Should I Cancel for Her?? Grrr...

[tupachef]

I hate to vent about a host, but I totally need to!! What the heck?! Do I just cancel for her, or what?! Lemme back up... I have a host that booked off of a $1000+ party back a few months ago. Her daughter used to be a consultant so I feel like she should know how this works, but through the process of attempting host coaching, she has put me off completely. In fact, for her first date, when I called her for coaching call #3 a few days in advance, she said, "that's this Saturday??" So, needless to say, she rescheduled. Well, now her party is supposed to be this Sunday, June 1st, and I can't keep her on the phone for more than 5 seconds. She won't return my e-mails, her home phone is never answered, and at work she's always "too busy". This morning, I talked to her briefly, and she told me that as far as she knew, the party is still on. What the heck is that supposed to mean?! She invited these people, didn't she?! She told me she had! She promised she would call me tonight to iron out the details, such as the address of the party (yeah, I know), number of RSVPs, recipe selection, etc. When she hadn't called (go figure), I tried her evening number which rang and rang with no answering machine. This weekend my husband wants to go visit his parents and go to a baseball game, so they need to buy tickets and don't know if I'll be there or not. So, thus, my dilemma. Do I cancel for her?? I've heard of people leaving messages for hosts saying that if they don't call back within a certain amount of time, they are going to be taken off of the calendar, but how do I tell her that when there's nowhere to leave a message? E-mail? Call her at work? She's the one that answers the phone, so I would be talking to her directly. Grrr... Part of me wants to just tell her that she's wasting my precious time, when she's serious about hosting, she's welcome to call me, and that I might consider rebooking her... help!!

 

[Mel5497]

I say go with your gut. You can give her an out by offering to reschedule if she'd like...say you'll call her next week to discuss a date (though maybe never actually make that call). If she takes you up on it, it's a good sign she wasn't doing much for this show.

 

[amy07]

what a bummer.:grumpy: vent away.

also, even though her daughter was a consultant she may not have been a consistent one or taken it very seriously. And in honesty I find it harder to coach friends/relatives, so maybe her daughter never coached her so she doesn't know the routine.

Recently I've thinking alot about how I talk at my shows. Even though I have a blast at my shows and I do want the guests to SEE that I'm enjoying myself, I'm thinking I shouldn't be verbally saying it in a way that they don't take me seriously that this IS my job.

it's late, so if that doesn't make sense I'm sorry.

 

[tupachef]

what a bummer.:grumpy: vent away.

also, even though her daughter was a consultant she may not have been a consistent one or taken it very seriously. And in honesty I find it harder to coach friends/relatives, so maybe her daughter never coached her so she doesn't know the routine.

Recently I've thinking alot about how I talk at my shows. Even though I have a blast at my shows and I do want the guests to SEE that I'm enjoying myself, I'm thinking I shouldn't be verbally saying it in a way that they don't take me seriously that this IS my job.

it's late, so if that doesn't make sense I'm sorry.

No, you're good! I don't know why I'm still up! I think I'm just stewing about this stuff. The cancellations and such have made me think about the same thing -do people think that I'm just doing this for fun? Cuz' this business is the way that I'm able to stay at home with my kids! Maybe I need to revamp my story to convey that! Thanks!

 

[kcjodih]

I agree with Leggy on this one except that I would tell her to call you when she is ready to reschedule.
I would not send her a contact me or it's off email, you just have no way of knowing if she will be getting it. I would say if you have to, call her at work and let her know that you have taken that day away from your family to do her show and need to be sure that she actually has people coming. You can put it that you want to "make sure the party is successful for both of you"

HTH

 

[pamperedlinda]

Call the host who she booked from and see if she can help you get in touch with the woman. Also see if she was even invited, that might help you to determine if invites were sent.

 

[BethCooks4U]

Sometimes these hosts surprise you though. I have had hosts who have been flakey like this and then had a great show - they didn't need me. Others claim things are great and bail... It's always a hard call.

