Remembering Grandma: A Tribute to Her Life & Legacy

[crystalscookingnow]

I think I'm typing this more for my own benefit than anything else. I know I don't post very often, but it feels right for me to send this. Sometimes, it just helps getting it out, you know?

My grandma passed away very unexpectedly last evening (Sunday). She was 69 & went to take her afternoon nap. My grandpa heard her take her last 3 breaths & called 911. They got there & rushed her to the hospital, but she was already gone. My cousin (her granddaughter) was one of the EMT's on the call & did everything she could to bring her back. She feels terrible, but there really wasn't anything that she could do. I went to the hospital & said goodbye to her after she was already gone. I really felt a peaceful & calm feeling come over me, like she was there putting her arms around me to comfort me.

My grandparents basically raised me from when I was a baby (about 6 weeks old) until my mom got back on her feet. There was even talk of them adopting me when I was 12, but it didn't happen. So, my grandma was more of a mom to me. I know that she's in a better place. She had diabetes & trouble with her heart, so I know that she's not suffering anymore. I'm just going to miss her so much.

Her arrangements aren't going to be until Thursday, I figure that's when it will really hit me that she's gone. We made all of the plans today.

She was my grandpa's best friend. He's so upset & so lost without her. Today (Monday) was their 52nd wedding anniversary. I don't know what he's going to do without her. I'm afraid that he's just going to give up on life so that he can be with her.

Please just keep our family in your thoughts & prayers as we go through a difficult time that's coming to us. I know most people in their lives have lost a loved one, but I haven't. This is so hard for me, I loved her so much.

I have a party tomorrow night that I'm going to do. I wasn't sure if I should or not, but I think it will help keep me occupied for a while. It's with my pastor's wife & church family, so I think it'll do me good to be with them. I know that grandma wouldn't have wanted me to sit at home. She loved PC stuff as much as I do! Her fav. thing is the exec. saute pan. She was my best supporter.

I'm sorry, I just needed to 'talk' if you will.

Thanks.
Crystal

 

[gilliandanielle]

I am so sorry Crystal! I really feel for your Grandpa... they got married when she was 17? They must have spent their whole lives together and I am sure he is broken without her. I think you are smart for doing your show- of anything it will give you a few hours to think about something else. Let us know if we can do anything!

 

[PCGINA]

God bless and be with each of you during this time Crystal.

Though each moment in time is held in God's hands, we always want more. There is no words that can express how yo feel - and none of us know exactly how you feel - just know that we, your cheffer family, are here and praying for you, your grandfather and extended family.

Do what YOU need to do for yourself and those around you. You know better than anyone who needs hugs and can give hugs. Spread the wealth and laughter of your grandmothers precious life and share memories....

Do your show fro grandma

God Bless you

 

[crystalscookingnow]

...I really feel for your Grandpa... they got married when she was 17? They must have spent their whole lives together and I am sure he is broken without her.

Yep, grandpa had just turned 18 (March 1st). Grandma would've turned 18 July 22nd. They had 5 children, 12 grandchildren & 4 great-grandchildren. To say that they've had a wonderful life together would be an understatement.

For you country music fans out there, the song with the lyrics 'One more day' I can't even think anymore what song that is, but it's so beautiful & so fitting. We always want one more day.

Thank you for your kind words, Gillian & Gina. I really appreciate them. We'll make it through. Just will take time.

 

[RuthV]

One More Day by Diamond Rio is the song. (((((hugs))))) on the passing of your grandmother.

 

[tlennhoff]

May your grandma's memory be a blessing. Go to the party if you are up to it but let the pastor know what is going on so if you find during it that you are not up to it someone can help out and I know people will understand.

Staying busy is good. You might also want to keep a journal with you for the next few weeks/months where you right down your memories and in a few months put it into a booklet to give your grandpa and to share with the family. Add pictures if you have the technology to do it, don't worry if you don't. Many find it theraputic to write down their memories and family members really appreciate these "memorial" books.

 

[yummy4tummy]

Crystal, my thoughts and prayers are with you. My step father passed a few years back and everyone was so sure that my mom would never survive without him. They had been together most of my life so he was the father figure that I had. She surprised everyone by her strength and ability to carry on. I know it is a little different for men. It will no doubt be tough to say the least but don't underestimate his strength. As for the "One More Day"....that was the song that I had played for my mom at my step dad's services. It was also fitting for them. Take care

 

[pamperedinAlaska]

Hugs to you...Tears come to my eyes as I think of your loss, Crystal. I'm glad you know you have support here...prayers too. I don't post very often either, but find this a community where sometimes it's nice to just "be here".

 

[PamperedChefDebi]

Crystal, everyone has given you such good advice on how to keep your grandmother's memory alive. I have tears in my eyes as well. I lost my grandmother last year in Feb. I had lived with her all but about 3 years of my life until I turned 18. She was my "Mom." I was driving to a show on Sunday and for some reason starting thinking about her and the events of the funeral. (I was in Germany when she passed and only made it home in time for the funeral, not the calling hours.) I found myself starting to cry in the car. It amazes me how fresh it feels sometimes, but I know she is finally at peace. She did not have a peaceful (internally) life here on earth so her passing was a long awaited blessing in many ways. We all worried about my grandfather as well. Both of them were (are) in their 80s. He is lonely but he is making it and hanging in there. I will say a prayer for your grandfather as well as you and your family. You will miss her, but remember all that she was to you and know she is still with you in spirit. God Bless.

