husky. I know it sounds crazy, but I call her my "friend finder." I met several people out walking with her, one lady invited me to her house for a Southern Living at Home party, then another lady invited me to her house for a Mary Kay party, where I found out the first lady sold Pampered Chef...the rest is kind of history. I met a lot of people going to Direct Sales parties, jewelry, purses, Mary Kay, Southern Living, Tastefully Simple, etc...maybe host a party or two to get to know your neighbors? I'm one of the younger ones in my neighborhood but I'm really starting to kind of get in my groove with friends! I remember getting out of school and feeling like I was such a loser because all my college friends were FAR away, and I hadn't had that many HS friends, and we had sort of grown apart. Well, we picked up pretty well, but anyhow...

SO, here are your options:
1. Get a dog (don't get a husky...they're INSANE!)
2. Join a club
3. Do some sporty thing
4. Join a gym (I know some friends who made friends with people in Yoga class)
5. Host a party or 10
6. Go to a bar and say to someone roughly your age, "Hi, my name is Jennifer. Do you want to be my frind?" LOL! I contemplated that once...

 

[jenniferknapp]

SO, here are your options:
1. Get a dog (don't get a husky...they're INSANE!)
2. Join a club
3. Do some sporty thing
4. Join a gym (I know some friends who made friends with people in Yoga class)
5. Host a party or 10
6. Go to a bar and say to someone roughly your age, "Hi, my name is Jennifer. Do you want to be my frind?" LOL! I contemplated that once...

Thanks again for more info everyone... it is just so odd to me that I am such an outgoing person, but yet I have a hard time talking to people and meeting friends...

And here are the answers:
1. I live 15 mins out of the "city" ...so out on a highway, won't meet anyone there....and plus, my neighbors across the highway, I think they are drug dealers!!
2. I could join a club - I will do some investigating!
3. I will look in to team stuff again; a few summers ago I tried to get involved in a softball league, and they never contacted me about a team!
4. I go to the gym here on campus during faculty hour @ lunch... I can't see paying for one when I get this for free. If I go after work (like I used to do) ...it is just filled with students, and well....it's more of a fashion statement then a work out for them.
5. The few people that are my age around here don't seem interested in spending a lot of money on anything...they are broke just graduated college kids...
6. I just don't know about that, there are a lot of students at the bars....or those scary homely "towny" people lurking at bars here!


haha, why do I have to be so difficult? I know that I am definitely inviting everyone in my department to a cookout at my house at the beginning of the summer.... I have a HUGE yard! Maybe that will find me some friends at work....the few that don't have families! Oh, and did I mention that there is one reallly really mature guy that I do work with....and he is my age? I think my boss is working on that one!!!

 

[pampermeplease]

Jennifer, it doesn't sound like your options are too bad. Everytime I make new friends here, they pcs or divorce! LOL. I met alot of new people at the gym....I made myself do something that was totally out of character for me and it turned out fun. Maybe try a thing or two you wouldn't normally do. Good luck.

 

[GeorgiaPeach]

I know that I am definitely inviting everyone in my department to a cookout at my house at the beginning of the summer.... I have a HUGE yard! Maybe that will find me some friends at work....the few that don't have families!

Maybe make your cookout like a PC show..."Bring a friend (that's my age), get a gift!"

Also...don't rule out making friends with someone older than you (like some of the older women you meet at shows). I have met two women that are about 15 yrs older than me. They are so much fun to talk to. I enjoy their wisdom and through them I've met their daughters that are closer in age to me. It's been a win-win situation.

 

[jenniferknapp]

Haha, that is great idea!!I definitely don't rule out anyone, I love the ladies that I used to work with (across campus) ..and work out with the everyday at lunch, and do dinners with them and their families once in awhile! It's just that they are so busy and caught up with their families, that someone my age would be more likely to not be tied down (although it seems like everyone is getting married this summer! haha)

 

[Miss Cori]

Except us of course!

 

[ChefBeckyD]

I was single until I was 34, and I remember what it was like - I moved away from all of my college buddy friends, and I remember feeling so lonely. I discovered that my friends didn't all have to be just like me! I met an older single lady who turned out to be a blast - we are still friends! A co-worker's wife (SAHM of 2)who loved calling me on my day off and saying "let's go play Putt Putt Golf"....I took my friendships where I found them. I also joined a church (Different than the denomination I grew up in) that turned out to be the best thing I ever did! Met my DH there, and made a ton of friends, married and single. there were always things to do and activities going on, and the sense of community was (and still is) awesome!

