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Lost in the Midst: Seeking Support & Guidance

In summary, the conversation is about a person's experience with joining a direct selling business under their sister-in-law. They initially loved the business and were excited to join, but as time went on they felt left out and unsupported by their sister-in-law. They are considering quitting and joining under someone else who can provide more help and encouragement. Suggestions are made to talk to their director and find a cluster closer to them for support. The importance of not giving up and finding a solution that works for them is emphasized.
LCOLACHICO
103
:cry: This is long post and I even may sound like I am a cry baby.. I hope I don't sound like this and hopefully someone has been here too, or might know some one that made it through despite the hards times..

Thank you to all who respond, it is appreciated.
I am looking forward to hearing from all comments. Sometimes when you are in the mist of it all you cannot see outside of the box.. Thanks Again for all your help!!

So here I am.. I LOVE my sister in Law. Although I signed up under her for the PC. I now feel that I made a HUGE MISTAKE. With that said we agreed to keep it non personal. So I am here to express my issue as if I did not know her personally.

About 3 yrs ago I signed up under a friend and she decided that she needed to have more time in her FT job. Needless to say I signed up @ a bad time too. My husband was getting ready to deploy, and I was going to care for my kids. the oldest being 9 and the other 2 were 20m and 6mo old.

In the very short time I had with the PC, never did qualify... Just fell in love with it. I wanted to try again at a later time.

I now signed up with my SIL, whom joined under her friend, and asked me to give it another try. I was so excited !!

Going against mixed feelings of being under a family member... We had a long talk and agreed that we would be fine...

Not so much... I heard from her often until I qualified and then it started to tapper very quick. I totally understand that she is super busy being that she works full time, has a family with little ones and it starting her business w/ PC.

I am upset/hurt because I feel that I needed to grow and learn with her. I feel left out and not trying to put it on her...I understand that I need to work for myself.. But She said that I would never be by myself.. We live in different states and so being in her cluster is hard. Even she signed under a friend who lived a few states away also.

Both of their plans are to build their business to earn income to be able to stay home with their little ones..:) I am so happy for them.

I just feel like I was asked to join her so that I would be someone under her.
I never hear from her and if I do it is a mass email sent to everyone. I feel so unconnected.

I emailed her a week ago and explained a little how I felt and that my thought is to stop selling for now. What I did not say is that I am thinking to try and wait out my yr and join again under some one that feels really wants to help, teach, encourage, and help succeed. I feel I have had some really good shows and yet I don't feel like I had any "way to go" spirit.

I have yet to hear from here other than the mass emails, that she sends to everyone.

I am so LOST !! Please can anyone help??
thank you
 
Talk to your director and get set up with hospitality. Is your SIL a director? If not, it is NOT her responsibility to train and coach you--it's HER DIRECTOR'S responsibility.
 
Deb expressed my exact thought.If she is a director, talk to your upline. They're listed on your statements.
 
What about finding a cluster close to you? They will beable to give the support that you need.

My Director lives 4 hours away. At first I didn't here anything from her and relied on Chef Success for support.(Thanks by the way this site is awesome) Then all of the sudden we email, I have attended a couple of trainings, and she has had a couple of meetings for me and my recruit.

So I guess my advice is not to give up but call HO and find a cluster near you!
Hang in there b/c it sounds like you love PC and want to be a consultant. You just need that extra support to make things work!
 
Maybe someone on here lives close to you and you could join their cluster?? Just a thought!
 
I'd hate to see you lose the momentum you've built by sitting out a year. I hope you find a solution that suits your situation perfectly.
 
Don't let this get you down! Some people are not good trainers but want people under neath them. Like mentioned above, go to the director above you. She should help you in ways your SIL cannot.
 
Don't let this stop your business. You can find a hospitality group. And as someone else said if she is not a Director it is not her responsibility.

My Director lives in NC (I am in AL) and my closest Hospitality Group is 90 miles away. I have never been to a meeting and have going strong in PC for almost two years now. I do call in to my Director's meeting if I have time. But other than that we talk with email. But then my personality type is I would rather do it myself in my own way than I would have someone to show me what to do, ha!:D
 
Ditto Deb and Rae - if a recruiter CHOOSE to be a leader/trainer, the director will support that. Mine does! Otherwise, it is the director's responsibility. If your SIL is not a Director, talk to her director, tell her what you need and it is her responsibility to support you.
 
  • #10
Does the director request hospitality or does the consultant request hospitality? My understanding is that the director has to request it, but maybe it doesn't matter who asks HO.
 
  • #11
The Director is supposed to be the one to request it. When I was close to promoting a couple years ago, I just called myself. Depending on who answered at HO, some gave me hospitality director info, but one made me have my director call. Officially it's the director who needs to request one.:)
 
  • #12
I agree that you should find a hospitalitly group near you...what state do you live in. I know that if you were by chance by our group (which what are the chances of that) we would accept you with open arms!!!!
 
  • #13
Unfortunately, we all don't get to sign up with the most awesome recruiter and/or director on earth. But, it's ultimately your business, so you have to decide if you want it and if you do, then you just need to do it yourself. I wish I had the luxury of having a doting director and upper levels who keep in touch with me regularly (My ED just called me on Monday - haven't talked to her in 1.5 years! - I'm assuming she called b/c I recruited someone last month!).Anyway, I figured out long ago that no one was going to make me successful at this business except ME, and I did my best to figure out the best way for me to do it. You can do it - anyone can! PC gives us all the tools we need, just do the research, online training and motivate yourself! Good luck and hang in there!
 
