Frustrated With School Projects!!

[PChef_ang]

I am beginning to really dislike school projects!! My high schooler is always waiting to the last minute and my elementary kids aren't quite the age where the can work on them by themselves. We have 2 due at the end of this month. The 4th grader informs me that they are working on them at school, so I'm happy only one to focus on. Except I discover this morning that they have only been reading at school not doing the rest of it! Turns out she still has 3 chapters left to read. Now I do realize that I could judt let her flail and fail, but I have a hard time doing that. The 2nd grader thinks writing is the worst form of punishment in the world and decides to punish me in the process!! I guess I am not the best project initiator myself. I guess I don't know how to break big things down into little pieces. I guess I could of had the 2nd grader work on it in bits, but now I am just frustrated! Thanks for letting me vent!!

 

[cmdtrgd]

Awwww....sorry this is happening! Have you talked with the teachers so you know what is going on better? Sometimes it is hard to get the whole story from a 2nd grader!

 

[reba515]

Oh Angela right now this very moment I am feeling your pain !!! lol

My 4th grader told me a month ago he was reading his book report book in class, which I took to mean they were reading it AS A CLASS well guess what ??!! NOPE. so now he has a report and a story cube due on Thursday and I found out yesterday he only read 20 pages of the book !! OMG i am ready to tear my hair out !
I can't even tell you how many times I have said "go read your book" in last few hours !

 

[RebelChef]

I feel for you, Angela. I have twins and have been dealing with this for all 6 years of elementary school. They assign projects that are too difficult for the age and expect the parents to help or do the majority of the work. I finally told one teacher "Sorry, I graduated high school and went to college so don't be sending ME any projects to do." The stupid thing about it is they do the project, show it in class, get a grade and throw it away. It's a waste of time and money when they could be doing something that would actually teach them something.

The school here seems to think there's a law against informing parents of anything until it's after the fact. Asking to be kept informed means them sending word through the child which may or may not be relayed correctly. Oh and apparently there's a paper shortage so they don't send notes or at least not until the day before something is needed. Especially when they want food. We live 20 miles from town so if it's not something I have on hand, I'm expected to drive to get the stuff, come home and make it? lol They don't know me very well even after all these years. (I went to school here for a few years, also.)

Sorry to get off on this but it's a major pet peeve for me. Just know that you're not the only one who's having to deal with it.

 

[PChef_ang]

I just told my girls this morning that I wasn't mad at them, but just frustrated at the fact that I went through school and did my projects. I wasn't looking forward to committing the next 3 nights to get theirs done.....oh well, we did make some progress. We are 3/4 the way done with the 2nd graders. about 1/4 of the way done with the 4th. we couldn't get any further as she forgot the book at school. Can't do much without that. I don't think she'll forget tomorrow though....no book, no sleepover Friday!!

I am glad to see I am not the only one.....unfortunately DH is in a new job and has been terribly busy, so he has not been much help! Pray that we get them done tomorrow, we aren't home on Wednesday nights.

 

[JAE]

Fourth grade was the worst for this family. Biography report with a puppet presentation and Market Day including a commercial and keeping records were among the annoying projects that my children could not do on their own that year. I've said over and over that I'm not in school anymore. I've graduated and moved on! Anyway, I feel your pain except for the high school part. We aren't there yet, though I'm sure we will have the same joys. I think second grade is a great time to let things slide and tell the teacher that you didn't have time to keep up with 2nd grade homework because you were too busy doing 4th grade and high school homework! LOL

 

[lockhartkitchen]

As a parent, and a fourth grade teacher, I realize that the best judgment of a students' abililities is the work in class. I don't send home projects that the child can not do by him/herself. The assignments are memorable and relavent. I've been on the flip side, with a middle school student who hadn't read the book and the project was due by the end of the week. I've been to school and I feel punished when I have to hang over him all weekend long.

As a teacher, I send home a weekly newsletter that lets parents know what is going on in class and monthly projects (if any). Parents appreciate it. Fourth graders are responsible enough to know what is due and understand their teachers directions. Sometimes, as parents we have to let the child face the consequences. My son brought home a paper to complete about a movie at school. I found out he didn't see the whole movie because he was sent out of the room for talking. I could have told him what went on in the movie, but I rented it and made him sit and watch it.

