Should I send this reply to my AD?

[finley1991]

She's clearly bent over the "break up" and now the demotion. I'd e-mail her and tell her that you see where she is coming from and that you'll find hospitality for her. And leave it at that.

 

[dannyzmom]

Our HO Sales Manager is Angela Arico - not sure of the spelling though.

That name sounds familar...maybe it's her.
I just emailed HO to find out who my SM is and to get her contact info.

 

[PampMomof3]

Obviously she's pi**ed off that you decided to hold your own. It sounds like she had self esteem issues and she's taken them out on you. I wouldn't even let me new girl attend b/c she'll be such a b**ch to her and we would all hate that!

Is the SM Linda Bowles?

 

[dannyzmom]

Wow, she really is PO'd at you!

yeah, ya think???

So, are looking for a polite way to tell her to "f*** off"? Cause, there really isn't one ya know.

Honestly, as much as that is my style (to tell someone to f*** off)...I really just feel for her. She is so broken and damaged.

Seriously, she is still stinging from you seperating your monthly meetings from her and she wants to hurt you. She can't see past her own selfishness and that what she is really doing is cutting off her nose to spite her face. Request hospitality and be done with her.

And I agree with the others who have said that you should let your NED know what is going on. Do not let her have the upper hand. Hold your ground and take the high road.

 

[Mel5497]

One last thing...and I may be posting too late...when you send any emails to anyone about this gal, always be prepared for her to end up seeing them.

(There's no such thing as a private email.)

 

[Mel5497]

Carolyn and Morfia, I went to college for a year on Lon-Gisland...does that give me a temporary Jersey pass? (Yeah, I know it's in New York...but most of the students were from New Jersey.)

 

[ChefLoriG]

I think you are going about it the right way by cc'ing your NED, and I would also work on finding hospitality for your new girl, don't want your director "poisoning" her

 

[dannyzmom]

Carolyn and Morfia, I went to college for a year on Lon-Gisland...does that give me a temporary Jersey pass? (Yeah, I know it's in New York...but most of the students were from New Jersey.)

Yeah - i think that qualifies ya.
:::: passing the hair spray:::::

 

[pamela]

my Mom is from Jersey....can I have the teasing comb please?

 

[BethCooks4U]

Carolyn, like I said in our call this morning - I have no Jersey connections (well.. my BIL lives in New York and DH has other family in CT but that's the closest) but I have some of those same inclinations (wanting to get my feelings stated...). And as you said, you're rubbing off on me too so I want in the club!

 

[MORFIA]

i used laquer--not hairspray--and boy did i have BIG hair

 

[pamperedlinda]

I'm not from Jersey and heve never been to Jersey - but I bet this southern gal could have given your big hair some competition! I was so much taller in the 80's

 

[BethCooks4U]

I drove through Jersey once when I was going to or from NY. So I HAVE been there! It counts.

 

[Koolotus]

EEEK! It kills me how many questionable people have become upper level directors in PC> I can't even imagine how! That being said it seems like you have gotten some sound advice. CC your upline let them deal with her and treat her like a pit bull...never leave her alone around your kids!

My team is like that also, they will not be around my AD. I love her and forgive her the flaws, but truly she is not healthy around new consultants. From your posts I think your new girl would happily drive the hour to you to escape her meetings.
No biggie in NEPA, I drive an hour to grocery shop!

Please keep us posted and know that it will be ok

 

[dannyzmom]

Heard back from NED today - a brief email saying I should either go do all my own meetings or suck it up and go bak to AD. She says she (NED) understands my points perfectly but that obviously AD does not.
So, it's basically a bless and release...pretty much what ya'll concluded this morning.

My fingers are SO itching to email SOMETHING to AD like what Meg and Morfia said earlier today...

Meg said "tell her "I will find D that won't mind helping my new person since it seems to be a problem for you".....not exactly polite, but I bet it gets the point across!"

...Morfia said "thanks for being honest I still get confused on who supports who sometimes thanks for MAKING IT CLEAR--"

Tips? Suggestions?

 

[pamperedlinda]

I think it would tick her off more if you just ignored her. She wants you to be mad and she wants you to respond to her - I don't think she'd even care if you were groveling or telling her off - she wants you to do one of those. If you ignore her then you have won. kwim

 

[BethCooks4U]

I think it would tick her off more if you just ignored her. She wants you to be mad and she wants you to respond to her - I don't think she'd even care if you were groveling or telling her off - she wants you to do one of those. If you ignore her then you have won. kwim

I totally agree. Ignore her completely.


