Do You Have Kids? Balancing Work and Entrepreneurship

[PamperedK]

I get this question a lot when I tell people that I have a successful PC business while working full-time at another job. I always get, "Yeah, but do you have kids?" or "Yeah but you don't have a family." Excuse me? My life and time are just as valuable as yours. Yes, I am single, but I am still busy! There are people on my team with full-time jobs, children AND a successful business.

I just feel so...insulted when people do this. I don't think they're meaning to be rude, but it really gets to me.

What would you say to this?

 

[wadesgirl]

"No, but I know alot of successful consultants who have children and do very well at this business."

 

[cmdtrgd]

No, but I have 2 cats, a husband, a brother in law, a house to take care of and a teen drama group that I teach. And, that is just off the top of my head.

 

[PamperedK]

"No, but I know alot of successful consultants who have children and do very well at this business."

You'd think that would work...I think I just run into negative people! I'm trying to be very positive and not worry about what other people say to me...but I'm finding that people are so self-centred that they think they're the busiest people in the whole world! They always have something else that makes them MORE busy than everyone else.

 

[PamperedK]

No, but I have 2 cats, a husband, a brother in law, a house to take care of and a teen drama group that I teach. And, that is just off the top of my head.

Can I just use yours and pass it off as my own?

I'm NOT that busy outside of my job and PC...except that I do 10 shows / month and have a quickly growing team to take care of...I have 2 of my own girls and then I help my Director a lot so I am busy...

 

[wadesgirl]

You could always says "That's the best part about this business, you fit PC around your life not your life around PC. Which includes your kids"

 

[GeorgiaPeach]

"No, but I know alot of successful consultants who have children and do very well at this business."

That's a great quote I'd also add something to the effect that that is what makes PC so great....no matter what your life or schedule look like, PC is flexible enough to fit it!

 

[climbercanoe3]

With people like that it honestly doesn't matter how busy you are they will always be busier. My sister-in-law is the same way. She is always straight out and I must always be on vacation or something.
I think just stating it like Wadesgirl said is best and then let it go. You will not be able to convince them of anything other than their view point. It certainly isn't worth your time! (Because you have so much of it. )

 

[wadesgirl]

When I took Step Up yesterday, they talked about the "normal" excuses people have for not wanting to do this. She shared how you really have to try to get down to the core problem. If they say they don't have time, ask them how much time they think it takes. Alot of people think we have to do 4-6 shows a WEEK! They don't realize they can do as little as 1 show a month or 1 show every other month. Once you get the current problem out of the way, tackle the next one. The director said one recruit lead gave her 8 excuses before they finally got to the real one, she was scared to stand up in front of people. But by helping them get past the off the top of the head excuses, you can find the real.

 

[janetupnorth]

I get this question a lot when I tell people that I have a successful PC business while working full-time at another job. I always get, "Yeah, but do you have kids?" or "Yeah but you don't have a family." Excuse me? My life and time are just as valuable as yours. Yes, I am single, but I am still busy! There are people on my team with full-time jobs, children AND a successful business.

I just feel so...insulted when people do this. I don't think they're meaning to be rude, but it really gets to me.

What would you say to this?

I don't think they intend to be mean but after having kids I understand their point. As a mother, it sucks up more of your life than you ever imagined. You can't do a single thing without accounting for the kids and/or who will watch them.

I bug DH a lot about the fact that someone calls and he can schedule something, but I have to "check first" to see if he is free to watch the kids or get a sitter or whatever. I would LOVE to be able to schedule stuff and assume he is watching the kids and make him check before scheduling, but such is a life of motherhood.

I also encounter many singles who truly don't get what it is like to have kids. Not that your time is less valuable, just that they don't get the above...kind of like guys don't. For those who have dealt with those types of people no matter what you say, they will always look at you as "having no kids", so you will have to use examples of your friends and others that do work FT and PC and have kids to fill in the gaps and relate to them.

If I remember right, 2/3 of my cluster has jobs ON TOP of PC, mostly FT. The number might even be higher. Many do both, in fact A LOT do both!

 

[sarahlegare]

I agree with everyone else! People will blurt out excuses just to try & shut you up! There are a ton of PC consultants that have children, me included, that LOVE doing this because we get to get out, when we want, cause we schedule shows around activities we don't want to miss! DS has basketball Tuesdays, so no shows on Tuesdays....

Answer their question with another question, like a PP said. You're busy? Me too! How much time do you think it takes?? Don't like standing in front of people? What makes you nervous?? I can help you with that!! Keep asking until you get to the real reason, then ask "When would you like your first paycheck?" or "So, are you ready to give this a try?"

Good luck!! I'm right there with ya! Having a rough time recruiting!!

 

[ChefClairissa]

I get this question a lot when I tell people that I have a successful PC business while working full-time at another job. I always get, "Yeah, but do you have kids?" or "Yeah but you don't have a family." Excuse me? My life and time are just as valuable as yours. Yes, I am single, but I am still busy! There are people on my team with full-time jobs, children AND a successful business.