 

[PChef_ang]

I know I would certainly appreciate a more communicated newsletter. I am probably just going to need to email or call the teacher. My 4th grader loses focus very easily and has trouble relaying what's going on with projects or pretty much anything going on in class. Does anyone have any recommendations? I knew she had a project due this month, but she had said they were working on it at school. Now part of this is my fault for not asking what part of it they were working on, but I guess it would have been nice if the paper said, we will be reading the books at school, and doing all the other parts at home. I get easily inundated with 4 kids, most days I feel like the calgon commercial
This too shall pass, and I suppose someday I will miss these projects
We will just have to wait and see about that!!

 

[JAE]

If the teacher communicates will with e-mail then send all of your questions. The teacher may only respond to one or two of the questions and then you send another e-mail for clarification. I have lots of experience with this. If I don't get what I want I say "When would the best time be to come in and talk with you? I'm not clear on this that and the other thing. I'm available....."
You need to be a squeaky wheel, and you have to get the teacher's side of the story. It's okay to talk to other parents with students in your child's class to see if you're the only one having trouble. If you are then you and the teacher with your child need to come up with a plan. If you aren't the only one with trouble then tell the teacher that you've asked a few other parents for some information and they are confused or missing info too.

 

[lockhartkitchen]

Angela,

Does your child's teacher have an organizational tool that your child uses? My class uses agendas. The students have to fill out the agenda daily and have a parent signature. Students w/o signatures owe recess. It keeps parents updated on things. If they don't. Require your child to use an agenda. Email is a great way to communicate with me at school. I welcome parents to email me. As a parent, Angela, request that the teacher send you a copy via email of any major projects. It helps to have your child complete small parts at a time so he/she won't feel overwhelmed.

It is very frustrating as a parent to find your child is far behind on something. Trust me. I've been on the other side of the fence many times. Uggh.

 

[byrd1956]

Truly understand. Spent way too much time on science fair every year of my child's school life....they were required to do a project every year and present. Many a late night....after 10:30 was spent w/all homework. My son could have easily given up any extra activity or instruments he had and would have still been up that late. Spelling words on the way to piano. Recording reports onto a tape to type later...etc. I often thought the teachers did not communicate w/each other on the amt. being given. The elem. and jr. hi. teachers I worked with always said it was way too much...of course that is another district. Good luck to all.

 

[RebelChef]

A newsletter is a great idea, Julie. I wish our teachers would do something like that. Since they don't even bother with notes, that's pretty much out. lol I don't go to school unless I have a reason but when I do, they know I'm not there to chitchat. I've called and tried to set up conferences and calls were not returned or they were too busy or had prior appointments. I've never gotten a response to an email I've sent. Just whatever reason you can think of. I have to go to the principal and he's a 'yes' man. He tells you what he thinks you want to hear and nothing ever comes from it. The superintendent is a waste of time.

One of my kids' projects were reports on South American Indian tribes. They've done these same type reports for the past 3 years. They were not told to do them any differently. The first time they had to type one, I taught them to use block paragraph style and there were no complaints by the teachers. This year, they decided this report would count in two classes...social studies and language arts. The first problem was the LA teacher counted off for misspelling Montezuma's name. I had to send back proof that it is also correct to spell it Moctezuma. The next problem was it wasn't indented. Well, hello??? Nobody said it had to be indented and nothing has been mentioned about it before. Block paragraph style is acceptable anywhere else but her class? The other teacher was fine with it.

This is the problem I have with teachers not giving written instructions on projects. The kids as well as the parents need to know exactly what is expected and not have to rely on memory. Elementary kids are not high schoolers. They still need direction and explanations. We all forget things. That's why I have sticky notes everywhere. lol They use agendas but the only thing ever written on them is 'no homework' or it's blank. I sign them daily and question my kids the minute they come home. Then out of the blue, a project, nothing written about it in the agenda.

Btw, Angela, I will NEVER miss these projects. :yuck:

 

[lockhartkitchen]

I started doing the newsletter when I started teaching 16 years ago. It's simple. The Lockhart News is set up like a newspaper with headings, issue number, etc. I just have to change to information in my articles each week. I send home a note at the beginning of the year that requires a parent signature. Parents sign that they acknowledge that my main form of communication is in the weekly newsletter which they know comes home in a red folder on Tuesdays, and in their child's agenda. The students write down their homework in the agenda. Missing assignments are highlighted the next day, so parents always know what is missing.

I pride myself in keeping parents informed. I had one parent complain last year that she had no idea their was a book report. She wrote me a note saying she was upset that I hadn't let her know about it, blah, blah. (Ironically, she had signed and returned each and every one of the newsletters over the month), so I photocopied each and every one and sent it home to her. I wasn't going to hear I hadn't informed her. Yes, I keep all of my signed slips.