 

[yummy4tummy]

Oh Jennifer, I feel your pain. Although I am not as young as you are I feel that emptiness on a daily basis and I am married with a child. I know that sounds weird because I adore my family and my DH is my bestest friend but I long for a true female friend. Someone to share stories with, go shopping/movies or whatever.

When I first moved to NV, my best friend of 20 yrs lived here. Although she lived in "the city" (which was 100 miles away), I knew that I would still get to see her as that was the closest place to go shopping. I no sooner got my boxes unpacked before she moved back to CA because her DH got transferred. I started getting involved in Gymboree and later in gymnastics with my DD. I became good friends with 2 different women and THEY MOVED out of state. That's when I found out how true the saying "Out of sight, out of mind" really was. Although I have made numerous attempts to keep the friendship alive, it just hasn't happened. I feel like I was the only one putting any effort into corresponding. I joined PC to maybe finally meet some people but that isn't working out so well either (other than the great people that I have "met" here). I have ran into soooo many flakey people. Either they go mental on me (see PL story on another thread), fair weathered friends, or friends with attachments (what can YOU do for ME). I have always been a "quality not quantity" type of gal. I have come to the realization that alot of people around here do not invest alot of time to get to know anyone or to become that "true friend" that you rarely see anymore (at least I haven't).

Anyway, sorry to unload and unintentionally "hijack" this thread. Let's get back to you. I wish you luck on your outreach. I can always hook you up with my 3 nieces in NYC (not sure how far away from there you are) they are close to your age, not married, no children and are professionals.

 

[sarahmarie]

Cori and Jennifer, I am right with you. I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years back in november. after that i realized that i had severed all my other friendships because i was so involved in him (and he got very jealous whenever i hung out with anyone else. and he was too immature for me. and the problem was that he changed too much. he used to be PERFECT!) I am jus tnow trying to get back into the "friends" mode. My two best friends are a 28 year old Chico's manager and a 41 year old (who i kinda work with). So they are older than me. I dont really know that many people my age. i am very involved in my church. if you want to you can PM me with the town you are in. My dad knows some people who planted a church in upstate NY. I would encourage you to get involved in a non-denominational contemporary church. Our church has darn good (loud) music and a lot of young people. We have a college and career group (which i have not gone to yet). I know a few people in your situation. You dont want to join a college group because they are just worried about tests and you are worried about work and paying rent! Also, hanging out with college kids (even the mature ones) you cant do must that costs over $7! My 28 year old friend and i went out to dinner and shopping one night and spent way too much money! it is nice to be out with someone who can do that! Good luck with it all. the three of us need to form a support group! he he.

 

[Miss Cori]

We need to move close to eachother!! I wish there was a chefsuccess town we could all move to. We could have streets named after our products. Greg could by Mayor. Sorry Im bored..

 

[PamperedChefDebi]

Cori and Jennifer, I am right with you. I broke up with my boyfriend of 2 years back in november. after that i realized that i had severed all my other friendships because i was so involved in him (and he got very jealous whenever i hung out with anyone else. and he was too immature for me. and the problem was that he changed too much. he used to be PERFECT!) I am jus tnow trying to get back into the "friends" mode. My two best friends are a 28 year old Chico's manager and a 41 year old (who i kinda work with). So they are older than me. I dont really know that many people my age. i am very involved in my church. if you want to you can PM me with the town you are in. My dad knows some people who planted a church in upstate NY. I would encourage you to get involved in a non-denominational contemporary church. Our church has darn good (loud) music and a lot of young people. We have a college and career group (which i have not gone to yet). I know a few people in your situation. You dont want to join a college group because they are just worried about tests and you are worried about work and paying rent! Also, hanging out with college kids (even the mature ones) you cant do must that costs over $7! My 28 year old friend and i went out to dinner and shopping one night and spent way too much money! it is nice to be out with someone who can do that! Good luck with it all. the three of us need to form a support group! he he.

I totally agree with Sarah about finding a Non-Denominational Contemporary Church! Especially with what you said about where you are with your faith! You MIGHT find that such a church is EXACTLY what you needed and weren't getting. Or, you might not! It's kinda one of those things you just gotta experience to understand.

