Help! How to Get Rid of an Unwanted Host

[amy07]

I know this is going to come across as horrible, but have any of you ever had a host that you cannot get rid of? I did a show on Sunday, cannot wait to be rid of this woman!! I did host coaching with her which I think she took as a sign of trying to be friends, and quite frankly I'm sick of her. I'm so serious when I say that this woman has called me EVERY day, sometimes several times a day for the past 3 weeks!!!! Even my husband calls her the "stalker".

At first I thought that she was just unsure of calculating her outside orders, which it is my job to help her. Then, I thought she was interested in the opportunity, which she may be. But she does not want to do cooking shows, only catalog or online orders. Quite frankly, I don't think she is playing with a full deck if you know what I mean. She even went as far as to say that she would try to collect orders for me,hinting at a kickback for her, Uh No thank you. If she wants to send people to my website fine or refer people to me great, but I am not going to pay her, nor do I want to deal with her anymore! She's driving me crazy!!!! I just started my business, so I really want to make a good impression and be helpful/thankful to my hosts, but she is putting me over the edge!

We are supposed to be closing her show on Thursday, so I'm hoping I can break free of her, or atleast until her order is received and distributed. I know this sounds awful, but you would really have to speak to her to understand, and deal with the calls at all hours. I have even told her quite politely, that I do not like to call or be called before/after certain hours, and then told her the hours-----no luck. Honestly, she calls me and says "Hey, what are you doing", like she is my best friend. She leaves messages on our machine, "hey, its me........." never leaving her name. I guess I should know who it is since she calls so much, but I think it is rude. Anyone ever seen or remember the movie "Single White Female"?........that's what my husband says it is like.

Sorry for the long post........needed to vent!

By the way, my son is in the same class as her son, so that's how I know her to begin with. And since I'm just starting out, I wanted to line up shows that are outside my friends/family circle. UGGHHHHH!!

 

[PampMomof3]

OMG!!! I'm sorry! Do you have caller id? I wouldn't pick up the phone a few times but that's just me! I mean, if she has a PC question, fine but man, I have my own life too!!! Sorry!

Release......Breathe.......Release and SmilE!!!

 

[whiteyteresa]

I have a host that I call my Looney Toon Host

When she calls I will say that and the rest of the family will get around me and make faces at me while I am on the phone with her.

Her show was at the end of September and she still calls me.

a couple of weeks ago she called me and asked if she was doing something wrong with her new food chopper - it wouldn't chop her lettuce right

I have never heard of someone chopping lettuce with the chopper before.

If she can't get me on the phone she will e-mail me and have a 'Request Read Receipt' attached to it so she will know when I read it. Within minutes the phone always rings. I try to answer her e-mails now about 2 or 3 am. So far this works.



~

 

[chefann]

DH and I know someone who won't take a hint (or even a direct statement) about when it's too late to call. Isn't that the worst?Hopefully, you can close this and she'll leave you alone.Since it sounds like she's gung-ho about collecting orders and sharing the products, maybe you should sign her. Then she might get an idea about how much work you've been doing for her. And it will get her out in front of other adults. Maybe she just needs the companionship.

 

[raebates]

Wow. At least my stalker simply floods my inbox with forwarded emails.She sounds lonely to me. Wish I had a suggestion. Other than making sure to be incredibly aloof and ultra professional whenever you talk to her, I'm stumped.

 

[lacychef]

I feel your pain. My host from a week ago, called me everyday with a new question (or 2) from the time I gave her the host packet, until today, when her show was delivered.....can't really complain though....she had a $1100 show dh keeps telling me it's ridiculous with her calling though.

 

[cmdtrgd]

Are you up at that time or do you get up specifically for her emails?In situations like these you need to be kind but firm. Tell them when your business hours are and that you don't answer your "business" line any other time. Let them know that you would be happy to help them with their problems and concerns during that time. The rest of your day is for other items such as family. On another note, you can sell the lettuce food chopper lady the pink HWC nylon knife - it is made specifically for stuff like that and the lettuce won't turn brown because it won't come into contact with metal.

 

[lacychef]

On another note, you can sell the lettuce food chopper lady the pink HWC nylon knife - it is made specifically for stuff like that and the lettuce won't turn brown because it won't come into contact with metal.

OMG! Last night I had 2 gals asking if we had a knife that wouldn't turn lettuce brown...because someone had told them that TW had one! I didn't know that about the HWC one.

