How Not to Be Rude While at Another Ds Show??

[prissylovescooking]

I didn't know how to really title this and I'm not sure if there is a thread out there with the help im looking for but here's what happened:

Last Friday I went to my cousin's Premier Jewelry Party. I was being "nice" because she is going to have a party this month with me. As soon as I got there she tells the lady "oh this is my cousin and she sells PC"....this was my face ---->>> :blushing: because I didn't want her to focus on me right since it wasn't my party so everyone was asking - oh fudge I felt bad. The lady started her thing and I placed my order and so did everyone else. Then my cousin starts to plan her party with me and this lady is trying to book shows for the month of April and I'm like eekkk and I had no idea how to handle that situation because I could see the lady buring a hole in my back with her eyes How should I have handled this? I'm sorry to ramble and so forth but I have felt bad since Friday as a matter of fact I even told the lady I would host a show for her because I felt so bad. I told her I would call her back. I hate being in situations and not know how to respond.

 

[sarahsellcm]

I had this happen to me before. I usually just tell everyone we can talk about this after the party. Then I let the consultant do her thing and has we are all chatting while people are doing their orders I will answer questions.

 

[Amanda_RI]

I would have just discreetly told your cousin that we would wait until after the party (or the next day, etc) to discuss her PC party---tonight was about jewelry! Sorry you were in an awkward position!

 

[prissylovescooking]

Since I didn't expect her to do that -put me on spot I was really embarrassed...even the jewelry lady said sarcastically "so hows pc working for you" ouch! I was like "awesome"! lol oh man I have to learn how to respond to awkward situations. Thanks for the feedback =)

 

[AshleyAllison]

Since this was your cousin I would be try to be as nice as possible but I would let her know that you would've preferred to focus on the Premier Jewelry consultant since it was a PJ party and you didn't want to offend the other lady. If it were me I would try to get her contact info and maybe drop her an email or give her a quick call just to let her know that that was not your intentions for Friday and you want to apologize for the way your cousin acted. Of course this is what I would do now since the party is over and you can't go back and change it. Should this happen again, family member or not, I would politely tell the person who is trying to plan her upcoming party with you that you would prefer not to talk about it at this time and focus on what is going on right now out of respect for the other consultant. If you are attending a party you were invited to at her house for another DS company I would tell her that if she wants to talk about her upcoming PC party that you will hang around for a few minutes after the other guests and consultant leave to discuss it but not while the other consultant is doing her thing. It's simply a matter of respect, but you already know this! I hate being put in situations where I don't know what to say and it's very awkward but we wouldn't want this happening while we're doing our shows. I'm sure as bad as it made you feel it made the other consultant feel very uncomfortable. It was very nice of you to say you'd host a show and I would definitely follow through but I would also definitely let her know that you weren't happy with the way your cousin handled things Friday. I'm sure she'll understand if you explain.

 

[Amanda_RI]

If you've said that you'll do a jewelry party, when you talk to that consultant, I would apologize. Just say something like, "I'm so sorry if the focus was taken off of the jewelry--I didn't even intend on talking to xx about it then, she just caught me off-guard." Anyone with a shred of decency will accept the apology and move on.

 

[AshleyAllison]

Since I didn't expect her to do that -put me on spot I was really embarrassed...even the jewelry lady said sarcastically "so hows pc working for you" ouch! I was like "awesome"! lol oh man I have to learn how to respond to awkward situations. Thanks for the feedback =)

OUCH! I am usually quick with words but I don't think I would've known what to say to that. I can definitely understand being embarrassed, that's the worst when it feels like everyone is watching you and you are put in a very awkward and unexpected situation.

 

[prissylovescooking]

Thanks Ladies. I was going to email her today to find out more info regarding a party. I will definitely apologize. I ended up spending over $100 on jewlery either way cuz i felt bad. Lessoned learned and now I know how to respond. You all are awesome Thanks!! =)

 

[BethCooks4U]

I'd like to turn this around to what I see happened. Your cousin was excited about the upcoming PC party and she didn't realize that she was stepping on the jewelry consultant's time. You are new and didn't know how to divert her back to the party that was happening. The jewelry consultant was angry that this happened.

