Dealing with Difficult Hosts: A Frustrating Experience as a Sales Consultant

[jdavis]

Yikes, I couldn't even imagine what I would do in your situation, you are a far bigger person than me.

 

[pamperedalf]

Well I am trying my fresh start, December is a new month w/ none of these people in sight. When I talk about this, I don't have the anger that I did on Tues & Wed. This was a huge blow to me, & I am dredding Mon meeting because my AD wants to discuss how I run my biz. I think that is my last hurtle with this whole situation. I will do my best to ignore her and change the subject, one of her best qualities w/ her customers.

I think all & all the reason why this was so hard for me was, because I was feeling personally attacked by people who have given me nothing but compliments. I was also upset that the biz did not go to my dir, my AD is slimey and all about the buck she doesn't care about anyone. Although part of me doesn't want my dir to handle these people because I now know what they are truely like.

As soon as the meeting is over on Monday, I can really breathe!

 

[pamperedalf]

Okay I thought I was over this whole ordeal this week, until my husband said we need to go to wally world. I am like ok, dredding going knots tightening up in my stomach. Well the lady who made the intial complaint, her mom was working today. She didn't say anything but just glared @ me, and walked by my son who was pushing the cart and made a noise. So that pissed me off, so what I do I just smile.Then I see my sis, in the next line over and I go over to her to talk about x-mas, the host who started this whole group was behind her, saw me and looked at the ground avoiding eye contact.Can't this be over, I don't want to have to avoid going to Wal Mart, but I don't know. I don't want to feel uncomfortable.

 

[cmdtrgd]

Don't let it bother you. You did nothing wrong. Just ignore the looks and take comfort in the fact that the HOST had to look at the ground. Keep YOUR head high!

 

[lizcooks4u]

I totally agree with ANNE and NO I wouldn't include them~with al the trouble this grp has caused you there's no way I"d include them in the Christmas specials. Let the AD take care of them, after all she stole many from you already. They're fit for ea. other.

Good Luck and keep your chin up too.

Liz

ps: It can only get better, right?

Well I am still stressed, trying to resolve this. I was talking w/ my director today, they gave a catalog show that I was suppose to close today to my AD.

One of my past hosts, called today to cancel her show for Jan. She said that she might not be here in Jan. I wanted to scream and say that I already know you booked w/ my AD.

Then my AD wants to have a talk w/ me on how I run my business, and help me make the changes so I am not doing anything extra for my hosts. But I know she won't talk she will just be rude, and tell me like I am 6.

I finally got a hold of the host in Nov. and she said I will call you after 8, I am not going to loose my job being caught on the phone over you.

Now here is my problem, HO is calling the Oct. Host and offering her a refund if she wants on the roaster because it didn't make it in time, if she sends the roaster back. I paid $9.46 out of my pocket on an item I didn't earn commission to ship it to her because I knew I would be out of town, and couldn't get the pan to her. So I emaild HO to tell them to only credit her what her card was charged, because I covered the rest.

Then I was getting ready to send out x-mas cards w/ a 10% off coupon and thanking them for their biz. Do I send this group a card w/ a coupon, or take the chance that they won't find out. I just don't know!!!!


Thanks Anne, jrstephens, & jenniferknapp!!!! I am grateful, this stress is not helping me in any way. I just feel devestated that someone would try and get me fired from selling pampered chef. My esteem has been crushed and I need to get motivated in a new group. The bad me is thinking, well go ahead and deal w/ my AD she is rude and refuses to go out of her way for anyone. She starts her shows on time no matter what (this group never started on time), she snaps at people. Oh I could go on for days just over her.

Then when I go to leadership I have to listen to her go on and on. Thank God I don't have to fly w/ her this time.

Done venting for the moment, that has made me really hot! Thanks again for everyone's support. I am so ready to quit, I am just stressed!

 

[lizcooks4u]

Don't let those Rude people get u down~!!

Okay I thought I was over this whole ordeal this week, until my husband said we need to go to wally world. I am like ok, dredding going knots tightening up in my stomach. Well the lady who made the intial complaint, her mom was working today. She didn't say anything but just glared @ me, and walked by my son who was pushing the cart and made a noise. So that pissed me off, so what I do I just smile.

Then I see my sis, in the next line over and I go over to her to talk about x-mas, the host who started this whole group was behind her, saw me and looked at the ground avoiding eye contact.