 

[amy07]

ok, I feel a little better knowing that some of you have been in the same boat and you are still alive! LOL
Teresa, maybe we should introduce my lady and yours!

 

[pamperedharriet]

Since it sounds like she's gung-ho about collecting orders and sharing the products, maybe you should sign her. Then she might get an idea about how much work you've been doing for her. And it will get her out in front of other adults. Maybe she just needs the companionship.

Try to see if she will sign up if she is so gung ho about gathering orders,etc.

Only downfall is that maybe she would be constantly coming to you with every detail of her business--over and above what you would like from a recruit. Which would be worse?

 

[amy07]

Try to see if she will sign up if she is so gung ho about gathering orders,etc.

Only downfall is that maybe she would be constantly coming to you with every detail of her business--over and above what you would like from a recruit. Which would be worse?

I've talked to her several times (actually each time I deal with her) about signing up. She doesn't have the $$, even with the applied credit. And honestly, even my husband says that I should be leary, that I would have too much of her then for sure. I've tried explaining that if she is willing to solicit people or cold call them, she needs to be doing this for HER benefit.......but you're right, it may be worse!

 

[cmdtrgd]

Let her know that you would be happy to submit a catalog show for her every time she collects $200 of orders or more. At $300 she can get a half-price item! Maybe that will take out the wanting kickbacks attitude because she will be getting product as her "kickback"!

 

[pamperedharriet]

Good idea Kate!

 

[pamperedgirl3]

I use my cell phone as my business phone. If I don't want to answer it, I turn it off. I don't want people calling me at all hours, waking my daughter up (nap or night time), or disturbing family time. Seems to work pretty well. I don't really use my cell as much of anything else--family will call it if I'm not home & I'll call my husband on the way home from a show, but other than that, it's mostly for business.

 

[MicheleC]

OUCH! It does sound like she is very lonely and maybe meeting other people through shows would be good for her. I would however be leary of signing her just because she could really up the number of calls! Know anyone in another direct sales business she might want to do a show for . Maybe someone you don't like too much....hehehe.

I would definately be firm on the hours you take calls and if she calls outside those either don't answer or tell her you are on family time.

 

[janetupnorth]

On whoever mentioned the read receipt on the e-mails send...just click no to them each time. You do not have to acknowledge a read receipt on an e-mail if you don't want to...it is just out of courtesy to others in business in some cases that you do. In this case, click no.

 

[speedychef]

I have a few recruits who I think are lonely like that as well. I had a LOT of questions and called my director relentlessly, and I TRY to remember that, but they call with NON-PC related things, and (not to be rude, but...) I DON'T CARE! Okay, maybe it is rude, but seriously, I don't care if you're having behavior problems with your kids, deal with it. If you have a PC related Q, I'm happy to help...I hate to screen my calls, but I see some phone numbers and just don't answer...

Which reminds me, do you all think caller ID is the bane of our existence? Sometimes I think so...

 

[Paige Dixon]

I had a host like that 4 years ago!!! who still gets on the call kick with PC questions. She always starts the call out with, "I have a queeeeestioooon for you". At the first show it drove me nuts, but I was glad she wasn't being a flake! She's not interested in being recruited, but I'm not really interested in recruiting her anyway. She'd really have questions then!

Anyhow, she's done several good shows for me, lead me to a recruit, and now I'd consider her a friend, sort of. Hang in there. Eventually, she'll need to return everything under the warranty and you can go in circles again...

 

[MGG]

I can't relate to the stalker calls, but I HATE people that put my business email on their foward list. I'm ok with the occasional foward from a friend or two but never ever chain letters or dumb jokes--honestly who has time!!!! And political messages...how ignorant is a person to send out a mass political insult and believe everyone will find it as amusing as they do. Anyway decided to vent along with the rest of you.

 

[BethCooks4U]

I never turn down a recruit but I would think long and hard about convincing this gal to sign. I had one that, while she didn't call me to death in between, called me constantly when she had a show with the same questions and I had to do everything because she just didn't get it and she had promises of whatever she evidently thought I wanted to hear. She was SO MUCH WORK (lots more to that story but you get the idea)! It's coming on a year from her going inactive again and I am not calling to remind her this time... I have blessed and released. Yours sounds like she'd be even worse to deal with.

I would not answer her calls and avoid her emails (don't reply unless they are specific to her show). Don't be rude but don't be available. If you do pick up the phone and she's there politely say that you are "busy and can't talk right now. Is there something urgent?" If she doesn't come to the point immediately say "I really can't talk right now. Gotta take this. Bye." and hang up.

