Grieving Our Cat: Our Family's Journey Through Loss

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Discussion Overview

This thread centers around the emotional experiences of participants dealing with the loss of a beloved pet, specifically a cat. Participants share their personal stories of grief, support for one another, and reflections on the impact of losing a pet on family dynamics.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based

Main Points Raised

  • One participant shares their immediate emotional turmoil as they cope with their cat's impending death, expressing a desire for prayers and support for their family.
  • Another participant expresses sympathy and shares their own experience of losing a pet, emphasizing the difficulty of such a loss.
  • Several users mention the unique bond between pets and their owners, highlighting the deep emotional impact of losing a pet.
  • One participant reflects on their childhood experience with pet loss, relating it to the current situation of the original poster's daughter.
  • Another participant shares a comforting narrative about the concept of the Rainbow Bridge, which offers solace regarding the afterlife of pets.
  • One participant discusses the complexities of grief, noting that losing a pet can sometimes be more challenging than losing a human loved one due to a lack of societal support.
  • Another participant shares their experience of their husband's emotional response to the loss, indicating that grief can manifest in various ways.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ among participants regarding the nature of grief and the personal experiences associated with losing a pet. There is no clear consensus, as each participant shares unique perspectives and feelings.

Contextual Notes

The thread captures a range of emotional responses to pet loss, illustrating how individuals process grief differently and the importance of community support during such times.

Who May Find This Useful

Members of the consultant community who have experienced the loss of a pet or are seeking to understand the emotional complexities of grief may find this discussion relatable and supportive.

Long post warning...
On Monday I spoke with my son and he had taken Silky outside to lay on the grass in the sun and brush him. (Silky is an indoor cat). I was to meet my DS and exDH at the vet's office at 3 in a small city about 35 miles away.

About 2:50, I received a phone call from my son telling me that Silky died enroute to the vet's office. We all met at the animal hospital and grieved the loss of our truest friend and family member. A very sad day indeed. Eventually they left to bring Silky back to bury him at the home that was his too!! When my son is sad he gets angry. I wanted so much to hug him and have him just let it out, but he angrily told me not to touch him. That killed me. He apologized on the spot explaining that he knows he is being an a$$ but he just couldn't help it. When I left them I felt so alone at the time.

It was 3 hours before my party and I knew I had to pull myself out of this so what can be more depressing than losing a pet of 14 years? Shop for clothes. Please note that in the past 8 years I have gone from a small size to a large size and now hate to shop for clothes. It worked...didn't help my sullen mood, but I did stop crying!

The party went well and I was not going to mention what happened a few hours before the party, but alas....the host had 2 adorable kittens that they got for their grandson. One ended up in the medium sized SS bowl and I told him if he just ducked down, I could get the lid on and I could sneak him home!! The guests loved it and I was tempted by the grandson is only 4 and just a cute as the kittens so I decide to let the cat stay!

Yesterday my DS and I spoke and it was good again. Last night he found another kitten and he is the cutest little poop!!

Then my exDH described Silky's death on the way to the vet's. My DH did have Silky's head on his lap but he gave a few convultions, moaned 3 times and then his eyes became fixed. The fluid in his body released through his little nose and his eyes stayed open with a fearful look on his face. Very traumatic for my son. My ex DH told me that he was saying, if I only had held his head up, he may not have choked and he would have made it. He quickly was reassured that it would not have prevented his death, even by the 15 minutes we had before the vet's.

Time will heal. We can not wish Silky bad in the condition he was in. We have not replaced him with the new kitten, but rather the new kitten will help us move forward. He was already bonding with my DS and to the tunafish in his bowl! I say "he" but we are not sure. Personally, I think there is too much going on and it may be a "she"!!

Got to run for now. Thank you to all that are sending virtual hugs and good wishes.
 
Ann, I am sorry that you all ended up losing your cat, too. Prayers that God will comfort all of you and help you through this time!

{{{HUGS}}}
 
Okay- too many sad, dying kitty stories!!!! I'm so sorry for the losses of your cats, Cathy and Rhonda! I feel your pain and have been there. I will never forget the look in Gus's eyes when the drug took effect and he had gone to the big tuna farm in the sky...

However I cannot type any further as I'm tearing up and getting all weepy and that's no way to start my work day.

Prayers, strength and blessings to you all! It will get easier...in time!
 
Ann..........major hugs coming your way for your loss.
 
I am so sorry for your loss! I lost both of my cats this winter, two months apart. My kitty, Nermal, was 18 and was slowing down. My little Persian,Nora, was diagnosed with lung cancer and passed away two weeks after the diagnosis. My husband and I decided not to get any new pets for awile... but last did not last long. We had the opportunity to adopt a beautiful Siamese and a Russian Blue and I am glad we did as they make the house complete.

Just remember it is OK to cry- I am tearing up at my desk right now.
 
So sorry for your losses of your dear pets. (((Hugs))) coming your way!
 
