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Get Advice and Encouragement for Going Back to School: A Personal Story

In summary, Paige was considering going back to school to study business management, but is worried about the cost and her husband being in school. She has a degree from teaching, and is currently babysitting and doing PC.
apriljc
554
Need some advice and some encouragement. When I was younger, like college age, I knew what I wanted and how I was going to do it. I went to a private college for 3 years and than dropped out because of personal and financial reasons. Well I called a good friend of mine, she is a academic advisor at a community college. I mentioned that possibly I may transfer my credits from the private college to the communtity college. She told me to go for it and her and I could get together and start planning out some things if I want.
I am starting to get scared about going back to school. I didn't do very good the first time and I am not sure if I would be any good at it the second time. My husband started back to school this fall and my boys are 5 & 3 so this would be a great time for me too. I work 4 days a week outside of the home, am a FT mom. would like to keep doing PC, and now I am thinking of going back to school. Am I nuts?
I need somebody's else thinking on all of this besides mine and my husbands. I tried talking to my mother but she just sat there and stared at me, I think she is still mad at me for dropping out the first time.
Thanks for listening to my rambling.
 
sometimes I think I would love to go back to school, but with a 4 yr old, 2 yr old and a 4 month old I dont think its possible.If you are worried about it can you take like 1-2 classes a time to see how you can handle it
 
I think we grew up with the idea that a college education would ensure financial security. I think times have changed and it seems to me that with all the student loans available, higher education can often ensure a lifetime of debt that will never be caught up- especially if your husband is also in school and you have small children to care for. If you and your husband can pay for both of your educations and all of your bills without borrowing any money, go for it. We are slaves to our debt. People who don't owe anybody any money can do whatever they want. Don't be a slave to your debtors.
 
I'm like you, I never went to college when I should have, and now I'm a mom of soon to be 4 kids, ages 13, 3, 15 months and one due today. There is a part of me that wishes I could go back to school and at least take a few classes, but I'm in a situation where I just can't afford it right now. (I quit my FT job to be a stay at home mom and do PC, then my husband go laid off from his job in September and hasn't been able to find another one since)

If you are able to do it, go for it. Maybe try taking one class just to see how it goes. What field did you want to study? If you aren't sure, maybe make it a business management course. That way, when you finish it, if you decide school isn't the thing for you, you can put what you did learn to use with your PC business.

Paige is right, we all probably grew up in a time where we were supposed to go to college in order to be successful. I got married days after graduating from highschool, so I gave up that opportunity at the time. I found out that for myself, I could be successful without that college education. It took me seveal years to figure out what I wanted to do, but eventually I ended up working in the medical field. I started out as a receptionist at a hospital, and ended up as the Transplant Coordinator Assistant for the Bone Marrow Transplant Center here in Orlando. (Not to bad for being completely self-taught)

Whatever you decide to do, just have faith in yourself and know you can do it, no matter what. I wish you all the luck in the world! Let us know how it goes!

Heather
 
I did go to college right after I graduated high school & taught for 5 years (took some classes while teaching too). Then I quit to raise my daughter (who is almost 2). I now babysit my 2 nephews too & do PC. Not really using my degree right now & not planning on going back. But I am really glad I went. If it's something you want to do, do it or you'll always want to. I agree with starting slow, like 1 or 2 classes & work your way to more as your kids get older. Good luck!
 
I went back to school at the age of 42(or maybe 43-44, it's hard to remember exactly when... menopause and all!!) for a culinary degree. Why??? Because I wanted a degree that was for me, not for my parents, or for the sake of a degree. I was working FULL TIME at the time (50-60 min hours a week, on call all the time, etc), volunteering a ton, and now that I think of it, 20 pounds lighter!! I took one class at a time and didn't shy away from sharing my enthusiam with the world.

I had a great time with the other students, all who were way younger than me. I think it was a great experience for all of us: for the younger kids they got to hang around on a equal level with someone their parent's age and for me, got pretty "cool" by working and learning with them. Plus, I got all the instructor's jokes!

