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Humor My Hilarious Experience at Wal-Mart with Purina Dog Chow

In summary, the old woman behind the retired man in the checkout line thought he had an elephant in the Wal-Mart bag because he said he didn't have a dog. He told her that he was starting the Purina Diet again and that he probably shouldn't because he had ended up in the hospital before. The woman was horrified and asked if he had eaten the dog food and he said no, he had stepped off the curb to sniff an Irish Setter and a car hit them both. The woman laughed and the retired man said that this story wasn't really happening to him, it was his son's fault. The woman laughed and said that was awesome.
tlag1986
Gold Member
1,572
Yesterday I was at my local Wal-Mart buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Biscuit, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter and a car hit us both.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Wal-Mart won't let me shop there anymore.
 
This is something my DH would do. LOL
 
Here's your sign.....
 
that's funny!
 
Now, Lisa, I know this didn't really happen to you, because a PC Consultant would have figured SOME way to work a PC product or two into the diet!
 
  • Thread starter
  • #6
No it was my DS. He is a smart a** when he can.
 
Lisa, thanks for the laugh, I needed it this morning.
 
That's awesome! I loved the ending. :)
 
I also loved this story.
 
  • #10
pampchefsarah said:
Now, Lisa, I know this didn't really happen to you, because a PC Consultant would have figured SOME way to work a PC product or two into the diet!

This made me laugh too!
 
  • #11
I am crying laughing so hard.....
 
  • #12
Haha! Loved it! I thought you were going to say you load your pockets so then you have to run everywhere because dogs are chasing you!
 

1. What is the story about?

The story is about my hilarious experience at Wal-Mart while shopping for Purina Dog Chow for my furry friend.

2. Is it a true story?

Yes, it is a true story. I personally experienced everything that happened in the story.

3. What makes it so funny?

The combination of unexpected events and my reactions to them make the story humorous. Plus, who doesn't love a good story about a mischievous dog?

4. Did the Purina Dog Chow play a significant role in the story?

Yes, the Purina Dog Chow was the reason I was at Wal-Mart in the first place and it also played a key role in the chaos that ensued.

5. Did you learn anything from this experience?

Definitely! I learned to always double check the items I buy at the store and to never underestimate the mischievousness of my dog. It also taught me to find the humor in unexpected situations.

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