Is My Husband Holding Me Back From Pursuing My Dreams?

[Kinet]

I am so sad right now...I don't know what to do.
I am super excited to start PC, haven't been this excited about something in a while...I'm a SAHM of 2 little girls, and I LOVE it!! It's what I've alway wanted to do...
But lately, DH has been hinting that money is tight and so I've been racking my brain with ideas to help out.
I attended my second PC Show and fell in love with the idea of becoming a consultant myself. I got all the information and got all the answers to what I thought DH would ask.
So, tonight I sit down and talk to him about it..well, I didn't even get to tell him about it because he was against me leaving the house for anything. OK, I'm exagerating, I don't want you to think I have a husband who is stuck back in time...he's great, it's just, he doesn't get excited about stuff I do...
It's like he's phased about it. He gets to play volleyball twice a week but when I mentioned playing hockey, which I love and have played all my life except for the past 3 years because I was pregnant, he freaks out and says I should be at home resting from my long day with the kids.
Anyway, I've whined long enough...thanks for listening...I'm new here and thought I might get some support since you gals seem really great.
Thanks

 

[supergirljennie]

I'm sorry your hubby isn't supportive. My hubby wasn't too excited about it to begin with, but it's grown on him. I think it takes a while, and that a lot of people think it's just a pyramid scheme. Once my DH saw that we get tons of free stuff, plus commission, plus get to write off on taxes so many things - like grocery bills and gas - he's really actually loving it.

Give him some time, and talk to him. I am a SAHM too, and though I've been busy doing PC, it's great to get out of the house and be a grown-up for a while! I think it'll be great for you.

Good luck! I hope things get better.

 

[tlennhoff]

My hubby was a bit of a sceptic when I decided to do this a couple months ago. But then I finished my SS1 pretty much having covered all the expenses I have had and he brought me home a special dessert to celebrate. Of course now he keeps asking "did you make any calls today, get any bookings". But I'm sure he'll get over that soon.

 

[letscook04]

He gets to play volleyball twice a week??? You are out making money!!! TELL HIM that you will try it and once he see's your pay check, then he might change his mine. I am so thankful my hubby was so excited for me and still is after 2 years!!
Good Luck!

 

[lacychef]

My hubby was skeptical in the beginning too; was sure there was some catch that I didn't see. But after seeing me work so hard to earn free products and other awards, he is very proud of me now. Now he sees my tracking chart that I'm keeping, trying to earn us a free trip to SanFransisco, and he realizes that this really is a great company. (only thing is he doesn't want to fly!) Anyway, I think you should just really sit down & talk with him; I'm sure the consultant who did your show would gladly talk with him too. That way he could ask her questions also. Just tell him you'd like to try a few shows..I guarantee you'll make your investment back & then some, then maybe he'll see the advantages! It's a great feeling to get out of the house, go have fun with a bunch of girls (usually all girls) and earn a paycheck for it at the end of the month Hope it works out for you.

 

[nikkijo]

I'm sorry that your hubby is not that supportive. When you are doing shows it would be a great way for him to bond with the children, a little time with daddy and the kids. How about just doing one show a week to start with, this way he's not overwhelmed. Everyone needs to get out of the house once in a while and socialize with adults. I also agree with he will love the checks!

 

[ChefAmber]

my hubby was okay with the idea of me starting PC and then when he would act or say stuff about me doing soo much PC stuff then i told him, well i guess you want be needing any of my pay check then will you. and then he changed after that and now he helps me do my PC stuff every night. so just let him know that this is something that you want to do and that you let him do the things he wants to do so its time for you to do something you want to do. if you need anymore support or need to vent we are all here for you.. and you can even private message me if you want to talk anytime.
your friend, and ear to listen
amber hudgins 495750
papmered chef consultant

 

[quiverfull7]

Your hubby isn't saying his real fears outloud. Ask him what scares him about you doing this OR playing hockey because it isn't really PC that is scaring him. Does he think he'll lose his nights to play Vball if you need to be gone as well? Does he fear having sitters in? There's more here than he's saying... assure him of your love and make sure he knows that you desire to contribute.. .not escape ... be honest and ask for his honest feelings as well. My husband was kinda funny when I told him I was feeling led to do this.. he said.. okay .. fine.. if you can recoup your investment in the first month like they say... then do it and if you hate it.. then you can quit and you have lost nothing and gained your kit... and he's a highly "effeciency
driven" type guy... and not thrilled that I was adding things to my schedule but I am LOVING this business... ask your hubby for a deep heart to heart and see what's really worrying him... I'll be whispering some prayers for you and for his heart to hear yours

 

[ChefBridgetA]

It sounds as though your husband is incredibly thoughtful and wants to take care of his sweet wife and is just clueless as to how to do it, OR he is increcdibly thoughtless and doesn't care that you need to get out and away from the kids too. Either way, my husband isn't very supportive either but in a different way. He just grunted when I told him I'd signed up with PC and when I asked what was the problem he said "Well, you never make any money" He will see just how wrong he is when he sees my commission checks. I really hope your husband gets a clue because being a SAHM is awesome but you need those breaks and I hope that you have a ton of fun with PC!