DO IT!!!!! It will be tough fitting it in but one class at a time time will get you far. I remember once hearing someone on some talk show talk about her fears of graduating college at 50. The thought was... well, you're going to be 50 anyway, why not be able to say you graduated!

You will be a great role model for the kids.
 
I began college in 1985, got married in 1986, continued classes until my husband graduated...and worked full time...then quit. I went back and finished my associates when my oldest son was a toddler. I quit again to work full time and be a mom. When my youngest was in HeadStart I worked there and loved it. I began taking child development classes. I took them until I had to quit that job and take a higher paying one. I made a decision that I wanted/needed to finish my degree that I started years and years ago...not for my parents, my husband, or my kids, but for me. I needed to do it for me. So, I took the few classes I needed to finish my associates in child development and then began taking online courses to complete my BS degree. Now, 21 years after I graduated high school I will finish have my degree in December. It has been a long tough road. When you work full time and have a family you are torn, but it is worth it. I would say...GO FOR IT!!
 
Going back to CollegeI echo PC Carol's comment.
I too went back to college (i am currently there in Culinary School). I too returned back to school with 4 small kids in tow. Have been a single mom now 14 years. Check out your local community College they often have a daycare on premises (it's part of the early education program) I was fortunate and my two young ones attended pre-school while I attended College full-time. Several years later I have an AA, BA in the Spring 07. And My Culinary Degreee (A.S. Degree) And My Teaching Credential in the Spring of 08. Money will definately be TIGHT but think of what you are teaching your children too. Never give up. No matter how long it takes. And APPLY for financial aid (there are FREE grants available besides the loans).
GOOD LUCK in whatever your decision is. Laurel:) :) You Can Do It!
 
I didn't go to college right after graduating high school. I waited a couple of years and then went. I ended up going for about a year, but had to quit for personal reasons. That was 10 years ago. I have an 8 yrs old and a 4 yrs old. I'm a stay at home mom, too, doing PC as much as I could. My husband works a lot of hours and I wanted to help him out financially. I'm able to bring in some from PC, but not really enough to where he can cut down his hours at work(he works 60-65 hrs/wk). I can't find a part time job(besides PC) b/c my mom also lives w/us. I take care of her(she had a stroke back in 1999) and bring her to all her appts. Anyway, I started to feel the Lord speaking to me about going back to school. It was scary at first, but once I started filling out the paperworks, it started to get easier. I'm still waiting on my financial aid status and I just need to take the Compass Exam. I'm really excited to go back b/c I know that this is going to be a good thing. I'm going back for a teaching degree. This will help not only financially, but my kids as well. I will get to have the same schedule as them and not lose any quality time.

So, I say go for it. You can do it.

"I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength"-Philippians 4:13

Irene
 
  • #10
Hi April

I returned back to university after going through a nasty divorce. I started part time then had the opportunity to go full time for the last two years of my degree program. I am now 34 and it was the best decision I have ever made. I too was never the greatest in school and I had to struggle for every mark that I got. I don't regret one single second making the decison to go back. Walking across that stage last year to get my degree and wear that cap, gown and hood was the best day of my life.. yep even better than the wedding day I had!! :p
One year after getting my degree, I just landed a great job (THis is week #2 with my new job) with a very well established and HUGE corporate office dealing with Property Management. I'm loving my job!!! I would not have got this job had I not returned back to university and got my degree.
Here is my 2 cents. You have made the decision to wanting to go back to school..... if you want this bad enough, you will work hard to get the marks you need to get your goal. I am so proud of myself for obtaining this very important goal in my life, and hence why I chose the photo I have here as my mug shot for this site!

YOU GO GIRL!!! MAKE IT HAPPEN!! If I can do it , you certainly can!

Cheers! I"m rootin' for ya
 
  • #11
I finished my degree before I got married and had kids and all that. I actually haven't even used my degree yet since I stay home with my boys. My husband though just recently finished up his degree online. It has taken him almost 9 years since he first started. He started his degree at a college then transferred his credits to a different school after joining the military and finished up his degree online. It worked out really well for him and now he plans on getting out of the air force so he can use his degree. I think if I still had school to finish up I would do it online since I stay home full time. It kind of depends on how self motivated you are. If you have a hard time with school I would probably recommend going to classes at a local college to mainly keep you accountable.
 