My co-workers don't do this. They are great teachers, but they don't have the same number of students turning in projects. Out of 27 students, I only had one last month that had not completed our reading quilt. I find it is easier to form a relationship with the parents. I need their help. I never pull surprises on them. It's also important for students if they have a criterium for grading prior to the project, so they know what is expected.

Don't be afraid to be forceful and insist you are informed about your child's school work. If your child is behind more than 2 assignments, or is not making adequate progress on expectations, the teacher needs to inform you. No one likes to play catch up.

 

[pamperedtara]

:balloon:

I've called and tried to set up conferences and calls were not returned or they were too busy or had prior appointments. I've never gotten a response to an email I've sent......The kids as well as the parents need to know exactly what is expected and not have to rely on memory...They use agendas but the only thing ever written on them is 'no homework' or it's blank. I sign them daily and question my kids the minute they come home. Then out of the blue, a project, nothing written about it in the agenda.

As a former teacher, I am about to choke on these comments. I cannot imagine blatantly disregarding a parent like that or the consequences from an administrator if I had told a parent I was too busy to schedule a conference with them !!! As for written instructions, that isn't unreasonable to expect for students of any age (as ANY BEST PRACTICES RESEARCH WILL AGREE). No one can meet expectations if they aren't aware of what they are! As for the agenda, it should be a communication tool between school & home. If the school is requiring that it be signed every night, there should be measures in place to make sure it is filled out completely. I had several students for whom I had to initial their agenda everyday to indicate that the assignment was correct for my class. I taught middle & high school algebra, and I am certified as a K-12 principal & K-12 instructional supervisor so I am not trying to "blame it all on the school." However, in this case, it appears that you have very valid concerns!

DOCUMENT! DOCUMENT!! DOCUMENT!! then go to your administrators with very specific complaints & suggestions on how you can work together to best meet the needs of your child. It is hard to argue with hard evidence and legitimate requests. Just remember you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar. If you go in blasting them, they will tune you out from the word go & you discredit the sincerity of your concerns by your behavior!!

Sorry this is so long; EDUCATION IS ONE OF MY HOT BUTTONS!!!

 

[pamperedtara]

Lockhart - :thumbup: Kudos to you! It is obvious that you care about the success of your students! :thumbup: & you know the importance of documentation!

 

[lockhartkitchen]

Thanks Tara. I work hard and sadly have to say that I feel unappreciated. I spend more time proving myself worthy to my administrator. That's why I started with the Pampered Chef. No one pats me on the back when 98% pass the state math tests, but I'm sure to hear the number that do not pass the state writing. I need the kudos. I mentioned this to my administrator, but I still haven't heard the positives. I love the satisfaction I get from PC. Sometimes it's just being number one in sales, but it feels good.

 

[RebelChef]

Oh I agree. Unfortunately, they don't seem to worry about what the parents think unless it's the ones who suck up to them. We've had problems with this principal for the 3 years he's been here. Last year, I went to the school and also called him several times concerning bullying. I also spoke with the high school teacher since the superintendent wasn't available. The bullying continued until my daughter had enough and fought back. The other girl pushed her and she fell, hitting the back of her head. Shortly after, we noticed her eyes were twitching. After taking her to be examined, she was diagnosed with Nystagmus. (One of the most common causes is a blow to the occipital area on the back of the head.) She had to undergo an MRI and get glasses. This is a permanent condition and will possibly worsen with age. There is the possibility, although thankfully slight, that she'll never be able to drive. The school did nothing. They gave her ISS for a week. I was livid. She was punished for something they refused to take care of.

We've had instances of teachers humiliating the kids in class. My son was one of them. I told them it was illegal and if it ever happened again, to my son or any other student, I'd turn them in to the state. She made fun of him for making a bad grade on a math test then she told him she'd be seeing him next year. How funny that he ended up passing her class and carries an A average this year. He had an A average every year prior to her class as well.

Last month, I did turn them in to the state. For threatening to take hot meals from the students and giving them only peanut butter sandwiches. The reason? The kids were talking during lunch. The Dept of Agriculture and the TEA were very interested in that and contacted the school.

I'm telling you, I don't know what's wrong with these people. You don't punish a kid with food, you don't humiliate them for making a bad grade and you don't make it so they're scared to go to school because there's a chance they may be hurt. I live in a very small town and for some reason this school thinks it's big city. The school board members are all related or have been in place for 20+ years. The superintendent was the previous high school principal and she's totally ineffective. It's either move or deal with it.