Can't this be over, I don't want to have to avoid going to Wal Mart, but I don't know. I don't want to feel uncomfortable.

That's what they want, to bother you. I know it's difficult but "KILL THEM WITH KINDNESS" but don't include them in on specials either, just or even though it eats you up inside, don't let them know it. As that's what they all want. I wish soooo bad for you that you could change lineages, but you would most likley have to sit out a yr and re join

Why should you give up your income just to please these fools.

I"m even shocked that PC puts up with the Rude AD, etc. I've heard of others which aren't good too.

My prior DSA had been with a no. of other company's. I had wanted to join a PL lineage where the ladies were top in the country. Well I then got out of PL and went to TBS@Home. I got under the ladies who were top sales persons for Party Light and then it only took a few short months to see how they reached the top. Very sad and needless to say after tons of $ spent/wasted I got out due to my Director stealing my recruits, and right in front of me after driving them over an hr. ea way to her house. What a joike!! and much wasted time too, as I had been offered PC and turned it down

IF nothing else, it's very sad to say but you have learned alot in the short time. I really hope you stick with PC and I KNOW you'll do just fine!!!!

Take Care and God Bless;

Liz

 

[pamperedalf]

I have come to realize that if I quit, I am giving them what they want. Not doing that again. I am not quiting, however I am struggling getting going this month. I am behind on Homework, so I am going to finish that. Then make a fresh start on PC. I did sit down last night w/ my new planner and make goals for booking, sales, & recruits till June. I would have done the whole year, however their is a slight chance I might be prego. I doubt it but I want to make sure first. I do need to get busy because PC is paying for our trip to Maui next year my sis is getting married.My husband and I decided to sell our flip our house and sell, we have been watching a lot of shows on that. So I am giving ourselves 2 years before we can move.

 

[raebates]

Amanda, I'm so sorry you've been through this. It's never easy when we deal with unscrupulous people. It sounds like you are making a fresh start, and I applaud you for doing that.

As far as going to Wal-Mart is concerned, be like Nike and Just Do It! I had a different situation (not related to PC) but one with similar tension that took place a few years ago. After much prayer, I forgave them and moved on. I live in a fairly small area, so I run into these people all the time. I made a concerted effort to treat them just like I do everyone else--smile and say hello.

It wasn't always easy, and I often received glares instead of smiles in return. However, that was their problem. I once heard that harboring hatred (no matter how mild) is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. I realized that once I let it go, it no longer had any power over me. (To be honest, I had to release it many times. It seemed to be stuck to me with industrial strength super glue.)

Some of those people have started smiling back. Some continue to glare and turn the other way. So be it. Their loss. I am an amazingly fun person.

 

[AJPratt]

Rae, that is GREAT advice!

Amanda: Congrats on #5! Things are so up in the air with me, I have given up on going to Leadership (due to $ and timing) and conference is iffy. BUT if I am OK to travel, I will be there! I don't know when in the world I will be pregnant, but I'm just going to go with it and see what happens!

 

[pamperedalf]

Amanda: Congrats on #5! Things are so up in the air with me, I have given up on going to Leadership (due to $ and timing) and conference is iffy. BUT if I am OK to travel, I will be there! I don't know when in the world I will be pregnant, but I'm just going to go with it and see what happens!

I should probably change my signature, I had 2 kitnappers that went inactive. Too bad your not going to leadership, but you have good reasons enjoy that cruise. Maybe I will see you at confrence?I don't think I am pregnant, I took a test this morning and it was negative. I just wait it out, but can't get pregnant next month because then my due date would be right before my sis's wedding in Maui. Hey maybe we could be prego together, start our own group.

 

[AJPratt]

Hey maybe we could be prego together, start our own group.

That would be great!

 

[pamperedalf]

They're back at it AGAIN!Now my AD gets a call from the Jan host's mom wanting PC's customer service # so she can make a formal complaint against me, & my director because my director yelled at her friend for a half hour and wanted to know where her friend's cookbook was. So then my AD says no I am not giving you the #, I want to speak w/ your friend. There is not going to be anymore 3rd party complaints to the HO about my director.

My dir. is po'd because now they are attacking her, and they don't even know her. I am pissed because all she was doing was trying to defuse (?) the situation, and get this problem resolved.

