Dealing With a Host Who Is Dodging You

[princessmeshelle]

i have 2 shows next weekend and i am trying to nail down specifics for one of them. every time i call i get voice mail, and i leave messages for her letting her know i am available at her convenience, but i will still be trying to reach just the same. i would threaten to just show up on time for the show, but i don't have her home address. some back ground on her, she is my insurance agent. when i was in the process of switching to her insurance company she said she would love to do a show. it has been rescheduled like, 4 times. i would say maybe she isn't interested, but she keeps going on how everyone is so excited and how excited she is. and every time it is rescheduled it is me asking her what she wants to do, and her response has been to reschedual. so as far as i can tell, i am only keeping up my end of the deal. but i got a hold of her on monday while she was at work (i had an insurance question for her) and i set up a time to call her that night since she was too busy at the moment to talk about the show. i'm getting nervous that she is blowing me off and i'm supposed to take a hint. part of me just wants to come out and ask her if she wants to call it off since she doesn't want to make the time for a 2 minute phone call. :grumpy: but the only way it would come out of my mouth would be most likely offensive to her so i'm keeping my trap shut. if she doesn't want to have they show that is fine, i will survive. but a week out i would like to know if my saturday has opened up. hubby is a month out and if i got a free saturady, i'd like to know. any pearls of wisdom would be very much appreciated! TIA!

 

[letscook04]

Under search type in "MIA HOST"

http://www.chefsuccess.com/f18/mia-host-46732/

 

[wadesgirl]

How did you get her a host packet?? One other thing that can help in for this situation in the future is to send out the invites for your host. You would have the address of the host and know that the invites went out and how many went out.

 

[pamperedlinda]

I bet she reschedules again.

 

[princessmeshelle]

i have a feeling that it will get rescheduled again as well. and i would love to get hosts to let me send the invites for them! for some reason though, everyone i have offered it to, (all of my hosts so far)have declined. i get told most often that they are just going to pass them out when hey see their friends at church or work or where ever. i have yet to have a host who uses the invites by sending them through the mail. in fact, i'm starting to wonder why i have a website! i put in people's shows online so they can share with friends and family further away, then they don't bother to log in and evite people. i have just received the cds on host coaching, so i will be listening to those and finding new strategies to help me with coaching. but this one, i can't threaten to show up, i don't have an address. i don't want to be rude to her, she is a very nice lady, but she is also my insurance person. i just don't want to burn any bridges, so after reading the MIA host thread (i had for gotten about it!) i think it is obvious i need to track her down or i need to leave a msg telling her i assume she is canceling because she won't talk to me to try and get her to call me. i really don't want to do the latter of the 2. i don't want to burn that bridge.but this does make me reconsider her as a recruit potential. if this is how she prioritizes a show she is excited about, how is she going to prioritize PC as a business? (she is a recruit lead by the way, was very interested and asked to be kept informed) so, anyway. any advice on how to approach her once i get her on the phone or in person?

 

[chefann]

I agree with Linda - it sounds like she will probably reschedule. Here's what I'd do. I'd leave another message, but indicate that I need to know for sure what my schedule is for that weekend, since an opportunity has come up. Something like this: "Hi, Betty, this is Ann from TPC calling about your show. I know we've been unable to connect to chat about it, and I do need to talk to you. I might have another opportunity opening up for next weekend, but since you're on my calendar already you're obviously my priority. I do need to know what to plan for, so please give me a call at..."

 

[DessertDivaFL]

This is so weird. I have the same situation for a show on Feb. 19th. However, I haven't gotten the host packet to her because I want to sit down with her and explain things.

She doesn't return my calls or emails. Something must have happened. I think I will call a friend who knows her and ask her. I don't like to weasel (sp?) around but I need to know what is going on.

 

[pamperedlinda]

I don't give my hosts the option of sending their own invites. When they book I give them a form to fill out with their guest's names and addresses along with a SASE back to me and a due date for getting it back to me (I write their name and due date on the top of the form). I tell them that as their consultant I will take care of their invitations (printing, writing, adressing, stamping, delivery to USPS) and all they have to do is give me the info. I've never had a problem getting the info from them. I do have several who like to use my PWS for evites and I don't balk at that - I just monitor that they do in fact do it. If they don't I call and ask how it's coming along. I started doing this 2 1/2 years ago and have only had @ 3 cancellations because they didn't get me the info in time. My show attendance and sales have also gone up more than enough to justify the extra expense of time and postage.

Is it out of the way for you to stop by the insurance office? Even if it is, make a trip down there. Just tell her that you were in the area and decided to stop by since time for her show is so close and you haven't been able to connect. Don't ask if she's sent the invites - just assume that she did. Ask her how the RSVPs are coming along and tell her you'd like to start preparing the show and give her a couple of recipe options and ask her for her choice.