 

[pchefsharron]

Hi, Believe me you are not alone. My Dh also reluctantly went along with my PC business. (third time around) Often they (dh) are overwhelmed with what they have going on and are afraid your new venture will interfere or cause more work for them. I have been very careful (too independant) to not allow my business to interfere... to not cause waves. My prayer is that someday he will become more supportive. Hopefully this time around I will succeed and make this bisiness grow. Maybe even above and beyond my wildest dreams. Aiming high!!!!

 

[DebbieSAChef]

My hubby is very supportive!!I think men like to see numbers and actual information laid out for them.

When I joined I laid it all out for my hubby.

When I also told him I would be saving him big bucks by not buying the products myself but earning them for FREE or at a discount, he liked that.

I also mentioned I would be making commission of 20%. So for hanging out with women at a show where I cooked (which is one of my passions) and showed off PC tools I could easily bring home $100 for one show. 3 hours max time away is about $33 an hour.

I also explained my need to get away from the kids and the house and even him for a few days out of the month. And since I homeschool our two oldest, entertain our two year old and care for my eleven month old at home, this is a way for me not to be sent away to the LOONEY FARM!!!

Mind you at the time I only had the two oldest and my two year old was only 6 months. He listened and since I printed out the sheets to show him my contribution to the family and my need to have my own thing. He agreed!

He's a business minded man. He loved it and told me to sign up!! I will be in the PC business two years next month!! He's even more supportive now. It defintely grew on him!! And he loves for me to cook for him. Whatever makes it easier for me in the kitchen, is great for him.
He understands that you get what you pay for. With his tools he doesn't buy the cheap stuff, so he understands my need for higher priced kitchen items that will last, the warranties are great!!!

Debbie

 

[Paige Dixon]

Hmmm, my X always said that my PC biz was costing him money. Funny how I"m able to support the household and three kids on it without any child support or spousal support from him when it is so "costly" to be in business. I think they like having us around at thier beck and call. When they want to relax, they have us there waiting on them.

What if you did Sat/Sun brunch shows and were able to be home every night? Would it be easier for him to take the kids to the park rather than have to get them in bed?

Earning a trip wins them over every time. Especially if you threaten to take your sister since he's not supportive.

 

[tiffanypatton79]

If he's like my hubby he'll turn around, when I first approtched him after going to my first show about being a consultant.. he kept refering it to a mlm! and wanted me to get a real job.. blah...not what I was going for but being a newlywed we were lacking in kitchen tools so...after my kit came, he was impressed with the quality of the stuff I was selling and loves the stoneware Then when i earned ss1 he was real proud of me (he even hung my ribbons on the fridge lol) And was amazed all that I got for free..while earning an income.He's in the past months been braging to the ladies at work about what I cook now, showing off his lunch (leftovers) to them.. i even booked a show that way ! so once you have the products I think he'll change his mind hopefully like mine did....good luck and remember if it's something you want to do .. DO IT you will probally have resentment towards you're hubby if you don't .. that's what i went ahead and did it and am happy

 

[BethCooks4U]

If you get an oportunity to attend a PC event that spouses are invited to GO and take him with you! A year or so into my business we went to a regional event ("Family.... " (something - I can't remember right now) that Doris, Jay and the VIPS from PC came to. It was $25 each and included dinner. My dh was somewhat supportive but since that he understands the business model and thinks PC is an awesome opportunity.

Or have him go to ANY regional event or to a team meeting. If he sees what it's about he may change his tune.

 

[Kinet]

OMG you gals are so supportive and helpful!! You are all awesome!

I think what some of you said about him not knowing what to expect and that things will change a little bit is what scares him the most.
Otherwise, he is the most supportive, loving husband ever. But, this is new territory for him...
I've always wanted to be a SAHM and I do love, and I love being a housewife and having great meals on the table when he gets home. I think part of the problem is that I keep telling him how much I love doing those things, so he thinks that's ALL I want to do.
I do need time off and out of the house, I know all mother's understand this, so I won't try to explain it to you guys.
But I've been having these thoughts of taking a class or doing something, anything else to keep me moving forward. I feel like I'm stuck at the same level I was when I started being a SAHM...I need to move forward. And I think that PC is the solution.
I will try to talk to him again tonight and show him the numbers and tell him I have nothing to lose, if it's not working after a month, that's it!

Again, thanks to all you ladies...YOU ROCK!!!!!

 

[pamperedgirl3]

I needed PC for the same reason! I think maybe you should let him know that it's something that you can just try out, so if it ends up not working out for your family, you aren't stuck or have a bunch of inventory to get rid of. Maybe that will make him feel better.