Then I was trying to figure out why they are attacking my dir, and this is what I came up w/ my AD didn't defend me in any way, she was bad mouthing me to these people. She repeatedly said no she shouldn't have done it that way, she should have done it this way. Oh I wouldn't have done it that way, this is how I do it. She was very open w/ what she said. It's sad because she will do this to anyone, anything to make a $.
Well my director defended me saying I called 4 times, well my Nov hosts swears I dialed the wrong # and then hit redial the whole night. In this conversation my dir had w/ the Nov host my dir gave the host the 888 # and told her to call the company for 1/2 off items that she missed by not answering her phone, and to get her cookbook replaced.

Well obviously she didn't, and now they go to my AD to fix the problem. My AD was the one who said to just close the show, and pick her free product and send in the show. Well that's what I did, and now she's telling them that she didn't say that, and that my Dir should have taken better care of them...... So now my Nov host booked from her for Feb. because they just love her, blah blah blah!!!! Make me sick!

I am sick of these people, but what's worse is my AD bad mouthing me, so that they will love her. I guess white trash, loves white trash they are perfect for each other now can they leave me out of it. I am sick of getting phone calls on my cell while I am teaching to deal w/ their sh#$!

Thanks for letting me vent yet again. It feels so much better to get it on the computer.

 

[pamperedgirl3]

Amanda, do you have a voicemail on your cell stating the fact that you are TEACHING a class during the day & so you won't be able to return calls until such & such time? If not, I would do that first. (Then if HO happens to call that #, they will get the same message & know that the others would have gotten the same one.) I think I would have to speak to someone at HO & tell them how upset you are about these people. Find out if they can put a note with your # about these people so when they call, whoever talks with them will have a clue about how nutso they are! Do you know your AD's director? Does she know how this person acts?

I feel bad for you & your director with this group. I mean, if they don't want to work with you, fine, but why go to these lengths to ruin your life? They are the ones who didn't bother getting back with you to close your show among others, what did you do wrong? You could have sent in the show telling her that she didn't get anything free!

Good luck with this! In another thread you mentioned karma--just think what your AD has coming to her then!!!

 

[pamperedalf]

In another thread you mentioned karma--just think what your AD has coming to her then!!!

Is this bad, but I am keeping my fingers crossed waiting for the day. Maybe that's why, this is happening.I don't have a message on my cell stating I am teaching, however this whole group and my AD knows I teach during the day, good thing I keep my phone on silent, but sometimes the kids notice my bag vibrating. HO even knows that I most likely won't answer the phone until after 3 our time.I could talk w/ the exec. but I feel like a girl who is tattling. I have gone back and forth whether to involve her or not. I just want this to end.

 

[PamperChefCarol]

Amanda...
If you haven't done this by now, please put this whole mess on paper. One thing I learned from years in corporate America is Document, Document, Document. The more detailed you can make it the better, times, etc. Once you have that done, send a copy of you AD, one to your Director, one to your AD's Director, and anyone else you think needs to be apprised of the situtation. Plus, of course, keep one for your records.

After this, just close the file on this and move on to better things.

Keep positive, there are a ton more good customers out there than the ones that are "customers from hell."

 

[jentapp]

Is this bad, but I am keeping my fingers crossed waiting for the day. Maybe that's why, this is happening.

I don't think it's bad at all, to be honest. I would definitely go to your Exec and let her know what's going on. If nothing else, she might be supportive and can stick up for you AND for your director with HO.

Sadly enough, the people who raise the biggest stink are usually the ones who end up getting what they want just to get rid of them. With what you're saying, I can see these women bringing a lawsuit against the company and then the company settling out of court just to shut them up and get off of THEIR backs...or at the very least, having everyone in this crazy group call the company several times every day to harass the poor customer service people to death (you know that they're probably doing it, too, and how those poor people must be feeling). Like a pack of starving wolves who finally found a single rabbit.

I hope the mess all ends for you quickly so that your life can get back to normal.

 

[rennea]

I would do as said before and put everything on paper and then go as high as you can go........go all the way, explain what's going on and that you just want them to leave you and your director a lone.
If it was me (and I'm gutsy and don't let anyone push me around) I would file a formal compaint about my AD if she was bad mouthing me. She shouldn't be a AD but then that would be opening a whole new can of crap. That's what I would do. But diffently go higher up to take care of this problem.