Watch her facial expressions, you'll know if it's on or off. If she tells you that she needs to rescedule again I'd take it to mean that she really isn't interested and I don't think you'll ever get her pinned down to a date. Just tell her that you understand how busy she is and perhaps it would be best for her to check her calendar and give you a call when she's picked out a date. I'd be willing to bet that you will never get that call, but at least you aren't wasting your time on her anymore. Maybe ask her if a catalog show would fit her schedule better (I still wouldn't count on it being too much)

Good luck and go find someone else!

 

[wadesgirl]

I don't give my hosts the option of sending their own invites. When they book I give them a form to fill out with their guest's names and addresses along with a SASE back to me and a due date for getting it back to me (I write their name and due date on the top of the form). I tell them that as their consultant I will take care of their invitations (printing, writing, adressing, stamping, delivery to USPS) and all they have to do is give me the info. I've never had a problem getting the info from them. I do have several who like to use my PWS for evites and I don't balk at that - I just monitor that they do in fact do it. If they don't I call and ask how it's coming along. I started doing this 2 1/2 years ago and have only had @ 3 cancellations because they didn't get me the info in time. My show attendance and sales have also gone up more than enough to justify the extra expense of time and postage.

Is it out of the way for you to stop by the insurance office? Even if it is, make a trip down there. Just tell her that you were in the area and decided to stop by since time for her show is so close and you haven't been able to connect. Don't ask if she's sent the invites - just assume that she did. Ask her how the RSVPs are coming along and tell her you'd like to start preparing the show and give her a couple of recipe options and ask her for her choice.

Watch her facial expressions, you'll know if it's on or off. If she tells you that she needs to rescedule again I'd take it to mean that she really isn't interested and I don't think you'll ever get her pinned down to a date. Just tell her that you understand how busy she is and perhaps it would be best for her to check her calendar and give you a call when she's picked out a date. I'd be willing to bet that you will never get that call, but at least you aren't wasting your time on her anymore. Maybe ask her if a catalog show would fit her schedule better (I still wouldn't count on it being too much)

Good luck and go find someone else!

I agree with Linda, I don't GIVE my hosts an option, I tell them that's how I do it. I've been doing it for a year and love knowing when someone isn't going to hold their show (I never get a guest list back). I also do not give them a host packet until I get their guest list. This month I have my first host who opted to hand out all her invites. Oh well! It's up to her now but I've had several hosts who love the fact that they don't need to worry about it.

 

[princessmeshelle]

I don't give my hosts the option of sending their own invites. When they book I give them a form to fill out with their guest's names and addresses along with a SASE back to me and a due date for getting it back to me (I write their name and due date on the top of the form). I tell them that as their consultant I will take care of their invitations (printing, writing, adressing, stamping, delivery to USPS) and all they have to do is give me the info. I've never had a problem getting the info from them. I do have several who like to use my PWS for evites and I don't balk at that - I just monitor that they do in fact do it. If they don't I call and ask how it's coming along. I started doing this 2 1/2 years ago and have only had @ 3 cancellations because they didn't get me the info in time. My show attendance and sales have also gone up more than enough to justify the extra expense of time and postage.

Is it out of the way for you to stop by the insurance office? Even if it is, make a trip down there. Just tell her that you were in the area and decided to stop by since time for her show is so close and you haven't been able to connect. Don't ask if she's sent the invites - just assume that she did. Ask her how the RSVPs are coming along and tell her you'd like to start preparing the show and give her a couple of recipe options and ask her for her choice.

Watch her facial expressions, you'll know if it's on or off. If she tells you that she needs to rescedule again I'd take it to mean that she really isn't interested and I don't think you'll ever get her pinned down to a date. Just tell her that you understand how busy she is and perhaps it would be best for her to check her calendar and give you a call when she's picked out a date. I'd be willing to bet that you will never get that call, but at least you aren't wasting your time on her anymore. Maybe ask her if a catalog show would fit her schedule better (I still wouldn't count on it being too much)

Good luck and go find someone else!

is there a particular form? or is it someting you made up?

what does SASE stand for?

have you had any or much resistance from people on the invite issue. i have made it an offer to be helpful. i would be afraid of coming off pushy.

also, what kind of time frame do you give them?

that seems like a fairly efficient way to handle the invites, so i am intrigued. i would love to hear more about how host coaching works. i feel like i'm still barely scraping by. like there should be something more to it than give packet, make calls, pick recipe, and hope it works out. thank you for your help and sugestions!

 

[chefann]

SASE= self-addressed, stamped envelopeI use a form that I got from Colleen Finley (former member). Anything that you put together that has places for them to write down names and addresses will work, though. And if you put 50 or so places on it, they're more likely to give you more names.

 

[princessmeshelle]

just had a thought, has anyone tried asking for a wish list with the guest list? or does anyone have any tips on getting that out of your host? just thought maybe if i have an idea of what they want, i may be able to motivate them to think about their show. i feel like my "worst" shows seemed to have been with people i have been unable to motivate.