I don't think the jewelry consultant handled it well. As the one with DS experience she should have been more understanding and she could have made everyone more comfortable. I understand her feelings of being upstaged but she didn't need to be sarcastic to you. That made HER look bad. If I were her I would have either ignored it or if it was possible I might have taken the host aside and nicely asked her to hold off on the PC and let tonight be about jewelry, at least until the orders were in so they could get her the most benefits from THIS show. It's a fine line on what and how things like that are said.

You are a new consultant so it is understandable that you didn't know how to react. She could have said something like: "Oh, you sell PC! How long have you been doing it? I'm sure "Mary" is excited to help you out but tonight is about bling..."

I have had people talk about upcoming other DS parties at my shows and I always show interest in their company and I will mention in my opening while doing intros that that is also a great company (or that I have several of their things and love them) but we are here tonight to talk and learn about PC. If a consultant acknowledges the other company it is easier to bring things around to what is happening right now.

ETA: You already went out of your way to make things up to the consultant: large order AND booked a show. I don't feel you need to apologize at all to her. JMHO

 

[wadesgirl]

I wonder if it wasn't as bad as you thought it was. Maybe she wasn't being sarcastic when she asked you about your business, maybe she was just being polite. And maybe she wasn't shooting daggers out of her eyes, maybe she was listening to she how you worked your business. You'll be invited to more of these parties and you are going to have to learn to not be guilty about your PC business. You will have to learn to say no about hosting parties if you don't want to host them and learn that you don't have to spend so much money just because you felt obligated to. There's nothing wrong with you going to other parties and there's nothing wrong if someone asked you about your business at the party. Just respond quickly and change the subject. If they persist then tell them that you would love to talk some other time.

 

[EmilyStraw]

My PJ lady is great and she and I bounce ideas off each other. Plus, other DS people make great hosts because they know the value of personal invites. Sorry it went sour for you, but I really wouldn't worry about it.

 

[prissylovescooking]

I'd like to turn this around to what I see happened. Your cousin was excited about the upcoming PC party and she didn't realize that she was stepping on the jewelry consultant's time. You are new and didn't know how to divert her back to the party that was happening. The jewelry consultant was angry that this happened.

I don't think the jewelry consultant handled it well. As the one with DS experience she should have been more understanding and she could have made everyone more comfortable. I understand her feelings of being upstaged but she didn't need to be sarcastic to you. That made HER look bad. If I were her I would have either ignored it or if it was possible I might have taken the host aside and nicely asked her to hold off on the PC and let tonight be about jewelry, at least until the orders were in so they could get her the most benefits from THIS show. It's a fine line on what and how things like that are said.

You are a new consultant so it is understandable that you didn't know how to react. She could have said something like: "Oh, you sell PC! How long have you been doing it? I'm sure "Mary" is excited to help you out but tonight is about bling..."

I have had people talk about upcoming other DS parties at my shows and I always show interest in their company and I will mention in my opening while doing intros that that is also a great company (or that I have several of their things and love them) but we are here tonight to talk and learn about PC. If a consultant acknowledges the other company it is easier to bring things around to what is happening right now.

ETA: You already went out of your way to make things up to the consultant: large order AND booked a show. I don't feel you need to apologize at all to her. JMHO

I have to agree with you on how she could of handled it. I'm the type of person to "attack" anyone who I feel is being "ugly" to me; however, working for PC it has taught me alot...to be patient, calm, extra nice and smile alot. I did kill her with my smile and kindness. =)

 

[prissylovescooking]

I wonder if it wasn't as bad as you thought it was. Maybe she wasn't being sarcastic when she asked you about your business, maybe she was just being polite. And maybe she wasn't shooting daggers out of her eyes, maybe she was listening to she how you worked your business. You'll be invited to more of these parties and you are going to have to learn to not be guilty about your PC business. You will have to learn to say no about hosting parties if you don't want to host them and learn that you don't have to spend so much money just because you felt obligated to. There's nothing wrong with you going to other parties and there's nothing wrong if someone asked you about your business at the party. Just respond quickly and change the subject. If they persist then tell them that you would love to talk some other time.

I can take what is said to me wrong at times and you could be right. I did feel guilty about my PC business. I have no idea why? And since I carry my catalog bag I even tried to hide it behind my legs when she was talking.