I would call her and say "I just need one minute". Then immediately say that you have reserved the day for her but need to know if the party is on (how many are coming) because an opportunity to do something with the family has come up and they need to know if you need a ticket or not. That should tell you.

 

[tupachef]

Thanks Beth! I hadn't really thought of it that way. I'll call her at work today and try to get some info... I'll keep ya'll posted.

 

[chefkathy]

Go Emily! p.s. cute pic in the CN, by the way. That was you in the New Director Academy pics, right?

 

[tupachef]

Sure was! Thanks!! I couldn't believe it when I saw it! Academy was amazing...

 

[Mel5497]

Beth, you always have the most gracious way of putting things!


Emily, glad to hear you though Academy was amazing. I hope to go in August...want to desperately as I still feel like I don't really know what I'm doing as a director!

 

[pamperedlinda]

Beth, you always have the most gracious way of putting things!


Emily, glad to hear you though Academy was amazing. I hope to go in August...want to desperately as I still feel like I don't really know what I'm doing as a director!

I'm going in August. (woohoo, can't wait - not sure what I'm more excited about, Conference or New Director Academy!) Maybe we can room together?

 

[tupachef]

OK, so I called her office and she answered, sounding all chipper and such. :grumpy: I told her I just needed a minute of her time since we hadn't connected last night. She put me on eternal hold, then finally another person came on asking who I was holding for. She asked to take a message because my host now had "2 clients" in front of her. I left a message for her to call me back, but I can't help thinking that she put her coworker up to putting me off again!! I guess I'll just wait for her to call me back, if she ever does. I'm going nuts here with this lady -my time must not mean anything to her...

 

[amy07]

my old boss would say to call every 1/2 hour until you get an answer. He was very annoying, but he always got a response - whether it was what he wanted or not. but that was his MO

personally, at this point I would leave her a message that this is my business and since I can't finalize preparations for work without her participation we will need to cancel or reschedule. And that I understand that it may be an inconvience to her, and that I'm sorry.






ok, maybe I wouldn't do that, but I WISH I had the guts to do it sometimes!

 

[pamperedlinda]

That is RUDE! (and, I think you have your answer about the probability of the show actually holding...grrrr!) It would be nice if she'd just give you an answer - as soon as you write her off, she'll probably have 16 people at her house wondering where you are....can you contact the past host and maybe find out what's going on? I hate it when that happens.

 

[dannyzmom]

She sounds like a real jerk!!
I would do as amy07 said above.

 

[Mel5497]

Maybe we can room together?

That would be great! I am really excited about going to Academy...I need it!

 

[Mel5497]

As for this gal, she doesn't respect you as a business owner. If she does have the show, this is just a taste of how she is going to treat you...sorry to be such a downer, but honestly, kindness works two ways and it isn't a hard thing to do!:grumpy:

 

[tupachef]

That is RUDE! (and, I think you have your answer about the probability of the show actually holding...grrrr!) It would be nice if she'd just give you an answer - as soon as you write her off, she'll probably have 16 people at her house wondering where you are....can you contact the past host and maybe find out what's going on? I hate it when that happens.

You know, if she had 16 people show up, and she hadn't contacted me, I still couldn't show up. I don't even have the address of the party because she supposedly changed the location and hasn't gotten that info to me... I talked to my Director about her. I'm going to call her between 12 and 1. Maybe I'll catch her at lunch hour. If not, I'm e-mailing her to contact me before 8pm tonight and to let her know that if I don't hear from her, it's off. If I actually get ahold of her on the phone for more than 2 seconds, I'll just feel her out to see what I'll say... :grumpy: I left a message for my past host, so we'll see what she says.

 

[finley1991]

Keep us posted Emily!!!!

