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Rant Venting: "Please" & "Thank You" Go a Long Way

In summary, Dave shared a flyer and email to attract cancer service organizations to fundraisers he was planning, but received many requests for the files and no thank yous. He eventually gave away the files and emails to those who asked.
RMDave
Gold Member
927
Please let me vent. I don't want apologies or explanations, I just want to vent.

Five or six weeks ago I developed a flyer to attract cancer service/support organizations/agencies for HWC fundraisers. I did share it with a few people.

As the month approached, I also developed an email to be sent out to my mailing list of friends, business associates, former hosts, and guests.

I posted the flyer in the "Help Whip Cancer" sub-section of the "Fundraising" forum as an example of something others could do. When someone asked for suggestions for a flyer, a very nice member of our community made a comment in one of the threads that I had a worthwhile mailer. I followed that up asking for her address so I could send her both the flyer and the mailer.

OPEN THE FLOODGATES. (I must admit, I was warned.)

Since that period I have received more than 60 requests for the items. Some were by email, some were by private message, some were posted in the forum, a few were even requested in the ChatBox. I sent to everybody who asked (and even to those who demanded; as if it were their right.)

And what did I get in return?

• 11 "Thanks you" responses. Some people learned their manners. They were more than welcome.

• 8 "please provide this in a format that I can edit" responses. Hey it never hurts to ask for help. Unfortunately, I don't use Publisher or Word as layout programs.

• 5 "provide this in a format that I can edit" responses. Notice, "no please."

• 1 "please change the email address and PWS address to the following response."

• 3 who didn't bother to use the word "please."

We're all adults here. Some people are givers (lots of truly amazing "givers" here on this site.) Some are "takers." I guess we're all responsible for that. I try to remember to say "thank you" when somebody does something that benefits me. I am (by analyzing the stats, above) in the minority.

Spread the word that RMDave is a selfish bastard. I will help anybody, any place, who shows respect and manners. The rest of you? Just because you think you're entitled doesn't mean that I do.
 
Glad you had a chance to vent. Does make a good reminder to us all. Yikes! Now, I'm hoping I was one of those 11. :p
 
:thumbup: I agree Dave. I've seen it too many times. I am sure I've probably done it inadvertently as well at least once (I HOPE not!!). But it does sadden me to see folks asking for fliers to be made (like a day or two after something is announced- they expect a flier to be posted), or all sorts of things like you described. That's why I try to post my file and say "here...do what you want with it."

There are a few out there who regularly share their work (and we all know who they are)...to all of you...I say THANK YOU!~ Even if I've not asked you directly for a file, I've probably 'borrowed' it. So THANK YOU. :D


And Thank You Dave! I didn't use that flier or email, but I do regularly enjoy reading your ideas and tips that you guys chat about in the Chatbox or in various threads.
 
I'm sorry, Dave, I realized I forgot to thank you for sending the flyers. I should know better, and I have no real excuse (though I could give you something flimsy, like I was using my phone or something). You have every right to be frustrated, there's not much worse than feeling taken advantage of.

I appreciate the hard work you've put into the flyers, and that you are willing to share with the rest of us.

Thank you!
 
Wow Dave, I am sorry that happened to you! I COMPLETELY understand your vent because I have that happen to me all the time at my "day job" & sometimes it just helps to get it out! You did an AMAZING job on your e-mail and be proud of that rather than letting this get to you. I am a very strong believer in karma ("the golden rule", whatever you choose to call it) and you will have nothing but good things come to you because you were so giving for such a great cause!
 
Thank you for saying what many of us think, but don't say.
 
Wow. Just wow!I don't understand why people can't download info posted for all the world to see ... and amend it themselves!
 
oops .....thanks Dave! I got it, but have been so busy I haven't even opened it yet.
 
Well said Dave!
 
  • #10
I asked for, and did not receive, a copy of the e-mail. I figured maybe you were mad at me about something (because, of course, it's all about ME), but then you joked with me on another thread, so I realized you probably overlooked my request . . . or got tired of sending a boatload of e-mails, and decided to stop, which would be completely understandable. I just looked to see if I even said 'please' in my request, but now can't find that thread. I did, however, see you posted the e-mail in another thread, so I want to take this opportunity to say thank you! All bantering aside, you really are a blessing to this forum, and I, for one, appreciate your kindness and willingness to help and share.
 
  • #11
Vent away Dave! You have every right. (of course I'm saying this because I just checked back through our pm's to make sure that I truly was one of the 11 that thanked you) ;)
Its not that hard for someone to send a quick thankyou to show they appreciate your hard work. Sadly in this day and age, people seem to have become so busy that they cant take a minute to respond to an email to say thanks. thats too bad
 
  • #12
I had to do the same CAPC....I went back to check and was glad I had replied with a thank you. I tend to do quick posts, but had to come back and repost.

I agree with Sarah....you are beneficial to this site. Your sense of humor, your generosity and straightforward comments are always great to see. I always look at your posts because I know they'll be funny, helpful or insightful.

I'm not very eloquent, so I will simply say:

Thanks again!
 
  • Thread starter
  • #13
pampchefsarah said:
I asked for, and did not receive, a copy of the e-mail. I figured maybe you were mad at me about something (because, of course, it's all about ME), but then you joked with me on another thread, so I realized you probably overlooked my request . . . or got tired of sending a boatload of e-mails, and decided to stop, which would be completely understandable.

I just looked to see if I even said 'please' in my request, but now can't find that thread. I did, however, see you posted the e-mail in another thread, so I want to take this opportunity to say thank you! All bantering aside, you really are a blessing to this forum, and I, for one, appreciate your kindness and willingness to help and share.