 

[prissylovescooking]

My PJ lady is great and she and I bounce ideas off each other. Plus, other DS people make great hosts because they know the value of personal invites. Sorry it went sour for you, but I really wouldn't worry about it.

Thanks Emily! BTW I did get some ideas off of her. She did a quick 10 second thing about her job and lets put it this way - its still in my head how much commission she makes lol not that I would quit PC but how she said it and im trying to incorporate that with PC when I speak at my shows or just in general.

 

[Amanda_RI]

Thanks Emily! BTW I did get some ideas off of her. She did a quick 10 second thing about her job and lets put it this way - its still in my head how much commission she makes lol not that I would quit PC but how she said it and im trying to incorporate that with PC when I speak at my shows or just in general.

I just had a PJ party last night, and I got the impression that despite the larger commission, a lot more of the show expenses came out of her pocket.

 

[prissylovescooking]

I just had a PJ party last night, and I got the impression that despite the larger commission, a lot more of the show expenses came out of her pocket.

She really didn't go into what she puts in - she just said 50% commission and how she loves being with her family and thats it but how it came out is what caught my attention. When I speak about PC im like this ----->> :yuck: because I sound like a goof ball, I stutter and dont make sense at all lol

But I'm working on it....it's hard for me to break out of my shell.....literally!

 

[Amanda_RI]

She really didn't go into what she puts in - she just said 50% commission and how she loves being with her family and thats it but how it came out is what caught my attention. When I speak about PC im like this ----->> :yuck: because I sound like a goof ball, I stutter and dont make sense at all lol

But I'm working on it....it's hard for me to break out of my shell.....literally!

LOL I think we've all been there! It gets easier!

 

[ChefBeckyD]

Thanks Emily! BTW I did get some ideas off of her. She did a quick 10 second thing about her job and lets put it this way - its still in my head how much commission she makes lol not that I would quit PC but how she said it and im trying to incorporate that with PC when I speak at my shows or just in general.

How about the fact that they pay a MINIMUM of $1200 to get started...and they have a "Jewelers Fee" (in the hundreds of dollars) that they have to pay every year to stay active.
Last month I had a party where there were several PAST PJ consultants in attendance. They asked a TON of questions, and one is getting ready to sign as a consultant on my team. From what they told me - yes, they have to cover a lot of expenses that we don't have to, plus every single one of them said they eventually quit because most of their job ended up being dealing with irate customers with returns...lots and lots of broken, malfunctioning, and tarnished jewelry.

 

[prissylovescooking]

How about the fact that they pay a MINIMUM of $1200 to get started...and they have a "Jewelers Fee" (in the hundreds of dollars) that they have to pay every year to stay active.
Last month I had a party where there were several PAST PJ consultants in attendance. They asked a TON of questions, and one is getting ready to sign as a consultant on my team. From what they told me - yes, they have to cover a lot of expenses that we don't have to, plus every single one of them said they eventually quit because most of their job ended up being dealing with irate customers with returns...lots and lots of broken, malfunctioning, and tarnished jewelry.

OH MAN!!! No wonder it was short and sweet! lol I would never pay that much to start a business!!

 

[prissylovescooking]

LOL I think we've all been there! It gets easier!

I hope so! I'm glad you told me because I feel like I will never find the "right" words to say. I know there are no "right" words so I guess something that works for me. The ladies that spoke at Spring Launch made it sound sooooooooooo easy.

 

[wadesgirl]

I can take what is said to me wrong at times and you could be right. I did feel guilty about my PC business. I have no idea why? And since I carry my catalog bag I even tried to hide it behind my legs when she was talking.

And there's nothing wrong with taking your catalog bag with you to places like this! Just figure out the best response if this happens again.

I have become "friends" with several of my hosts and they invite me to parties. I usually try to get to their parties because I like to have my face around them on occasions when they haven't had parties with me for a while. But I make sure to let them know that we will discuss things after the party if they want to talk about PC. One gal asked for a catalog at the last party. I waited until I was leaving, ran out to my car grabbed a catalog for her and told her I would call her the next day. That turned into a $50 order and upon delivering her products to her, turned into both her and her step daughter participating in my mystery host show. To me it's a good thing to go to some of these parties as long as you know how to handle responses to your business.

