Family Trajedy, Prayers Needed Please

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Discussion Overview

This thread centers around a participant's experience with the recent loss of a cousin to suicide, expressing shock and sadness. Other participants share their condolences, personal experiences with similar losses, and emotional support during this difficult time.

Discussion Character

  • Anecdotal
  • Opinion-based

Main Points Raised

  • One participant shares the shock and sadness of losing a cousin to suicide, highlighting childhood memories together.
  • Another participant expresses sympathy and notes that they have encountered multiple instances of suicide within the community recently.
  • Several users mention their own experiences with loss due to suicide, offering personal reflections on the impact it had on them and their families.
  • One participant discusses the difficulty of processing grief and the potential need to travel for the funeral service.
  • Another participant shares their experience of attending a funeral while pregnant and how it helped them cope with their loss.
  • Some participants suggest that attending the service may provide closure and support for the grieving family.
  • One participant mentions the challenges of deciding whether to travel for the service, including financial considerations and concerns about leaving children behind.

Areas of Agreement / Disagreement

Views differ on the necessity and impact of attending the funeral service, with some participants expressing that it may help with closure, while others share personal struggles with the decision to travel.

Contextual Notes

The discussion reflects a shared experience of grief and loss within the community, with participants offering emotional support and personal anecdotes related to suicide.

Who May Find This Useful

Participants who have experienced similar losses or are seeking emotional support during times of grief may find this discussion relevant.

J
Jess_K
Messages
447
I just got a call from my dad... one of my cousins committed suicide last night. I'm terribly shocked and saddened. :( He was a few years younger than I was and we spend a lot of our childhood playing together. I can hardly believe it and I can't even imagine what my Aunt and Uncle are going thru. Please pray for her and our family.
Thank You.
 
Oh my that is terrible. I am so sorry for your loss. I cannot even fathom what you are going through. Unfortunately, I think you are the third person on here within a few weeks, that has lost some to suicide. I hope they can give you some guidance and strength.

My prayers will be with you and your family ((hugs))
 
Oh, Jess... you and your family will be in my prayers. My cousin committed suicide about 4 years ago and it was a very difficult situation for everyone. Let me know if you want to talk.
 
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thanks.. I think I'm in shock.. I'm not even sure right now how to process it.. and I think I'll too far away to go to the service :( but I might try.. I feel completely sick to my stomach right now.
 
Jess you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. I'm so sorry for your loss.
 
You'll feel that way for awhile... it is normal. If you were really close with your cousin, going to the service might help. I was 8 months pregnant when my cousin died and ended up flying to Montana for the service. My mom and one of my brothers went, but the other brother and my sister didn't go. It was better for them to not go, but it was best for the three of us who went to be there... if that makes any sense. Personally, I do better when I'm at the service and can say my good-bye's... it helps me internalize the situation and makes it more real to me.
 
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  • #7
well we grew apart once we got older and had things going in our lives.. he was going thru strange periods in his life where he was distant and I couldn't relate to him.. but we had SO much fun when we were little playing together and that's more of what I remember. He was adopted by my Aunt and Uncle when he was only days old.. I would really like to go to the service, but right now I think it's a 12 hour drive.. might check into flights, I'm still trying to understand and keep going thru the day and SO worried about my Aunt.
 
Sorry to hear Jess, this is happening way to often right now... Winter is going on way too long...I pray that you'll be comforted during this time and can work through the emotions.
 
Jess,
I'm so sorry. I lost a sister to suicide 9 years ago. It can make you sick and really wonder what went through their mind before it all happened. I am so sorry. We'll be praying for the whole family. I hope you find some great words of encouragement and even things you can share with the family to encourage them as well. Hugs all around.

As far as flights go, check on skybus.com. they may have something you can work into your budget. I hope it works out that you can go.

Again, I'm so sorry.

Much love,
Amanda
 
I'm so sorry.
 
I am so sorry. I will by praying for all of you.
 
Jess - I am so sorry for your loss - I lost a cousin, Sue, to suicide 16 years ago and still remember getting that phone call like it was yesterday. Time does wonders for the mind - I hope you are able to make the service if you decide to go. I was able to spend a little over a week with my aunt and uncle and my other cousins which I know helped them tremendously at the time. You and your family are in my prayers at this terribly sad time.
 