  • #14
I agree if with others if you can get hospitality definitly do it. But I am with Jennifer with not being able to go to cluster meetings I have been to about 4 cluster meetings since starting 3 yrs ago and I have been #1 in sales for the last 3 yrs in my cluster. I dont go to my meetings cause they are 3 1/2 hrs away. And who knows were the closest hospitality director is.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #15
thank you every one for your advice.. My SIL is not my director she is a future director, and her best friend is the director.. But with that being said they are so into getting out of their current job, to work full time as PC that they are super busy. The reality is that really they are trying to may sure they can quite and care for their family.. I have been blessed to stay home with my little one.
I have talked to a wonderful hospitality woman and it was so unfortunate the 1st meeting I was going to have with her group.. I had a fever and was super sick. Because I didnt want to get anyone else sick i didnt go. I did email her and let her know and I am so looking forward to our next time to meet, but that is a mo away..
 
  • Thread starter
  • #16
I totally agree with all of you that I need to want this myself and that no one will do it for me. Personally I joy being with PC because you are your own boss and you don't always have to agree with your "boss" In reality who really gets along with everyone.. What I left out is that my SIL and her Director have quoted scripture to me Phil 4:13. " I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength". I totally believe that God is the one I want to work for. I just find it really hard to see where they are coming from because when they started out they had tins of help. Really they did not start out themselves. I guess I sound butt hurt, and I can make excuses till no end, I feel that it would be nice if they really would try to care a little more. Esp my SIL. after all on the outside of this we would be able to talk to each other, I just not want hard feeling in the fam because we see things differently w/ this PC situation. She and her director are best friends so even though this is her upper line they really have each other as friends that are supportive to one another.

I am very thankful to this site and all the input from everyone. It dose how ever make it a bit easier what a friend who can share and understand where you are at, or coming from.
 
  • #17
I never, and I mean NEVER got anything from my recruiter or director. This board is amazing, and you can learn a lot from everyone here. If you need hospitality, see about getting it, but I have been with the company for 8 years and even did PC for a year while I had cancer (6 months of chemo and 3 radiation, did shows on the off weeks I didn't have treatment), and my recruiter quit about 3 months after I signed and I passed my director years ago--she calls me and asks advice of ME and has for over 5 years now. If you want to make a success of this business, there are a lot of us here to support you! But it's ultimately YOUR responsibility. Keep moving up the "food chain" and don't be shy about asking for help!
 
  • #18
LCOLACHICO said:
But with that being said they are so into getting out of their current job, to work full time as PC that they are super busy.

If they want to do PC full time, they should be doing everything in their power to keep their active people (like YOU) on their team! This makes no sense to me that they would not train and support you.

JMHO.
 
  • #19
DebbieJ said:
If they want to do PC full time, they should be doing everything in their power to keep their active people (like YOU) on their team! This makes no sense to me that they would not train and support you.

Debbie's right. They may come to regret not 'being there' for you.
Besides, directorship is a responsibility, not just a goal (IMHO).
 
  • #20
From reading your posts it sounds like you and you SIL decided to keep this strictly business and you are taking this very personally. So you have changed what you expect of her and maybe she doesn't realize it so she can't step up and be what you need. She sends you the same communications she sends the rest of her team... treating you like them, which was the agreement. Some people sign and go it alone as others have posted here... others need or want more communication and direction from their uplines but until you tell them specifically what it is you need and want... they can't provide it. It sounds like you are more hurt that your SIL has a friend in the business... you assume that they help each other out a lot... maybe they don't, maybe they communicate about PC the same way your SIL is communicating with you. You need to have a candid discussion with your SIL and your director and define what you want or need help with. AND you need to find hospitality closer to you. I have hospitality and it has helped me tremendously to feel more support from PC.

She may be doing what she is because she doesn't want you to feel like she is pressuring you, she has reasons for what she is doing too. Family is hard to work with but you guys need to talk and be honest with each other she may be just as frustrated as you are.

Sorry, that was long. I hope you guys get things worked out and I hope that you continue on with your PC business if that is what you decide to do! Good luck!
 
  • #21
What is it you want or need? Do you want her to call you weekly and check in on how your business is going and give you advice? Does your SIL know what you need? Have you told her? If not, how is she supposed to know? I had a recruit who needed more from me, and I kept in touch with her, leaving messages saying "Call me if you need anything" and then she made things ten times harder on herself trying to do things on her own without ever letting me know the issues she was dealing with. When I found out and questioned her she simply said "I didn't want to bother you" I told her many times she was not bothering me, that that's why I'm here. She still dabbles, but I feel bad because she is a great consultant and I'd love to support her, but I can't give her what she needs if she NEVER TELLS ME what she needs!

The lines of communication work both ways. If you need something, you need to ask....
 

1. What is "Lost in the Midst: Seeking Support & Guidance"?

"Lost in the Midst: Seeking Support & Guidance" is a program designed by Pampered Chef to provide support and guidance to those who are struggling with personal or professional challenges. It offers a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to share their thoughts and concerns and receive advice and support from a trained facilitator.

2. Who can participate in this program?

This program is open to anyone who is seeking support and guidance. It is not limited to Pampered Chef employees and is available to anyone who is in need of support and guidance. We welcome individuals from all backgrounds and walks of life.

3. How long does the program last?

The program consists of six weekly sessions, each lasting about an hour. Participants are encouraged to attend all sessions to get the most out of the program, but it is not mandatory.

4. Is there a cost to participate in this program?

No, there is no cost to participate in this program. It is a free service provided by Pampered Chef as part of our commitment to supporting the well-being of our community.

5. How do I sign up for the program?

You can sign up for the program by contacting your Pampered Chef team leader or HR representative. They will provide you with the necessary information and registration details. You can also reach out to us directly through our website or social media channels.

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