I do understand though. I was 29 when I got married and moving all the time with the military so constantly starting over. Plus, I was never the type of have ALOT of CLOSE girlfirends. I just usually got along better with the guys. I've never been a giggly, gossipy female like so many I met were. And there is something with women....a guy can say "hey wanna go get a beer" or something and they've bonded. For one woman to ask another woman that would get her some very wierd looks. Why is that?

 

[jasonmva]

JK do you want me to move back to NY? I'm sure my parents would be happier if I did! (just as long as I didn't move back to my hometown)

 

[jenniferknapp]

Thanks everyone, once again I am definatley going to check out the non-denominational churches in the area - but this means I also have to not go to my hometown on the weekends, so that I will be around for church on Sundays! hehe ....of course where am I now? At my mom's ...

It is so true about just wanting a good girlfriend to be able to relate with. I have always gotten along better with guys - and have had friendships with girls...but always get stabbed in the back, or need me to do stuff for them. I am so sick of my friends not doing anything because they are broke! I want to save money and go traveling the world!! Now is the perfect time before I get settled in anymore than I already am!

I also have severed some friendships due to guys...as well as the other way around. I think that it does happen to everyone at least a few times...

Also, it is really hard because my town is a college town....but literrally, it is a "city of the hills" ....it is in upstate new york, right in between Binghamton and Albany, but an hour from both. I am a country girl at heart, but a lot of the townies.....oh man! trailer parks everywhere, a lot of people don't have any teeth.....really, the only people that I want to associate with are basically professionals at the colleges!

 

[jenniferp417]

I feel your pain! I'm in the same type of boat - one friend from high school, and that's really it. And she doesn't drive, so getting together can be a real burden sometimes. I just re-joined a Toastmasters club I used to be a part of. Toastmasters is a club that develops public speaking and leadership skills - super-helpful for my PC career - and the club I belong to is just TONS of fun all the time. They've started doing get-togethers outside of club meetings as well.Most of the people in my club are professionals, and many are older than I am... but they just feel *right* to me. I think in time I'll find some real friendships there.So my point is, in addition to the other clubs mentioned, you might look for a Toastmasters club too (http://toastmasters.org/). Good luck!

 

[Pamperedpartylady]

CHURCH...all the way!

 

[jenniferknapp]

I just wanted to update everyone...thank you so much for all of the ideas! I sort of stumbled on to a softball team for our city leagues, so that has been great! And most of the ladies play on a volleyball team in the winter... and then with Pampered Chef on top of it, I feel a lot better with staying around here! If you were following my other prayer request thread, you know that my mom has had some major surgeries recently, and my weekends have been spent with her, so I haven't been staying here as much as I want, but I think that my friend-base is starting to grow ....thanks again!

 

[pamperedgirl3]

Oh Jennifer, I feel your pain. Although I am not as young as you are I feel that emptiness on a daily basis and I am married with a child. I know that sounds weird because I adore my family and my DH is my bestest friend but I long for a true female friend. Someone to share stories with, go shopping/movies or whatever.

I totally understand! My DH & I moved to FL from IN 2 months after getting married & me graduating college so he could go to dental school. I loved my job there & made some great friends, but we moved back to IN after he graduated 4 years later. I now stay home with my DD, so I don't have much in common with my FL work friends (many were not close to my age--different life happenings now). I also only have 1-2 friends here, but they are really busy so I mostly just hang out at home during the day with my DD & my nephew I babysit. I take them to the library for storytime every week, but have never met anyone that way. DD also takes gymnastics--again, never met anyone. Seems like everyone else has all the friends they need already. Moving to FL lost most of the high school & college friends I had. My church doesn't really have groups for meeting others, unless you're single.

So, just know that you aren't alone! I'm hoping once DD goes to school that I will get to make some friends too!

 

[PCJenni]

try www.meetup.com. I moved to a new area while I was still working so never meet anyone. Now I am a stay at home mom and needed to make friends. There are all kinds of groups on Meetup. You just put your interest and area in and a list of groups comes up.

 

[The_Kitchen_Guy]

Find a club or an organization that revoloves around something that interests you. Between the car clubs and the Lincoln Highway Association, I've met so many people over the years that have developed into close friendships. My best friend is a car guy that I met in the Model A Club more years ago than you've been...well, never mind that. Check the local library, too, because civic organizations tend to use the library community room and you might just find a local cause that you might join, like save the statue or raise money for the zoo to build a new raccoon house. There's thousands of people out there like you, the problem is herding you all together.

