How Do I Get Rid of the Soother?

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Discussion Overview

This thread explores various personal experiences and strategies shared by participants regarding the challenge of getting children to give up their soothers or pacifiers. Participants recount their own stories, including the emotional aspects of the process and different methods they have tried.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based

Main Points Raised

  • One participant, identifying as a consultant, shares that her daughter still needs a soother to sleep at three years old and expresses concern about the emotional impact of taking it away.
  • Another participant suggests placing the soothers on the Christmas tree for Santa to exchange for a gift, noting that ultimately, taking it away may be necessary.
  • Several users mention different names for soothers, including "binky," "plug," and "Nuk-nuk," highlighting the variety of terminology used.
  • One participant recounts how her son stopped using his soother after being told it was causing chapped lips, which he accepted without much fuss.
  • Another participant describes a method where her daughter participated in a "bye bye binky party," which helped her transition away from the soother.
  • Some participants discuss the emotional challenges of the process, with one noting that her husband would struggle with their child's crying during the transition.
  • One participant reflects on her own childhood experience of giving up her soother after being told it would ruin her teeth, which she remembers vividly.
  • Another participant shares that her daughter had a specific soother she preferred, which eventually had to be thrown away without issue.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ on the best approach to take away soothers, with no clear consensus emerging on a single effective method. Participants share a variety of personal experiences and outcomes.

Contextual Notes

Participants' experiences vary widely based on their children's ages and personalities, with some noting that children may respond differently to the transition based on their developmental stage.

Who May Find This Useful

Parents and caregivers within the consultant community who are navigating similar challenges with their children may find these shared experiences and strategies relevant.

DebPC
Staff member
Messages
2,997
Anything to glam your newsletter?I like to use Word Art and download Clipart to make it more impactful and interesting, plus of course difference fonts and colors.
 
I do all that too and I put things in cute little boxes to highlight different achievements or topics.

I also go through and highlight the name of the person the NL is addressed to and add stickers or notes to personalize it.
 
My daughter's that is!! hehe She turned three in July and still needs it to go to sleep. I don't have the heart to hear her cry for a few days if I take it from her.

We've tried getting her to give them to new babies (her new foals, specifically) saying that they would need it more then her, but it didn't work.

I told her that they were getting yucky and that we should throw them out and her answer was - "that's okay, mommy, we can get more at the Superstore." - :rolleyes: Can't get ahead of her!!
 
Put them on the Christmas tree for Santa to exchange for a big girl gift.

Ultimately, though, you're probably going to have to just take it away. We did that when Sara was two. She fussed for maybe two nights.
 
are you talking about a pacifier ? or a blanket type thing??:confused:
 
Reba...I am talking about a pacifier....I thought everyone called it a soother....hehe :) Although, I do know someone who calls it a "plug" :grumpy:

Great idea about the Christmas tree. Thanks! If I do end up having to take it from her, I'll have to send DH away for the weekend, because I would be more stressed with him around 'cause he wouldn't handle her crying and fussing very well......daddy's girl!! :rolleyes:
 
My son was three when he finally got rid of his. It started giving him "chapped lips" (red all the way around his lips). One night we told him that we couldn't give it to him because it was hurting him. He never asked for it again!

Turns out we were worried for nothing. I thought he would have put up a bigger fight but he didn't. Sometimes they suprise us. At that age, they're much more logical than we think.
 
My oldest boy was hooked on the soother. We pitched them all in the trash, and endured the crying- it took 3 days then he was over it. Now my youngest boy is hooked on the soother and I sense a fight in the future...
 
I have no advice on this. When my son was 3 months old he spit his pacy out, I put it back it and he spit it out. We did this several times and he would not take it, so, I put them up and never got them out. I think some times like riding in the car would have been simpler if later I had given it back, but I am glad I didn't and that was one less thing I had to take away, ha!
 
PChefPEI said:
My daughter's that is!! hehe She turned three in July and still needs it to go to sleep. I don't have the heart to hear her cry for a few days if I take it from her.

We've tried getting her to give them to new babies (her new foals, specifically) saying that they would need it more then her, but it didn't work.

I told her that they were getting yucky and that we should throw them out and her answer was - "that's okay, mommy, we can get more at the Superstore." - :rolleyes: Can't get ahead of her!!


My mom and dad told me one night it would wreck my teeth (I had just turned 3)...I was greatly concerned by that and marched down the hall and threw it in my Holly Hobby waste basket and never asked for it again. I STILL 30+ years later remember the conversation, the march down the hall and the sound of the pacifier hitting the metal garbage can.