  • #12
Here's my story!!Here's my story:

I was molested as a young girl for many years by my father. He also beat up my mother alot too. It is sad but he never apologized and even said I imagined the whole thing when I confronted him about it in front of my brother and mother. My mother knew right away I was telling the truth but he is so good at manipulating situations and people that she agreed that I probably made it up. My brother believed me and that was very important to me.
Growing up I had alot of rage and confusion. I wanted to get out of my home fast!! So I left with the first person who said I love you, and asked me to move in with him. He was 21 and I was 17.

I got pregnant in high school. I graduated and then instead of going to college as I planned, after so many good grades and plans I got pregnant again. The father never intended to marry me and so now I was 19 and a single mother of two children. I was very worried about what I would do. I met a man and was married for 3 months. He beat me up all the time. It was horrible and my poor children were so unhappy. I finally divorced him when he hit my one year old for crying while I was working and he was sleeping off a drug binge.

I always had low income jobs while I struggled to make ends meet, but I always worked for my kids. I was becoming an alcoholic and I wasn't even at the legal age to drink. I was doing drugs every weekend and having suicidal thoughts every now and then. I was very depressed. I lived with my grandparents and it broke my heart to think of my grandparents finding me dead or worse one of my kids. My father loved rubbing it in that I got what I deserved and that I never went to college because I never listened to him about not going out with this older guy, after all his favorite line was:
"I'm always right!"

I met a man at one of my jobs in a grocery store who was a Christian. His name was Michael. He told me about the gospel and that I needed to repent of my sins to find peace with a holy God that I had sinned against. After about a week of giving me rides home and reading the bible to me, I gave my life to Christ. I cried out to this holy God and he heard me, I felt a peace and love that I had never known. As a Christian I forgave my father and mother and have moved on since. We have a relationship, and even though it will never be what I always wanted, it is still good. My father has never again said anything to me about my mistakes after I confronted him and that is wonderful. He is guilty I can tell and treats me and my family very well. He has reformed his ways (drinking, pornography, violence), and is now a different man.

A year and a half later Michael and I were married. He loved and still loves my children as his own and just last year their father gave up his rights so my husband could legally adopt them!!! PRAISE GOD!!

During that time I had gotten a great job making a nice salary as an admin. assistant. My husband became an electrician with rasies each year. Only through God's grace were we blessed. My husband only got his GED and took a few classes in a community college. God is so good.
Eventually we realized God wanted us to homeschool our kids. But we were afraid to let go of two incomes. God did it for us. I got laid off and couldn't find work. Then I got pregnant. So guess what...I began homeschooling.

God blessed my husband with the job he has right now, he has one of the best paying jobs in construction as a cable splcer for AT&T. So God has taken care of us. There were times that I regretted not going to college and getting a better education, but I don't think I could have been happier than I am right now. We now have four kids and another on the way. We are very blessed.

My grandparents were bitter that I never went to college. I was the favorite grandchild growing up and they were disappointed. One day I sat with them and told them that I am so blessed. This is what God had planned for me all along. Those grandchildren that did go to college are miserable, divorced, very materialistic and too busy to ever visit. I am happy. They finally understood.
April do what's right for you and your husband no matter what anyone thinks. Everyone's situation is different. This is my situation. Maybe God would have you to get your college education after all. If not you will still be a hard working, loving mother and wife!!

Sorry this is so long!!

Debbie :D
 
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  • Thread starter
  • #13
Thanks everyone for the great advice. It made me smile as I read all of your posts and feel more confident in myself. My husband has class tonight but I think him and I are going to sit down and seriously talk about me going back to school and of course the money subject too. Again thanks to all of you.
 
  • Thread starter
  • #14
Debbie,
You and I must have been posting a reply at the same time b/c I didn't read this until after I posted my Thanks reply, make any sense. Anyway I wanted to say that I am sorry about your past but am glad that the present is much better for you. As I got to the end of your post I had tears in my eyes, I am a very emotional person. I know that God will help me make the right decision.
 

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