By the way, I'm not trying to bash PJ but they are no where close to comparing to PC!! I should know - my aunt tried to recruit me when I lost my job but the business totally turned me off. Their kit costs so much that they have their own line of credit you can sign up for to purchase it. Their consultants pay out of pocket for their host benefits, pay out of pocket for credit card charges, etc. So while their "take home pay" seems good (50%) would look awesome to anybody, they pay more out of their pocket which makes it a lot smaller. My other thought on their products is if they pay the consultant 50% of the product and their two or three uplines get 10% of the sales, then how much does that jewelry actually cost the company?? No wonder all my jewelry breaks, tarnishes or has other issues. (Sorry for my mini rant!) My aunt was not very happy when I called her to tell her I stared my PC business!

 

[prissylovescooking]

And there's nothing wrong with taking your catalog bag with you to places like this! Just figure out the best response if this happens again.

I have become "friends" with several of my hosts and they invite me to parties. I usually try to get to their parties because I like to have my face around them on occasions when they haven't had parties with me for a while. But I make sure to let them know that we will discuss things after the party if they want to talk about PC. One gal asked for a catalog at the last party. I waited until I was leaving, ran out to my car grabbed a catalog for her and told her I would call her the next day. That turned into a $50 order and upon delivering her products to her, turned into both her and her step daughter participating in my mystery host show. To me it's a good thing to go to some of these parties as long as you know how to handle responses to your business.

By the way, I'm not trying to bash PJ but they are no where close to comparing to PC!! I should know - my aunt tried to recruit me when I lost my job but the business totally turned me off. Their kit costs so much that they have their own line of credit you can sign up for to purchase it. Their consultants pay out of pocket for their host benefits, pay out of pocket for credit card charges, etc. So while their "take home pay" seems good (50%) would look awesome to anybody, they pay more out of their pocket which makes it a lot smaller. My other thought on their products is if they pay the consultant 50% of the product and their two or three uplines get 10% of the sales, then how much does that jewelry actually cost the company?? No wonder all my jewelry breaks, tarnishes or has other issues. (Sorry for my mini rant!) My aunt was not very happy when I called her to tell her I stared my PC business!

I was invited to a 31 party and the host is hosting a catalog show for me so I have to make sure to let her know we can talk after the party should she or anyone else have a question. I pesonally dont mind going to other parties and if i like I will buy but I do know that i did "over" buy at this party and now that you told me your jewlery tarnishes boooo!!! lol now I know why my cousin told me to keep my jewlery in the box it came in so it doesn't tarnish that much.

 

[Sheila]

I've had similar situations. The first time I intentionally left my catalog tote in the car & just brought in my purse. During the PartyLite consultant's demo, the host mentioned that I do PC. A guest asked for a catalog and told her I'd be happy to walk her out after the show & get one from my car, but didn't want to interrupt this consultant's presentation. The consultant finished her demo, then, before doing her checkout, the consultant asked me if she could have a catalog too, opening the door for me to take this opportunity to make new contacts! I went to the car, got my catalog tote & passed out catalogs & had a couple sign up for my monthly newsletter.

The 2nd time was a Scentsy consultant. She & I had met the previous year when she was a guest at this same host's house for my PC show. The host mentioned that I was the one who had been there last year for her PC show. The consultant & 2 other guests popped in with "THAT'S where I know you from ..." We all laughed & moved on. I did chat with one of the guests after the demo about her PC products, but she approached me and I wasn't doing a sales pitch or anything, just answering some of her questions. Didn't pass out catalogs or sign up anyone for my newsletter. That consultant & I have actually chatted through e-mail messages since the show. I've given her some tips (like the Full Service Checkout) to help boost bookings & recruit leads so her business will grow faster. She loves the Scentsy product, so I think she'll do well. But I did tell her if she ever decided to jump ship & move over to PC that I'd love to have her on my team. May never get her, but it never hurts to ask. LOL

 

[esavvymom]