Good luck good luck, sending good luck your way

 

[pamperedgirl3]

I would do as said before and put everything on paper and then go as high as you can go........go all the way, explain what's going on and that you just want them to leave you and your director a lone.
If it was me (and I'm gutsy and don't let anyone push me around) I would file a formal compaint about my AD if she was bad mouthing me. She shouldn't be a AD but then that would be opening a whole new can of crap. That's what I would do. But diffently go higher up to take care of this problem.

Good luck good luck, sending good luck your way

I agree. I would put everything on paper (always did as a teacher too, just in case a parent came back to bite me) & go above your AD. Part of her being an AD is to HELP the people she is "supposed" to be leading--not just looking out for herself. That's what she gets the overrides for. I would complain to HO or her director b/c you & your director shouldn't be getting all this to you--part of the reason these people are still harrassing you is because of the AD. She should have kept her nose out of it & said, sorry, but she is your consultant & you deal with her. I think she helped make the whole problem worse.

 

[pamperedlinda]

Definitely do as has been stated above and notify your upper level director/s and HO. This has gotten way out of control. You need to let your AD's Director know what's going on. If this person is as horrific as you describe, then there should be no doubt that her director is already aware of how she is.

One saying that I learned when I was at my corporate job "All those who remain silent are in agreement".....please do not remain silent on this. And rest assured, one of these days these ladies will "get what they give!"

I wish you the best.

 

[pamperedalf]

Sorry to bring this back up, but don't know what to do.....I received a phone call from my dir on fri asking if my ears were ringing. My dir tells me that my ad called our ed and chatted w/ her for over an hour about this wal-mart crew. I guess when my ad took a host packet to one of the girls, my Nov host approched her and asked for more info on the biz, because she wants to sign up. Well blah blah, my ad supposedly says that she keeps trying to refer them back to me to be ethically, and she doesn't know what to do. So she calls my ed for advice. Long story short is my exec said you can't turn biz away, & if they don't want amanda then do what they want. My initial reaction is I won't go to meetings.

Well my dir goes into a big long speil (SP) about how I need to be the bigger person & go. Also that if she has to invite them into her home every other month, then I should be there as well. IMO I don't need to be there because she has to invite them into her home.

Then she goes on about how I shouldn't be mad because I did parties & signed one of my ad's old dir's. When this dir quit selling she used to buy from my dir, well then a year ago this lady came up to me to do a cat. show, and ripped on my dir. Well then this year @ the fair she came up and said that she wanted to sign again, but only under me she wanted nothing to do w/ my AD. The way she was talking she was hurt, and I never told her that this cons. came up to me & ripped her to shreads, because I didn't want to hurt her. So then I told her what this person said, and I told her why I didn't tell her, I think she was shocked.

So she goes on more about being the bigger person, and says that they probably are just gonna be kit nappers. Whatever I am over them. By then I was giving her the blah answers & she saw it, and said you aren't even listening, I gotta go.

So the stupid drama continues, & I just want to be rid of this group completely. If they sign I don't want to go to meetings because they are only going to sit there & bash me. These people are complete white trash! I don't want to offer any advice, or to help them.

Then to make matters worse I am roomming w/ my AD & my dir in Dallas, & I can just feel that it's going to be tense the whole time I am there.

This also makes it hard because my biz took a nose dive. I need to get back out there & dive in full force. Sorry this is so long yet again, but I think dh is sick of me talking about it.

 

[dannyzmom]

I received a phone call from my dir on fri asking if my ears were ringing. My dir tells me that my ad called our ed and chatted w/ her for over an hour about this wal-mart crew. I guess when my ad took a host packet to one of the girls, my Nov host approched her and asked for more info on the biz, because she wants to sign up. Well blah blah, my ad supposedly says that she keeps trying to refer them back to me to be ethically, and she doesn't know what to do. So she calls my ed for advice. Long story short is my exec said you can't turn biz away, & if they don't want amanda then do what they want. My initial reaction is I won't go to meetings.

Well my dir goes into a big long speil (SP) about how I need to be the bigger person & go. Also that if she has to invite them into her home every other month, then I should be there as well. IMO I don't need to be there because she has to invite them into her home.

Then she goes on about how I shouldn't be mad because I did parties & signed one of my ad's old dir's. When this dir quit selling she used to buy from my dir, well then a year ago this lady came up to me to do a cat. show, and ripped on my dir. Well then this year @ the fair she came up and said that she wanted to sign again, but only under me she wanted nothing to do w/ my AD. The way she was talking she was hurt, and I never told her that this cons. came up to me & ripped her to shreads, because I didn't want to hurt her. So then I told her what this person said, and I told her why I didn't tell her, I think she was shocked.

