My Dad's Fight for Recovery: A Daughter's Sad Update

[pamperedlinda]

I am so sad tonight I can hardly stand it. Some of you already know my situation since I've been posting some updates on fb, but for those of you who don't here's the Reader's Digest version:


August 27th my dad was found unconscious in his home, he had fallen and hit his head pretty badly and had aparently been down for more than a day (I think it was 2-3 days). He has very week legs and I'm sure that he was unable to pick himself back up, he is also a diabetic and had not eaten in several days - he was delirious and on the verge of diabetic shock. He has some brain trauma from hitting his head and had 3 seperate brain bleeds. My father is in FL and my brother and I live 9 hours away in GA...we made the trip down here in just under 7 hours! My dad is still in the hospital and has not improved much, most of the time he does not know where he is, who he is or who I am - his speach has been affected as well and he talks mostly 'jibberish'. The doctors assure me that this is b/c of the pressure on his brain from the bleeds - and will improve as the fluid is absorbed back into his body. My visit with him tonight was really painful for me. I have been here for 16 days, I go to the hospital every day for several hours, I miss my family and I miss my life :cry: My husband and son are coming down for a few days next week, so I am excited about that. It just breaks my heart to see my dad like this.

Thanks for letting me share this with you. Any prayers or good thoughts you can spare would be greatly appreciated.

 

[janezapchef]

I am so sorry, Linda! Prayers for you, your dad and your family! {{{{hugs}}}}

 

[Judybabe]

I believe in the power of prayer. I will add you to my prayers today.Blessings from Nebraska

 

[PamperedDor]

AWWW Linda!! On FB and Here - you are sooo loved!! Hon, please take some time and try to "cherish" this time with your dad!! We are all here praying and cyber hugging you!!!! (if I could sent you some coffee I would!) Prayers everyday are being said for your wonderful dad and you - NOW please get some rest!!!!

 

[nikked]

Linda, my family is praying for yours (in NM)...

 

[Sheila]

Awe, big (((hugs))) I hope that he starts doing better soon.

 

[lauriedip]

praying for you. May God give you peace right now as you try to do what is best. sounds like you have a very supportive husband.

 

[chefann]

Linda, it's hard when someone we know and love is suffering. And you fall into that category. You're such a caring, giving person, that it hurts me to see you in such pain. If you need to talk again, you have my number.

 

[PCMomto4]

I am so sorry, where in Fl is your dad located?

 

[twinchefs]

So sorry, sending hugs and prayers to you and your family.

 

[Nanisu]

Linda: Just finished going there this year with my mom--my prayers are with you

 

[Grandmarita]

You are definitely in my prayers. As I read your post, it reminded me of my dear friend who had a similar fall, while alone in her home, and was not discovered til the next day.
We went through the vigil and signed papers, just in case. Her daughter kept saying "but what if she keeps breathing". Well, the good news is that she recovered and regained her ability to speak normally, and was able to accept her life as it was
changed by the fall. She gave it her all, and lived an additional five years. The patient's attitude and faith can make such a difference in their recovery.

 

[chefsteph07]

I"ve been keeping up w/ you on FB and I am so sorry to hear that there isn't much improvement!
Do they know what caused him to collapse in the first place?
You are in my thoughts and prayers!

 

[susanr613]

my heart goes out to you and your family. my prayers are with you all as well.

 

[pamperedlinda]

Thanks every one. I was on my pitty-pot earlier, I am feeling much better now and you helped get me there.

To answer some of your questions:
Dor - thansk, but I couldn't take it anymore and I broke down and bought a coffee pot and some Starbucks French Roast - helps my day start out much better!
Ann - I'll call soon
PCMom to 4 - I'm in West Palm Beach right now
Steph - he has had week legs for a while, he doesn't eat/drink correctly or take his diabetic meds like she should, I believe that he lost his balance and fell a couple of times over a 4 day period

One thing that does kinda brighten this sad situation is all the funny things he says right now - he is in lala land and also is halucinating at times. Here's a funny one that happened yesterday morning. I stopped by the hospital in the morning for a quick visit and I was holding his hand while alking to him. Well, I released his hand and about 5 mins later he looked at my kinda funny and said let me see your hands, so I held them up. He said are both of those YOUR hands? I said yes and he said, well then who's hand amd I holding! I said your not holding anyone's hand daddy, so he looked at his hand and said okay. LOL, the look on his face during this was priceless!

I told the ICU nurses that they really should have cameras mounted in the rooms and give each patient a DVD of their stay when they are discharged. I should keep a diary of all of our 'conversations' so when he gets in his right head I can tell him all about it.

 

[rennea]

Sending good thoughts and ooodles of {{{hugs}}} your way Linda.

 

[Geekgirl69]

Sending prayers and hugs to you as well.

