Basement Leak Causes Kitchen Remodel Delay - Why I Hope My Cabinets Are Ruined

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Discussion Overview

This thread centers around a participant's frustration regarding a delayed kitchen remodel due to a basement leak and their partner's decision to postpone the project until they find a job. Participants share their personal experiences and frustrations related to home improvement projects and communication with their partners.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based
  • Exploratory

Main Points Raised

  • One participant expresses frustration about a basement leak affecting kitchen cabinets intended for a remodel, highlighting the delay caused by their partner's decision to wait for them to find a job.
  • Another participant shares their experience of feeling similarly frustrated with their partner's procrastination on home repairs.
  • Several users mention the emotional toll of waiting for home projects to be completed and the impact of financial decisions on these delays.
  • One participant discusses the challenges of moving the cabinets and the uncertainty about insurance coverage for potential damage.
  • Another participant reflects on their own relationship dynamics, noting how their partner's busy schedule affects home maintenance responsibilities.
  • One participant shares a humorous anecdote about a childhood photo of their partner, aiming to lighten the mood amidst the frustrations expressed.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ among participants regarding the reasons for delays in home projects and the communication styles with their partners. No clear consensus emerges on how to handle these situations.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects personal experiences related to home improvement delays, partner dynamics, and the emotional aspects of managing home projects. Participants share insights based on their unique situations without implying universal solutions.

Who May Find This Useful

Consultants experiencing similar frustrations with home improvement projects or partner communication may find relatable experiences and perspectives in this discussion.

chefann
Gold Member
Messages
22,050
Ugh.

We had a lot of rain yesterday (remnants of Ike), and our basement, which doesn't usually leak, did. In the area where we've got our kitchen cabinets stored for the kitchen remodel. The remodel was supposed to be this year, but DH told me (in an email, mind you) that he wasn't going to start it until I found a job. This is despite the fact that we're making payments on the cabinets and appliances already. And, in fact, have them all in the basement and garage. (So it's not like we're saving any significant money by holding off on the project.)

Because I have money already set aside for the remodel, although it's in stock form that we'd have to sell, I just don't see why we couldn't have gone ahead with the kitchen. DH got his garage 4 years ago and I've been waiting for a new kitchen since we moved in 6 years ago.

Not all of the boxes are wet, but several are. I hope they're ruined. Then maybe DH will see how silly it was to wait.
 
Will your house insurance cover it? Maybe you'll get a check for replacement.
 
:(:( Sorry Ann!
 
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janetupnorth said:
Will your house insurance cover it? Maybe you'll get a check for replacement.

I don't know, since they're not installed. And DH hates filing claims since it makes the rates go up, and we just switched companies (if we were going to switch in a couple months, we'd go ahead and file).

I moved a couple and they don't appear to be damaged, other than the boxes. The problem is that there's no good place to move them to and I don't know which wood I'm allowed to use to create "skids" to put them on.
 
i can hear the frustration in your post, and I don't blame you. What a twiddle-headed move.
 
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Thanks. I just needed to vent. I know that somehow it's going to be my fault if they need to be replaced. (As if I could have stopped the rain.)
 
chefann said:
I hope they're ruined
I thought you meant Merrill Lynch and Lehmann Brothers.Don't worry about them. They're ruined.
 
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Yeah - that I knew. :rolleyes:Maybe I can convince DH that I need to assemble one or two to use as supplemental storage in the basement, since there's not enough room in the kitchen for all my PC stuff.
 
Good luck with that one. Did you know I found a picture of him from when he was a little kid?
becomingaelectrician.jpg
 
KG, hmmm....that was mean! LOL!
 
KG, I hope that picture made Ann smile like it did me.

I'm sad for you, Ann. I can tell you're quite frustrated. I won't vent about my dh, but I know what it's like to feel the way you feel. I hope you find a great job, soon. You are so smart and talented, and any company would be lucky to get you. I need a picture of a face with a tongue sticking out and spitting to go right here for your dh. I'm sure he isn't a bad guy, but in this case I stick my tongue out at him because I like you!
 
I don't understand why he's waiting till you find a job if you are already making payments on it?

That is a move my dh would make if he just didn't feel like doing it..wait for this, wait for that, etc.