Luckily my kids never struggled with that. DD though has been seen sticking her thumb in her mouth a few times lately...(age 6, 2nd top tooth coming out...)
 
janetupnorth said:
My mom and dad told me one night it would wreck my teeth

this is what we told my DS (middle child) that worked for him too.

My DD would only ever take 1 particular one, she sucked a hole in it eventually we threw it away (at 9 mos) never an issue

My youngest DS had his until he was about 2.5 we did need to suffer a few nights but I don't really remember it being a trauma so I guess it went pretty easily!

yeah we called it a plug too!!
(or a pacifier)
 
LOL! We called it a "binky"

My DD loved her's so when she was about 1, we told her we were having a "bye bye binky party" b/c she was a big girl now. We made her watch us throw it in the trash so when she wanted one we would remind her they went "bye bye in the trash can"

Seems mean, I know but it only took a couple days for her to get over it.

My DS was a different story. We litterally lost all 4-5 of them at once! After him crying for 2-3 days, we finally found a couple of them but by then we figured it had already been a couple days of crying that we may as well get rid of them.
 
Christ Follower said:
LOL! We called it a "binky"

My DD loved her's so when she was about 1, we told her we were having a "bye bye binky party" b/c she was a big girl now. We made her watch us throw it in the trash so when she wanted one we would remind her they went "bye bye in the trash can"

Seems mean, I know but it only took a couple days for her to get over it.

My DS was a different story. We litterally lost all 4-5 of them at once! After him crying for 2-3 days, we finally found a couple of them but by then we figured it had already been a couple days of crying that we may as well get rid of them.

A binky is a blanket!!!! :balloon:
 
Actually, I looked up a list of names people have for them...We called them Nuk-nuks (since Nuk was the brand name)...Others call them:
doe-deez
woogies
foyas
paci
binkster
suck-it
bink bink
Dummies
Soothies
cork
faux boob
cork
nuknuk
nunu
pacifier
mute botton
Mr. Bink
Nip
Soothie
nookey
winky
bop
pappy
pap
binker
chupon (Spanish)
nu-nu
tete (pronounced tay-tay)
 
We always called them binkys as well - my daugher was big into hers - she was 2 1/2 years old - had the binky rash around her mouth and constantly had it in her mouth - she actually bit a hole into it. I told her she couldn't keep it and would have to throw it away - she did and didn't raise a fuss - I never replaced it - and she was fine with it - Luckily her bite went back to normal since it looked pretty bad at the end. I figure it's worth a little bit of crying than trying to take it away from a 4 or 5 year old when they are much more headstrong!
 
janetupnorth said:
Actually, I looked up a list of names people have for them...

We called them Nuk-nuks (since Nuk was the brand name)...

Others call them:
doe-deez
woogies
foyas
paci
binkster
suck-it
bink bink
Dummies
Soothies
cork
faux boob
cork
nuknuk
nunu
pacifier
mute botton
Mr. Bink
Nip
Soothie
nookey
winky
bop
pappy
pap
binker
chupon (Spanish)
nu-nu
tete (pronounced tay-tay)

We call ours a Nummie
 
LOL!! Didn't know there could be so many words for it!! Faux boob and mute button are good ones!! ;)

Okay, so guess I'll have to take the plunge! I will try telling her that it will wreck her teeth and see what happens.

Wish me luck!! :D
 
We call it a "bah" and who knows why. When my son was starting to talk way back when, he called it this (maybe relating it to a bottle that he drank his milk out of :confused:) and that's what we've called it ever since.

My daughter just turned 3 and that's my limit. VERY soon, maybe this weekend, we're going to get rid of it.

Here's what we did with my son and it worked like a charm. This is also the plan with my daughter this weekend and she knows all about it. About three years ago when we were wanting my son to give it up (he was 3 also), we told him he could use it like "money" and basically trade it in at Toys R Us for TWO toys of his choice. Of course, we wouldn't have done the motorized kid cars or anything. We said he had to gather up all of his "bahs" all over the house -he had four!!- and we'd go shopping. My husband and I both came and we made a big deal about it. While DH was off shopping with DS, I talked to a cashier and told her what we were doing so she'd act like that was the money he was buying the toys with.