I just feel so...insulted when people do this. I don't think they're meaning to be rude, but it really gets to me.

What would you say to this?

I totally understand where you are coming from. I always felt insulted when people would assume that I had a ton of time just because I didnt have kids. I started a family about 2 years ago and I find that I have more time at home now than I ever did when I was singe and working full time. Thats the whole reason I started PC. I dont know what people are thinking when they say things like this, but when they do I always remind them that they probably dont have less time, its just prioritized differently. And shouldn't it be prioritized around their family? And PC is all about that, so it must be a good match! Good luck and hang in there. I bet that as much as they love their kids and family, they are a little envious of your freedom

 

[Brandi2007]

Don't be too quick to judge... most people that I talk to are extremely judgemental at first about the business. They can't see how it can fit into their lives because they haven't tried it. These ones who see you succeeding may be interested BUT think that they can't have that success with children. Listen to them, if they express interest and the "children" are their only reason then show them how it can work for their lifestyle.

My daughter (age 7) has recently helped me to incorporate my family into my shows. She gave me a valentine last week. It is written in pink on a full size sheet of paper, it says:

"Mom, I know why you love Pampered Chef because I do to. It is so much fun for me and you to do. Love, Cassidy, your Pampered Chef Helper"

I have this letter in my 3 ring flip binder, I showed it at my show this weekend... I have a Mom of 3 that is now planning to sign.

 

[sfdavis918]

I bug DH a lot about the fact that someone calls and he can schedule something, but I have to "check first" to see if he is free to watch the kids or get a sitter or whatever. I would LOVE to be able to schedule stuff and assume he is watching the kids and make him check before scheduling, but such is a life of motherhood.

I hear you on this!! This is probably my biggest pet peeve. But you are right, it's all a part of motherhood. I am just looking forward to when the boys are older and all three of them go off for a "boys day" and mom gets to stay home and pamper herself!!

 

[sfdavis918]

Don't be too quick to judge... most people that I talk to are extremely judgemental at first about the business. They can't see how it can fit into their lives because they haven't tried it. These ones who see you succeeding may be interested BUT think that they can't have that success with children. Listen to them, if they express interest and the "children" are their only reason then show them how it can work for their lifestyle.

My daughter (age 7) has recently helped me to incorporate my family into my shows. She gave me a valentine last week. It is written in pink on a full size sheet of paper, it says:

"Mom, I know why you love Pampered Chef because I do to. It is so much fun for me and you to do. Love, Cassidy, your Pampered Chef Helper"

I have this letter in my 3 ring flip binder, I showed it at my show this weekend... I have a Mom of 3 that is now planning to sign.

This is so adorable!! It must have made you feel so good!

 

[cmdtrgd]

Use the CARE methodConfirm the problem "It sounds like you are interested but don't know how this would fit into your life, right?Acknowledge their feelings "That is a common question that sometimes I even deal with. I have a full schedule of other things that need to get done as well as things I want to get done.R (can't remember what it stands for...I'll see if I can find it) "If I were to sit down with you and work with you to find ways to fit this in, would that make you feel better?"Extend the invitation "Is this something you would like to try?"

 

[janetupnorth]

Use the CARE method

Confirm the problem "It sounds like you are interested but don't know how this would fit into your life, right?

Acknowledge their feelings "That is a common question that sometimes I even deal with. I have a full schedule of other things that need to get done as well as things I want to get done.

R (can't remember what it stands for...I'll see if I can find it) "If I were to sit down with you and work with you to find ways to fit this in, would that make you feel better?"

Extend the invitation "Is this something you would like to try?"

Kate - I have an outline from Maureen Kimmel teaching this at conference - I will get it and post it...

 

[vtodd71]

...but I'm finding that people are so self-centred that they think they're the busiest people in the whole world! They always have something else that makes them MORE busy than everyone else.

Hmmmmm... you talk to those people too? I get those people at my full time job and with PC. I call them the "people who think the world revolves around them."

 

[ChefBeckyD]

I don't think they intend to be mean but after having kids I understand their point. As a mother, it sucks up more of your life than you ever imagined. You can't do a single thing without accounting for the kids and/or who will watch them.

I bug DH a lot about the fact that someone calls and he can schedule something, but I have to "check first" to see if he is free to watch the kids or get a sitter or whatever. I would LOVE to be able to schedule stuff and assume he is watching the kids and make him check before scheduling, but such is a life of motherhood.

I also encounter many singles who truly don't get what it is like to have kids. Not that your time is less valuable, just that they don't get the above...kind of like guys don't.

This is so true.....and I have the experience of both sides of the argument. For the first 1.5 years as a consultant, I was married, but childless, and also had a fulfilling full-time job. I had no problem managing my PC business on the side, and even had 5 recruits signed and active.......then came baby!

It is a whole different ball-game when kids enter the picture - they turn your life upside down, and I discovered, for the first time in my life, what it was to be completely responsible for the health and well-being of another human. There are no more plans made with just yourself to consider - everything has to be seen through a totally different filter.