What good are the payments you are making when they are sitting in a box?
I am having similar problems w/ my dh and a window that I broke a month ago, I have been almost begging him to fix it and install it again but he won't do it. My mother told me to threaten to hire someone to do it and if that didnt' work to actually DO IT. I just might. Maybe you should tell DH that if he cant get working on it you will hire someone to install the cabinets for you.
 
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JAE said:
KG, I hope that picture made Ann smile like it did me.
That did make me smile. It could also pass as a photo of my dad. ;)
chefsteph07 said:
I don't understand why he's waiting till you find a job if you are already making payments on it?

That is a move my dh would make if he just didn't feel like doing it..wait for this, wait for that, etc.

What good are the payments you are making when they are sitting in a box?
I am having similar problems w/ my dh and a window that I broke a month ago, I have been almost begging him to fix it and install it again but he won't do it. My mother told me to threaten to hire someone to do it and if that didnt' work to actually DO IT. I just might. Maybe you should tell DH that if he cant get working on it you will hire someone to install the cabinets for you.

Problem is, it's not just cabinets. We're tearing out the wall board, bricking in part of a window, putting in 2 new windows (the smaller one, and replacing one), insulating, new electrical, additional plumbing, running a gas line to the kitchen, new drywall, flooring, appliances, cabinets, lighting, paint, tile, countertops, etc..... With the cabinets and appliances paid for (well, financed), the largest costs are already incurred, other than the granite (countertops).

I don't want to make any waves about it because 1) it's not going to be done over the winter since DH is doing a lot of the work himself; and 2) he'll just press the issue about me looking for a job. yuck
 
In response to Chefsteph:

Then she'd really have to have a job to pay for the installation. I wouldn't do that in her case.

In my case, I don't threaten any longer. I tell dh that something needs fixing and I ask him when he'll do it. If he hems and haws (not even sure if those are the right non-words), I tell him I can just make an appointment if he's too busy. That works, but I really don't like listening to the hems and haws. He's been very busy with work, and therefore too busy to fix my squeaking car. He's also so busy that he can't help with the carpooling. So, I'm not even bringing it up. I'm making the appointment and getting it done. If he doesn't like it, he'll fix things before I even ask next time.

Not recommending this approach for anyone else. I have situations and history that I'm not covering here. It will work out just fine for us.
 
chefann said:
That did make me smile. It could also pass as a photo of my dad. ;)


Problem is, it's not just cabinets. We're tearing out the wall board, bricking in part of a window, putting in 2 new windows (the smaller one, and replacing one), insulating, new electrical, additional plumbing, running a gas line to the kitchen, new drywall, flooring, appliances, cabinets, lighting, paint, tile, countertops, etc..... With the cabinets and appliances paid for (well, financed), the largest costs are already incurred, other than the granite (countertops).

I don't want to make any waves about it because 1) it's not going to be done over the winter since DH is doing a lot of the work himself; and 2) he'll just press the issue about me looking for a job. yuck

So, is he waiting for you to get a job to help pay for it or what? I guess I dont understand where the "job" thing is coming in.
 
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I lost my job in January. The plan was to still continue ahead with the project, and then DH got a bug up his rear about something and said that I'd have to get a job before we started. No other explanation - and he didn't even discuss it with me in person, he sent me an email. I pretended I didn't see it.
 
Ok, that's what I thought...I knew you had lost your job...
I think he's prob just digging at you to get a job...
It prob has nothing to do w/ doing the remodel and that sucks!
My dh would prob be the same way!
 
My dh doesn't appreciate me having a job because I'm a b---- when I can't get things done around the house. AND it inconveniences him because he has to help out with more. I guess I'm blessed?
 
chefann said:
I don't know, since they're not installed. And DH hates filing claims since it makes the rates go up, and we just switched companies (if we were going to switch in a couple months, we'd go ahead and file).

I moved a couple and they don't appear to be damaged, other than the boxes. The problem is that there's no good place to move them to and I don't know which wood I'm allowed to use to create "skids" to put them on.

Are we married to the same man? It sure sounds like it.....lol
I'm sorry that really stinks... I would say get ride of the wet boxes and see what is damaged and what can be saved.
 
Am I missing something or don't you have a job with PC??? (see, that would be me, double edge 'em - YOU do have a job, you want ME to get a second? hmmmm I don't think so !) lol

I am sorry you have to deal with that - be sure to put a humidifer down there to soak up the moisture -
 
chefann said:
I lost my job in January. The plan was to still continue ahead with the project, and then DH got a bug up his rear about something and said that I'd have to get a job before we started. No other explanation - and he didn't even discuss it with me in person, he sent me an email. I pretended I didn't see it.