I am sorry for you and your family. I can't even imagine dealing with losing someone like that. It just seems like such a waste...

I worked with a guy who committed suicide about 2.5 years ago (I had just stopped working there when I had Evan almost 3 years ago.) It had a major impact on all of the employees who worked with him every day...even more so would a family grieve.

God will get you all through this one day at a time...
 
Hi Jess--Really sorry to hear about your cousin. It seems like there are a lot of people in our world are hurting! I will definitely keep you and your family in my prayers.
 
On flights - don't forget to tell the airlines it will be for a funeral - special rates should apply...
 
Wow, I'm so sorry to hear this news. I can't even imagine the pain you and your family is going through. Hang in there! I've been around the pain suicide causes, as well as the pain leading up to it having worked as an individual and family therapist in a psychiatric hospital with children and adolescents (in my "previous life" prior to PC). Fortunately I haven't dealt with it first-hand, but did have someone close to me attempt suicide - hence my entry into that field many years later.

Just know that the confusion, anger, resentment and whatever other kids of feelings come up is totally normal. Take good care of yourself. I'm so sorry you have to go through this.:(
 
janetupnorth said:
On flights - don't forget to tell the airlines it will be for a funeral - special rates should apply...
Click to expand...

I know that for immediate family, you can contact the Red Cross for assistance. I'm not sure if they'll help for a cousin or not, but it's worth a shot.
 
So sorry Jess; I know what you're going through. I lost a close cousin about 10 years ago. I agree that it does help to go to the funeral if you can; also good just to be around the family. I'm sure your aunt & uncle would love to have you there. Stay close to your family at this time. With time it will get better; but you'll never forget. ((hugs))
 
JessK I am sooo sorry for your loss, I know it's hard when you hear such shocking news, my 40 year old sister overdosed on her pain meds about 2 years ago, right in the middle of my second super starter month, and I still feel sad, but you have to remember that it was them that were stuggling and focus on that special childhood memory that you have, I have to do that ALL the time, take care, thoughts and prayers are with you
 
Jess, so sorry to hear this! Your family is in my thoughts and prayers!
 
The only airline that I found that offers bereavement or immenant (sp?)death flights is United.
Sorry Jess.





TE=janetupnorth]On flights - don't forget to tell the airlines it will be for a funeral - special rates should apply...[/QUOTE]
 
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thanks everyone, still waiting to hear back from family members when the service might be, shopping for airfare too.. thanks for all the thoughts and prayers.
 
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I'm having a really hard time deciding if I go or not. It would probably cost me about $800 to fly out by myself . :( maybe a few hundred less if I drive 4 3/4 hours to go fly out of another city. How do I decide? I'm so confused.

any thoughts on that would be appreciated :( plus I have a really hard time leaving my kids and anxious about if something were to happen to me while I was traveling. :(
 
Jess, I know what you're going through...just went through this on Feb 13! LOTS of prayers for you and your entire family...
 
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  • #26
sorry to hear that kitchen2u... wouldn't wish this on anyone.. it's just that feeling of "what if" and wishing you could have had one last chance to help them. I had a friend and co worker take his life about 9 years ago too.
It hits me especially hard because I've been alll too close to suicide myself unfortunately. Moments I care not to revisit, but know the point of despair.
:( I'm sad for my family, but I know they are strong and we'll all pull thru eventually. Life is so precious and there are really no second chances. Every day truely is a gift.
 
If you can go, I would! You'll be glad you did afterwards. It's a hard choice though. I know it's a long drive but it may be alot cheaper to drive out there.
 
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  • #28
just to update.. found out the service will be in South Dakota on Wednesday morning and the burial will be in Colorado on Friday. Thanks for all your prayers.
 
Jess_K said:
just to update.. found out the service will be in South Dakota on Wednesday morning and the burial will be in Colorado on Friday. Thanks for all your prayers.
Click to expand...
Is the burial close enough that you can make it if you cannot get to South Dakota?
 
Sorry to hear of your loss. My cousin took his life last week. It is so sad and I feel for you and your family.
 
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