 

[tupachef]

Ok, so I finally got ahold of her just now. She immediately gave me the address, but when I asked her about RSVPs, she stumbled around and finally came up with "maybe about 5". I went through the great things that ya'll recommended I say, and we came to the conclusion that it should be changed to a catalog show due to lack of preparation and participation in the planning on her part. Anyway, thanks ya'll! Maybe she'll get some good orders, or maybe she won't... we'll see!

 

[finley1991]

I'm so happy you're not going!!!! What a pain it would be to be there and after all of that, there is no way that I could put on a happy face and do a good presentation. It would be so fake everyone would be able to see right through me!Hope you have a great weekend now!

 

[pamperedlinda]

I think she absolutely lied to you and was trying to throw something together at the last minute. Good for you for being persistent and not letting her ruin your weekend with your family. I would not even talk to her about a reschedule and I wouldn't be surprised if she actually did her catalog show. You will probably never heard from her again.....bless and release!

 

[pamperedlinda]

I just reread my post - boy do I sound like a negative nellie! Sorry about that.

 

[dannyzmom]

I just reread my post - boy do I sound like a negative nellie! Sorry about that.

Funny that you say this because I read your first post and was about to type "Yeah! What Linda said!!!"
So, I guess that makes me a nagative nellie, too - LOL

 

[baychef]

I just reread my post - boy do I sound like a negative nellie! Sorry about that.

I didn't think you sounded negative at all.

So glad this was resolved in a win win situation for you, Emily! This host reminds me of a few hosts combined. The bright side? They both helped motivate me to change the way I do business.

One party, I had a host that lived 40 miles away. Called her two nights before, and left a message about the party, etc.

The night of the party I had to pick my son who was 9 at the time (starving) and I had to hurry to get to the party. It was snowing extremely hard and I was lost. Called, no answer, but was able to find the house and grab a hot dog for my son (before I called child protective services to turn MYSELF in!!!)
Found the house...completely dark. No one was there. Dogs were barking inside. I was HOT Managed to get home and wrote her a letter, waited a few days, made some edits and sent it. She sent me the packet back and said she had left me a message on my phone that the night before saying she cancelled....my phone worked fine and received all of my other messages, but not one from her.

CHANGE IN MY BUSINESS...call the night before the party, and if I do not hear back from the host like this one, my message would be...since I have not heard back from you, I will not be coming to your home for a party, but maybe we can either reschedule or turn your cooking party into a catalog party.

Then there was the lady who tossed my 40 invitations to me after I just finished the party and said...Hear, maybe you can use these, I don't do invitations. This person and her mother did not pay me. The show was never submitted, but the guests who paid received their products and I covered their direct ship costs.

CHANGE IN MY BUSINESS: NEVER do another party without a guest list. I now send the invitations out. Cancellations are known well in advance or do not occur at all.

Bless and release this person with poor manners.

 

[tupachef]

Ann, Thank you SO much for sharing what you've learned and how you've changed things from your experiences! Those are great ideas! I haven't required a guest list before. Maybe I should do that! How does your method work exactly? Do you get any resistance? What do you tell the host if they don't get you a guest list? When do you require having it? Sorry about the 20 questions!

 

[pamela]

I have been sending invitations for my hosts for years now and I can only think of one or two outright cancellations. I feel like it is my job to help them get as many people in attendance as possible and I tell them that! I don't carry host packets to my shows anymore...instead, I have a SASE with the guest list inside that they can write and keep a copy and send back to me. THEN I either drive the packet to their house/work or mail it~depends on timing and location.
This is working well! I am finding that the more I can control a situation, the better....yep, I am a control freak!

 

[tupachef]

I don't carry host packets to my shows anymore...instead, I have a SASE with the guest list inside that they can write and keep a copy and send back to me.

SASE?? Sorry!! Would you enlighten me? Thanks!

 

[chefkathy]

SASE--self addressed stamped envelope

 

[pamela]

Emily you are obviously to young to remember ZOOM!!!!!!!