I had it happen to me once at a Noonday show. It wasn't a "typical show" with a demo or anything. We had been there almost an hour I guess, just visiting, looking at the products she had on the table- and using the laptop to browse the rest of the items (they are a very new company, so they don't even have catalogs. My friend, who was the host, is now a consultant ('ambassador') and she basically MADE a catalog for them so she has something.....anyway, the host mentioned to her mom that I was the PC consultant she told her about. That snowballed with a few people who heard, and asked if I had a catalog. I did have my tote, which I had set down in the living room (we were in the kitchen). Before I knew it or could do anything, there were 2 people with catalogs and sharing it with others. I left there with enough orders handed to me on slips of paper to make a catalog show for my host!i was a little embarrassed - and spoke with the other DS consultant there, and apologized. I told her I honestly did not intend for that to happen. She said she didn't care, and not to worry about it! I wasn't too worried in this case, because she didn't have a demo, people had already ordered or were in the checkout process. But I will certainly be more careful if there is ever a NEXT time! But I think any DS consultant knows this will happen! You can't control what the other people do or say, so she shouldn't take it so poorly. Just like this will likely happen to you. You can be a good judge of the circumstances- whether it was on purpose (she came in chatting up her company, etc), or people started asking her stuff- like they did for you.

 

[prissylovescooking]

I've had similar situations. The first time I intentionally left my catalog tote in the car & just brought in my purse. During the PartyLite consultant's demo, the host mentioned that I do PC. A guest asked for a catalog and told her I'd be happy to walk her out after the show & get one from my car, but didn't want to interrupt this consultant's presentation. The consultant finished her demo, then, before doing her checkout, the consultant asked me if she could have a catalog too, opening the door for me to take this opportunity to make new contacts! I went to the car, got my catalog tote & passed out catalogs & had a couple sign up for my monthly newsletter.

The 2nd time was a Scentsy consultant. She & I had met the previous year when she was a guest at this same host's house for my PC show. The host mentioned that I was the one who had been there last year for her PC show. The consultant & 2 other guests popped in with "THAT'S where I know you from ..." We all laughed & moved on. I did chat with one of the guests after the demo about her PC products, but she approached me and I wasn't doing a sales pitch or anything, just answering some of her questions. Didn't pass out catalogs or sign up anyone for my newsletter. That consultant & I have actually chatted through e-mail messages since the show. I've given her some tips (like the Full Service Checkout) to help boost bookings & recruit leads so her business will grow faster. She loves the Scentsy product, so I think she'll do well. But I did tell her if she ever decided to jump ship & move over to PC that I'd love to have her on my team. May never get her, but it never hurts to ask. LOL

I guess almost everyone has had some awkward moment lol im just glad I'm not the only one

 

[prissylovescooking]

I had it happen to me once at a Noonday show. It wasn't a "typical show" with a demo or anything. We had been there almost an hour I guess, just visiting, looking at the products she had on the table- and using the laptop to browse the rest of the items (they are a very new company, so they don't even have catalogs. My friend, who was the host, is now a consultant ('ambassador') and she basically MADE a catalog for them so she has something.....anyway, the host mentioned to her mom that I was the PC consultant she told her about. That snowballed with a few people who heard, and asked if I had a catalog. I did have my tote, which I had set down in the living room (we were in the kitchen). Before I knew it or could do anything, there were 2 people with catalogs and sharing it with others. I left there with enough orders handed to me on slips of paper to make a catalog show for my host!

i was a little embarrassed - and spoke with the other DS consultant there, and apologized. I told her I honestly did not intend for that to happen. She said she didn't care, and not to worry about it! I wasn't too worried in this case, because she didn't have a demo, people had already ordered or were in the checkout process. But I will certainly be more careful if there is ever a NEXT time! But I think any DS consultant knows this will happen! You can't control what the other people do or say, so she shouldn't take it so poorly. Just like this will likely happen to you. You can be a good judge of the circumstances- whether it was on purpose (she came in chatting up her company, etc), or people started asking her stuff- like they did for you.

Your right you can't control what people will say but my Aunt noticed that I was uncomfortable and told my cousin to chill lol thank goodness but she still kept on and that's when I told her I would host a party. She also didn't give me my gift for setting up a show lol

 

[pcchefjane]

I did a Show for a lady last Fall who was a 31 Consultant. While I was greeting everyone, she was passing out HER catalogs and her Mom was passing out Avon catalogs. Her PC show was only $200 and that was because the lady she booked her Show off of took a $50 Past Host Special. I didn't come out and say it, but hinted that her sales could have been higher if she had not brought out the other catalogs. She took orders for her 31 & her mother took orders for her Avon. These women have come to several of my PC Shows with their friend and usually are the last to decide (even though I send a catalog home with them) and the most they have ordered has been $25 BETWEEN them! Needless to say, I won't book with them again!