I'm sorry if I missed your email address. Send it to me at [email protected] and I'll happily send them to you.
 
  • #14
Vent away!

And as one of the people who regrettably did NOT respond with a thank you upon receipt of the email (and the one for organizations that was sent so graciously without me asking!)...please accept my VERY BIG thank you! You truly did an amazing job and saved me a lot of time.

And let it be said, thank you for the reminder that I need to take the few seconds to send a quick reply thanking the sender! It's not hard, I just get caught up and forget my manners. *slapping my own hand*
 
  • #15
RMDave said:
I'm sorry if I missed your email address. Send it to me at [email protected] and I'll happily send them to you.

No problem, Dave. That wasn't the point; I wasn't complaining, but just trying to say you had a huge amount of requests, and those who received the e-mails from you should be grateful for the time you took.

To be honest, though I try to be a thoughtful person, I don't know that I would have sent a "thank you," either (with reason, but I won't post why, so as not to give others an excuse next time! ;)), so maybe it's best you didn't send it.
 
  • #16
I am glad you spoke up!! RANT ON! I, too, have shared things (not in a while) and got similar responses to what you got. I believe in helping, but I don't believe in doing someone's work for them. So, yes, I am a "B"!
 
  • #17
I didn't avail myself of your HWC offerings, but thank you for your generosity in sharing them. If you check any threads where I've shared my own stuff you might notice that eventually I can get fairly snarky about the requests for additional formats. I've started mostly sharing things with a clearly stated message that what's there is the only version I'll share. That way I feel justified in ignoring those requests. I know we all have different levels of expertise when it comes to creating/editing/adapting files. I try to keep that in mind. However, it is not a good use of my own time to spend hours and hours re-creating the same things.No please or thank you I generally chalk up to hurried responses, though I appreciate them when they're offered.
 
  • #18
Rant away Dave!

I do not share documents like I used to for this reason. Unfortunately there are lots of people who think they are owed things, and everyone should do it for them instead of being grateful for what they have.

Thanks for being part of CS!
 
  • #19
I don't think that I used this, but I just wanted to say than you anyway RMDave!!
I truly appreciate all of your tips and your humor!!

And thanks for giving us all a reminder to be thankful for the thoughtful people here to help us all with our own businesses!
Because if it wasn't for some of the ideas and people on this site, I don't think my business would be nearly as successful as it has been. (still lots of room for growth though...LOL)

So, with that said "THANK YOU" to everyone who is so gracious with your ideas and talent!!
 
  • #20
The lack of respect people give amazes me daily. I was taught to say please and thank you from the time I was little. Sorry Dave that so many people out there don't know the nice way to ask for something. I was one that ask and you very nicely sent me the email. I then responded right away a thank you email. My thoughts are if someone is nice enough to share anything with you, then you should thank them! Thanks again.....
 
  • #21
Thanks for the great reminder... we need to not only feel thankful, but actually express our thankfulness!This just reminds me of something I read in the Bible not too long ago, where Jesus healed 10 people of leprosy, but only one of those came back to thank Him. That's a 10% response rate... I guess we haven't changed much since those days!To all of you who have shared your ideas and resources so generously - a HUGE THANK YOU!!! This site is such an incredible resource, and we all benefit so much from it. I guess we should really also thank the administrator of this site for keeping it running!
 
  • #22
Very well said, Dave.

Unfortunately, manners have seemed to have gone out of style. I work in a cafeteria in an elementary school (kids aged 5 to 11), and many times I'm behind the register. It amazed me (and annoyed me) the amount of kids who would point to the snack cart, and just say "CHIPS!", or "POPCORN!" I finally had enough and told them that unless they said "please" and "thank you," there was NO SNACK FOR THEM! It took a long time, but I do see some improvement, although some still forget. I'm hoping that by the time they reach middle school, the lunch ladies there will be amazed at the manners that the Dogwood Elementary kids have!
 
  • #23
You are so right, Nancy! I work as a hospital operator and there is nothing worse than someone barking one word commands at you.
 
  • #24
I really think I said thank you - so if I didn't, I sincerely apologize. Either way, a big huge THANK YOU to you for being so generous!
 
  • #25
Sorry Dave for not replying with a thank you when you emailed me the information. I am also amazed about the lack of courtesy lately. That's something I have drilled in my children and Sunday School kids and here I didn't use it.

I do enjoy reading your postings.
 

1. What do you mean by "venting" in relation to "please" and "thank you"?

Venting refers to expressing your frustrations or emotions in a negative manner. When we say "please" and "thank you" in our interactions, we are showing gratitude and respect, rather than venting our frustrations.

2. Why are "please" and "thank you" important in everyday interactions?

"Please" and "thank you" are important because they show that we value the other person and their actions. It also helps to build positive relationships and fosters a sense of mutual respect and appreciation.

3. Is it necessary to say "please" and "thank you" every time?

While it may not be necessary to say "please" and "thank you" every single time, it is important to use them in appropriate situations. For example, when making a request or when someone does something for you, it is always appreciated to use these words.

4. Can saying "please" and "thank you" make a difference in a professional setting?

Absolutely. In a professional setting, saying "please" and "thank you" can make a big difference in how you are perceived by your colleagues and superiors. It shows that you are respectful, appreciative, and have good manners.

5. What are some alternative ways to express gratitude besides "please" and "thank you"?

There are many ways to express gratitude besides "please" and "thank you". Some examples include saying "I appreciate your help" or "Thank you so much for your assistance". You can also show gratitude through small gestures such as buying someone a cup of coffee or writing a thank-you note.

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