 

[baychef]

Ann, Thank you SO much for sharing what you've learned and how you've changed things from your experiences! Those are great ideas! I haven't required a guest list before. Maybe I should do that! How does your method work exactly? Do you get any resistance? What do you tell the host if they don't get you a guest list? When do you require having it? Sorry about the 20 questions!

I was very nervous too asking for a guest list. I teach all new consultants to do this.

First, I confirm the date and time of the party with the host.

I send out the two items attached to this post at least 4 weeks before the party. You can see on the "Bonus" paper there are places to write a date in. So this date is usually 3 to 2 1/2 weeks before the party date. The paragraph on the bottom states that I will have to consider postponing their party...I changed it from "I will have to cancel your party"...sometimes people just missed the date and didn't send the list back.

When their deadline date comes, if I don't have the list, I call them. At that time I can usally find out if something has come up or if I just need to "get them moving"!!! If they do need to post pone, it helps both of us. Usually you can book something 3 weeks out.

Also, on this bonus, they have to reach $500 in sales. I had some one that invited 40...so I gave her the $20. However, she didn't follow with those that didn't come to the party and only had a $300 party. (The good news...I changed my business AND I recruited her sister who one of my top performers!!)

The Guest List is self explainitory and gives the host ways to think of 50 people in 5 minutes!

I send a SASE (self addressed envelope) So all I am asking them to do is give me their list.

If their list is short, then I call back to check and see if these are all the people she could think of and help brainstorm.

ONLY after I get the guest list do I then send out the packet. Because it costs almost $5.00 in postage alone, it was too expensive to send them out and then have them cancel. They never return them.

At first, I had people balk at giving me their phone number. Most of them read the bonus sheet where I have in pink, that I do not share the phone numbers.

I also offer to do a reminder call. If I talk to them 2 days before the show and they don't have a rough idea how many are coming, I HIGHLY recommend that I do the reminder call. This is done through Post Calls which I can explain another time. Quick, easy, works great and 99% of people like it!! Helps attendance!

 

[tupachef]

Ann! You rock!! Thanks so much for taking the time to type all of that out! I use PostNotes already, so I'm all about implementing this!! Thanks again!!

 

[tupachef]

Emily you are obviously to young to remember ZOOM!!!!!!!

Huh?! HAHAHA!! Sorry, I guess I am... I don't feel young if that counts!

 

[pamela]

ZOOM was a TV show in the 70's and they always told us you could send in suggestions and don't forget to include your SASE to get a ZOOM sticker!
The show was resurrected in the early 2000's, but I haven't seen it in a while now...cool show!

for those of us that do remember.....02134!!!

 

[BethCooks4U]

ZOOM was a TV show in the 70's and they always told us you could send in suggestions and don't forget to include your SASE to get a ZOOM sticker!
The show was resurrected in the early 2000's, but I haven't seen it in a while now...cool show!

for those of us that do remember.....02134!!!

I do not remember this at all but at the time I had 3 small children so I am thinking if it wasn't a kid's show...

 

[pamela]

it was a kids show, but not a cartoon. It was elementary aged kids doing science experiments and skits and speaking ubbie-dubbie.....SOMEONE has got to remember this other than me!!!???

 

[tupachef]

it was a kids show, but not a cartoon. It was elementary aged kids doing science experiments and skits and speaking ubbie-dubbie.....SOMEONE has got to remember this other than me!!!???

Oh my goodness! I do remember this! But it was from the early 2000s when it came back. :blushing: I'm not sure I know what "ubbie-dubbie" is though! What happened to that show?! Wasn't it on Nick or Discovery Kids or something?

 

[pamperedlinda]

.....not sure I know what "ubbie-dubbie" is though! .....

I think you smoke it.....LOL

 

[pamela]

ibit ibis libike thibis!!!!

and no Linda....you don't smoke it!

ZOOM was/is on PBS.

 

[tupachef]

Ya'll are hilarious! ROFLMAO!