 

[katie0128]

try www.meetup.com. I moved to a new area while I was still working so never meet anyone. Now I am a stay at home mom and needed to make friends. There are all kinds of groups on Meetup. You just put your interest and area in and a list of groups comes up.

I was going to suggest meetup.com as well. I was looking for mommy-type friends and meet a great group on meetup. There are groups for EVERYTHING on meetup - from christians and pagans/witches/warlocks, star wars nuts and anti-tv people. In my area, we even have a "raw meat eaters" group. ick!

 

[GourmetGirl]

I'm in the same situation as both of you as well (I'm 23 all my friends are in Texas, where I went to college or spread out across the nation at grad schools)... part of why I joined PC was to make some friends that weren't my family. I lucked out and at my job most of my colleagues are my age, so I had an instant set of friends, but I still feel that way. I was talking with one of my friends who was in the same situation I was in when she was my age and she suggested I join the Jaycees... it's a great thing on a resume and a great thing to do for the community and the friendships and relationships that you get out of it are great (she met her husband on a service project). I haven't done this yet, but am hoping too... I just wish I had a friend that would go with me at the beginning I wish I still played a sport, but unfortunately I had a injury in high school cheerleading that pretty much ruined my knee (and never had the surgery that I was supposed to)...

I second the idea of a cheffer's town... however we could never be doing shows in our own neighborhood, as we would all be consultants

 

[The_Kitchen_Guy]

In my area, we even have a "raw meat eaters" group. ick!

Oh, darn, too bad I live somewhere else.

 

[chefbritt]

Jennifer, I'm glad things are starting to get better for you. I somehow missed this thread before, but I can definitely relate. I'm still in college. I'll be a junior in the fall, but I've always felt mature for my age, and I don't drink, so that pretty much eliminates most of the people I've met at college. It seems that partying is the only thing on people's minds. I work several part time jobs besides PC, and all of my co-workers are older than me as well. I live with my sister, who is 27 and a workaholic, and she's really the only person I socialize with. I've had a hard time finding groups to join that don't cost money to attend, and an even harder time finding the time in my schedule to do things between work and school. Oh, forgot to add, I also broke up with my boyfriend recently. We had been best friends since childhood, and had been dating for four years. He had similar issues of not wanting to grow up and do something with his life. We had gotten engaged, and he had plans to graduate college last year, but he dropped out. Now he's doing pretty much nothing with himself, and our lives just didn't match up anymore. That's been a difficult thing to get over for me, and so I haven't felt as social as usual, which doesn't help my problem. It's strange how some of us seem to be living parallel lives in some ways. Anyways, just wanted to let you know I know where your coming from. I guess I'll have to try a few of these ideas myself!

 

[jenniferknapp]

Alison,
I have no idea what the Jaycees are, maybe I will look in to it and see if it is my little town! Good luck Brittany,
Good luck! It is reassuring to hear so many other people are in the same situations... My friend and I just bought about 4 books on growing up, and surviving your 20's... and the books are interesting, and some of the things make a lot of sense!

 

[GourmetGirl]

Ohh... Jennifer I would totally check out books on quarter-life crisis... I bought a few my last year in college and just found them when I was back at home visiting last week... totally need to re-read them... they totally hit home with me, as I am sure they will you!

p.s. the jaycees are a volunteering organization and they also have social events

 

[ivykeep]

As for the church stuff, I am Catholic, and grew up going to church every weekend, and church school through confirmation in 10th grade...and then sort of died down to the holidays and once in awhile with my mom. I know that someday I will go back again, and will raise my kids the way that I was raised..but I just have a hard time completely understanding why I would go....when I do, I find myself just thinking about daily life, and not really paying attention. Sort of like a college student that doesn't try, I would rather go back when I am an adult and concentrate 100% on getting a 4.0...so I just feel like I am not at that point yet...
.

I'm Catholic too so I hear what you are saying and would suggest that you still may want to look into a Catholic Church in the area -- even if you don't go regularly, check the bulletin (actually, if you go to masstimes.org you can pull up a listing of all the Catholic Churches in the area and many post their bulletins on line). Many have young adult groups (my cousin met her husband at her church's young adults group). Most members are literally in your position -- that transitional age when some of their friends are already married or have moved away. The young adult groups generally aren't aren't focused on religion as a Bible study group and usually have some fun activities. Also by getting more involved in the Church it can give you a reason to go to Church where it becomes more meaningful for you.

