Need Advice – in a Quandary (Long)

[Kitchen Diva]

If any of these things don't work, try gin & tonics.

That's what I do.

In fact, lately it seems as thought I can't handle it, and I don't even have that much "it" to handle. So tonight, I treated myself and my former future husband to drinks. Worked like a charm.

Of course, if you're not a drinker, chocolate does the same thing.....

(ok, and before I get bugged by Janet & Kitchen Diva...no, I didn't have a man. He didn't know he was my future husband. He broke my heart. Now he's my former future husband. He doesn't know that either. I just call him Paul. It's shorter to say....)

And I was already jumping up and down for you! I'm sorry for the uber fast relationship with Paul! Want me to take him out (and I mean that in the mafia sense of the word, not the backstabbing best friend sense of the word...) and I don't bug you, I love you.

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Laurie, I'm so happy about your news and that things are looking up, and you were able to make dinner, have two shows for June and that you will be calling and asking for a different counselor. One that takes 2 months to return messages is a little too unorganized or busy for me! Hugs and continued prayers!

 

[Jean DeVries]

And I was already jumping up and down for you! I'm sorry for the uber fast relationship with Paul! Want me to take him out (and I mean that in the mafia sense of the word, not the backstabbing best friend sense of the word...) and I don't bug you, I love you.

Nah.

We hung out a lot last year and were really good friends. I sent him an email telling him I was interested in more, and he completely ignored it. Never mentioned it. Two months later he was dating someone and never told me. I don't really care that he was/is dating someone else, I was more hurt that I completely poured my heart out in an email and he didn't even acknowledge it. It wasn't because he didn't care, or is some great a$$, he was probably just too nice to tell me no, and didn't have the communication skills necessary to let me down easy.

I've only recently started talking to him for other than work things. I can be friends with him, but I don't have to trust him. He got kicked out of my sandbox.

Sorry to hijack the thread

 

[pamperedpals]

Yesterday, I was just about to start making calls and trying to get my business back on track and get some show's on the books and my DH calls me from work and tells me his schedule is going to change July 1st.

He will be working T & W (10a-8p), Th (8a-6p) and F (12p-10p). I told him I might as well just quit PC now, because there is no time for me to do anything. Okay, can we say major meltdown! :cry:

I have been thinking more and more about my business and have decided to take a leave effective July 1st and see what happens during that time. I even spoke with my director last night and she is at the point, she doesn't even care if she looses her directorship, because she can only do 1 show a week now that she is working pt.

It just seems that all of the "signs" I am getting are telling to quit. However, I don't want to make any rash decisions, so I thought I could reflect on why I started my business again and if I am getting what I want out of it during my leave.

Thank you all for you wonderful advice. It keeps me going.

 

[janetupnorth]

Look at it this way Laurie - you still have Mondays and Saturdays!...and if it is a good show, it may be worth a sitter. Don't neglect giving yourself time outside of the house. A PC show may give you a needed break from the housework once in awhile. Keep an open mind and see how things go.

 

[chefmeg]

Look at it this way Laurie - you still have Mondays and Saturdays!

...and if it is a good show, it may be worth a sitter.

Don't neglect giving yourself time outside of the house. A PC show may give you a needed break from the housework once in awhile. Keep an open mind and see how things go.

this is the bottom line Laurie....take the leave if you must and just try to get a few ducks in a row, not all of them. As women, we tend to want all aspects of our lives running on all cylinders, and that is just not how life works. We take it personally if we can't juggle everything, and nothing could be further from the truth. I don't know how old you are, but I feel a generation of us was lied to in the 70's and early 80's...you cannot have it all....at least without MAJOR sacrifice in some areas. Write down the things that are most important to you...and work toward improving those and only those areas. This is a process and will take time. Enlisting the family in housework is a beautiful thing! Good start! Next, do you need more "me" time? Schedule it...seriously...I get my nails done every other week and a pedi once a month. Doesn't sounf like much, but it is time I spend on me and me alone! Trying to cook meals every night is hard when your the Mommy taxi! POWER COOKING!!!

Give yourself a break~no one told us this was going to be easy, and they also didn't tell us there would be times we would need to shoot something! Find your in-between and be happy for yourself that you did!

BIG HUGS!!!