 

[pamperedlinda]

.....ibit ibis libike thibis!!!!......

hmm, I think maybe you been smoking it!?!?

 

[BethCooks4U]

I'll have to ask my sons about this and get back to you.

 

[micocina]

Sometimes these hosts surprise you though. I have had hosts who have been flakey like this and then had a great show - they didn't need me. Others claim things are great and bail... It's always a hard call.

I would call her and say "I just need one minute". Then immediately say that you have reserved the day for her but need to know if the party is on (how many are coming) because an opportunity to do something with the family has come up and they need to know if you need a ticket or not. That should tell you.

I totally agree with Beth I was a lousy host, my Director's calls to coach me got on my nerves since it was new to me. I planned and invited people that's as hard as I wanted it to be, I was busy all the time and didn't want to take time for something I thought was trivial. Ofcourse I don't see it that way now, but I understand when I host gives the signs. I back off and say "I'm excited about your show, since we haven't had a chance to discuss all the details I will make it easy for you. One of my most popular recipes is _________ here are the ingredients, it serves ___. Let me know if you will have more than that number and we can plan to double the recipe. I will be there at ______. See you then. This is only if she has told you that it's on for that date in advance.

 

[baychef]

Ann! You rock!! Thanks so much for taking the time to type all of that out! I use PostNotes already, so I'm all about implementing this!! Thanks again!!

Sorry, have been off and out of the loop for a few days!!! You are entirely welcome!! It is my goal to help anyone and everyone avoid the mistakes I made along the way!!
If I had gotten my big girl panties on a bit sooner, it would have helped, but must be I am a slow (aka stubborn) learner!!
I need to get my big girl recruiting panties on because I have only signed 1 person this year
My business needs a serious kick in the hind end. I know what to do but between my F/T job, my son who is 18 (good kid, but he is 18) helping out my parents and PC, I just can't seem to get a rythem going that makes everything click into place. Finding it difficult to switch from one focus to the next. Jack of all trades...master of none!

 

[tupachef]

Well, get to it!! :blushing: <--- I'm not so good at the kick in the rear end thing with people I don't even really know, but, I have complete faith in you that you'll step it up a notch! Compile a list of all of your recruit leads and get on the phone with them! Listen to me, I'm trying to tell you how it should be done when I've got to get my big girl panties on, too, and get more recruits! I've got 6 for the year so far, with one pending, but that's not enough! I want the recognition for 10 at Conference!! You can do it!!

 

[cookinkaren99]

My host for Tomorrow called & canceled!!!I've been sending out invites for 4 years. WELL...... a past consultant of mine booked a show with me soooooo too save a little money I let her send them out. VERY BAD CALL!!! She just called me & needs to rebook. During the call she said I still have the postcards I'll work on them tonight & get them in the mail over the weekend.

This will never happen again. I WILL ALWAYS SEND THE POSTCARDS OUT FOR MY HOST!! :grumpy:

 

[BethCooks4U]

Okay. I have TRIED and TRIED to get my hosts to let me do their invitations and only a handful have given me their lists - ever. What are you saying to make them want to give you the list? I know it's MY business but I'd rather have the probable booking than chase them away by demanding that they do it first...

 

[pamperedlinda]

I give this form that I found on CS along with a SASE and tell them what date to give/mail it back to me. I've never had any problem getting an address list (sometimes it is a little late, but I try and allow for that when I give them their due date). Well, I take that back, my high maintenance hostess from hell assured me that she took care of everything by email....ahem, I should have insisted that she give me addresses :yuck: I digress...

When they book their show and I go over the host packet with them I say something like "I'll take care of sending your invites, I just need you to complete this form and get it back to me by ____." I do not ask for email addresses or phone numbers. I tell them that if they would prefer to do evites then I will set them up on my PWS and they can take care of that part themself.

 

[pamperedlinda]

Oh, I also have the past host comment on how nice it was that she didn't have to address the invites and stick stamps on them and make a trip to the post office