  • Thread starter
  • #37
baychef said:
Long post warning...
On Monday I spoke with my son and he had taken Silky outside to lay on the grass in the sun and brush him. (Silky is an indoor cat). I was to meet my DS and exDH at the vet's office at 3 in a small city about 35 miles away.

About 2:50, I received a phone call from my son telling me that Silky died enroute to the vet's office. We all met at the animal hospital and grieved the loss of our truest friend and family member. A very sad day indeed. Eventually they left to bring Silky back to bury him at the home that was his too!! When my son is sad he gets angry. I wanted so much to hug him and have him just let it out, but he angrily told me not to touch him. That killed me. He apologized on the spot explaining that he knows he is being an a$$ but he just couldn't help it. When I left them I felt so alone at the time.

It was 3 hours before my party and I knew I had to pull myself out of this so what can be more depressing than losing a pet of 14 years? Shop for clothes. Please note that in the past 8 years I have gone from a small size to a large size and now hate to shop for clothes. It worked...didn't help my sullen mood, but I did stop crying!

The party went well and I was not going to mention what happened a few hours before the party, but alas....the host had 2 adorable kittens that they got for their grandson. One ended up in the medium sized SS bowl and I told him if he just ducked down, I could get the lid on and I could sneak him home!! The guests loved it and I was tempted by the grandson is only 4 and just a cute as the kittens so I decide to let the cat stay!

Yesterday my DS and I spoke and it was good again. Last night he found another kitten and he is the cutest little poop!!

Then my exDH described Silky's death on the way to the vet's. My DH did have Silky's head on his lap but he gave a few convultions, moaned 3 times and then his eyes became fixed. The fluid in his body released through his little nose and his eyes stayed open with a fearful look on his face. Very traumatic for my son. My ex DH told me that he was saying, if I only had held his head up, he may not have choked and he would have made it. He quickly was reassured that it would not have prevented his death, even by the 15 minutes we had before the vet's.

Time will heal. We can not wish Silky bad in the condition he was in. We have not replaced him with the new kitten, but rather the new kitten will help us move forward. He was already bonding with my DS and to the tunafish in his bowl! I say "he" but we are not sure. Personally, I think there is too much going on and it may be a "she"!!

Got to run for now. Thank you to all that are sending virtual hugs and good wishes.

Ann ~ I'm sorry that your family had to go through the pain that my family had to this past week. I'm sorry that you son felt guilty. My DD went through moments like that too! I think we all did in a way. When some neighbors came over the other day, my DH had a few drinks with the other DH and he finally talked about it. I know that this was hard on him too, him and I don't talk much about it, though by ourselves. But it was a healing time when the neighbor was over, because we were able to talk about the cat in better days and it was nice to hear both of our adoration for him. He truely was an awesome cat!
My emotions are up and down, and I just kinda numb, just a weird mood, but I know he's in a better place and for that I'm happy.
I wish my cat would have passed as quick as your cat! Our cat DID NOT pass that quick and that's the hardest part for me! That last 1/2 an hour of his life with him, will be permanently etched in my memory forever, and for me, that sucks! I think that is what was hard for my DH was that he was with him at the very end, I was not, I couldn't handle it anymore and he was convulsing like crazy and the "yowling" was unbearable, and that is why I'm glad that your cat passed quickly, because that is not a memory that your son would want!
I'm happy that you have a kitten that will bring you joy. The fact that we have a dog, has made it not so lonely and we have focussed a lot of our energy into her.
Anyway, slowly but surely the pain lightens a little and the memory of his death is not the first thing I think of. I actually keep seeing him sitting outside the screen door, meowing at me and that is a good memory!
 
You are all so wonderful. Thank you for the thoughtful, heartfelt words. As usual, everyone here rocks!

I don't think I mentioned the new kitty...Thor (although I think when Thor goes to the vet, it may be a "Thoreen"!!!)

He (?) is a tabby like Silky and he is the tiniest and cutest little poop!! I makes me want to become a Kat Lady and get another cat for my moody Moose!!! Thor can't be much more that a month old. Chris made sure that he slept with him last night. He was still a little skidderish, but was soon "marking" my son and responding to his kitty scratches. He looked more relaxed when he discovered the tuna fish in the bowl!!! Yum for kitties!!!

Silky will not be forgotten or replace, but because of losing so many young friends human friends that Thor is just what my DS needs to help him smile, laugh and look forward.

So let's hope for no more sad kitty stories and on with funny kitty stories!!! (which reminds me...Thor LOVES smelly sneakers and my DS knows he has to check his big shoes before he puts them on!!! MEOW!!!):)
 
I'm so sorry for you too Ann.

Kacey - thank you for your kindness:)! You always make my day.
 
pampchefrhondab said:
I'm so sorry for you too Ann.

Kacey - thank you for your kindness:)! You always make my day.

Awww- thanks Rhonda! :) that makes me feel special!
 

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