If she keeps calling too late for you have your DH answer and tell her to stop calling at that time. People have to sleep!

If someone wants a return receipt your email should have a reply never option (don't know the exact words it uses but something like that).

Good luck.

 

[amy07]

Let her know that you would be happy to submit a catalog show for her every time she collects $200 of orders or more. At $300 she can get a half-price item! Maybe that will take out the wanting kickbacks attitude because she will be getting product as her "kickback"!

That is a great idea.......only thing is I am afraid she'll still be calling me all the time

 

[amcclanaghan]

Luckily I haven't had a Stalker Host... yet. But this thread has seriously made me consider changing my answering machine from the Default Setting to:

"You have reached a number that does not accept Unknown Numbers or Calls between the hours of 7:30pm and 9am Local Time."

Then if I'm not answering the calls of a SH everytime I can say "oh, your number must not show up on my caller ID"

 

[pamperedlinda]

......I have even told her quite politely, that I do not like to call or be called before/after certain hours, and then told her the hours-----no luck. Honestly, she calls me and says "Hey, what are you doing", like she is my best friend.......

My uncle had a problem sort of like this, here's how he solved it. He's a farmer and goes to bed very early, of course he also gets up @ 4:30 in the morning (do you see where I'm going....) He had a friend who always called him after he went to bed wanting to chat. He kept telling this guy that he was already asleep by that time and not to call that late - his friend could not believe that a grown man would go to bed that early.....until my uncle started calling him at 4:30 in the morning to chat! He told the guy "okay, I'm awake now, what was it you wanted to talk about!" After about a week of this his friend got it!

Not sure that this will help you out, but I thought it was very funny!

 

[scottcooks]

SOLUTION:

Folks like that are clingy because they can be. Easy solution which they will 'get' within a few minutes, is a broken record.

They are playing a mental 'tape' that you are friendly and want them and their energies. So - you need to install a 'new tape' that is you saying something like...

"Thanks, Dilly for your interest in Pampered Chef. I am decluttering my life and now aim my customer concerns to my email which is [email protected] . I look forward to serving you from there."

For extra "umph", set your PC timer for 10 seconds, have it handy when she calls again, and say - Oops! Gotta go...brownies are done. Take care, bye!

Good luck; you are in our prayers! God Bless.

 

[raebates]

Kate has a wonderful idea. Of course, this would mean continued contact with her.

 

[sailortena]

I am sorry this woman is really annoying you. Here is my two cents (if you think it's worth it at all.)
Since you have a business relationship with this host, at least until her orders are delivered and distributed, I would proceed with still being friendly and answering her questions.To help you avoid her annoying multiple phone calls daily, you'll probably have to screen your calls (if you have caller ID or not, I don't know.) And then pick a certain time during the day you will call her back. (Say if she calls you five times today, and you only call her back at 6 p.m., and she continues to call at 8:30 and 9 and such ... don't call her back until 6 p.m. the next day.)For those "kickbacks" she is offering ... if she does bring you business, like someone else mentioned, offer to submit those catalog shows and such for her and offer a small gift for her trouble, but I wouldn't go farther than that. If she continues to bombard you and such with calls, be nice but firm that your PC calls are only done a certain time of the day and if she needs help with PC stuff only, to contact you during that time.I'm just saying, don't burn any bridges because you never know what you will have. I have one host like that, though she is very nice, call me lots of times. However I have not decided to close the door on her because she has brought me almost $2000 in business and more than three bookings.

 

[raebates]

Oh, yeah, don't burn those bridges. Maybe just turn this one into a draw bridge.

 

[chefann]

Oh, yeah, don't burn those bridges. Maybe just turn this one into a draw bridge.

Great analogy!

 

[amy07]

OMG! This is the newest with this woman........we set today as the date to close her show. Well.......of course, she's had a lot come up (mortgage...last time I checked it was the same day EVERY month, and only 1 check left), and now her checking account is all messed up, so she wants to know if I will "spot" her what she owes for her order until next week!!!! I've tried explaining that some of her guests ordered the stoneware, and that I NEED to submit this so that they can get the sale price. Seeing how the month ends on Wednesday, I will allow her to wait until then to close, but that I cannot "spot" her order. This is the best part........she only owes $12.94!!!!

 

[pamperedharriet]

What a winner!!!!!!!!

 

[dannyzmom]

oy vey!!!
I wouldn't spot her a dime...and if I ended up spotting her i'd have it shipped to MY house and hold it til she pays up.

