How Not to Be Pushy but Get Your Point Across

[cmdtrgd]

I am really scared of being "that pushy salesperson", so I sometimes go too much on the other side. I have been working on trying to pin down people on what they DO want from me. Here is a recent email conversation about recruiting. I had spoken to her last year around this time and she wanted to sign, but life got in the way:

Me - "We have an amazing New Consultant Promotion going on - I have attached the flyer in case you or someone you know would like some cash before the holidays!" (NOTE - I did send this to her work address as a response to something else. This did make her uneasy...make sure you know where you CAN contact someone!)

Possible Recruit - "Kate, I am going to have to pass on the pampered chef ideas. Between, Kids, work, football and church I am just too busy. If you would please take me off the email list at this time that would be great. I also asked around and none of my friends were interested at this time."

This is where I normally would have taken her off the list and said nothing else. Now, she is also a work friend, so I wanted to make sure we were still okay.

M - "That's fine. I know you have a busy schedule - especially with two growing boys and opposite work shifts with your husband. I hope I didn't offend you with giving you information. I try very hard to not be pushy, but to give information freely, answer questions freely and let people make their own decisions. As for the email list, did you want off the customer newsletter or just not have me mention Pampered Chef anymore or both? I don't want you to feel uncomfortable - I would hate to ruin our friendship!"

PR - "No, I'm not offended. I just didn't want to lead you on to think I was going to sign up. It's just not in the budget at this time. If you want to still email me stuff at home [email protected] that is okay. Friendship is a-okay. I wish you all the best."

Again, this would be a great time for me to say thanks and go on with never giving her recruiting info again. I pushed myself to get more specific on what she wanted.

M - "Whew...glad we're okay! I have your home email on my newsletter list.
Now, can I ask if it is okay to keep sending you stuff on becoming a consultant so you can see what is going on. Maybe it will be a good time later? It took me 6 years to finally do this, and I would be so sad if I weren't there for you if/when the time is right. I don't feel led on at all! If you don't want to become a consultant ever - that's fine, too!"

PR - "Okay, but please send them to my home email address."

Now, did I seem pushy at all? I don't feel so. If you feel that I did, please post it and what I could have done better/changed/not said/said, etc. I'm here to learn and to help encourage others to push themselves outside of their comfort zone.

 

[chefann]

Way to go, Kate! I think you did well. You addressed her concerns, and got permission to keep her on your list. That's the big difference between being pushy and not.

 

[chefheidi2003]

No actually I think that everything went great...I wish I could be more like that...I am also in the same boat as you I am so afraid of being too pushy.

 

[cmdtrgd]

I have learned that the phrase "That's okay" or "That's fine" when they say no is very powerful! They appreciate that you won't bug them about something when they say no. I have also learned that people are very wary about saying maybe because of past pushy people. That's why I want to get specific on what they do want from me. That is also why I tell them it took me 6 years to sign, so that lets them know I'm willing to work with them for a while.

 

[cmdtrgd]

No actually I think that everything went great...I wish I could be more like that...I am also in the same boat as you I am so afraid of being too pushy.

This was via email, so it was easier for me because I was able to choose my words and read them before I pushed send. Having the words to say makes it so much easier!

 

[friday]

I don't think you were pushy. Not at all. I think you did well.

 

[BethCooks4U]

I think your responses were perfect!! :thumbup: WOO HOO for you! - keeping that door open! :balloon:

 

[KellyTheChef]

You did great! Being pushy is when we keep pushing after being told NO. You didn't keep pushing, you asked open ended questions so that you understood EXACTLY what she meant! That's what we are all striving to be good at!

 

[raebates]

Sounds like you did a good job. Persistent is not pushy, especially when you make it clear (as you did) that you just want to make sure you understand what she wanted. On the other hand, people can misread anything. My director tells the story of the host who she was pushy because she offered to watch the host's kids while she shopped. (They were already acquainted, though not really friends.)

 

[quiverfull7]

This is SUPER! Thanks for sharing.. it shows all of us how to do it right! I was listening to Lyn Conway last night and she instructs us to read the definition of pushy in the dictionary so here it is:
Dictionary.com –adjective, push·i·er, push·i·est. Informal. obnoxiously forward or self-assertive.



—Synonyms brazen, brash, cheeky.
adj. push·i·er, push·i·est
Disagreeably aggressive or forward.

I don't see any of these definitions in your dialog! I was struck with her simple instruction to read this definition... it makes me totally realize that offering the opportunity in the way you did it... and the way we are all trained to do it isn't pushy at all.
WAY TO GO!