 

[sslangley]

I'm so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. It's so hard to lose someone you love. Just always remember, she is watching over you.

We had a family friend tell us one time, when we lost our son, that we had accomplished something in life that he never had. We knew we had a guardian angel. Ah, sorry, I'm crying as I type now.

So always know she is with you. God bless.

 

[chefkristin]

I don't know how you feel, but I remember how I felt when my "Mimi" died. She was my right arm. I loved her so much and can honestly say next to my parents she was my favorite person in the world. It hurt a lot so my feelings go out to you. Only time will make it easier. The pain won't ever go away but it will get easier to deal with. (((HUGS))) My thought are with you and your grandpa.

 

[Morvin]

I'm very sorry. you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers.

heather

 

[jenniferp417]

Honey, I'm so sorry.

 

[ChefBeckyD]

Crystal,
I am so sorry for your loss - my heart aches for you. I will be praying that the God of all comfort will comfort you & your family during this time!

 

[nicki25]

I am so sorry for your loss. My grandpa (who was like a father to me) passed away almost 8 years ago. I loved him so much and thought I would never get over it. But God has a way of healing the pain. You will always remember her and your relationship with her and the memories but somehow God will heal you and your grandfather and He will continue to be with you everyday. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.

 

[raebates]

Please accept my sympathies. Each of us grieves in our own way. Let yourself feel it all--the hurt, the anger, the joy of the memories, and everything else. Do whatever helps you move through the worst of the pain. You and your family will be in my prayers.

 

[quiverfull7]

I will be praying for you through this very difficult time. My own father is in the hospital right now and living far away makes that tough... I pray that God sends you those who will be His arms of comfort and love.

 

[pamperedlinda]

My thoughts and prayers are with you at this difficult time. Take time to heal and grieve and reflect on your memories.

Hugs!

 

[janetupnorth]

Sorry to hear of your loss...my dad died one year ago at age 69 and I had to deal with it on the phone 300 miles away and I was the first one the hospital told and had to call my brother who was driving to the hospital, etc. Being an EMT, I understand your cousin's struggles. Make sure she talks about the call itself with her fellow EMTs or people at the hospital and properly debriefs and understands she did what she could, and it was all she could do and more than if she wasn't there.

Praying for your family as the hurt will be VERY real for awhile. I still cry when my daughter brings up stuff about missing grandpa...

Take care of the rest of your family and draw on each other during this time.

 

[rennea]

I'm very sad to hear of your loss. Take care of yourself and your loved ones.

 

[BethCooks4U]

I am sorry for your loss. It is hard to lose someone that close to you. I lost my grandmother last week too (her funeral isn't until the 31st) and I am 1000 miles away. She was like a mom to me too - always there for me but I couldn't be there for her at the end. I know she knows I love her and that's the important thing.

Take comfort in the knowledge that her memories will always be there in your heart and she is at peace.

 

[janetupnorth]

I am sorry for your loss. It is hard to lose someone that close to you. I lost my grandmother last week too (her funeral isn't until the 31st) and I am 1000 miles away. She was like a mom to me too - always there for me but I couldn't be there for her at the end. I know she knows I love her and that's the important thing.

Take comfort in the knowledge that her memories will always be there in your heart and she is at peace.

Beth - sorry to hear of your loss too!

 

[tlennhoff]

I am sorry for your loss. It is hard to lose someone that close to you. I lost my grandmother last week too (her funeral isn't until the 31st) and I am 1000 miles away. She was like a mom to me too - always there for me but I couldn't be there for her at the end. I know she knows I love her and that's the important thing.

Take comfort in the knowledge that her memories will always be there in your heart and she is at peace.

Sorry to hear about your loss. May her memory be a blessing. What a great attitude you have.

 

[crystalscookingnow]

Beth - I'm sorry to hear of the loss of your grandmother. She knew that you love her & would've been there if you could have been. ((((hugs))))

Crystal

 

[KellyTheChef]

Crystal~

My heart goes out to you...my Mom passed away in June and it is still hard. Allow yourself to feel whatever comes naturally. My brother and I (who are both Christians) felt that "peace that surpasses all understanding" that the bible tells us God will give us in times of struggle. Through the funeral and the weeks to follow, He was really there for us. For me, it hit me about FOUR MONTHS later! Everyone grieves differently, so just allow those feelings to come. Hurt, anger, disbelief, etc. They all come at different times...I really liked the suggestion to keep a journal of memories. Talking about those memories really helps too, so make sure you have someone that you can talk to!

My prayers are with you...wish there was something more I could do for you.

 

[KellyTheChef]

Beth~

I am so sorry to hear about your loss as well...she knows your heart and how much you loved her! You are in my prayers too!
((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))