Julie, want to come teach in Texas? lol We could use you badly! My sister is a teacher so I understand how you feel. Like police officers, it's an underpaid, underappreciated job and you have to love it because nobody I knows does it for the pay.

 

[pamperedtara]

Completely understand your frustration. I resigned right before school started this year because I just couldn't do it anymore. I am on a one year trial run to see if I can make PC a full time thing!! God is blessing me through this business & every time I sub, I thank Him for that opportunity. Subbing lets me do the fun part (teach the kids) without the painstaking underappreciated other parts. No angry parents, no grades, no tests, just me & kids on a learning adventure!!

 

[RebelChef]

you know the importance of documentation

I've nailed them on this more than once. Don't send out a note at the first of the year detailing policy and then try to go against it. I keep that info. lol

Sorry, my other posts have been so long but I appreciate your input and advice. Hugssss

 

[pamperedtara]

Last year, I went to the school and also called him several times concerning bullying. I also spoke with the high school teacher since the superintendent wasn't available. The bullying continued until my daughter had enough and fought back. The other girl pushed her and she fell, hitting the back of her head. Shortly after, we noticed her eyes were twitching. After taking her to be examined, she was diagnosed with Nystagmus. (One of the most common causes is a blow to the occipital area on the back of the head.) She had to undergo an MRI and get glasses. This is a permanent condition and will possibly worsen with age. There is the possibility, although thankfully slight, that she'll never be able to drive. The school did nothing. They gave her ISS for a week. I was livid. She was punished for something they refused to take care of.

WILLFUL NEGLECT is the legal term that comes to mind, provided you have documented your attempts to make them aware of the matter before the incident. I think there is a one year statute of limitations...

Your system sounds very similar to the one I left - for many of those reasons!! I was in a dream school, then we moved to DH's hometown! Tried it for 2 years, but just couldn't continue to be a part of something that I disagreed with so strongly.

 

[lockhartkitchen]

Tara I applaud you. My husband's business has taken off this year. I would really like to focus on PC and help in the classrooms without the stuff that goes with it. It's hard to give up $50K. My husband says, you only have 15 more years. Yikes!


rebelchef- keep being a rebel. You have to stand up for your child's rights. I had to LOL when you invited me to come teach in Texas. I stepped way out of my comfort zone last spring and applied to other areas. My husband had spent summers in Texas and really wanted us to move there. The price of houses really attracted me. I applied and was interviewed over the phone with New Braunfels. Where are you in relation to here? I didn't get it. I believe that God has a plan and sometimes I question it, but he knows best. There was something here he wanted me for.

 

[RebelChef]

It was definitely willful neglect. We chose not to pursue it because of the cost. I think they were scared enough when I told them if it was ever proven positively that was the cause, I'd have their jobs, their homes and anything else I could get and I'd make sure that school was closed until someone decent was brought in. My mom got policy changed at this school 35 years ago so I'm not afraid to stand up either. lol

I wanted to sub high school here. The former superintendent's secretary begged me. So I went through the course, did my proxy hours, etc. Never got called because I refused to suck up. Oh well, lol.

I love history so wanted to sub HS history. Funny thing, my sis got her teaching degree as a history major. (Btw, she was a HS dropout and got her degree at 44 with a 6 yr old thrown in there. :thumbup Our family thought we were nuts because that's what we talked about at Thanksgiving.

 

[RebelChef]

I'm in east Texas..close to Beaumont. Where hurricane Rita went through. :yuck: I'm from here so I'm prejudiced but I love Texas. New Braunfels is about 4 hours from me, close to Austin and San Antonio. I'm from Houston originally so used to go there in the summers to ride the river. It's a beautiful area.

Yes, the housing here is some of the lowest in the country. I have friends in New York, California, Virginia and the costs of their homes is just shocking. There's no way I would buy one if I had to pay that much. I'm too cheap and used to our lower prices. lol Fortunately, the incomes are on the rise here. After 9/11 and then the hurricane, it was hard for people in this area because things just came to a standstill. It's really starting to boom again finally.

 

[RebelChef]

rebelchef- keep being a rebel.

Not much chance of that changing. lol My nickname is Reb. My mother always called me her rebelious child and still does, as my hubby informed me a while back. Apparently they were discussing me when I wasn't around. lol

 

[lockhartkitchen]

I'd like to visit Texas sometime when I could have time to see it. I went to leadership in Dallas last year, but that doesn't count. Cound'nt see anything. I found you on the map. That is a ways from Austin. I don't do well with humidty. I focused inland.