 

[crazy4dabug]

yeah...do not "spot" her..you'll never see your money again. Even though it's not much. I'd give her till tomorrow or MONDAY at the latest telling her that you would hate to have to call her friends and cancel the orders.
That might kick her butt into gear. She does sound very lonely but you've got to hold your stance because she also sounds like someone who takes advantage of every situation to THEIR advantage.
Be firm but polite and do not give up....when she see's she's not getting any friendship OR leway she'll give up and move on to her next victim of circumstance. LOL

 

[amcclanaghan]

oy vey!!!
I wouldn't spot her a dime...and if I ended up spotting her i'd have it shipped to MY house and hold it til she pays up.

I've done that for a friend of mine. You really have to be careful about doing that. I had her order for over a month and came very close to keeping/returning the products. She wasn't happy that I wouldn't give it to her without payment; esp. since she came to my house to pick up everyone's order and didn't get hers. She understood why, but couldn't do anything right away to fix it.

She's probably got $12.94 in bottles or could collect that much if she wanted....

 

[crazy4dabug]

I had another thought....I'm famous for speaking out of emotion and then thinking it thru later....LOL!
Maybe spotting her would be worth it...here's how...
See, ppl like that whom take advantage of ppl and every situation to benefit themselves KNOW they are doing it. You also hardly every hear from them again when they've taken advantage of you....get why it may be a good thing???
So, you may have to decide what is more important...$12 and keeping HER friends happy with their products AND not having to have much contact with her....
OR
Not spotting her, letting her continue to try to take advantage of you in every situation, and possibly having to do it anyway because you'd rather not cancel her order and piss of her friends which may be potential clients of yours.

 

[amy07]

I had another thought....I'm famous for speaking out of emotion and then thinking it thru later....LOL!
Maybe spotting her would be worth it...here's how...
See, ppl like that whom take advantage of ppl and every situation to benefit themselves KNOW they are doing it. You also hardly every hear from them again when they've taken advantage of you....get why it may be a good thing???
So, you may have to decide what is more important...$12 and keeping HER friends happy with their products AND not having to have much contact with her....
OR
Not spotting her, letting her continue to try to take advantage of you in every situation, and possibly having to do it anyway because you'd rather not cancel her order and piss of her friends which may be potential clients of yours.

I think you and Carolyn are both right.......the $12 out of my pocket is nothing compared to ticking off everyone who placed their orders, and ruining my reputation right out of the gate. So, I've decided to pay it, and have everything shipped to me. And just to make sure her guests receive their items, and don't end up in her cabinets I'll deliver them. They are all in my general area, so it's really not that big of a deal.
You know, the funny thing is........she hasn't called me since asking this. Hmmmm.....

 

[ChefBeckyD]

I think you and Carolyn are both right.......the $12 out of my pocket is nothing compared to ticking off everyone who placed their orders, and ruining my reputation right out of the gate. So, I've decided to pay it, and have everything shipped to me. And just to make sure her guests receive their items, and don't end up in her cabinets I'll deliver them. They are all in my general area, so it's really not that big of a deal.
You know, the funny thing is........she hasn't called me since asking this. Hmmmm.....

I'd definitely deliver - you really don't want her coming to your house and inviting herself in!

 

[pamperedharriet]

I'd definitely deliver - you really don't want her coming to your house and inviting herself in!

Oh, what a thought Becky--that's all she needs!

 

[amy07]

I'd definitely deliver - you really don't want her coming to your house and inviting herself in!

Good grief.......... I would go crazy if she started stopping by........I LOVE my house, but I do believe I would want to move if she started coming by!! Thanks to all of you for your suggestions, sharing your horror stories, and just letting me get it out!

 

[lizcooks4u]

I don't mean to...

I know this is going to come across as horrible, but have any of you ever had a host that you cannot get rid of? I did a show on Sunday, cannot wait to be rid of this woman!! I did host coaching with her which I think she took as a sign of trying to be friends, and quite frankly I'm sick of her. I'm so serious when I say that this woman has called me EVERY day, sometimes several times a day for the past 3 weeks!!!! Even my husband calls her the "stalker".