 

[pamperedlinda]

I got this form here and changed it up a bit for me.


what does SASE stand for? SASE - Self Addresses Stamped Envelope


have you had any or much resistance from people on the invite issue. i have made it an offer to be helpful. i would be afraid of coming off pushy. Not at all. When I'm doing my booking talk at my shows I tell them that when they book with me I make their life so easy by doing all the tedious work for them. I tell them that all they have to do is give me their list and I'll do the rest. Then I lookat my host and ask her how she liked it...they always give great props for this part

also, what kind of time frame do you give them? The list is due back to me 3 weeks before the show. If we book in close I tell them that we don't have time to mail the list back to me so go home, make the list and email it to me in 2 days (or whenever I want it).

Once I mail the invites I let my host know the date they went out. I call back in a week and ask ow the RSVPs are coming along and we choose a recipe then. I call her again 3 days before the show for an update on RSVPs and then again the night before. Each time I remind her to get outside orders from those who cannot attend. I put all my hosts on my PWS regardless of if theu send evites or even if they don't do email. There's a line on my invited that I send that gives them instructions fro ordering on my PWS - so even if the host doesn't do email, many of her guests do.

hth

 

[pamperedlinda]

just had a thought, has anyone tried asking for a wish list with the guest list? or does anyone have any tips on getting that out of your host? just thought maybe if i have an idea of what they want, i may be able to motivate them to think about their show. i feel like my "worst" shows seemed to have been with people i have been unable to motivate.

Nope, but I do ask what they want when we talk.

 

[princessmeshelle]

so, i think i have created a new contact method... telepathy... yep! apparently i thought enough about my host this morning that she finally called me! ok it was either that or the pile up of messages... she says that she has just been tied up with family issues, but the show is on. i am cautiously optomistic...

thank you all for your tips and help!

 

[pamperedlinda]

yep - must be all of us talking about her! I hope it's a good show.

 

[pampered1224]

I don't blame you for being cynical! Make sure you cover your you know what. she buys the food, she promises to contact you two mights before or you will assume the show canceled. And MAKE SURE SHE KNOWS THAT! And I wouldn't count on anything until you walk through her front door! I had a host like that. She never returned my calls and finally called the morning of the party and asked when I would be arriving. I told her quite simply that I wasn't. She said WHAT?? I have 15 people coming!!! And I told her I told you on my voice message on Wednesday that if I did not hear from by Thursday, I would consider the party canceled so I have nothing planned for you, other plans of my own, nothing packed and no food bought to prepared. I had not even gotten her a host kit because she never gave me her mailing address!!! All I had was a street name. No number!!! Some people's children! I mean really!
She ended up having a party and I only agreed to do it AFTER I got all the info I needed and a promise in WRITING that she would respond to my calls in a timely manner. She had a $165 party! What she did not know was that one of her guests called me and booked her own party and invited everyone the first gal invited because they were so POd at her too for screwing up their day. That host did a $700 plus party. You snooze, you loose!!!

 

[princessmeshelle]

Update on this host:

She has played phone tag with me all weekend. Every time I get her on the phone she apologizes and as soon as we get through the obligatory " Hi, I'm so sorry..." stuff she asks if she can call me back. :grumpy:
I'm thinking of sending her another email to host coach (so I can at least say I tried) and also let her know if we don't have a real conversation by 5pm Friday (I have a show after 5) I will have no choice but to assume that the show is a no go. I still don't have an address for her.

Any help with wording this would be appreciated!

 

[doughmama]

"I tell them that as their consultant I will take care of their invitations (printing, writing, adressing, stamping, delivery to USPS) and all they have to do is give me the info."Linda, I like the idea of sending out the invites. I did that for my last show and it helped but do you also give the host a few for herself to give to those who she might have forgotten to invite but will see while she is out and about?

 

[babywings76]

"I tell them that as their consultant I will take care of their invitations (printing, writing, adressing, stamping, delivery to USPS) and all they have to do is give me the info."

Linda, I like the idea of sending out the invites. I did that for my last show and it helped but do you also give the host a few for herself to give to those who she might have forgotten to invite but will see while she is out and about?

I put about 8-10 loose postcard invites in their host packet and let them know that they are there so she has a couple on hand to give out to people that she bumps into or thinks of at the last minute.

 

[princessmeshelle]

2nd update:

I swear this host may be a lurker here or some thing! Just as soon as I asked for help talking to her, she replies to my email saying that she will have to reschedule again. However this time she says we are "sticking with that date do or die". So problem solved for now. I suppose that she will remain on my email list and she will call when she is ready. I hate the idea of ignoring her though. She sounds genuine about her reasons for reschedualing over and over. Any way, I just wanted to thank everyone again for their help.

 

[pamperedlinda]

DO or DIE - huh? Are you taking bets? LOL Good luck with her.

 

[princessmeshelle]

Thanks- I may need it! Just got done emailing her back. I offered the catty show idea and told her I look forward to whatever she decides to do.