 

[lockhartkitchen]

Keep the rebel in you. I've got to get ready for bed. By the way, it's late where you are. I just put the dog in the kennel after she blew air in here. 85 pounds poofing is gross. Take care.

 

[pamperedtara]

It's hard to give up $50K. My husband says, you only have 15 more years. Yikes!

I was interviewing for administrator jobs when I decided to quit, so I feel your pain!! We seem to be living parallel lives, I would love to talk to you sometime. DH had a great year last year that provided us the cushion for me to take this trial run! We saw that as God's way of saying, "What is your excuse now?" Should I return, I will have about 15 years to retirement! I can't even begin to explain the improvement in my health, my outlook, & my home since making that decision, so I am trying hard to make this work! My leap of faith has paid dividends, but only you can answer what God's call is for your life right now. In the meantime, keep doing what your doing. You may never know the impact that you have had on some of those lives, but be assured that they, too, know you are special!!

I think I have now participated in my first official thread HI-JACK! Sorry!

 

[RebelChef]

The humidity is rough sometimes but not too bad in some areas. Dallas didn't give you much chance to see the real Texas. There's so much to do here that we rarely leave the state when we vacation. Not that that's often. lol

Enjoyed the chat. I'm a night owl so I'll be up for a bit more. Goodnight and sweet dreams.

 

[RebelChef]

lol Tara, you did good but you're not the only one to blame! Nice hijack.

 

[PChef_ang]

Project update----both done!! :sing: It wasn't pretty at moments. :cry: we can not do this again!! I have soooo learned a lesson. My 4th grader has an agenda that her homework lists get written on and papers for projects do get sent home. I tend to be very anal about making sure I read all their papers, etc. I guess the next time a project is due I wll jsut email the teacher and ask if any of it is being done at school. I have a severe all or none issue:blushing: . So i guess when my DD said they were working on it at school I took it as all of it. The all or none thing makes it difficult in my PC business. I am either doing really well for me or nothing. I am working on trying to be more in the doing pretty good to rockin' it side!!

Thanks to Julie for all your input---if you weren't in Oregon, I'd look into open enrollment!!

 

[lockhartkitchen]

Congrats Angela! Kudos to you. Let us know what grade you get. LOL.

 

[JAE]

Congrats Angela! Kudos to you. Let us know what grade you get. LOL.

That's funny. I always say "We got an A (or whatever)!"

 

[RebelChef]

Good job, Angela! Glad to see you got that out of the way with most of your sanity left. I sometimes think parenting should count as continuing ed credits. lol

 

[PChef_ang]

Quick update for anyone who may be interested. We, I mean she received a 93%!! :sing: Now for this month's project. We received the paper for it last week. I went to the library on Wedenesday to get a book for it. DD takes it to school on Thursday and it was not long enough! :yuck: So back to the library on Saturday and now we pray that this book gets approoved and that my DD who gets off track easily can read this 85 page book in time for us to get the poster done a few days before the deadline instead of the night before. Keep your fingers crossed. Only 3 more projects to go after this one for the school year!!

 

[dianevill]

This is the first time I've read this thread, and I just wanted to say that you all made me take a moment to send a note of appreciation to my 2nd grade daughter's teacher. She is so wonderful, and really, really has the kids' best interests at heart. She sends home a weekly newsletter that tells what they'll be covering for the week (and bolds any work that will be coming home in addition to the every day homework). Plus, each Monday she sends home a personal note, detailing something positive or maybe an area in which Elyse needs help. She also reiterates projects that need to be done. There is a space for me to respond and initial. It is so nice to be kept on top of things, and not have those surprises waiting for me at 7:00 at night!

Thank you all again for helping me to appreciate her teacher!

 

[PChef_ang]

What a blessing she must be to your family!!

 

[dianevill]

She really is a blessing. This is the first year that my daughter actually WANTS to go to school. Elyse and her teacher have really connected - they even e-mail each other in the mornings before school and on weekends. Elyse was never "behind", more of an average student, but she has really excelled this year and is now in the advanced reading and writing groups. I completely credit the teacher, because she makes Elyse want to learn, and the teacher communicates with me to let me know how to help. I pray that I can only be so lucky next year.

 

[RebelChef]

Congrats, Angela! Y'all made a great grade.

3 more after this one??? There are only 3 months left for the year. Sheesh!

 

[RebelChef]

Diane, that's too cute that they email each other. My kids come home saying they'll be so glad when the year is over so they never have to see their teachers again. lol But then again, I'll be glad not to have to see them again either.