 

[Shawnna]

Linda, you and your dad are in my prayers. When we are on meds we tend to say a lot of things that are funny. However, just a thought, perhaps someone was holding your dad's hand...we never know when God sends us a little help. I will continue to lift you up in prayer. I know extended stays in the hospital are tiring on the family. You be sure and take care of yourself. You can't help your dad if you don't take care of yourself. Make sure you eat and if you need to, talk to a chaplain at the hospital...or a preacher in the area...or a close friend. Talking helps a lot.

 

[scottcooks]

Praying for you and your family. Glad you have found humor - definitely write a log of the conversations! Look around for support close to you, too - when God closes a door, he opens a window!

 

[Chef Endora]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. My prayers for you both. Take care of yourself.

 

[raebates]

You know I'm praying.

 

[pamperedlinda]

You know I'm praying.

Yes, I do - thanks Rae!

 

[pamperedlinda]

Linda, you and your dad are in my prayers. When we are on meds we tend to say a lot of things that are funny. However, just a thought, perhaps someone was holding your dad's hand...we never know when God sends us a little help. I will continue to lift you up in prayer. I know extended stays in the hospital are tiring on the family. You be sure and take care of yourself. You can't help your dad if you don't take care of yourself. Make sure you eat and if you need to, talk to a chaplain at the hospital...or a preacher in the area...or a close friend. Talking helps a lot.

Yes Shawnna, I do believe that he has had angels watching over him, even though he is an agnostic. He and I had a conversation about angels the other night too. I keep talking to him about him being in the hospital and how he got there. I was telling him that he fell and hit his head and that the ambulance came and they broke his window so that they could get to him. He said, why did they do that - angels don't need have to break windows, they could have gone right through them and then opened the door to let the others in. I said daddy, did you see an angel? He said, I saw somebody!

 

[pampchefsarah]

Prayers from VA for your Dad, you, and all your family? I'm curious - how was he discovered? I mean, did someone happen to come over that day, or was he supposed to meet someone and didn't show up?

I love the story of "I saw someone," and "whose hand am I holding?" There are definitely angels around your dad, and I pray this experience leads him to Jesus.

 

[Teresa Lynn]

Sending you prayers and hugs

 

[pamperedcindy]

You and your family are in my prayers.

 

[heat123]

Oh Sweetie, I am soo sorry to hear this! Take care of you, hugs and prayers!

 

[chefcharity]

Yes Shawnna, I do believe that he has had angels watching over him, even though he is an agnostic. He and I had a conversation about angels the other night too. I keep talking to him about him being in the hospital and how he got there. I was telling him that he fell and hit his head and that the ambulance came and they broke his window so that they could get to him. He said, why did they do that - angels don't need have to break windows, they could have gone right through them and then opened the door to let the others in. I said daddy, did you see an angel? He said, I saw somebody!

Goosebumbs!

You are both in my prayers!

 

[StacieB]

Thoughts and prayers coming your way!

 

[cathyskitchen]

Oh, Linda, I'm so sorry to hear about this! You and your father are in my thoughts and prayers. ((HUGS))!

 

[dannyzmom]

Lin -
I am sorry I am late in replying. Do you want me to come up this week before your family gets there? Or if you'd like a major distraction, I have a cluster meeting tomorrow night & you are more than welcome to come for a little friendship & fellowship!
<3
Love you...
xoxo

 

[pamperedlinda]

Lin -
I am sorry I am late in replying. Do you want me to come up this week before your family gets there? Or if you'd like a major distraction, I have a cluster meeting tomorrow night & you are more than welcome to come for a little friendship & fellowship!
<3
Love you...
xoxo

hmmmm....are you serving pastelitos? lol

Maybe - let's touch base tomorrow. I've got a security company coming to reactivate my dad's alarm system in the morning and I need to get in touch with the pool guy to take care of my dad's pool for me. My son and husband are coming on Tues for a few days too. Depending on how my dad is tomorrow I just might come down. email me some directions. Love you too!

 

[Jennie4PC]

Linda, Sorry to hear about what is going on ith your dad. I have heard so many stories about people in the house, he as definitly being watched over. You family will be in my prayers

 

[Chefgirl2]

Linda, You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

 

[pampchefrhondab]

I'm praying for you and your Dad Linda. I'm sorry you are going through this.

It is terrible to see your parents go through things like this. My own Mother has Parkinson's and is really starting to lose her memory and has halucinations.

Keep us posted on his progress.

 

[Grandmarita]

I'm so glad you have a sense of God with You, and your Dad. That somehow gets us through some pretty tough times. Keep a journal for your own sake. I still have the one from my Mom's various hospital stays (13 in 3 yrs). Also can remember, like yesterday, my dear friend's ramblings after her fall. The times when she was coherent were when she talked about recipes she loved to make. "Blueberry muffins - yum yum!" It made me want to go right home and make some for her.

I love the image of you holding his hand, and him later thinking you were still holding it. I immediately thought of Jesus being the one to hold his hand. You are in my prayers.

 

[pcchefjane]

Praying for you and your dad, Linda! Sounds a lot like the fall my cousin took several months ago. She did go home so you never know what miracles God will perform in your dad's case! Maybe he just wanted to get his attention!