So she goes on more about being the bigger person, and says that they probably are just gonna be kit nappers. Whatever I am over them. By then I was giving her the blah answers & she saw it, and said you aren't even listening, I gotta go.

So the stupid drama continues, & I just want to be rid of this group completely. If they sign I don't want to go to meetings because they are only going to sit there & bash me. These people are complete white trash! I don't want to offer any advice, or to help them.

Then to make matters worse I am roomming w/ my AD & my dir in Dallas, & I can just feel that it's going to be tense the whole time I am there.

This also makes it hard because my biz took a nose dive. I need to get back out there & dive in full force. Sorry this is so long yet again, but I think dh is sick of me talking about it.

Oh wow Amanda - I don't have any advice for ya - just BIG BIG HUGS
(((((((((((((((((((Amanda)))))))))))))))

 

[ChefLisa]

Hi Amanda!

First of all a major HUG for the UGH you are experiencing. I really look forward to how the person who is signing with your AD is going to run her business. Hopefully she will learn something very valuable from it.

This is your chance to totally SHINE! You obviously have a caring heart or this drama would not bother you. You do have a chance to show everyone involved what you are made of.

First of all, how many shows do you want to do a month? Do you have that many scheduled for January and February? Next, host coach like crazy! Have the very best shows you can and get those sales up so when you go to those team meetings, you are the person in the spotlight! Next, offer the opportunity to everyone you meet at these shows! I personally want to see you promote to Director and walk the stage at National Conference! Trashing you at the meetings will be very difficult when you have this much success. Also, as soon as you promote, begin holding your own meetings.

I know very personally how difficult pulling yourself up can be. I walked in July as a new Director and then my business dropped off because I did not do a good job working it. My sales really dropped and I was not recruiting. I had to make the decision to not let my business fail. My sales in October, November and December were much stronger. My December sales are over $4,200, which is my best sales month ever. I also had someone join my team in December.

I know you can do this! My Director is my biggest supporter. If you need someone to talk to, email me and we can chat.

P.S. I will be at Leadership Conference. If you are treated poorly at all, you can call my cell phone and we will figure out something.

Thanks!
Lisa

 

[pamperedalf]

Thanks Caroly & Lisa I need those hugs. Lisa thanks for your support, I appreciate your advice. I don't feel I would be treated poorly at leadership I just feel that it will be tense. Maybe I am reading more into because my emotions are high.

 

[chefann]

Amanda,
I hope everything works out for you. Sometimes the best way to get over a problem person is to do better than they expect you to. so go out there and kick some PC butt!!

 

[Koolotus]

A hug for you amanda
Also, try to remeber that in almost all situations the only thing you can control is your reaction.
That said, it is not EASY to ignore and to not let it affect you, but you must. From what it sounds like your entire business & maybe your sanity is at stake
I think maybe the best thing you can do is give yourself a bit of self-hypnosis...
Remeber back to how you felt when you won the shopping spree at conference and remeber your excitement when you got all your loot.
Now find that excitement and get on the phone!
That thrill and enthusiasm is what is going to get you out of this mess!
get yourself all set up, get your phone numbers out and set a block of time. Close your eyes, put yourself back into that excitement and GO GIRL!
You ARE Better than all this and you kick ASS!
Go Get 'em!

 

[pamperedalf]

Thank you Cheryl! That is exactly what I need to do. I am slowly getting my drive back. I go to a training w/ Belinda Ellsworth this week in Sac, & then leadership, I am hoping that my drive will come back full swing!!Today I went & bought new Stainless Steel appliances for my kitchen & 0% interest for a full year so here is my new stainless steel carrot. It can only get better!

 

[Koolotus]

AWesome!
Keep your virtual cluster posted!

 

[pamperedgirl3]

Thank you Cheryl! That is exactly what I need to do. I am slowly getting my drive back. I go to a training w/ Belinda Ellsworth this week in Sac, & then leadership, I am hoping that my drive will come back full swing!!

Wow! That should really get you going!!!

 

[pamperedalf]

If this doesn't get my drive back I don't know what will?

 

[rennea]

If this doesn't get my drive back I don't know what will?

~~~~~~~~~~~~YOU GO GIRL~~~~~~~~~~~