At first I thought that she was just unsure of calculating her outside orders, which it is my job to help her. Then, I thought she was interested in the opportunity, which she may be. But she does not want to do cooking shows, only catalog or online orders. Quite frankly, I don't think she is playing with a full deck if you know what I mean. She even went as far as to say that she would try to collect orders for me,hinting at a kickback for her, Uh No thank you. If she wants to send people to my website fine or refer people to me great, but I am not going to pay her, nor do I want to deal with her anymore! She's driving me crazy!!!! I just started my business, so I really want to make a good impression and be helpful/thankful to my hosts, but she is putting me over the edge!

We are supposed to be closing her show on Thursday, so I'm hoping I can break free of her, or atleast until her order is received and distributed. I know this sounds awful, but you would really have to speak to her to understand, and deal with the calls at all hours. I have even told her quite politely, that I do not like to call or be called before/after certain hours, and then told her the hours-----no luck. Honestly, she calls me and says "Hey, what are you doing", like she is my best friend. She leaves messages on our machine, "hey, its me........." never leaving her name. I guess I should know who it is since she calls so much, but I think it is rude. Anyone ever seen or remember the movie "Single White Female"?........that's what my husband says it is like.

Sorry for the long post........needed to vent!

By the way, my son is in the same class as her son, so that's how I know her to begin with. And since I'm just starting out, I wanted to line up shows that are outside my friends/family circle. UGGHHHHH!!

but this post has me laughing so hard I"m crying (good since my head is hurting all day

I don't have any advice, but I am sorry for you too. It may not be nice, but sure is funny!!! (not laughing at you but with you
Liz

 

[letscook04]

I think you and Carolyn are both right.......the $12 out of my pocket is nothing compared to ticking off everyone who placed their orders, and ruining my reputation right out of the gate. So, I've decided to pay it, and have everything shipped to me. And just to make sure her guests receive their items, and don't end up in her cabinets I'll deliver them. They are all in my general area, so it's really not that big of a deal.
You know, the funny thing is........she hasn't called me since asking this. Hmmmm.....

Yes, I'd definitely deliver.

 

[klsnyder]

I would not spot her the money. I would close her order out without the $12 item. Then I would either deliver, or have a meet up place with the other guests!

 

[DebbieSAChef]

Spot the moneyI would spot the money. It's only $12. If she doesn't pay, you can always hang on to the item for yourself, because I'm sure she got a discount and host benefits for these items, or you can ship it back for a refund.
Either way your show doesn't get messed up and your guests will be happy. Since you are spotting her the money, definitely ship the items to your home and make deliveries to the other guests.
Meeting people in person to deliver is a good way to thank them and to ask them about hosting their own show. Unfortunately she may be a guest at their show!!!
But that won't be the same as all the communication needed to host coach.
Also if you make your own deliveries, it's one less time you have to meet up with the stalker!!
Debbie

 

[ChefLisa]

Oh, my sarcastic side is now coming out.

I think I will go to Wal-mart later today and bring up a $12.00 item to the check out and ask them to spot me for it until next week. Or maybe I will go onto Amazon.com and ask them to spot me for a book I want.

I just don't think spotting a host is appropriate, unless she/he is a very close friend. Then it is a friend helping a friend. If she needs help paying, she should be asking one of her friends, not you.

Lisa

 

[Rebeccascabinet]

I just don't think spotting a host is appropriate, unless she/he is a very close friend. Then it is a friend helping a friend. If she needs help paying, she should be asking one of her friends, not you.

Lisa

Unfortunately it sounds like she considers Amy her close friend!

 

[DebbieSAChef]

For the sake of guests

Oh, my sarcastic side is now coming out.

I think I will go to Wal-mart later today and bring up a $12.00 item to the check out and ask them to spot me for it until next week. Or maybe I will go onto Amazon.com and ask them to spot me for a book I want.

I just don't think spotting a host is appropriate, unless she/he is a very close friend. Then it is a friend helping a friend. If she needs help paying, she should be asking one of her friends, not you.

Lisa

Well for the sake of guests and keeping a good reputation with potential hosts, the decision to either delete the order (which may cause bad feelings and anger), or pay the $12 and get on with the process of submitting.
Not that it would be your fault but you said she wasn't playing with a full deck! I would spot her and then just keep the items or return them after a week.
I would never ask a retail store or an online store to spot me, that would be ridiculous but saving face in the hopes of gaining loyal customers and potential hosts is another story!
Debbie

 

[crazy4dabug]

I don't think having to spot your host is appropriate either BUT when it comes to getting her off your shoulder and being done with the aggravation and making her guests happy I think it's worth it in thise case....for only $12 that is.

 

[luvs2sellit]

I would suck it up and pay the $12 for now and have the order delivered to your house.