LOL, that is awesome, I would have done the same thing. If he cannot even discuss in person! Sorry for your frustration! If I knew how to remodel a kitchen and wasn't almost 9 months pregnant and I would come over and do it for ya! ;)
 
When we first moved in here, we brought our dishwasher from the old house (it was brand new). My hubby hmmmed and hawed for 3 years about installing it. Finally, I told him that either he install the dishwasher (God forbid he helps WASH dishes) or he could move in with his mother. It was his choice. Amazingly, my dishwasher was installed in less than a week. On small jobs, I just start doing it myself, and then he will step in to "help" and ends up doing the entire job himself. On the big stuff, I have to threaten or he'll NEVER get it done. I have threatened to hire someone, but he knows I don't have the $$ to do that. LOL.
 
{{{{hugs}}}} What about doing data entry from home? I did that when my son was just born. Typing up medical forms.
 
itsjustCarla said:
When we first moved in here, we brought our dishwasher from the old house (it was brand new). My hubby hmmmed and hawed for 3 years about installing it. Finally, I told him that either he install the dishwasher (God forbid he helps WASH dishes) or he could move in with his mother. It was his choice. Amazingly, my dishwasher was installed in less than a week. On small jobs, I just start doing it myself, and then he will step in to "help" and ends up doing the entire job himself. On the big stuff, I have to threaten or he'll NEVER get it done. I have threatened to hire someone, but he knows I don't have the $$ to do that. LOL.

3 years?! Oh HECK NO!!! I would have put that baby in myself, no matter how much damage I caused before I waited 3 years!! You have the patience of a saint!!!

My BF gets angry b/c when I have a problem I call my dad or uncle or brother instead of him. I get frustrated b/c when I call him, he comes over, looks at it, smacks it around and tells me to call my dad, uncle or brother. Um....So I told him, when he learns how to fix things himself, then I will call him first, otherwise, quit your bellyaching!! Although, unless it is an emergency...my dad never shows. He'll tell you he will fix it, like the cord around that I bought for my new floors that I had installed when I moved in a year and 1/2 ago. And the railing to the basement steps that was supposed to be done in May and the lawnmower that I broke and he said he would fix, but then again, he also said before I needed it he was going to change the oil and sharpen the blades...um....maybe he meant before I needed it next year....

Ann, I feel your pain and frustration. Kind of. My dad decided to redo the upstairs bathroom at my parents house when I was younger. I remember the toothbrushes at the kitchen sink for over a year and the hole in the ceiling of the room below it for over 7. Why are men like this?!
 
I married Mr. Unhandy. If I have something that needs to be done around here I do it and if it's beyond me we pay someone. We don't have the money so a lot of things are waiting to get done. I save out of my PC income until I have enough for a project and then we call the professionals in. I hear about others getting good deals on things but when we "get a deal" we get shoddy workmanship. lol

Even when I lived near family they didn't "help out" so it wasn't an option. Well, once we needed some electrical work done and since FIL is an electrician he volunteered. It took him forever to get the job done - and I mean forever.
 
chefann said:
Thanks. I just needed to vent. I know that somehow it's going to be my fault if they need to be replaced. (As if I could have stopped the rain.)

You can't stop the rain??? Are your super powers faltering????
 
When worse comes to worse I just threaten to give up nookie and usually things get done...LOL Maybe you should try that! :rolleyes:
 
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chefsteph07 said:
When worse comes to worse I just threaten to give up nookie and usually things get done...LOL Maybe you should try that! :rolleyes:

Eliminating that would involve adding it to the schedule first. :rolleyes:
 
LOL!!!!! Add it and then take it away, I'm telling ya, it works like a charm!
 
letscook04 said:
{{{{hugs}}}} What about doing data entry from home? I did that when my son was just born. Typing up medical forms.

How do you go about doing that? I would love to do something like that but don't know where to start. I stay home with our 4 year old & am homeschooling. We also have 3 older kids that are in school but I can be home with them afterwards. Thanks!

Sorry to hear about your kitchen Ann. I am in the same situation. My DH knows that we NEED to remodel our kitchen but we can't until after he gets a boat to go hunting. He even ripped out part of the cabinets so now I really don't have any room. Don't you just love husbands!!! uggh!
 

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