I would WANT to tell her those things but you be the adult here.

 

[Koolotus]

...Morfia said "thanks for being honest I still get confused on who supports who sometimes thanks for MAKING IT CLEAR--"

Tips? Suggestions?

I personally like Morfia's! :devil:

But honestly Linda & Beth are right, she needs attention and she thinks she can get it from you.
Bless and tell her to &*%$#! Off (oops, I meant release!)

 

[dannyzmom]

Yeah - you're all right, I know. I always tell my sons "just ignore him and then you win" but they always give in and start fighting back.
I am feelingn like them right now.
But Mommmmmm!! I cannnnn't ignorrrrre herrrrrrr!!!!

 

[pamperedlinda]

Does she have monthly director meetings that you attend? Or do you both attend the same meetings with another upper level director? Is there any upcoming situation that will require the two of you to be in the same room? If you won't be able to ignore her then, you need a good comeback when she asks how your recruit is or if she asks what you arranged for your recruit. Be sure you have a good one that will let her know you don't NEED her. Hopefully one that will leave her with nothing to say.

 

[dannyzmom]

Does she have monthly director meetings that you attend? Or do you both attend the same meetings with another upper level director? Is there any upcoming situation that will require the two of you to be in the same room? If you won't be able to ignore her then, you need a good comeback when she asks how your recruit is or if she asks what you arranged for your recruit. Be sure you have a good one that will let her know you don't NEED her. Hopefully one that will leave her with nothing to say.

Monthy director's meetings?!?!?!
BAhahahahahahha!!!!!!!!!
SHE is supposed to provide monthly director meetings for her director team! BUT back when she had 3 directors, she didn't hold meetings but twice in my 3 years as a director...and now that she has only one director...well...que sera sera.
Our NED is next up the line - she holds monthly meetings (in TX) for her 1st line directors. She records them and sends out the audio. My AD has never shared that with me. Thankfully, another AD in our cluster has been kind enough to share those with me so I am at least getting SOME kind of training from my upline.

 

[dannyzmom]

Oh - but we ARE supposed to go out to dinner - our clusters together - in Chicago. I am NOT doing it - no way no how.
Another AD in the area has invited my team to join her team for dinner and I would much rather be with them - they are kind and fun and love to share & swap business building ideas!

 

[pamperedlinda]

guess that won't be an issue

 

[pamperedlinda]

oops, typed too soon. Go to dinner with the other folks - maybe you all will turn-up at the same restaurant - that would be interesting!

 

[cmdtrgd]

Don't forget about Exec Banquet.

 

[dannyzmom]

Don't forget about Exec Banquet.

Oy vey...:yuck:

 

[BethCooks4U]

Executive Banquet: Be polite (it's in your nature) but sit away from her if you have a choice and have fun with YOUR team and other members of the cluster. She does not have to ruin things for you. You let her.

Bless and TOTALLY release! (...and don't think about the fact that she gets paid for you and your team). What goes around, comes around. Why do you think she's down to one director?

Enjoy your dinner with the other AD's group! Have fun!

 

[ChefLisa]

WOW Carolyn! I am just catching up on this.

I hate that you have such an unsupportive Director. I really do not know how you feel because I have such a great Director.

You showed amazing strength and class by not sending the email to her. Eventually her actions will come back to her and she will lose her business. From what you have written, she seems to already be going in that direction. Meanwhile, your business is growing. Hmmm...be like her and watch your business disappear; or be like Carolyn and watch your business take off. I know who I would rather be like.

Because of your AD's personality flaws, you should be very glad she does not want your new person at her meetings and trainings. She or the others on her team would only bring your person down. She does not need that at the beginning of her business.

I hope you are able to find someone great to help her!

Lisa

 

[Mel5497]

I don't have anything new to add...but want to chime in anyway:blushing:. I agree with not giving it anymore attention. If you engage her, she will continue to lay on negative energy (or worse...ignore you), why have that in your life?

 

[pamperedlinda]

Seems like I've said this a few times this week to others, but it is true: Success is the sweetest revenge! :chef: You are already very successful (probably more so than she) and I think it truely upsets her that you are doing so well. She should be happy that YOU are on HER team because w/o you, she wouldn't be a director and she would not have the extra $$ and perks. She should be the one groveling to you! Take a deep breath and move on.