 

[merego]

I pretty much agree with what everyone else has said.
You have alot on your plate and you need to prioritize what is best for you.
I wouldn't make any qucik decisions about quitting since you do love it so much. I agree with the advice to just do enough to stay active and get through all your other stuff right now.
Hang in there, it will get better
HUGS

 

[chefsteph07]

In my opinion, it sounds like you are making MORE justifications for sticking WITH PC than not...if that is the case, then take your leave.

That's the flexibility of the job, you can do what you want, and if you have to really find reasons why to stick with it then maybe your heart really isn't in it. My dh goes to school Mon-Thurs till 9pm and I have 2 kids who are in various activities and I still find time for the biz w/o making justifications. Yeah, it gets on my nerves sometimes that I can't do shows when "I" want to, but I work around it and do what I can.

So, if you are really struggling w/ getting your mojo up for doing shows, take the leave and see if things change for you at the end of the summer...good luck!

 

[pamperedpals]

UpdateHello everyone! I have sure missed being on here the last couple of weeks. I was on medical leave from work for a week and a half, because of my left shoulder/collar bone. Still don’t know what is going on there, but, I think I will have had every test possible here soon. I do go see a bone specialist (he is suppose to be THE bone specialist) August 11th.

I am so psyched and excited, I can hardly stand it! DH finally got his new schedule this past Sunday. I am going to start making phone calls tonight and get shows booked for July. Yes, you read that correctly July!

I decided that I don't need a leave of absence; I need a major kick in the butt! DH has been totally supportive of whatever I want to do and I told him I want to keep my PC business. I have also had more people stop me in the last three weeks (thanks to the decals on my car) and ask for a catalog. I actually got a little smarter the last week or so, because I started asking them for their name and phone number, so I could follow up with them. (Yes, I’m a slow learner, but I am a learner!)

I am keeping my goals attainable for myself, so I don’t get disappointed and overwhelmed, like I did earlier. One show a week on Monday’s with an occasional Saturday. I will be able to do my host coaching on Sunday and Thursday evenings, when DH will be home to help with the kids. I love host coaching on Sunday evening's, because you find most people home at that time. :love:

Thanks for all of your advice and giving it to me straight! Well, I best get back to work, before, I get really behind.

 

[IAmChefJ]

Awesome Awesome that things are looking up, and awesome that you've found this awesome support group.

I just wanted to throw in there that the best money I spend each week is on a cleaning lady. It's a good friend who's a stay at home mom who's kids are in school, she comes on Fridays and spends 2 hours tidying up and it is a HUGE relief to my stress level. She does it for a little extra spending money, and I trust her with a key to my house.

Hang in there!

 

[Kitchen Diva]

Re: Update

Hello everyone! I have sure missed being on here the last couple of weeks. I was on medical leave from work for a week and a half, because of my left shoulder/collar bone. Still don’t know what is going on there, but, I think I will have had every test possible here soon. I do go see a bone specialist (he is suppose to be THE bone specialist) August 11th.

I am so psyched and excited, I can hardly stand it! DH finally got his new schedule this past Sunday. I am going to start making phone calls tonight and get shows booked for July. Yes, you read that correctly July!

I decided that I don't need a leave of absence; I need a major kick in the butt! DH has been totally supportive of whatever I want to do and I told him I want to keep my PC business. I have also had more people stop me in the last three weeks (thanks to the decals on my car) and ask for a catalog. I actually got a little smarter the last week or so, because I started asking them for their name and phone number, so I could follow up with them. (Yes, I’m a slow learner, but I am a learner!)

I am keeping my goals attainable for myself, so I don’t get disappointed and overwhelmed, like I did earlier. One show a week on Monday’s with an occasional Saturday. I will be able to do my host coaching on Sunday and Thursday evenings, when DH will be home to help with the kids. I love host coaching on Sunday evening's, because you find most people home at that time. :love:

Thanks for all of your advice and giving it to me straight! Well, I best get back to work, before, I get really behind.

Sweet!~ Glad you decided to stay! Prayers for the shoulder, and keep us up to date, and I think those people seeing yoru decals and asking for catalogs is your sign!!!! Keep it up!

 

[chefmeg]

I am really proud of you! Glad to hear that you are feeling better about your decisions and I hope your shoulder gets figured out soon!