So, we search the store for a while. He kept coming back to this (kind of lame of you ask me) Nemo story book that came with stickers you can stick in there to correspond to the story. Ok, fine, so he picked that and we told him he could pick something else because he was such a big boy. Well, he picked the same darn thing!!!:eek: So, we figured it WAS his choice, so he got two of the exact same thing. Luckily he never had problems sleeping without the bah, so that was so nice that it wasn't a struggle. The only problem was that he no longer napped after that.:( That's what I'm hoping doesn't happen with my daughter! I NEED that nap time! She's not quite as attached to it as he was, so I'm hoping it's not that big of a deal to her.

I'll have to report back when we attempt this same method with her! Another great method I've heard is a friend who had her son tie his to a bunch of balloons and let it go in the sky.
 
We did the Easter Bunny Basket (he was three at that time)....I told him that the Easter Bunny would leave him a special basket in exchange for his tete (we pronounced it teetee, it's Italian). So he did, got a great big basket, maybe asked for the tete a couple of times (with no tears) and he was fine. I thought he was going to make a bigger fuss, but he was great about it! I think the Xmas gift thing would work well too.
 
We never made a big deal about taking it away but of course they were younger...about 15 months old. By this age we only gave it to them for naps or nighttime--they took a morning and afternoon nap plus nighttime = 3 times per day. We did not let them walk around with it all day long. So our approach was to gradually eliminate one sleep time that they were give the pacifier. I first started with the afternoon nap. For example:

morning nap = pacifier
afternoon nap = NONE
night = pacifier

I did this until they are established in it--usually about a week--and then I took away the morning pacifier. So they were only getting a nighttime pacifier for quite a while...maybe a month or two before I took it away altogether. By that time, they were not attached to it at all and it seemed to be no big deal. They didn't really notice it was taken away!
 
Kimberly,
That is a great idea! My son is almost 14 months and I think I may start that. I'd rather cut it out sooner than later. I think it will be easier for him!
 
We call ours binky or binkster... a friend calls them chu chos (not sure if i'm spelling that right)

We have gotten our DD down to only using it at nap/bedtime. I think we will have drama on our hands when it is time to take it away....
 

Attachments

smashie said:
We did the Easter Bunny Basket (he was three at that time)....I told him that the Easter Bunny would leave him a special basket in exchange for his tete (we pronounced it teetee, it's Italian). So he did, got a great big basket, maybe asked for the tete a couple of times (with no tears) and he was fine. I thought he was going to make a bigger fuss, but he was great about it! I think the Xmas gift thing would work well too.

My friend calls them chu chos..(not sure of the spelling) is this also another word in Italian for binky?
 
My grandson calls it a "nuko".

Not all of our kids had pacifiers, some had blankets, some had both.

When it was "time" to give up his blanket I showed my oldest how worn it was getting and that if he wanted to have it when he was a man (which he had announced) we should put it in a drawer so it wouldn't wear out. He put it in. I told him he could look at it if he needed to but then distracted him - "okay, but first..." and after just a day or so he didn't ask at all. Eventually I moved it and about a year later he wanted to look again. I told him I had packed it away so it wouldn't get lost before he was a man. He got it back when he got married (actually I gave it to his wife).

My grandson was very attached to his nuko but they got him to it being a in bed only thing. Of course when he wanted it he'd crawl into bed and then a few minutes later he'd be out playing with it. My son wanted it gone but DIL wasn't as strong about it so he had it until just a couple weeks ago when his dad said "why don't you just throw that thing away". He walked over to the garbage can and tossed it in. No more nuko and he hasn't asked once for it.

When they're ready it's easy.
 
pamperedbecky said:
I'll have to report back when we attempt this same method with her! Another great method I've heard is a friend who had her son tie his to a bunch of balloons and let it go in the sky.

Well, we just got back from Toys R Us and Meena has given up the pacifier! Woo hoo! We gathered up the three pacifiers from her crib and reviewed what we were doing. She picked a Disney princess little piano and a little Barbie "laptop" little learner. She was very excited because she knew before we even went that she wanted a little piano. She gave up the pacifiers to the cashier very readily. The big test will be how she does with her nap today and going to bed tonight. I'm keeping my fingers crossed. I think she understood she won't be getting them back! Let's just hope she doesn't give up her naps now.:)
 
Let us know how she does:)
 
I had one who wouldn't take a binky, one who lost them all at once and quit cold turkey and one who would NOT give it up. With him, we took scissors and snipped them all! He thought they were broken and threw them all away! He didn't ask for any new ones though.........
 
Haven't taken the plunge yet....I'll keep you posted!!
 

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