Making Progress with My BF's Son: A Heartwarming Superbowl Surprise

[candiejayne]

This picture may not seem that big of a deal to most, but after almost a year, I have finally made progress with my BF's son. He never really took a liking to me, I hear the your not my mom all the time line. It's really frustrating to me, but last night during the superbowl, he showed me a little glimse of love for me.

He loves to draw things, and when he does the pictures either go into an envelope that we "mail" to mom, or to dad. He has never drawn me a picture. I just had to scan it and post it. It's so darned cute!

It's me with a PC box over my head doing the "happy dance" as he calls it. He said thats how I looked the other day (SAT arrived). Now I don't recall putting the box on my head, but I sure was doing a happy dance! LOL

Its sort of hard to see since its done in pencil, but I don't care, its still awesome to me!

 

[babywings76]

Awww! That's so sweet! It's nice when kids do sweet little things like this.

 

[AnnieBee]

That is awesome! Be sure to tell him that you showed all of your crazy online PC friends, I'm sure he'll get a kick out of that!

 

[pamperedbybarbara]

I just got such a great feeling in my heart and chills...thank you. Thank him too from all of us. I know you have been trying so hard and I think this picture shows you how much he watches you and does have deeper feelings for you than you may think...{{{{hugs}}}}

 

[tlag1986]

I'm so happy for you Andrea!!!! It can be so hard to get kids to let their defenses down to love more than just their parents.

 

[TeresaG]

That is lovely.

 

[pcchefjane]

Glad to see a little breakthrough there! HUGS!

 

[gailz2]

Yes, so happy you have broken through his rigid barrier. Just remember how hard it is for children from broken homes. I'm sure he has a hard time dealing with everything.

 

[peichef]

So happy for & also for him. I bet you'll cherish that picture for a very long time

 

[gingertannery]

He is so blessed to have you. And you are making headway in his life. Your patience and hard work is paying off big. You should be so proud. Frame that picture and hang it proudly on the wall. What a wonderful story.. thanks for sharing.

 

[chefsteph07]

Andrea, this is so good...I have a 12 yr old stepson and we have had a rocky relationship since I came into his life when he was 4...just over the last year that he's gotten older I think he's respected me more and looked at me as someone other than "his dad's wife"...he started calling me "mom" a year or two ago and that means alot...
Your bf's son is still young, but it sounds like he's coming around! Maybe sometime you can do a little day just the two of you, take him out for pizza or something, that might help things along as well...

 

[pamperedlinda]

Great news!

 

[candiejayne]

Andrea, this is so good...I have a 12 yr old stepson and we have had a rocky relationship since I came into his life when he was 4...just over the last year that he's gotten older I think he's respected me more and looked at me as someone other than "his dad's wife"...he started calling me "mom" a year or two ago and that means alot...
Your bf's son is still young, but it sounds like he's coming around! Maybe sometime you can do a little day just the two of you, take him out for pizza or something, that might help things along as well...

We do do this now, it helps sometimes, and sometimes it makes things worse. Just depends on the day. Since I work for a goverment agency, we tend to have the same days off, and dad is usually working. We go to lunch and a movie. He gets to pick if we have popcorn at the theaters and pop for lunch, or if we go to mc donalds or something.

Tonight we are going to go to his wrestling practice. Before now he hasn't wanted me to go, it's him and dad's time together, but his dad has to work tonight. He was upset at first, but when I told him I could take him he was happy again. He asked me 5 times if I knew how to drive there. He's concerned I'm going to get us lost. I kept reassuring him that I can get us to the school, but he has to know the way in the building because I've never been.

I'm hoping this breakthrough last for more then a few days. Stuff similar to thsi has happened in the past, and it's always ended in a relapse. I'm really really hoping it will atleast last longer this time.

We'll see, but for right now, I'm estatic, and I have taken the scanned image and put it as my desktop at work! As soon as I put an office together at the house, I'll be sure to add the framed picture in there!

 

[Crystal Patton]

Good job Hon! I have a step-son who we don't see very often, he lives in GA with his mother, her boyfriend and his two half-siblings (both from different fathers), they live with his Grandmother. (Don't even get me started):grumpy:
It is really hard when he comes to visit, we had him for a week when he was 3, a week when he was 11 and a week when he was 12. He will be turning 16 this coming August.
I just want to encourage you to be as consistant as you can, provide a united front with his father and show him he is important to you.
My step-son knows that if he wants a stable enviroment he can come see us. We always welcome him with open arms. He also knows that we don't play the games he expects at home, which can be a double edged sword. LOL

PS Laminate that picture so it will last for as long as I know you are going to want to look at it.

 

[BarefootCook]

how sweet! progress!!

 

[raebates]

That's so wonderful. Thanks for sharing your good news.

 

[candiejayne]

uggggg LOL! I have to be the bad guy... dad is working so he can't do it. He came home with a bad report from school which means no wrestling practice, plus he didn't bring his homework home. So much for progress! I'm trying to get ahold of my BF to see what he thinks, but the rules are a good report from school and homework has to be done before he gets to go. OY! I might just take him and then his dad can come up with an alternate punishment for later. That's not being consistant though.

 

[chefsteph07]

Does he live w/ you guys?

 

[candiejayne]

Yep, he rarely goes to see his mom. Shes had some major drug issues and has been homeless the last year or so. She has friends she crashes with, but we don't trust her or them with him. The only time she can see him is if her mom or dad lets her stay the weekend so he can come for a visit.

We did get to go to wrestling tonight. His dad is going to change his punishment this one time. All was good until I had to send him to bed before dad got home, he got cranky, but he didn't throw a normal tantrum, so I think progress really has been made!

 

[raebates]

Steps in the right direction, even if they're just baby steps.