 

[AJPratt]

Linda... I don't know where to begin. It is so hard for you to be bearing this burden by yourself. My heart aches for you and I wish I was closer so I could be there. Continue to stay strong for just a little bit longer. Things will work out. The good news is that the docs see room for improvement! See you on FB!

 

[jwpamp]

Prayers and thoughts are with you and your family.

 

[Shawnna]

Linda...my entire church is praying for you and your dad.

 

[pamperedlinda]

Linda...my entire church is praying for you and your dad.

That is so sweet, thanks!

 

[pamperedlinda]

Thanks everyone. I am starting to get frustrated. He has been in the hospital for 18 days now and I honestly haven't seen much improvement at all. Everyone tells me that the brain injury will take a long time to heal, but I thought that I'd see more improvement than this by now. He seems to have a pattern that I've noticed for the past 2 weeks. He'll have a really great day-day and half which is uplifting, then for the next 2 days he does nothing but sleep and talks jibberish. I'm expecting to talk to the doctor today for more info. I can't stay here forever and I refuse to leave him too. I was hoping that I would be able to take him home with me soon. He is unable to travel by anything but medical transport at this time and that is expensive...however, if this path continues I will have no choice. I really need and want to go home to my own family.

I guess what's also got me down a bit is the unknown. My father should not have been living alone and I knew it, but could do nothing about it. Now I can. He is going home with me. I don't know if it will be temporary or permanent. I don't know what kind of care he will need. If he doesn't get any better than this I will not be able to care for him myself in my home, he will have to go to a facility. My hope is that he will improve, that I can have him in my home while he gets strong and healthy again, and that he will move closer to me and my brother. I just wish I knew what was in our future.

I know that my life (and his) are about to change big-time. I wish I knew to what degree. My PC biz will have to take a back seat to all of this and I am sad about that as well. I had a beautiful Sept lined up - 6 shows scheduled and I was working on confirming a total of 10 or more. I've had to rescheule all of them. Only one of my hosts wanted to go ahead and do a catalog show, the others want to wait for me. I was on-track for earning Disney and now I have a feeling that is not going to happen. I am extremely grateful that I am in a position to drop everything and be here, but it's still a bummer.

 

[AJPratt]

Linda, things will work out. Talk to the doc and contact HO about staying active. It is good that you are able to do this. If you had a 9-5, it would have been almost impossible. Whn I am in a togh situation (last 2years) I have gotten by, by celebrating the little things and knowing it could always be worse.

 

[Shawnna]

Linda...we will keep praying. Ask God to show you what to do...to give you a sign. He is always there to give us guidance. It will be great...and hard...if you can take your dad home with you. I know there will be many rough days and many wonderful days. Don't give up hope. If you need to put him in a facility check them all out/research. Maybe their is a Faith Based facility near you. The biggest things with facilities is that someone visits every day...at different times during the day. Facilities are usually understaffed and the staff is underpaid but if they know you will be checking they will not forget to take care of your dad. I don't mean that to be negative toward facilites...just that there is only so much a person can do and with all the budget cuts we have to stay on top of things when it comes to our loved ones. But, we are going to keep praying and believing God is going to intervene for you.

As far as your business goes...call your best hosts/customers and tell them your situation. Tell them you need their help and what your goals are. You will be surprised at the help you will get. My hospitality director was down after a fall/surgery and she survived on catalog shows because she did this. I'm not sure about the policy at HO for this type of situation.

 

[Shawnna]

bumping to keep this in view. Keep us updated as you can Linda.

 

[pampered1224]

Me to LInda - I am sorry. I have not been out in a few days and just noticed all of this. Pat and I are saying many, many, many prayers for you as well. And you know my number too! You helped me through some very tough times and I would be more than honored to return the favor! And you would have an ear and my full heart for you any time! After 7 CDT that is! Luv you and I am hoping, and wishing and praying BIG TIME for you all.
BIG HUGS!

 

[babywings76]

Oh Linda, my heart is just breaking for you! I'm so sorry you are having to go through all this. I'm sorry it's been such a tough road for you and your family. I hope that the right path to take will become clear for you, so you don't have to be tormented on what to do and which way to go. I know that our Heavenly Father loves you and your loved ones and cares about what you are all going through. Hang in there! You're in my prayers.

 

[Shawnna]

moving to the top. Linda you are continually in my prayers. I am praying for God to give you strength and to help you know when the right time is to move your dad and where to move him to. I am believing in a miraculous healing for your dad. May God bless you today and send you some helpers.

 

[pamperedlinda]

update:

He had a much better day yesterday. When I arrived at the hospital he was in physical therapy and actually doing okay - he was very wobbly on his feet though. He didn't know who I was the entire time, but at times he knew me. they said he will most likely be there for 2 or more weeks.

Thanks for the good thoughts.

 

[quiverfull7]

Linda, I am sorry and will be praying for all of you. I had to pay my sub here so I've been locked out for a while!