I also was a member of a Presbyterian church's youth group when I was in middle and high school because it was highly recommended and had lots of kids from my school there (it was essentially non-denominational with an emphasis on Christianity but was not specifically presbyterian)

If you aren't ready to pursue that, I'd look in your local community paper in the events section and start doing things... anything that you find interesting from kite flying, to bowling, to whatever strikes your fancy.

 

[ivykeep]

I totally understand! My DH & I moved to FL from IN 2 months after getting married & me graduating college so he could go to dental school. I loved my job there & made some great friends, but we moved back to IN after he graduated 4 years later. I now stay home with my DD, so I don't have much in common with my FL work friends (many were not close to my age--different life happenings now). I also only have 1-2 friends here, but they are really busy so I mostly just hang out at home during the day with my DD & my nephew I babysit. I take them to the library for storytime every week, but have never met anyone that way. DD also takes gymnastics--again, never met anyone. Seems like everyone else has all the friends they need already. Moving to FL lost most of the high school & college friends I had. My church doesn't really have groups for meeting others, unless you're single.

So, just know that you aren't alone! I'm hoping once DD goes to school that I will get to make some friends too!

Checkout www.themommiesnetwork.com and see if they have a forum for your local area -- it's a great way to meat other moms (and if there isn't one, you can consider starting one up and then you will REALLY meet other moms).

 

[jenniferknapp]

p.s. the jaycees are a volunteering organization and they also have social events

I looked in to the Jaycees, of course there aren't any local chapters! Thanks for the idea though

 

[jenniferlynne]

Man, I sure wish you lived around here!!! I know the sweetest guy, and I have been trying to fix him up. I met him at my new job. He is 25, and works two full time jobs! During the day he works at an Engineering Company and at night he works at Home Depot (he started there when he was 19). Right now, school is out for the summer, but he also goes to school!! He already has a job offer from NASA when he graduates. He is sooooo totally cute and very nice. Poor thing gets crapped on by every girl he has ever dated (you wouldn't believe some of the stories he has told me ). Right now he really has no time to meet anyone because he tries to get a little sleep when he's not working. He doesn't smoke, drink or run around. If I wasn't married and was 10 years younger........

 

[jenniferknapp]

Man, I sure wish you lived around here!!! I know the sweetest guy, and I have been trying to fix him up. I met him at my new job. He is 25, and works two full time jobs! During the day he works at an Engineering Company and at night he works at Home Depot (he started there when he was 19). Right now, school is out for the summer, but he also goes to school!! He already has a job offer from NASA when he graduates. He is sooooo totally cute and very nice. Poor thing gets crapped on by every girl he has ever dated (you wouldn't believe some of the stories he has told me ). Right now he really has no time to meet anyone because he tries to get a little sleep when he's not working. He doesn't smoke, drink or run around. If I wasn't married and was 10 years younger........

Sometimes I think the line "nice guys finish last" is true! Except I'm a nice girl that seems to finish last! But I am also drawn towards the "bad boys" that need that motherly hand..and are needy, I think because my family is always helping everyone....so I get the satisfaction when I help them quit smoking, etc! But that is really just changing them, and after awhile they get mad that I didn't accept them for who they are....blah blah....I need to just change the type of person I go after in the first place!

I think that he should move towards New York Sounds like he is a great catch, too bad I am wayyyy to close to my family to move away!

 

[christy_c]

My friend and I just bought about 4 books on growing up, and surviving your 20's... and the books are interesting, and some of the things make a lot of sense!

Just curious, which books do you have or would you recommend? I'm right there with ya! 26, single, all my close friends have either moved away or are married with kids....it's tough!

 

[jenniferknapp]

20-Something, 20-Everything: A Quarter-life Woman's Guide to Balance and Direction (I just started this one)The Go-Girl Guide : Surviving Your 20s with Savvy, Soul, and Style (I finished this one already)The Quarterlifer's Companion : How to Get on the Right Career Path, Control Your Finances, and Find the Support Network You Need to Thrivetwentysomething: Surviving and Thriving in the Real World...I bought all used on Amazon.com, all used... and after s/h I paid about $30 for all 4.

 

[TwinGirlsMom]

Jennifer, this may have been mentioned before but are you on facebook? You can connect with your regional network and do a search for girls your age. There may be fb groups that would allow you to get to know people in your area.

 

[jenniferknapp]

I did recently join FaceBook. I am not as familiar with it as MySpace, but I will hopefully get there! It does seem like a great networking tool. Thanks for the idea!