I honestly don't think that when people ask you that question, they are trying to offend or make light of your own busy schedule - but there is a HUGE difference, and they may just be needing some confirmation or acknowledgement that it can be done in their situation too.

 

[cmdtrgd]

What people don't take into consideration is that other family members can take just as much time as a baby/kids. My BIL has lived with us for over 5 years. We are responsible for MIL, too. Just cause we don't have kids does NOT mean that we don't have others to think about.

 

[vtodd71]

What people don't take into consideration is that other family members can take just as much time as a baby/kids. My BIL has lived with us for over 5 years. We are responsible for MIL, too. Just cause we don't have kids does NOT mean that we don't have others to think about.

Exactly! My mother has lived with us for the past 1 1/2 years and she acts like a 3 year old sometimes. Seriously though, everyone thinks they are the only ones who are busy yada yada yada....

 

[janetupnorth]

Recruiting from Yes to Maybe class outline...

 

[amy07]

I find that everyone has a different idea as to what "busy" is. I hear that I have a successful PC biz because I don't work outside the home. But when it comes down to it, we only allow what we want to do into our schedule. Granted it may be more than we can handle at times,but we are the managers of our time.

 

[sklay723]

You've got enough Moms on here already saying that it IS possible, so you can definitely use the line about knowing lots of PC consultants who do it all. I don't work full-time "outside" the home, but I do freelance writing for the local newspaper, graphic design for a local kids' web site and a couple of other odd jobs from home. I also work as a volunteer at our local hospital. And my DH is a cop, so his schedule is SO wacky. Life is crazy, but I wouldn't have it any other way...PC works around my schedule, and I love that because it seems like nothing else in my life these days does!!!

 

[PamperedK]

Thanks for the responses guys.

Here's another one I can't seem to "CARE" out of excuses!

She pulled the 'busy' line and I helped her with that. She said she's not a sales person, I helped her with that. She said she couldnt' get up infront of people, I helped her with that. Then the last time I talked to her it was just "no, I really don't see myself doing it." I do'nt know why and she won't give me more information. I know she's interested. she's asking all the right questions and she's starting to sound like she's more and more interested but when I extend the invitation again, it's "no, I really don't think I'll do it". What do you suggest?

Do I just keep inviting her to things and keep asking her periodically? I'd love to have this girl on my team - I think she'd be great and I really think she'd love it but I can't get there. I can't even get her to sit down with me and talk about it.

 

[cmdtrgd]

Tell her that you "know she's interested. she's asking all the right questions and she's starting to sound like she's more and more interested" and you want to know what scares her about starting her business.

 

[vtodd71]

Do I just keep inviting her to things and keep asking her periodically? I'd love to have this girl on my team - I think she'd be great and I really think she'd love it but I can't get there. I can't even get her to sit down with me and talk about it.

There may be another reason she doesn't want to discuss. Maybe her husband won't let her do it. Maybe she doesn't think she can afford the $155 to get started. Sometimes people may be embarassed to tell you the REAL reason about why they won't join.

Personally, I dont feel comfortable (yet) telling people about the business opportunity because people I talk to just don't seem interested. My director keeps pushing me to get people to join but I feel like one of those Jehovah Witnesses beating down someone's door.

 

[janetupnorth]

Thanks for the responses guys. Here's another one I can't seem to "CARE" out of excuses!She pulled the 'busy' line and I helped her with that. She said she's not a sales person, I helped her with that. She said she couldnt' get up infront of people, I helped her with that. Then the last time I talked to her it was just "no, I really don't see myself doing it." I do'nt know why and she won't give me more information. I know she's interested. she's asking all the right questions and she's starting to sound like she's more and more interested but when I extend the invitation again, it's "no, I really don't think I'll do it". What do you suggest?Do I just keep inviting her to things and keep asking her periodically? I'd love to have this girl on my team - I think she'd be great and I really think she'd love it but I can't get there. I can't even get her to sit down with me and talk about it.

Oh, that was so me!!!! For almost 15 years.....!!!!Just keep inviting her, don't PUSH her or she'll say no again and push back (if she's like me), and keep gradually showing her all the benefits and great things about the business. Casually remind her that you won't know what you are missing until you give it a try and you ONLY have to do 4 shows to meet your agreement. She may fall in love with it...ETA: It's that first step that is a doosey...like the first time you trust your full weight on a rope repelling and step over that edge...once you try it, it is a piece of cake!

 

[PamperedK]

Tell her that you "know she's interested. she's asking all the right questions and she's starting to sound like she's more and more interested" and you want to know what scares her about starting her business.

Why is it that I always know what I should say but I need someone else to tell me?

I'll try this when I talk to her next?

 

[cmdtrgd]

I'm totally the same way. What I have done to get better at it is 1. help here with words - the more I help, the better I get, 2. ask friends if I can practice on them - not other consultants and 3. just get out there and do it!