 

[esavvymom]

I did a Show for a lady last Fall who was a 31 Consultant. While I was greeting everyone, she was passing out HER catalogs and her Mom was passing out Avon catalogs. Her PC show was only $200 and that was because the lady she booked her Show off of took a $50 Past Host Special. I didn't come out and say it, but hinted that her sales could have been higher if she had not brought out the other catalogs. She took orders for her 31 & her mother took orders for her Avon. These women have come to several of my PC Shows with their friend and usually are the last to decide (even though I send a catalog home with them) and the most they have ordered has been $25 BETWEEN them! Needless to say, I won't book with them again!

THAT is what I mean about a DS consultant can usually tell when it is done on purpose....that was plain rude, to the friends who feel ambushed, and to you.

 

[prissylovescooking]

Oh that's not good

 

[wcsis]

I didn't know how to really title this and I'm not sure if there is a thread out there with the help im looking for but here's what happened:

Last Friday I went to my cousin's Premier Jewelry Party. I was being "nice" because she is going to have a party this month with me. As soon as I got there she tells the lady "oh this is my cousin and she sells PC"....this was my face ---->>> :blushing: because I didn't want her to focus on me right since it wasn't my party so everyone was asking - oh fudge I felt bad. The lady started her thing and I placed my order and so did everyone else. Then my cousin starts to plan her party with me and this lady is trying to book shows for the month of April and I'm like eekkk and I had no idea how to handle that situation because I could see the lady buring a hole in my back with her eyes How should I have handled this? I'm sorry to ramble and so forth but I have felt bad since Friday as a matter of fact I even told the lady I would host a show for her because I felt so bad. I told her I would call her back. I hate being in situations and not know how to respond.

I think a great way to redirect the attention would be to jokingly say, "I love my business because I can make my own schedule! Unfortunately I already have plans for attending a Jewlery show this evening. Oh yeah, my apron is in the wash also. Can we get together tomorrow?"

 

[prissylovescooking]

I think a great way to redirect the attention would be to jokingly say, "I love my business because I can make my own schedule! Unfortunately I already have plans for attending a Jewlery show this evening. Oh yeah, my apron is in the wash also. Can we get together tomorrow?"

Thanks so much! I've learned alot and written down notes (that's how I learn and make it stick to my head) now I need to say all these things with confidence!

 

[pampered1224]

It is hard when you get into those "fixes". I was invited to a Party Light Party. The host is now our tenant but remembers that night very well. She mentioned to some of the guests that I was a PC consultant before the party began. I was very embarrassed as everyone wanted to talk to me about PC and not listen to the Party Light Lady. She was getting upset and I finally had to interrupt and tell every one that I would be happy to talk to them but I wanted to hear about all the neat candles. I really felt awful as she booked no parties. I booked three. And yes, I spent about $90 that night. I have, except for twice in 11 years, turned down all invites to other parties. The ones I did go to where strictly out of obligation to a recruit and one of my best hosts. And I made very sure they never mentioned PC. I simply told them that it would not be fair to the consultant. And they agreed.

 

[prissylovescooking]

It is hard when you get into those "fixes". I was invited to a Party Light Party. The host is now our tenant but remembers that night very well. She mentioned to some of the guests that I was a PC consultant before the party began. I was very embarrassed as everyone wanted to talk to me about PC and not listen to the Party Light Lady. She was getting upset and I finally had to interrupt and tell every one that I would be happy to talk to them but I wanted to hear about all the neat candles. I really felt awful as she booked no parties. I booked three. And yes, I spent about $90 that night. I have, except for twice in 11 years, turned down all invites to other parties. The ones I did go to where strictly out of obligation to a recruit and one of my best hosts. And I made very sure they never mentioned PC. I simply told them that it would not be fair to the consultant. And they agreed.

Wow that's no good I'm not sure if I want to go to another party lol

 

[pampered1224]

OH and in all fairness to you, I think the way things went were also NOT ON YOU! You are not guilty of anything. I mean, I think it is very hard to control what comes out of ones mouth when you are literally sideswiped! In fact, I felt the other consultant was a bit rude to you.